Thread 2 for us classed as more mature pregnant ladies

[AliasGrape]

Hi everyone.
I noticed our thread was about to fill up, so thought I’d start a new one quick. Hope that’s not too presumptuous of me and have to say thank you to @Sheera1 for starting the thread.

As the title says it’s a discussion thread for any pregnant women who are classed as that bit older for a mum to be.

Copying our list over so we can keep up. If you would like to join please copy and paste the list, adding your own details in date order.

Really hope I’m doing this right! 🙈

@Liveforholidays 40. Due 01/06/20 - Baby boy born 4th June 💙
@Ethellsmum 38. Due July DC5
@fool11 45, due July, DC2
@PregnantPorcupine, 38, due 29/07/20 DC1
@AliasGrape 40 Due 30/07/20 DC1
@stairgates Age 43 Due 5/08/20 DC12
@Dufferedup 42. Due Sep DC3
@Realladymarmalade Age? Due:29/08/20 DC (darling child)?
@Ferrylass 45. Due Oct? DC2
@3isthemagicnumber3 40. Due 16/10/20 DC3
@Brightonmaman 41. Due 19 Oct DC2
@LittleMiss7 38. Due 20/10/20 DC1&2.. TWINS!
@crispaddict99 40. Due 9/11/20 DC1
@Sheera1 41. Due 20/11/20 ds10
@onlyreadingneverposting8 44. Due 24/11/20 DC (darling child)?
@Frazzlerock age 41. Due 26/11/20 DC3 - 7th pregnancy
@EveningReflection 38. Due 04/12/2020 DC1
@MariaDingbat 40. Due 07/12/20 & FTM dc3
@AuntLucy 44. Due Dec
@passthemustard Age? Due Dec DC5
@sunlight81 Age? Due Dec DC2 & 3 TWINS!
@countingblessings 40 Due 19/12/20 DC2
@LJEva 42. Due 25/12/20 DC2
@Shroppy 38 Due 31/12/20 DC1
@Kiffers 42, due 01.01.21 - first child
@Liese27 38 Due 9/01/21 DC2
@footprintsintheslow 40 Due 10/01/21 dC3
@pinklillie 39. Due Jan DC1
@sk283 40. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@Antihop 42. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@mlctobe 41. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@Dia1212 40. Due 21/01/21 DC1
@Mummymilla Age? Due 24/01/21 DC3
@Viennoise 38. Due 26/01/21
@Louscarlet 39 due 30/01/21 DC1
@Celibacydidntwork 46 Due 31/1/21 DC3

Is anyone having a baby shower? It's my third and at this age I'm just thinking don't want a fuss. Equally I'd like to mark my mat leave in some way as been wfh and so isolated and none of the usual rituals of starting mat leave are happening . Thinking of having my 3 female colleagues around in the garden.

I'm also not into these InstagramOTT baby showers .
At my ripe old age I'd be happy with markies afternoon tea and cakes and be done with it !

@Realladymarmalade no baby shower for me...9th baby and never had one yet...Mainly because I don't have anyone to throw me one! To quote my Mum after I had my 4th baby and was upset at no one (not even family congratulating me) "no one cares when it's your 4th....it's not important"....she said to her 4th child! (She's a history of that type of comment!) 😳🤗

I'm very glad I don't have to work and can pace myself!! I wouldn't have managed it over the last few months!

Glad I'm not the only one up early - I've had a sleepless night with feeling unwell and my arm from my vaccine yesterday hurting so much it's kept me awake - I also sleep on that side but that made it hurt more! 😢 Once I've eaten I'm going to take painkillers! Seems ridiculous for a little jab!!

No baby shower for me either.

