Due April 2021

[BoJingle]

Is around who's due in April 2021? How are you feeling?

I was in a thread on here in early pregnancy, dropped off when I joined the buddies Facebook group, I'm still in it but its not really for me.... I miss having a place to go to chat pregnancy though.

Where we are, birth partners can be with you the entire time, but they cannot leave the hospital at all and need a negative Covid test within 24hrs of going in

@GentleParent my midwife has been very quiet on this and I live in an area that had quite harsh restrictions compared to others! Thanks for the reminder, I will ask at my next appt.

@flappityflippers1 did that info come from your midwife or have your trust been pretty good with info?

In my area, you can have a birthing partner go in with you and stay the entire time you are in there. However, if they leave they can not come back.

I'm my area you can have one birthing partner from active labour or 4cm and no visiting at all on the ward! They have to leave one hour after birth.

@1sttimemumtobe2021 from the hospital itself, we’ve had really excellent communication.

We are having a section, but there has been a few women going through for induction while I’ve been at appointments and they’ve all had their birth partners go up to the ward with them, also seen a few women turning up in labour and they’ve had partners with them (it’s a very interesting triage! Most memorable woman was the one growling “cunnnnnnnt” at each contraction 😂). So I think the partners being with you but not leaving is across the board here.

Our hospital lets birth partner stay for 4 hours after the birth and then visiting 1-5 each day. I was on postnatal ward for 5 days last time and had a really rough experience - I'm worried about ending up in that situation on my own... I wonder if the rules will relax in time for mid April births...?

@gentleparent I hope so too. The postnatal ward is hard going as the midwife's are always so busy, but if you've had a rough birth and can't get up and walk to help your baby settle for example then it's a bit of a nightmare! It's the part I'm most dreading to be honest, I'd love it if I don't have to stay at all!

I’m amazed at how wildly it varies from trust to trust. I really hope it’s eased more and you have a much better time of it this time around both x

It really does seem to vary massively doesn't it! Yes I'm worried about the ward after as well @GentleParent. It just feels like there is a lack of support postnatally generally, so I want to be out as soon as possible.

I've heard of someone in the last few weeks that gave birth at my hospital and she was out within 5 hours. It was her second baby. Hopefully you have a similar experience to that. But it's not nice having the added anxiety of worrying about the postnatal ward when we have enough on our mind!

I've actually changed hospitals because a) my experience was really quite negative last time and the idea of being there again was making me so anxious and b) the hospital I've moved to has marginally more relaxed visiting hours for birth partners (4 hours after birth as opposed to 1 hour - I was still in theatre being stitched up an hour after my first birth!). Although I recognise the seriousness of covid, I feel that the support of a partner during the postnatal period should be part of the baseline of care.

@GentleParent I have just spoken to another friend who gave birth in a hospital in my trust and they were allowed 1 hour on the postnatal ward. That seems mad! I never thought it would be less than 2 hours.

Glad you've taken some action which will hopefully make you less anxious. I'm back to being anxious! First time mum, I won't have the foggiest what to do one hour post birth. I'm hoping they will be relatively flexible but that may be wishful thinking.

Are many of you going to wards after? How do they work. Sorry if it seems a silly question they don't have them in this area and I'm quite fascinated about it haha. After you've had baby and all sorted do you go down to a ward with other new mums just separated by a curtain? Do the babies not set each other off when they cry?

@Flyingfrogspawn I’ve been told that we will be in a side room, and only on the ward if all rooms are full. If I am on a ward, DH can stay with me, and they have you really spread out due to COVID.

I had a side room last time so no idea about wards normally.

@flyingfrogspawn yes if it's not your baby crying then there is someone else's crying so the chances of a good rest are minimal! I remember last time the woman next to me snoring through her babies crying, I still have nightmares about that! Hopefully she won't be there this time

Ohh thanks everyone. I suppose it would be nice if your socialable to have others around you in the same position, especially in these times if your partners can't stay. I was in a side room when I had my daughter. It was about 4am when we got moved, and my husband just fell straight to sleep. I couldn't sleep for watching her so did feel quite daunting and alone in those first few hours after.

We don't have wards in my hospital either, just private rooms, which I'm grateful for.

Don't worry about not knowing what to do, the midwives will support you and a lot of mothering is instinct. Last time after a really traumatic birth I sent DH home for sleep and was fine by myself. Baby was taken to NICU a few hours after birth but I was able to go down and see her and could waddle there despite the episiotomy, forceps, ventose and stitches. They do encourage you to get up as soon as you can.

Also, ask everyone to check your baby for tongue tie, midwives and doctors. It can be difficult to breastfeed a baby with tongue tie and having it snipped early can help.

@Handsoffstrikesagain o no don't worry, Im clueless 🤣 My plan atm is to give birth in the midwife led unit, partner allowed in, can stay for a few hours after birth then head home. I really hope I don't get transferred onto a postnatal ward, OH would only be allowed to visit for 1hr a day.
Re food, I get low sugar levels and shakes, so just need to make sure I have food on me incase they are slow with the toast 😆 I have a low ish BMI, so need to eat often 🙈

Im getting so excited now!
Only issue atm is MIL wants to organise a 80th birthday party for my OH nan at our new house once lockdown eases....Im not being rude saying no for any date in April am I 🙈🙈

I believe at my hospital partners are allowed for the whole thing, and allowed to stay after. Not sure if they are allowed to leave and then come back tho, so will need to make sure my snack bag is FULL and someone has keys to feed the cat!

@blodyn91 100% no to a party at your house! What is MIL thinking! 😂🙈

I can't believe how much it varies between each trust. I think Oxfordshire needs to catch up with everyone else!

@blodyn91ngood god no your MIL is mental! Do not have a party at your house with a newborn!

@blodyn91 I hope you don't mind me asking but re your low BMI, do you have consultant care?

Mines on the border but as it's slightly over underweight (god knows what it is now as I'm so far gone!) I'm midwife led which is good! But because the midwives mention my frame every time I visit them it makes me more conscious. They weren't 100% sure whether to put me on consultant care initially so it's in the back of my mind.

They measured my bump last time and said it was fine even though the measurement was quite low as they had taken my bmi into account. I just can't remember when they weighed me and I lost weight due to HG at the beginning.

Have you been receiving similar comments like your bump is small etc? I'd like to mention I've had no extra growth scans but again every time I go to the midwives they ask me whether I've had any extra scans!