Pregnant after recurrent miscarriage

[LostFox82]

Hello

looking for some support from women in the same boat, while I await the first scan!

I’ve had 2 missed miscarriages in the last 18 months 9 weeks and 6 weeks and found out I was pregnant again last week before starting the drugs the clinic had prescribed.

im now 5+3 I’m on hydroxychloroquine, progesterone and prednisone. I’ve had brown spotting but that has eased but have had no pregnancy symptoms apart from bloating! I’m not very tired or nauseous and I’m really worried it’s another empty sac or something.

I have early scan booked on 13th may but it’s so torturous.

anyone in a similar boat?
x

Hey @Mawitchy …… of course you are very welcome to join us! Congrats on your pregnancy and really sorry to hear about your loses:

ah that’s sounds so horrible and Insensitive of the recurrent miscarriage doctor to say that, just because you already have two Children it doesn’t make it any less painful or you less worthy of support! ……. Our dates are only a couple of days apart so fingers crossed for us both!! Are you having many symptoms??

I have been taking progesterone from 6 weeks, I did go to my GP but they were less than helpful so I had to go to a private doc to get a prescription as I was def set on giving it a go this time!

x

Oh 😂😂😂 I’m honestly all over the place! You can’t make that up! March, not Feb! Sorry x

@Emily090 😂😂😂😂😂…… I actually got so excited for you then! 😂😂

Haha! Wouldn’t that be great. I spoke with my mum today, everyone in my family have been quite quiet about this pregnancy, I think half not knowing what to say to me & the other half they don’t quite know how I’m feeling. My mum thinks I should hold off on my scan until 10 weeks - I think I agree, I don’t know if seeing a heartbeat will help much now as I saw one at 7 and then a week later my next scan told me the baby’s heart has stopped. And truthfully I think that was a real head mess, I honestly never knew about missed miscarriages, I couldn’t understand how I had a little baby one day and not the next - people should talk about it more!! With my daughter my pregnancy was so straightforward, I think because I had no idea about miscarriages- we didn’t find out we were pregnant until 8 weeks in…. The bliss!
So glad we have this platform to support each other.
where you live @Willow11981 I’m in London. X

@Willow11981 not many symptoms. I had a freak out yesterday when I didn’t feel nauseous at all. But today I do, nothing major, just a bit travel sick type feeling. How are you doing with symptoms?
@Emily090 I know what you mean about the shock. I didn’t know about MMCs with with my first one. It makes me feel like I can’t trust what’s going on in my own body. With my first I found out at my 12 week scan that baby had stopped developing at 7 weeks. I had a few other scenarios in between, but then the last one I saw a heart beat at 6 weeks, then nothing two weeks later.
mite a very very hard time. But what I do know, is that in the blink of an eye the days and weeks have passed. xx

So sorry you’ve also experienced it @Mawitchy just horrible isn’t it. And your completely right, it’s like a complete ‘haha you idiot’ feeling, thinking your so pregnant for weeks then it turns out you weren’t. I’m glad we are all finding the strength to do this again.

just wondering if anyone can put my mind at ease, yesterday and today I’ve had some light pulling pains lower down on my left side - like the top of the vagina to the left, quite achy. It’s been on and off. I’m not sure if it’s normal or a bad sign so wondering if others are experiencing.
thanks x

@Emily090 …… yeah 10 weeks is only a couple of weeks away so not too long if you want to wait till then!
I say that but I know how slowly time tends to move when you want it to hurry up!
I live in Hastings but I commute into London 3 days a week for work!
how old is your little girl?

@Mawitchy …… yeah not many symptoms here either which is massively adding to my anxiety!!
x

@Emily090 ….. I’ve had none of those achy pains myself but I’ve read lots of people on here say they have those and it does seem to be pretty normal …… ah it’s so hard not to over analyse every single thing!!!
x

@Emily090 I would say that I had more of that pulling and aching when I was pregnant with my 2 boys. In my recent pregnancies those feelings stopped much earlier, like 5 weeks. Maybe it’s because my body doesn’t need to stretch that much anymore ... but in and of itself it’s not a good or a bad sign I don’t think x
impossible not to analyse every symptom x

@Emily090 youve defo got to book that scan to check those dates if nothing else, sounds like you could defo be further on than you think!
I had miscarriages at 5 weeks and 9 weeks but the both only got picked up at scans weeks later so from my pov I want this first scan just to reassure me there’s something there, I know it’s only a moment in time (I had a good scan at 6 weeks on first mc that then died at 9weeks) but I just want to know if it’s developing at all, if it’s good news then I’ll can go on to worrying it stays that way!
but I can’t get one until 7.5 weeks through EPU and private clinic times mean I’d have to go on my own so not sure I want to do that. The wait is excruciating!