I don't like the whole baby shower concept at all. It wasn't a thing when I had my boys 15 and 11 years ago. I just find them really tacky and grabby.
I think a few close friends to meet up with before the big day is nice though, maybe a coffee somewhere and absolutely no presents.
Same for the 'gender reveal' parties. 1. you can't tell the gender until they're old enough to decide. It's 'sex' goddammit! and 2. its just a no
Haha. I'm a moody opinionated one aren't I I do like fun things honest! Just not those two things as they make me shudder

How's everyone today?

@onlyreadingneverposting8 yeah it is really uncomfortable isn't it!
It won't last too long though. I think it took 2 or 3 days for it to pass.

Has anyone heard of Peanut? Its an app for meeting other parents (well mums really as I don't think dads can join) locally to you.
A colleague suggested it as we're not doing NCT so wanted to meet other local parents who are due around the same time as us. It's terribly cringey and very much like Tinder but for friends as there is a swipe feature. It also uses teeth itchingly phrases like ''fashion killa' and 'always on vacay' when adding your interests but if you can get past that, it is pretty good. Been chatting to a couple of locals the past few days due in Nov.

Ah I'm kinda the same on the baby showers @Frazzlerock. I've been to a couple and I didnt enjoy the games (like trying to guess what smell was coming from a nappy?!) But also I think I'm maybe a wee bit superstitious in that I felt awkward giving presents for a baby that wasnt safely here yet? I had an afternoon tea meet up with some friends before my 1st - no presents or balloons or banners - and it was lovely so would be up for a wee thing like that but probably unlikely in these times!!

I've seen Peanut advertised and was going to have a look. Not sure if I could deal with they swipey thing though. What if nobody wants to talk to me I met some lovely friends through pregnancy and baby classes last time but done nothing this time round. Need to give some online stuff a go. Might help me finally wrap my head around being pregnant!!

Give it a go @Countingblessings I messaged about 3 women and 2 have got back to me - sometimes feels a little desperate but I think it'll be worth it. I quite like the idea of spending mat leave with other women and babies local to me. Even if it is socially distanced meet ups. There are also forums on there. But they are a bit netmumsy tbh.

For those of you over 40 in this group have you been told that they won't let you go over your due date? I'm sure I read this was usual practice if you were over 40 but my midwife hasn't mentioned it. Appreciate there may be other reasons why they won't let you go over but this is more that if there isn't any other problems or concerns that this would be the case.

@NaomiB79 I don't know about normal births. I'm having a section a week early (at least) but hopefully one of the others can answer your question!

I think general protocol now is to induce at due date for the over 40s rather than the usual 10/12 days late.

They have booked my induction for the day of my due date due to age, so hopefully 5th August should be it :)

@NaomiB79 I asked about this at my last appointment and the midwife was inside but went an asked her colleague who 'knows everything'.
She said that they follow NICE guidelines and no where is it black and white. It would all depend on individual circumstances. At 37 I went two weeks over after many sweeps and still nothing was happening. This time they said they'd probably not let me go that far now I'm 40.

I'm happy to be induced as was last time and it was the easier birth of the two I'd had.

Hi. Is anyone getting it have experience of a nursing chair? I was thinking of getting a 2nd hand one but they look quite narrow for us larger ladies. I have an ikea poang chair and there is a day bed in that room, however, both are quite awkward to get up from easily so with a baby and also with a c section I think I need to get something that had a higher seat and more upright back that is easier to stand up from.

Any ideas/comments?

@Sheera1 we bought a nursing chair with rocking footstool when we were expecting our 3rd little one about 2 years ago and we use it quite a lot for relaxing in, but obviously still not tried it with a baby. It is so comfy though! It was second hand and very good condition. I don't know the brand but its spacious enough I think. This is the one:

This one. I wanted to change the colour of the fabric but not sure how yet? I might dye the covers as they're easily removable

That is lovely. I have seen a similar one that is only £50 with the footstool which is a great price, but I remember trying one in Mothercare years ago and thinking it was really snug for my size and so not comfy. I am hovering over this other chair as it is reasonably priced at £65 and looks quite supportive. Is it hideous?

