Thread 2 for us classed as more mature pregnant ladies

[AliasGrape]

Hi everyone.
I noticed our thread was about to fill up, so thought I’d start a new one quick. Hope that’s not too presumptuous of me and have to say thank you to @Sheera1 for starting the thread.

As the title says it’s a discussion thread for any pregnant women who are classed as that bit older for a mum to be.

Copying our list over so we can keep up. If you would like to join please copy and paste the list, adding your own details in date order.

Really hope I’m doing this right! 🙈

@Liveforholidays 40. Due 01/06/20 - Baby boy born 4th June 💙
@Ethellsmum 38. Due July DC5
@fool11 45, due July, DC2
@PregnantPorcupine, 38, due 29/07/20 DC1
@AliasGrape 40 Due 30/07/20 DC1
@stairgates Age 43 Due 5/08/20 DC12
@Dufferedup 42. Due Sep DC3
@Realladymarmalade Age? Due:29/08/20 DC (darling child)?
@Ferrylass 45. Due Oct? DC2
@3isthemagicnumber3 40. Due 16/10/20 DC3
@Brightonmaman 41. Due 19 Oct DC2
@LittleMiss7 38. Due 20/10/20 DC1&2.. TWINS!
@crispaddict99 40. Due 9/11/20 DC1
@Sheera1 41. Due 20/11/20 ds10
@onlyreadingneverposting8 44. Due 24/11/20 DC (darling child)?
@Frazzlerock age 41. Due 26/11/20 DC3 - 7th pregnancy
@EveningReflection 38. Due 04/12/2020 DC1
@MariaDingbat 40. Due 07/12/20 & FTM dc3
@AuntLucy 44. Due Dec
@passthemustard Age? Due Dec DC5
@sunlight81 Age? Due Dec DC2 & 3 TWINS!
@countingblessings 40 Due 19/12/20 DC2
@LJEva 42. Due 25/12/20 DC2
@Shroppy 38 Due 31/12/20 DC1
@Kiffers 42, due 01.01.21 - first child
@Liese27 38 Due 9/01/21 DC2
@footprintsintheslow 40 Due 10/01/21 dC3
@pinklillie 39. Due Jan DC1
@sk283 40. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@Antihop 42. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@mlctobe 41. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@Dia1212 40. Due 21/01/21 DC1
@Mummymilla Age? Due 24/01/21 DC3
@Viennoise 38. Due 26/01/21
@Louscarlet 39 due 30/01/21 DC1
@Celibacydidntwork 46 Due 31/1/21 DC3

Sheera - same happened to me! Hermes delivery was scheduled for when I was out but they left it on my doorstep in the pouring rain. I live in a new build so the doorstep is 2 meters from the footpath. Pic of pram all over the box. Was tempting to say it had been stolen but that's mail fraud so...

Got my sweep tomorrow but just had a rummage and can't even find my cervix so I'm not overly hopeful the midwife will be able to do it.

@Frazzlerock it really is gorgeous and I've used it a lot more than the previous owner. I walk everywhere so I wanted something substantial and with a MASSIVE shopping basket. I'll be sad when it has to go

Ooh I'd be raging about that too sheera !

duffered ...you had a rummage 🤣 love it.
Good luck tomorrow. I'm going to follow suit and ask my mw to do it thursday .

Up tonight with high anxiety and panic about, the labour, the baby , whether I will manage 3 DC, whether dp and I are right together , whether I should just have kept on to my little house and single mummy life. In the last 4 years I've separated (traumatic )met new dp , sold and bought a n house, set up a business , and like us all got pregnant in a pandemic.i suddenly feel utterly terrified. I know its anxiety talking but I do wonder if any of you in the same boat feel like this ?

@Realladymarmalade I think it's common to feel anxious during pregnancy, especially as you are so close to the birth and with everything that's gone on with Covid these past few months.

I've had a similar journey to yours the past four years (although I had no children from my previous relationship) and have found myself questioning my choices and wondering "what if" quite often during my pregnancy. I honestly think it's got a lot to do with hormones raging as well anxiety and once the babies are here and our hormones have settled down you'll feel more calm and peaceful about things

Thank you naomi that means a lot and also appreciate the speedy response
Dp is fast asleep beside me and been feeling overwhelmed with thoughts. It is really helpful to know I am not alone in this. I do think the pandemic amplifies everything.
I am very aware that with my previous relationship it was the beginning of the end when I got pregnant too. But as you say even without all of that it's a trying time emotionally and a huge adjustment..

Hope you are ok . When are you due ?

@Realladymarmalade no worries that's why this group is so good as you often find others are experiencing the same thing as you and you aren't alone in how you are feeling.

I've still got 12.5 weeks til my due date so still a while away, although I am getting more anxious about it as it gets closer.

Good luck this week, hope your sweep goes well if they do it for you soon, we'll all be hoping for a quick and straightforward birth for you xx

@dufferedup Ooh raging. What is wrong with them? Dpd are normally good. I keep getting g messages saying my parcel is being delivered today like I wanted it but I already have it. I think as it was 3 massive boxes he wanted it out his van. Grrr.

I really feel like I overdid things yesterday and feel really woozy today. A friend came over this morning and while talking to her got very nauseated and was retching and almost sick in the sink? What is that about??? I hadn't eaten yet so maybe needing to eat made me want to puke? Still feel woozy now though.

@realmarmalade. I am right with you on those thoughts. Our story is so similar expect left my husband 8 years ago now. Tbh things were not good before ds and he was conceived on a one time in 6 months trying to sort relationship sex.

