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Refused Antenatal Scans - Help

673 replies

MotherHubbard2020 · 12/02/2021 13:43

NC for this as it is pretty embarrassing.

Anyway, I attended my 12 week scan yesterday at the hospital and was accompanied by my exclusively breastfed baby.

I was refused the scan based on me having a child with me, I asked them to use discretion as my son is exclusively breastfed but the lady was completely dismissive and said it was policy. No children allowed to accompany mum for the unltrasound.

I tried to argue my case asking what the reasoning was, please use discretion and then explained that they had a duty of care and were now refusing my care based on me bringing an exclusively breastfed baby to the appointment. They argued that I had refused my own care as I could’ve left the baby. It got to the point where I asked them to make a note on my record that I had been refused entry to my scan based on me being accompanied by an exclusively breastfed baby. At this point I think the manager panicked and she told a colleague to call security.

As soon as I saw security walking towards me I just left.

Well today I attended my midwifery appointment, the midwife explained they couldn’t do much without the scan information but said the scan department was now refusing to scan me and an incident report had been logged, if I want access to this I need to file a freedom of information request.

I am totally at a loss, I have no idea how far gone I am because I am still breastfeeding and my menstrual cycles have been all over the place plus I’ve started having pain on my lower left side which I explained to my midwife today who advised A and E if it got any worse but explained that the ultrasound department at that hospital are refusing to deal with me so she doesn’t know what would happen.

I am totally at a loss, I have an immediate family member who is a consultant obstetrician but am reluctant to get them involved yet. Any suggestions?

OP posts:
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Analysethat · 12/02/2021 21:13

I see censorship is alive and well on Mumsnet.......

troisieme · 12/02/2021 21:19

Perhaps not the point, but why is it forbidden to troll hunt? Because the very idea that trolls use the site devalues the MN brand?

ArnoldBee · 12/02/2021 21:22

You can argue your right to breastfeed with pals later. What is important now is your health and that of your unborn child. What steps are you going to take to get these addressed immediately including leaving your ebf child with someone else to get that scan?

CaughtInTheCovid · 12/02/2021 21:26

I can only imagine the only reason you won’t give the age of your baby is that they are old enough that everyone will think you are completely ridiculous if you tell us.

slashlover · 12/02/2021 21:30

@troisieme

Perhaps not the point, but why is it forbidden to troll hunt? Because the very idea that trolls use the site devalues the MN brand?
If you think OP is a troll then report to MN, that's what I did.

There have been times before when people have troll hunted and OP has been genuine, it has caused distress to the OP.

Brunt0n · 12/02/2021 21:35

@CaughtInTheCovid

I can only imagine the only reason you won’t give the age of your baby is that they are old enough that everyone will think you are completely ridiculous if you tell us.
Kid is probably 6
MsHedgehog · 12/02/2021 21:42

Why do people keep going on about the legal right to breastfeed. OP was not prevented from breastfeeding her baby. She was told she can’t bring baby with her to a scan. Two very very different issues...

OP has a toddler that she had alternative childcare for. She therefore had options but felt that the rules should be bent for her, and when they refused, she behaved so badly they called security and banned her. I’m not sure why those going on about her right to breastfeed can’t understand that...

Pebbledashery · 12/02/2021 21:45

Op. I am sure it says clearly on your scan letter that children are not allowed. Sorry to say but you had absolutely no grounds to ask them to use discretion when it is policy. Completely understand you have a right to breastfeed but do you have a partner, could he not have had your baby for the duration of your scan.. Or even waited outside in the car. You refused your own care by not complying to policy. In the nicest possible way, do you think you're the only woman in the world exclusively breastfeeding? You've had a child before and you know you cannot bring a child to a scan..it is not for you to state to the hospital to use discretion. Rules are there for a reason.

Nith · 12/02/2021 21:48

@CaughtInTheCovid

I can only imagine the only reason you won’t give the age of your baby is that they are old enough that everyone will think you are completely ridiculous if you tell us.
As she mentions having a toddler as well, I'd guess that this actually is quite a young baby, and she's being coy about the fact that she got pregnant again soon after the birth.
Pebbledashery · 12/02/2021 21:57

The sense of entitlement really is awful. I breastfed my DD for 16 months and had no childcare for anything. I didn't expect anything from anyone at anytime.
Pp mentioned a really important point. How would you expect a person whose just been told they've lost their baby to feel seeing you and a child waiting to go in? You sound like you just don't think or care about others and expect the rules to be bent because you're breastfeeding.

TheFairyCaravan · 12/02/2021 22:04

As she mentions having a toddler as well, I'd guess that this actually is quite a young baby, and she's being coy about the fact that she got pregnant again soon after the birth

I don’t know. I’ve seen people refer to 4 year olds as toddlers on here.

Yoshinori · 12/02/2021 22:04

YABU

FinalSongbird · 12/02/2021 22:11

My child was exclusively bottle fed and waited outside with my husband whilst I had a scan. This was pre-COVID.

Just follow the rules and respect the staff.