@Mawitchy @Needsomeadvice33 hello, sorry to hear you’ve had the similar pain of mc, and you’ve had such a shite response from clinics. It’s mad they vary so much. I was lucky they agreed to refer me to recurrent clinic after 2 mmc also because of age and because 1st one was 9 weeks which is more unusual after 6 week point. They did blood tests and I was told I have over active natural killer cells which he said might have changed since last successful babies or if Judy got lucky. So I’m on immunosuppressants to help that.
as you say @Mawitchy its by the by if this is your last shot, and 🤞🏻It’s all going well so far
xx

@Emily090 sorry I hadn’t read the most recent posts about type on months!

i suggested to DH tonight about getting a private scan on Friday but he said we should wait until next Friday. I know he’s right, I just don’t know what to do with myself!
work is so stressful (I work in advertising - not important stress but still stress!) and I have loads of presentations and meetings I just can’t be bothered atm! I also think I caught someone noticing a bump today 😬 I don’t have baggy enough clothes and already undoing button on my jeans!

@Emily090 I’ve had various weird pelvic pains too, I think it’s things stretching, baby might only be a tiny seed but womb is growing bigger. Aches and pains around there are defo normal. You could try EPU but they might offer the scan you don’t want yet!

@Willow11981 Hastings is lovely, and a little commute into London much be quite nice, good it’s only 3 days so it’s not too much! My daughter is 5. She’s a dream and has of course made this miscarriage pain a little bit easier - I think often how lucky we are to have her - I wonder if we knew the pain of trying for no.2 would bring would we have made the decision to try, I guess so as we are 4th round and still have hope.

i asked a friend who’s pregnant with her 3rd (she currently has a 6 month old and 2 year old) and she assured me it’s round ligament pain.

to be honest, my heads a mess today, this constant second guessing if everything is okay, if my symptoms are still there, stomach cramps etc it’s getting to me today, I think I’m tired but this is a bloody hard journey, I know I need to keep rational but I’m having an off day.

hope your all doing okay.

@LostFox82 I know what you mean about not being bothered, it’s a just feels like nothing else matters in your head apart from the pregnancy, if you really want a scan this Friday, have one, but maybe DH is right, another week might feel like ages away, but you’ll be a week closer to the ‘safer’ 12 week period, you may also still worry even after seeing everything is okay. See how you feel today / tomorrow and decide. I’ve made the decision to avoid a scan for now mainly because I think I’d still worry, just being so blindsided after hearing a HB before I can’t imagine it will put my mind at ease, and I definitely don’t think I can do a scan right now. Honestly can’t express that anxiety of walking into the room and laying on the bed, I know I’m not alone but I imagine thinking positive it the way forward for it.

also maybe not the worse if people at work know, a small support is always helpful but equally I understand the wanting to keep it quiet until we know we can shout it loud. Hopefully they’ll just think you’ve had a ‘pig out’ weekend 😂 xxx

@Emily090 …. Yeah we really like living in Hastings, moved from London about 5 years ago! Was commuting in 5 days A week pre Covid which was far too much but 3 days Is much nicer !!

ah I’m sorry your heads a mess today, some days are worse than others aren’t they and it’s hard not to think negative thoughts!!

I’ve caved and booked a scan for Fri morn! …… I’d rather just know sooner rather than later If it’s bad news, and if I’m suprised by good news that’s a bonus! Then I have my booking in app with the midwife straight after!…….. all being well obvs!

what did you end up deciding about a scan@LostFox82 ? Are you going to hold out till the 13th? X

@Willow11981 I wouldn’t see booking a scan as caving, although I know what you mean. It’s like there’s so much self discipline involved in this process. Not testing too early, then not getting carried away, then not over analysing everything, then trying to hold out as long as possible for a scan. It’s exhausting. You’ve got to do what you’ve got to do!

I’ve had brown spotting on and off since 5 weeks. But last night it started again and it’s the first spell of it since my scan last Saturday. It’s really stressing me out as I’ve been having quite a few stabby pains today too. Urgh.

im always wondering about moving out of London. I think it will happen one day!

