Due April/May after MC 🌈

[BellaBella38]

Hi everyone, I know this is might be a bit early to start a thread but after more than 2 1/2 years of trying the overwhelming excitement is real!

Me and my husband lost out first at 10 weeks back in December 2020 and to be honest had kind of given up. I only peed on a stick at 16DPO because a banana repulsed me to the point of spitting it out! Trying not to be too excited or paranoid, but we'll see how that goes. 🤣

I've ordered the Pregnancy after Loss book by Zoe Coates Clark in an attempt to keep my sanity, but the going to the loo fear of seeing blood is real. And I've booked an apt to talk to my GP on Thursday at 5+3 to talk about whether or not progesterone would be appropriate.

Thankfully my husband is level headed and reminds me not to get too ahead of myself yet, but it would be great to meet others in the same boat for a hand hold.

Although I wish you were all feeling more positive it has made me feel much better to see our minds are all doing the same things. I think it's so hard being used to being able to control everything and then suddenly this is just so out of our control and all we can do is wait and hope.

I hadn't planned to have an early scan but now I'm thinking if I still have no sickness by 7 weeks I will book an early one as I would hate to wait weeks only to find out I had a MMC!

Is anyone else suffering from insomnia? I am waking between 3-5am each night and can't get back to sleep. Last night it was 2:30am. Uugh. I know it is a mixture of my hormones and bladder, I remember it being bad from previous pregnancies and it is probably a good sign, but ... I had a nap this afternoon, just so I can be a functioning person for a few hours this evening so resisting the pull to go back to bed as it will just make me even worse tonight.

@somethingluscious Yes very much so but mine started since my last misscarriage.

Have you tried the calms app? Or something similar. I must admit that I downloaded one with the intention of using it, but usually end up reading mumsnet.

Morning all.

I'm a bit all over the place this morning, I started with some pink spotting last night, very light and completely gone by morning. I've reasoned with myself that pink spotting is normal in the first 12 weeks and I've had it all my pregnancies, and I've had 2 healthy babies. This morning the spotting has changed to yellow, this is completely new to me. There's no sign of an infection so I have no idea what it is. My stomach feels like it might be cramping too, but I can't tell if it's anxiety making me feel it. My poas progression has stopped getting darker but I think they are as dark as they can get now so I wouldn't see any progression now. My mind is racing and I feel completely on edge. I know I will be going to the bathroom many times to check today. I hate this feeling 😔

This was my keeping calm plan yesterday, I think it bought me a couple of days sanity.

@Zincoop Honestly I'd put myself out of my misery and just call EPAU now. The fear is only going to grow in your head until it takes over.

@Essexgalhere Hi, ex Essex gal here 👋 Welcome to the gang that none of us want to be in. How many weeks are you now?

I have thought about that @BellaBella38 but I'm only 6+5 according to lmp. I have no idea when I ovulated as we weren't tracking. But looking back on the months I did track I usually ov'd on cd 18 so I wouldn't show as 6+5, so probably wouldn't see anything particularly reassuring.

I'll just try and keep calm.

The book looks good, are you finding it helpful?

@Zincoop sorry to hear you're having a stressful time, it's definitely positive that the spotting has stopped. Remember even if you have cramping that's also very normal in the first few weeks. I often get yellow discharge in pregnancy and I have wondered if it's my vitamins same as they make wee bright yellow but that is based on no science at all!

@BellaBella38 that looks like a good set up! Is that book good?

I've had nightmares about an MC 2 nights in a row now 😕 hopefully I won't have the same tonight!

Bit of a stressful morning for us - OH accidentally stuck salicylic acid in the cat's eye instead of antibiotics (cat has conjunctivitis). Needless to say putting acid in an eye is not a good idea so we had to rush the cat down to the emergency vet and leave him there to be sedated and have his eye checked. The cat hates the vet (like, a full three acts of howling, growling and hissing every time), and I always get stressed when I have to leave him there. But now I have the added layer of feeling guilty for being stressed because I'm worried it'll kick off the wrong hormones and cause a miscarriage.