ChwistmasTwee · 12/02/2021 22:13

Is your child breast or bottle-fed? It wasn't clear from your OP.

Greenmarmalade · 12/02/2021 22:27

This is a weird thread.

I had a miscarriage and seeing other babies may have reminded me of my upset, but I’m not so self- absorbed to think babies should be deprived of their mother‘a comfort and food for hours on end because of my feelings.

My scan appointments took up to 6 hours with waiting in between blood tests, weighing, midwife and consultant. And I had to go every 2 weeks. So I couldn’t get a babysitter each time, and nor did I want to.

My hospital was full of mothers with toddlers and babies, waiting for scans. Normal.

Greenmarmalade · 12/02/2021 22:28

Don’t women who have just lost a baby feel bad seeing pregnant women? I know I did. There are a fair few of those in the antenatal room too.

Notonthestairs · 12/02/2021 22:34

It's not about who or who isn't in the waiting room (although I was one of the many who received bad news and had to hold it together outside) but that the hospital had a policy which the Op refused to comply with.

EBF babies can be looked after during a scan by AN Other - fed between other stages of appointments- and would create zero issues.

Bluntness100 · 12/02/2021 22:37

I don’t think there is any point in keeping asking how old the “baby” is..the op clearly doesn’t want to say..😂

TheFairyCaravan · 12/02/2021 22:46

but I’m not so self- absorbed to think babies should be deprived of their mother‘a comfort and food for hours on end because of my feelings

Deprived of their mother’s comfort and food for hours on end? Catch a grip of yourself. She was having a 12 week scan, not swimming the Channel

DoItAfraid · 12/02/2021 22:49

@Greenmarmalade

This is a weird thread.

I had a miscarriage and seeing other babies may have reminded me of my upset, but I’m not so self- absorbed to think babies should be deprived of their mother‘a comfort and food for hours on end because of my feelings.

My scan appointments took up to 6 hours with waiting in between blood tests, weighing, midwife and consultant. And I had to go every 2 weeks. So I couldn’t get a babysitter each time, and nor did I want to.

My hospital was full of mothers with toddlers and babies, waiting for scans. Normal.

Now you are just being disingenuous. A standard dating scan absolutely does not take 6 hours - come on now. A normal 12 week scan has no bloods - you go in, wait to be called, get scanned and leave. You were obviously at a more specialist ante natal clinic which is not what we are talking about here. A normal pregnancy does not get scanned every 2 weeks. Come on now.
Hammonds · 12/02/2021 23:07

The treatment OP received was shocking ( if true) 12 week scan is trans abdominal and non invasive. She was there with the baby and they should of proceeded. I can see this happening precovid to many women due to child care issues, not every one has childcare. OP certainly wouldn’t have been the first, it must be a new covid policy - any how they can’t/shouldn’t be able to cut you loose when the scan is actually important diagnostically. And also you cannot lock children out of antinatal clinics. A lot of women’s clinics are bunched in together, Gynae and antinatal. You could have cervical cancer patients sitting amongst pregnant women also.

However I can totally see this happening now, I’m part of a group that has lots of sonographers there is a lot of unrest at how they are being treated and are constantly writing letters to SoR for them to take action. They are not happy that -

That some trusts are allowing partners.
That some women want to take videos to show their partners if they are not allowed.
That lateral flow tests are not given out automatically.
They want reception to call all patents to check they have no covid symptoms before they come in.
They are refusing to scan women if they are not wearing a mask.
They are taking umbrage that teachers were listened to and not them.

So there is actually a lot of pissed off sonographers

However - if this is true what’s happened to OP is awful. Hospitals don’t normally cut people loose. If they have she should complain. I can see the sonographers kicking off and refusing to scan but a complete ban from ultrasound ??

wheredidtheygoto · 12/02/2021 23:08

@ChwistmasTwee 🤣🤣🤣

Hammonds · 12/02/2021 23:09

DoItAfraid a 12 week scan is most often the booking in appointment too. In our unit you could be sat there a few hours.

DoItAfraid · 12/02/2021 23:14

@Hammonds

DoItAfraid a 12 week scan is most often the booking in appointment too. In our unit you could be sat there a few hours.
I have had 4 pregnancies thanks Hammond. I appreciate trusts are different but FYI my booking in was not the same day as my scan - it was 2 separate appointments and my scan took 40 mins total including being sent to the small room where you go when your baby is dead. 6 hours sounds really excessive - how many women would they see in a day - 2?
MintyMabel · 12/02/2021 23:15

If I had walked out of my scan after finding out the baby had died and saw you sitting there with your baby it would destroy me. This is one of the reasons even pre Covid you weren't allowed to bring you child.

This has nothing to do with their reasons. I walked out of a scan being told exactly that, past a room full of still pregnant women, then past the room full of women with babies waiting for a paeds clinic.

I gave birth to a baby who was whisked away to NNICU and spent 3 days on a ward full of healthy crying babies. Women who had stillborn babies were also on the same ward. The system isn’t sensitive to these issues at all.