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Refused Antenatal Scans - Help

673 replies

MotherHubbard2020 · 12/02/2021 13:43

NC for this as it is pretty embarrassing.

Anyway, I attended my 12 week scan yesterday at the hospital and was accompanied by my exclusively breastfed baby.

I was refused the scan based on me having a child with me, I asked them to use discretion as my son is exclusively breastfed but the lady was completely dismissive and said it was policy. No children allowed to accompany mum for the unltrasound.

I tried to argue my case asking what the reasoning was, please use discretion and then explained that they had a duty of care and were now refusing my care based on me bringing an exclusively breastfed baby to the appointment. They argued that I had refused my own care as I could’ve left the baby. It got to the point where I asked them to make a note on my record that I had been refused entry to my scan based on me being accompanied by an exclusively breastfed baby. At this point I think the manager panicked and she told a colleague to call security.

As soon as I saw security walking towards me I just left.

Well today I attended my midwifery appointment, the midwife explained they couldn’t do much without the scan information but said the scan department was now refusing to scan me and an incident report had been logged, if I want access to this I need to file a freedom of information request.

I am totally at a loss, I have no idea how far gone I am because I am still breastfeeding and my menstrual cycles have been all over the place plus I’ve started having pain on my lower left side which I explained to my midwife today who advised A and E if it got any worse but explained that the ultrasound department at that hospital are refusing to deal with me so she doesn’t know what would happen.

I am totally at a loss, I have an immediate family member who is a consultant obstetrician but am reluctant to get them involved yet. Any suggestions?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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SunshineCake · 12/02/2021 17:16

@Notonthestairs

Sunshine - my kids are 12 & 13 and we definitely couldn't take the eldest in when I was being scanned for the second.
My dh and dcs were in the room when I got scanned. The baby is now 15. There were problems so they might have been allowed to stay because of that but we weren't told they had to leave before the problems were discovered.
katnyps · 12/02/2021 17:17

@Kitkat151
Haha sorry I'm not a professional so guess I'm not up with the lingo! I've learnt about all this very recently so not using "old jargon" from times gone past - think it's just my interpretation of what something means in words I remember...

Kitkat151 · 12/02/2021 17:18

[quote katnyps]@WalkingMeAway
Do you work for the NHS? I'm genuinely curious about how this fits in with the NHS policy of supporting breastfeeding outpatients. Or am I wrong? Does that not exist and I've got it confused with inpatients only?[/quote]
It’s where it’s reasonably practicable..... in this case and many others.....it’s not

Warrickdaviesasplates · 12/02/2021 17:19

Op is there no contact or support from the babies father/fathers?

When I had my last scan DH had to drive me to the hospital and wait with the kids in the car.

All my hospital letters have stated not to bring children to the scan and that the scan may be unable to take place should you bring children with you, I remember that being the case 2 years ago when I had DS and my most recent letter was only amended to add "due to Covid we are unable to accommodate partners at the scans".

Kitkat151 · 12/02/2021 17:20

[quote katnyps]@Kitkat151
Haha sorry I'm not a professional so guess I'm not up with the lingo! I've learnt about all this very recently so not using "old jargon" from times gone past - think it's just my interpretation of what something means in words I remember...[/quote]
So you need to go on the Unicef Baby Friendly website..... that is gold standard information used by midwives, HV etc
Educate yourself!

katnyps · 12/02/2021 17:20

@Kitkat151
Regards the "where practicable" how do the different trusts ensure consistency of this? Do they have risk assessments available to staff for different departments that they refer to or is it down to the judgement of individuals at the time? If so, are they required to justify their actions if there is a PALS complaint brought against them? That seems a bit like it might leave individuals who work at the various trusts a bit exposed, as in the case of the press and journal article I posted?

Parker231 · 12/02/2021 17:21

How old is the baby? Why couldn’t you leave the baby with a friend or family in the car outside? Hospital letters say not to bring children with you.

mylovelydd · 12/02/2021 17:21

I don't understand why if a hospital has a policy of no children at scans for various very good reasons, OP thinks that her baby being exclusively breast fed seems to trump that.
Where is the father of these children? Why couldn't he hold the baby outside or in the car if she needs a scan?

Exclusively breast feeding is a wonderful thing but it doesn't give you a special blue rosette to do whatever you like.
Don't you think the NHS has enough shit to deal with right now without people stamping their feet and kicking off to the level where security have to be called OP?

katnyps · 12/02/2021 17:21

@Kitkat151
but I'm not a professional - was it not clear from my wording what I meant?

katnyps · 12/02/2021 17:24

PS. shouting "educate yourself!" at someone is a bit rude. For all these people on here talking about how to be "polite" a lot of you could take a lesson from your own books...

SunshineCake · 12/02/2021 17:25

@DoItAfraid

Why the aggressive tone? The letter did not state we couldn't take a child with us.

If we had been told they couldn't be there dh would have taken them to the car.

