Minsters Sidecar Bumping Along - ttc graduates thread 5

[larrythelizard]

As I'm avoiding doing any of the useful stuff I should be doing I thought I'd just pop another sidecar up x

Ahhh @Minster2012 so pleased for you ❤️ 🌈 just fab news! X

@Minster2012 oh I'm so so happy everything went well and baby is cooking away perfectly! Lovely news🌈❤️

@Vil10 I think they said 7-10 days from Wednesday, and can find out gender from it too if we want to (we're blatantly going to!) 😂

@Minster2012 ah that's brilliant news! I wasn't sure at what point you started feeling things. Its quite late really, isn't it? But when you can't- i feel like you are looking at it on the screen but it's a trick and not really inside you. 🤣
@feliznavidad2 that's outrageous really? Surely you have a right to the tests?
@Vil10 I'm not sure with ivf there's any higher risk of genetic issues? I'm really not sure about that though. But age is a massive factor and obviously some people just aren't compatible together either. So risks vary for a number of reasons. It also depends on how people feel about it. If you would have the baby regardless then it makes no difference what a test would say. But if it would affect your decision then the earlier you know the outcome to the tests, the better.

@feliznavidad2 oh that's good you don't have to wait too long then!! So when you go for your 12 week scan do they tell you there and then about the NT measurements if they can get them?

@paintfairy sorry I thought that's what you meant the other day when you said there was more complications, my mistake! Yes that's true, maybe that's why I haven't really thought about it because of my age, it just never really crossed my mind to get the test, maybe I'd feel differently depending on what they said at my 12 weeks! But here's to us all having healthy babies🤍

Thank you @larrythelizard for new sidecar!

And thank you for the comments re contraception on the old one ladies. Interesting what @bez91 said about the c section healing, I had t even thought about that. I think I definitely don't want to get pregnant before she's 6 months old so we'll be extra careful over the next few months and then play it by ear. I still haven't had a sodding period yet so god knows if I'll ever ovulate again anyway... waiting for it to start so I can actually track my bbt again to see what the situation is! Somehow I don't think we need to worry about conceiving anytime soon...

Also super duper happy to see that @Minster2012 has a lovely bouncing bubba making this very real and exciting!!🎉🎉

Sorry you're not well @Lexber :( bloody covid!

@vil10 dont feel bad if you're not getting the NIPT, it all depends on how you'd feel about the outcome. They do the NHS NT screening early on to allow for earlier termination if people feel they couldn't go on with the pregnancy. If you think you'd continue regardless I wouldn't worry too much about paying for the NIPT as they're not cheap. It would help you to prepare a bit better if you knew the outcome but when we thought about it I figured there are also loads of other physical or mental difficulties you baby may be born with or develop in later life that you're not prepared for, but you just deal with it as it comes so I decided not to pay for one (prior to my NT screening). I did in the end happen to get one free on the NHS after my DS screening came back high risk, the midwife said it was a new thing they were trialling to save people having the more risky amnio tests, but if it wasn't offered on the NHS I wouldn't have paid I'd just have read up on the problems baby may face just incase and see what happens when the time comes. But I know not everyone would feel comfortable with just waiting to see so it depends on how you and DH feel.

@Minster2012 so glad to hear all was well 😁🌈 won't be long now till you start to feel proper kicks! I thought I felt a few flutters the other day too but nothing I can definitely say is 100% baby, can't wait to be sure it's baby but at the same time I remember the uncomfortableness from DS treating me like a punch bag and know I'll regret wanting to feel them so soon 😂

I'm feeling so behind not being on insta and seeing everyone's pics so I've set up an account. I figured it would let me keep my baby journey altogether in one place too so I've put on posts of the journey so far. I have some pics of DS in it tho so obviously don't want it open to the public only you guys. If I set the button to private does that mean for definite that only those I approve to join would be able to see them? How do I find everyone? I've found minster (rainbow pic that's just followed you), how do I go about finding everyone else? Total insta virgin here 😂

@Justanothercyster I'm surprised your midwife didn't advise you on how long to wait after your section, it was one of the things they really stressed to me (scared the shit out of me with 🤣). I think the actual time frame tho seems to vary according to health authority, mine said to wait a year min but preferably 18months, but I've seen online some say 6months but preferably a year. Seems such a big variance in time frame! Mine did say tho (after terrifying me with all the stats and stories of internal scars rupturing) that if I did fall pregnant before that time frame it wasn't the end of the world, it is very risky but they would do lots of extra monitoring due to the risk. It still scared me enough to be extra cautious about contraception for that first year .......how I laugh now when it took 2 1/2years to actually fall pregnant 🙈

@Justanothercyster I never realised about a c-section wait either, but it does make sense. Bodies take a long time to heal properly, even though you think it's done. Are you breast feeding? If you are then your periods might not return.
@DKDK123 have you tried to add me? Someone has but the only mutual person was @Minster2012 and I didn't know who it was.