Anyway, the cat has woken up from his sedation so that's all fine, and I'm here trying to regain my calm, zen, breathe.😫Great start to the weekend.

@BellaBella38 I’m currently 4 weeks and 1 day. Found out a week ago today at 8dpo

Just holding out until 6 weeks so I can get a reassurance scan done!

Pink spotting has started again, I asked dp to get me a normal pg test and the test line is a lot lighter than control which isn't right for my dates. I think I'm heading towards mc for the 4th time.

I wish you all the best of luck, hopefully the next few weeks fly by for you and worries are eased the further along you get.

@Zincoop I'm so sorry to hear this, I hope it's not the case but if it is I really hope you get all the emotional and medical support you need ❤️

@Zincoop sending you all my good thoughts and well wishes. 💛💛💛

@Zincoop I am so sorry to hear this. Our thoughts are with you and you know where we are when you need us ❤️

Thank you all.

I was convinced last night that I was beginning to miscarry. Barely slept all night.

My dp and I decided to do our daily test this morning with fmu and the test line came up stronger than the control. I've been feeling dizzy and sick most of the day which suggests still pregnant. Unfortunately I'm still spotting light pink, it's very light, only there when I wipe but it's not going away.

I think I will call gp tomorrow and get referred to the early pregnancy unit. I've spoken already to my gp with regards to this pregnancy and previous losses and she said I can go for a reassurance scan so I'm sure she will refer me.

The spotting is how my first misscarriage started but my symptoms had disappeared that time . Also the tests were very weak. So its similar in one way but different in other ways.

@Zincoop Praying for you that everything goes well at your reassurance scan and that the spotting stops soon. I’m so sorry you’re going through this it is so horrible being in limbo ❤️ xx

@Zincoop definitely go see EPAU, it's the only way to know anything with any certainty. Hopefully they'll fit you in quickly x

Keeping everything crossed for you @Zincoop, I'm sorry it's so confusing but glad it sounds like there's still hope. Let us know how you get on tomorrow ❤️

@Zincoop hopefully you can get some confirmation from the EPAU. I think I'll be about 7wks tomorrow, so they were able to see a heartbeat with an internal scan at about 6w3d last week and confirmed things looks as expected, so definitely go for a scan if you can. They called it a reassurance scan, whereas to me it felt more like a viability scan. What was more reassuring was that they also wanted to follow up 3 weeks later.

Just checking in to see how everyone is getting on/feeling?

I had a anxiety filled afternoon today and booked myself a 5 week scan (I know this is too early and I’ve paid a lot of money to just about see a sac). I’m feeling a bit less anxious now but regret paying out in full for this scan and felt like I let my anxiety get to me

@Essexgalhere also having an anxious evening, I've convinced myself I have an ectopic and just can't stop worrying 😞 it would have been my due date tomorrow and I know that something was going to upset me sooner or later but still my mind just believes it's real, this is so tough!

@calipoppy I’m exactly the same telling myself maybe it’s ectopic or maybe it’s not growing
I’m not sure I’ll go to this scan on Saturday at 5 weeks that I booked yesterday
So sorry to hear your due date is tomorrow, mine is 20th October and I’ve been dreading it and it has come up so quick x 😞

I got my booking and 11-12 weeks scan appointment through yesterday. It still doesn't feel real, but I am glad my maternity hospital and EPAU are on top of things. I think I worry as well that things will just stop growing and developing before then - like imposter syndrome, which isn't really rational as the risks keep dropping every day.

@somethingluscious great that you've got your scan date already! I won't get mine until after booking appointment so a while yet.

I ended up having a scan at EPU this morning after a pain on my right all night. Saw a teeny heartbeat but I'm measuring a couple of days behind which I'm sure you can all sympathise that even though they reassured me it's fine I can't help worrying.

@calipoppy Great news that you saw a little heartbeat - can totally understand why you would be worried about that. There’s no reassurance after you’ve had a loss even if things are “normal”. How far along are you today?