At no point did they say take the dcs away.

borntobequiet · 12/02/2021 17:27

[quote katnyps]@borntobequiet
Hehe you'd be surprised! Latest NHS guidance is to feed on demand.[/quote]
Goodness me again. I pretty much “fed on demand” in the 1980s, except it didn’t have a special name then. However I did go out without the baby sometimes, when I needed a break. Their Nan gave them a dummy to suck on and sang to them. Her singing was awful but she was cuddly so they fell asleep.

katnyps · 12/02/2021 17:28

For everyone asking where the husband was - SO many reasons why they may not have been able to be there...

No husband (before we get into this - LOADS of reasons why this may be!)
They also work in the NHS
They work in the armed forces
They work offshore
They are ill in hospital
... the list goes on

Bluntness100 · 12/02/2021 17:28

@WalkingMeAway

Oh my god this thread, it’s painful 🤣

It’s nothing to do with breastfeeding. It’s not discriminatory against breastfeeding mothers or babies.

It’s about a rule which is a simple blanket - no children

No exceptions.

I know. Katnyps is so obsessed with breastfeeding the fact the thread is not about that is totally and utterly irrelevant to her. She’s just banging her own drum. 😂
Lalapurple · 12/02/2021 17:30

I don't think babies should be in scans if there is another option- for example bringing someone with you who can hold the baby outside.
But people on this thread are very harsh. There will be some women who literally have no one. Whenever I tried to leave my baby for more than half an hour when he was under 7 months he would get very distressed and scream. I think there should be some discretion for pregnant woman with very young babies whether they are breastfed or not.

Perhaps phoning ahead and explaining the situation would have been the best plan?
And it's outrageous that the Op has been barred from going back for a scan. Unless she was really aggressive seems over the top and should be challenged.

Kitkat151 · 12/02/2021 17:30

@katnyps

PS. shouting "educate yourself!" at someone is a bit rude. For all these people on here talking about how to be "polite" a lot of you could take a lesson from your own books...
Who shouted? You come across as an advocate of breast feeding , you have shown a curiosity in some people’s post but say yourself you are not a professional ...... so I was simply pointing you in the right direction 😀

won’t waste my time in future

katnyps · 12/02/2021 17:33

@Kitkat151
Ending a sentence with an ! is shouting

WalkingMeAway · 12/02/2021 17:34

@katnyps

No. Why would I need to work for the NHS to understand a simple rule ?

A dating scan lasts around 30m. How is it discrimination against breastfeeding mothers to say their babies are not allowed to attend ?

It’s not a half day admission. It’s a short medical appointment that’s not suitable for children.

What difference is it for parents of bottle fed babies ? You just time the feeds around the appointment.

Would she have expected to BF during the scan then? Completely unnecessary.

It’s really not difficult. The sense of entitlement is baffling.

Surely someone could have helped with childcare ? Either waited in the car, waited outside (yes it’s cold, not ideal but no ones going to die), or stayed at home with baby while OP travelled to the appointment alone.

Unless of course the OP fell pregnant by sperm donor and has no family or friends.

We had no childcare for my most recent 12w scan so children stayed with DH and I went alone.

katnyps · 12/02/2021 17:34

I think the word "snide" sums up a lot of the posts on here

Maddison12 · 12/02/2021 17:34

15 pages and I still didn't find out how old the baby is🙄

Mummyof2Terrors · 12/02/2021 17:36

Having re read it, there's a lot of drip feeding here and makes me think it's a wind up.

Those of you arguing the baby could be there, really? Who holds the baby? What happens if the baby is in a car seat or pram screaming while the scan is done, thus making the job really difficult. You can't just stop the scan midway to get a boob out. It's a medical procedure with a time slot.

DoItAfraid · 12/02/2021 17:40

[quote SunshineCake]@DoItAfraid

Why the aggressive tone? The letter did not state we couldn't take a child with us.

If we had been told they couldn't be there dh would have taken them to the car.

At no point did they say take the dcs away.[/quote]
I wasn't aggressive.

I said "may I ask why you did that?" Quite a straightforward question.

fairyannie · 12/02/2021 17:40

My daughter had a 12 wk scan during lockdown. Her baby was 6 months old (only just 6 months) and she hadn't started weaning. Her baby was breastfed and he was feeding between 3 and 4 hourly. This baby was due 12 months after her last baby was born but arrived 2 months early so there's just 10 months between them.

Her partner was waiting outside with baby in the car when she had the scan as, at that point, partners were not allowed into scans. If he had have been allowed in I would have had the baby for the couple of hours it would have taken them to get to the hospital and back.

OP's baby could be 5/6 months? Especially if baby was in a car seat as she said in a later post.

My daughter has had to leave 6wk old baby who was actually still 39wks gestation with me while her 12 month old had the MMR vaccine. He feeds between 2-3 hrly and she had plenty of time to go to the appointment and get back in between feeds.

No need for breastfed babies to go to mum's appointments though - unless absolutely no one available to watch baby for a couple of hours.

DoItAfraid · 12/02/2021 17:40

@katnyps

I think the word "snide" sums up a lot of the posts on here
Mostly yours, to be honest.
BigBadVoodooHat · 12/02/2021 17:41

@katnyps

I think the word "snide" sums up a lot of the posts on here
Indeed. But you've been rather carried away with the sound of your own voice, so you probably didn't realise you were coming across that way. Grin
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