@DKDK123 Thankyou!! I just saw all of sudden that lots of people on here are getting them and thought am I wrong for not doing so😂 I think I just have faith that because we're both young and healthy that's enough (I know that doesn't necessarily mean anything though) like you said, your child can end up with other difficulties that can't be detected or that they get later in life and you deal with them as they come! What was the outcome of your tests sorry I think I missed that?? I'll speak to OH later and see what he thinks but I'm happy not to have the test!

@Vil10 I think it's just because quite a few on here have just passed that point or are coming up to it. Its always been a 'thing' and they look for it on your 12 week scan, but obviously the NIPT testing is new and gives people another option. If the initial hospital tests show a problem then originally the only option to investigate further means invasive tests that don't come without risk. Obviously if all OK though, there are still problems that might not be seen until you are 20 weeks, its just how it is. 😕

@Vil10 they get the measurement in the scan and then do a blood test after the scan and you get the results quite quickly - more so if there's a concern.

@paintfairy I know what you mean, but on the flip side, as a health care professional - I get it... as in, you can't offer a limitless amount of rescans and they did offer the other blood test screening.

Totally agree with what @DKDK123 says about NIPT; the reason I'm so keen for it now is a) because of not having the usual screening and b) DS is severely deaf - thriving now and does fantastically with cochlear implants but despite various genetic tests etc coming back clear, I just worry in case it is something part of a bigger syndrome; and as horrible as it is, I have to think about his needs when considering if we were going to bring a child with profound disabilities in to the world - sorry if that's a bit much, but that's my personal feeling.

@paintfairy nope it wasn't me, I haven't figured out who's who yet so didn't want to add anyone else

@vil10 the results of my NT came back high risk for DS and they got me in a few days later for further tests, the urgency of it all made me think it was serious but as I said she said it's more for those that don't wish to continue with the pregnancy the earlier they get definite answers the better. She said that actually most women who get high results from NT actually don't go on to have a baby with any problems in the end and go through all that worry for nothing! They ran the NIPT test and that came back low so while there's still a very small chance (just the same if your NT comes back low), it's highly unlikely baby has DS. It wouldn't have bothered us either way, took a long time and lot of heartache to get this baby so it would 100% be wanted and loved. I do have 2 books on raising a baby with DS that I ordered when the first test came back high so it anyone else's NIPT test comes back high and you want them I'm happy to pass on.

[quote DKDK123]@paintfairy nope it wasn't me, I haven't figured out who's who yet so didn't want to add anyone else

@vil10 the results of my NT came back high risk for DS and they got me in a few days later for further tests, the urgency of it all made me think it was serious but as I said she said it's more for those that don't wish to continue with the pregnancy the earlier they get definite answers the better. She said that actually most women who get high results from NT actually don't go on to have a baby with any problems in the end and go through all that worry for nothing! They ran the NIPT test and that came back low so while there's still a very small chance (just the same if your NT comes back low), it's highly unlikely baby has DS. It wouldn't have bothered us either way, took a long time and lot of heartache to get this baby so it would 100% be wanted and loved. I do have 2 books on raising a baby with DS that I ordered when the first test came back high so it anyone else's NIPT test comes back high and you want them I'm happy to pass on.[/quote]
@DKDK123 You're so kind x

@DKDK123 no, I didn't think it was, unless your fitbit name and insta name were very different. 🤣 I've been through minsters followers though and I can't work out which one would be you.