@Mawitchy ……. God your so right about the amount of self discipline needed in the first few months! ..:…. It’s so exhausting!!

ah sorry to hear you are spotting again, that really does nothing to help the anxiety!! I guess try and take comfort in the fact all was ok at your last scan despite the spotting. From reading these forums it’s really does seem to be quite common,.
do you have a date for your next scan ? X

@Willow11981 Well done on making the decision to book your scan, I really think it’s important we do what we can to keep our mind at ease. I’ll be thinking of you.

so sorry @Mawitchy i pray it’s all very normal, as said I’ve heard it to be quite normal on other posts, but it’s so stressful, I bet you’ve been to the bathroom checking none stop. Try and get an early night and a good sleep. X

@Willow11981 im excited for you about your scan! I think I am going to wait until 13th although might see if I can do 12th because of the unlucky connotations! Would you all avoid that date or is it ridiculous?

@Emily090 I moved out of london 5 years ago into surrey but still commute 3 days a week. I’m dying to tell people at work and know what you mean about support, but work is different as of it doesn’t work out I don’t want them getting wind I’m trying (kept other mc a secret) I don’t want it to effect the promotion I’m going for!! It’s crazy but that’s the reality…

know what you mean about walking into scan room. I think i have ptsd from last 2 bad scan experience - both on my own during peak of covid.

@Mawitchy im sorry you’ve got spotting I hate that horrible stomach feeling when you go to toilet and see it. As others have said it still doesn’t mean anything bad. I had spotting 5-8 weeks during first 2 successful pregnancies. Nearly all website list spotting as a preg symptom. So try not to think the worst, which I know very well is impossible…

@Emily090 completely understand that dude if things, my daughter started school in September and I mc in October- so many mums asking where I had been etc and I told a few the truth, since then it’s ‘how are you doing? Are you trying again’ and I know it’s no malice but it brings it all back. Good luck on the promotion, great to have that to focus on.
ohhh I understand the fear with the 13th, but maybe it might be lucky for you. Everything happens for a reason they say, so maybe this date won’t be a bad sign.
where snouts in Surrey are you, we live in Teddington, just outside Surrey.
x

@LostFox82 @Emily090 ah thank you, ill
keep you posted as to how it goes!
I wouldn’t worry about the scan being on the 13th, I def think it can be lucky too! I was about to say I’m not superstitious but since my first mc i seem to be seeing single magpies everywhere i looks …….. god that sounds ridiculous just writing that! 😂😂……. Also If the scan goes ok tomorrow it will prob be the 13th I go for my harmony test! ….. but you should try and change it if you don’t feel comfortable with it, like everyone’s said, do whatever you need to do to get through this stressful time!

Hardly anyone knows about my MC’s , just my parents and one of my friends….. I’m not sure why I’ve wanted to keep it so quiet really, I think the main reason is I’m 40 now and everyone just assumes I don’t want/ won’t have a child so I haven’t told anyone any different, I think a lot of people will Be shocked if I ever do get to announce a pregnancy!!

Oh teddington is lovely, my husband grew up in twickenham and went to school there! So a lot of his friends and family are around that way! X

So I got asked today if I’m pregnant by a colleague- she said it’s pretty obvious. It’s really quite uncomfortable now, I think it’s due to the steroids which is a pretty high dose at 25mg. I’m going to have to find a reason to WFH I think!! and if 13th is good news I think I might have to tell them, I think there’s lots of people that have probably noticed but haven’t asked!

@Emily090 I love teddington! We moved from Mortlake/Barnes to village near Epsom to get the garden and space. I love it but miss london a lot.

@Willow11981 i have that with magpies too although I salute them to not get the sorrow 😂 I clearly am superstitious!
so harmony test is done at 10 weeks is it?

hoping you get a good sleep tonight, I have everything crossed for you x

@LostFox82 ……I can’t believe a colleague asked you, is it someone you are super close with? What did you say?
it must be the steroids, I think the progesterone is making me a bit bloated tbh!
yeah you can do it anytime from 10 weeks so I’ll just be keen to do it asap , depending on how tomorrow goes obvs!
Thank you, I’ll let you know how I get on! X

@Willow11981 sending lots of love and positive vibes to you today x

@Willow11981 Hope your doing okay today, it’s all so nerve racking - sending you positive vibes and looking forward to hearing from yourself . X

@Mawitchy @Emily090 @LostFox82 ……… thanks so much ladies, am happy to report the scan went well. I’m measuring at 9+0 and apparently everything is looking as they would expect at this stage!
I really hate how my brain had completely convinced me that it had all gone wrong!!
how’s everyone feeling today?? X

oh my. I’m so happy for you, I could cry! Silly I know, but we all know how horrendous this journey is for us all and something we never expected. I’ve been thinking about you all morning and had prayed for good news. I bet you are thrilled to have seen that little baby hanging out all happy. Congratulations xx