I think I'd prefer a rocking one @Sheera1 but it does look very comfy and supportive

@Frazzlerock I'm going for this one from Wayfair I'll uses feeding pillow too.

I'm due to be induced on my EDD. I am happy for that to be the case. My other two arrived on or the day before their due date. I'm hoping the preceding weeks sweep will do the job anyway.

Thanks everyone for the responses about not going over your due date, seems to be pretty consistent in that they won't let you go much over if you are over 40.

Hello ladies
@NaomiB79 I've been told that they advise induction for women over 40 and that would be their plan for me as I'm 41.

I do feel in two minds as I want to have a natural birth but I also want to know my baby is safe. I spoke to the midwife about it yesterday and she told me to go away and read up on it and ask them to discuss their reasoning for it.

I'm
Not having a babu shower either, I feel they are a bit tacky!

@NaomiB79 I had a chair very similar for DS. It was an ikea tub chair and it worked great for breastfeeding tbh. Don't have it anymore. Though.

@Frazzlerock DP decided he hated the wingback one so I got the proper nursing glider and footstool for £50. If it doesn't work out I should def be able to sell that on for the same price and get something else.

I like the glider chairs.

I'm unlikely to be breastfeeding beyond 2 weeks. Sadly my body just is not built to feed and I have issues with lactose production and flat nipples.
Its unlikely to have changed so I'm gearing up for a bottle fed baby. Still good to have a nice chair though , might have a wee look myself. I managed to 3 months with my son but it was a huge struggle & couldn't with my daughter beyond 2 weeks. I've made peace with it and I'm not arsed.

Is anyone else planning to bottle feed ?

I do want a chair this time but I'm worried the gliders or rockers will be dangerous for my two year olds little fingers. I was thinking of a poang from Ikea with a stool and a miniature one for my daughter.

Morning all, I’ve been awake since 4 Have been for the last few mornings actually so I’m totally useless in the day!

@NaomiB79 I was told from my booking in appointment I’d be induced from 39 weeks. I’ve been quite unhappy about it and was going to put up a bit more resistance but then at my last growth scan she said the growth had slowed a tiny bit - nothing to worry about but it seemed to add more weight to the induction argument so I’ve decided to accept one for 2 days before my due date. I’m still not thrilled about it - rules out using the MLU, makes birth pool unlikely, increases likelihood of needing instrumental delivery or a section and was just not what I wanted at all really. I still feel a bit like I’ve been railroaded into it and when you look at the reasoning it’s quite slim and the alternative could be increased monitoring. Having said that - I’m making my peace with it now. It’s nice to know a date when things will at least get started and has made organising DH’s leave quite straightforward. I’m hoping we don’t end up needing the drip as that’s the bit I’m most uncomfortable about - but if we do then we do.

I like the look of the glider chairs unfortunately we’ve no space for anything like that here :( I’ve got a feeding pillow. I now have two rooms in the house I’m quite delighted with, the lounge and our bedroom (where baby will be for the foreseeable) so even though the rest of the house has a long way to go I’m taking those two as a win and ignoring the rest!

We’ve set the bedside crib up, it made me quite emotional I never thought it would happen for us. I also STILL feel a bit superstitious about it like it’s ‘tempting fate’ and we should have waited - even though I’m 38 weeks today and about to be induced in just over a week.

No baby shower here either. Not too arsed about that but do feel a little bit sad about missing out on lots of pregnancy things - my aquanatal classes and yoga were all cancelled, have barely seen any friends whilst pregnant, nobody has felt my bump or whatever. No wandering round the shops trying out prams or buying baby clothes etc it’s all been online. No antenatal classes and haven’t met any other local mums. Just not really the experience I was envisioning after waiting so long, but then I don’t suppose anyone ever gets quite the experience they pictured! And they’re minor things really, that no doubt will pale into insignificance once I get my baby into my arms!