@feliznavidad2 totally get your concerns with DS too, it gives you added things to think about. We wouldn't have opted to get rid of this baby if it did have downs syndrome as its something personally I'm comfortable we could deal with on top of DS to look after. However prior to getting pregnant we were looking into adoption and I was 100% for it till the more I read about how high a percentage of adoptive children have FAS that doesn't show till later. Having worked with many children with FAS I know how extremely challenging and unlredictable that can be and can also lead to extremely violent behaviour which wasn't something I could knowingly bring into DSs life as I have him to consider too. If we were childless 100% I'd go for it but when thinking about his needs it wasn't a risk we wanted to take so please don't think I'm judging you (or anyone) when I talk about how I couldn't get rid of baby, I do definitely get about you having to think about the effects of bringing a child with severe difficulties into your family when you also have your DSs needs to deal with. But let's hope it doesn't come to that 😘

@Vil10 we're not getting the additional tests either. We did contemplate with DDs heart condition but we weren't prepared for that before birth and coped so opted not to. It does seem popular on MN but I'm ok with not doing it 😊

@DKDK123 I can't find you on IG ☹️ I'm my username on here 👍🏼

PCR positive for me and DH 😫🤦🏼‍♀️ DD negative so 🤷‍♀️ my result says I need to contact my midwife, I assume in case I need urgent care relating to pregnancy? I'll ring them tomorrow

@paintfairy my name's nothing like my fitbit name, I'll post it on the fitbit chat.

@bez91 found you now, that's me with the rainbow that's just added you.

I'm feeling like I went to join IG...

@feliznavidad2 do it! I've got 2 accounts. One that I added everyone on. Then another i set up after getting my bfp (so now I've mostly got people twice) so that I can share my ttc things. Clearly I don't want just general friends seeing that stuff!

@bez91 oh no on the covid front 🙈 hopefully you get it mild and DD escapes it. My brother and dad had it really bad but my mum in the same house didn't catch it at all, funny how it strikes some and not others 🤷‍♀️

Right catching up on lunch break...

Pleased the results are negative @DKDK123, my DH also has the nasty feel like shit & cough but feeling like 💩, however I'm loving you are now an athlete 😂

@feliznavidad2 that's what we did for the test after they couldn't do the measurements I think it's good to get the reassurance (and we also found out his gender then too!)

@becarefuloutthere we did most of operation clean up last night as DH & I are working today in a lovely couple way, side by side laptops working on different bits of a tender currently 😂then we'll take down the tree

@paintfairy im guessing the clinic saying the embryo improved meant it split into more cells & had more fluid around it (like it turned into a hatchling blastocyst). The midwife had said to me that you can feel movements anywhere from 16-28 weeks but first time mums may feel them later, I've only had that one popping sensation literally on Friday or Saturday but the nurse did tell me today that it likely was that as the placenta is not in the way

@Justanothercyster yes I def didbt consider the c section thing that's what others are great for to help us out!!

Loving your embracing the retching attitude @Vil10 keep it going. We didn't have the NIPT test this time and I'm older & much more faulty than you 😂

@DKDK123 if you get stuck on Insta then send me a message & I can help, or ppl off here add you then you can try connect the dots or ask so it's off here in case of personal accounts. If you put your profile to private then it means only ppl you approve to follow you can see your content so if someone from here adds you then they will see your content then to see theirs you have to request to follow them (this is for private accounts)

Yes sorry my scan was at 8am, well it was actually at 8.10 but no complaints (other than a lack of lie in on our last day off)

Our friend who's just had the baby told us yet day via c section said she was told no driving for 6 weeks, you should've seen DH's face drop 😂

@Minster2012 yip 6weeks post section for driving. It's for insurance purposes, some companies will let you do it from earlier if you can prove you can do an emergency stop without pain but you know if you were in an accident they'd use it as a loop hole to get out of paying you as its not something you can prove that you had no pain so easier just to stick to the 6 week and lap up the getting chauffeured around for a while

@Minster2012 so glad to hear your scan went well for you darling, was so lovely clicking on insta this morning and seeing your scan pictures 😍 what a perfect little girl growing inside, wait until she’s kicking you awake at night! It’ll be only a matter of time :D
@Juno231 good luck with your upcoming scan, exciting times ❤️🤞🏻

The NIPT conversations confuse the life out of me, I’ve not quite looked into them so I’m not too 100 percent up on the information, I know it’s like prediction tests for genetic abnormalities right? Or something along those lines, should I be reading into it? As I’m still in the head in the sand syndrome right now 🥲🙈

Not heard anything about my booking appointment either so I shall be ringing up on Wednesday and see what happens next :) the new year new me food changes has happened in our house today, DH has gone out and got all the good stuff in.. whilst I’m sat watching him cook eating chocolates from the roses tub 🙈 hope everyone’s okay ❤️

Oh man, I was seriously considering a c section but. I way I could cope with no driving for 6 weeks without a partner!

Glad your scan went well @Minster2012!