I worry babies exploit so many weaknesses in relationships too and I worry DP isn't up to it. It is his first and last baby! With me anyway! 🤦‍♀️. He has a bad relationship with alcohol and it caused so major issues early on in the pregnancy to the point I told him to leave! He has been sober for the last two months so pulled his finger out, but I worry about it and him a little. He is so I to this baby though but he has no clue on the work.

I had a freak out about feeding and doing ti all again. I don't think I coped well with DS but everyone thought I did. I breastfed but ran myself into the ground so though I want to breastfeed again if all works, I want to introduce a bottle v early but then reading here and reminding myself how tough it is I am panicking I am forgetting how hard and that I might end up attached to baby and expressing which I don't want to do again but then might confuse him/her with bottles. Arrgh. Good to talk about it all on here. I am so use to having DS as my wee companion and he is so easy these days. I worry about that once baby is here too.

@NaomiB79 we are due around the same time. I have 13 weeks till a section. Is seems ages away and yet not far away at all! In some ways I want the baby here asap as I am worrying a bit age and weight and losing the baby late on. I am worried about dying at my c section courtesy of my aunt freaking me out and yet I also want to hit pause and not ready for baby!

@Sheera1 we are due about the same time, I'm 13th Nov. I've not had it confirmed if they will induce me early or anything yet but will start asking the midwife. I was classed as higher risk because of my age and weight at the start but apart from some bleeding early on everything has gone pretty smoothly up until now.

I do get really anxious about the birth and the run up to it also, this really is my only chance to have a baby and I am terrified something will go wrong but just need to stay positive and tell myself the chances of something going wrong now are pretty slim!

Hope you are relaxing as much as possible and can enjoy the rest of your pregnancy without too much stress x

Well today confirmed the uselesness of my community midwife! Luckily I've only had to see her 3 times as she's been away a lot but she very scientifically described the baby's head as being 'well down' when I asked if it was engaged, my cervix was apparenlty 'open a tiny bit' and 'quite thick'. She managed to do the sweep but I can't have the second one I was supposed to have next week as she has no appointments left. On the plus side, she did book in my induction for 29th.

duffered I don't think you ever get a straight answer on whether baby engaged. I'm sure there was a time when you'd get a measurement or number back in the day !

Fingers crossed something will happen for you.
What sort if induction are you getting ? I'm getting the balloon on.the 29th..🎈🤣

I have my mw appt Thursday . I will be asking for a sweep , then expecting one the following week , 24th. I'm told she has put an appt aside...

sheera thank you for sharing your story also. 100% agree about the fault lines being exposed in that first year..its good though that hes sorted the drinking out.
I'm the same with my son. We are extremely close (and my daughter) . I really worry about his our civilised family life is going to be thrown into chaos. 🤯🤯🤯. Always apppreciate these very honest discussions ladies . Let's face it - benefit of being mature = a lot of collective wisdom..

Hmm, so I've been losing my mucas plug over the last day or so following the sweep. No contractions though so not convinced it means anything is happening.

Good luck getting your sweep today Realladymarmalade.

@DufferedUp oooh that sounds promising!
FWIW, I didn't have any contractions until I went into hospital. I don't remember losing my mucus plug but my waters went with an almighty whoosh! But no contractions whatsoever until I was induced later that day. So it still could be imminent!

Good luck today @Realladymarmalade

Ooh exciting @dufferedup! Won't be long now.

Good luck today @realladymarmalade

Anyone else around 27 weeks and just shattered this week? Wonder if I actually have a wee bug or something. Throat is sore this morning and was a struggle to get up. To be fair I am juggling being pregnant, keeping the household as DP is working away this week and the first full week of home educating DS oh and almost forgot working fulltime too 🤦‍♀️. Work has been really quiet this week though and taking lots of breaks! I am just hoping that isn't me feeling like this for the next 12-13 weeks.

Xxx

@Sheera1 I'm 28 weeks tomorrow and been shattered this week. I've had to have a sleep between 5pm and 7pm most nights and also a 20-30 min nap at lunchtime when I've been able to fit it in. My work has been really busy this week, yesterday at 3pm I wasn't sure I was going to make it to 5pm I was so tired! I've been really tired most of my pregnancy to be honest but defo seems bad this week, like you I hope it's not like this til the end x

Hi, hope everyone is ok..must admit I struggle to find time to read all the posts..just been so busy..still struggling with the BF, expressing etc..and got mastitis a week ago so feeling crap. Just want to ask how you ladies manage everyday things..I feel like I have no time for anything. My husband is helping with everything but just don’t u understand how you manage to BF, which can take over an hour, sort yourself out like have shower, breakfast, especially if you need to hold baby after feeding so he doesn’t puke, feed another child, older sibling and sort them out like getting changed , breakfast etc..how do you manage it all? I’m obviously not doing something right..haven’t had shower in 2days, feel like I’m constantly feeding, expressing, holding baby, washing the bottles and then it starts again..

@Sheera1 I've started to feel sluggish again too, that started last week at 25 weeks. I think it is third trimester tiredness!

Sounds like you've a lot going on so no wonder you're tired.
Thankfully schools down here don't go back until 1st Sept so we've a couple more weeks of chill time. I'm so nervous about them going back to school. Feel like they should really, especially as its DS2's first year at secondary school. I don't want him joining later on when all the children have already formed friendship groups.

Talking of trimesters, I'm confused about when 3rd tri starts. My book says it started last week (25) but if I google it says it starts at 28 weeks?

@fool11 ahhh sounds exhausting! I seem to remember it gets easier though . How much is your DP/DH doing?

He is good, does all the washing, hoovering , cleaning house, cooking dinner, shopping, clearing up, helping with my daughter, so can’t complain, he does more than many other men ..that’s why I’m not sure how I manage without his help ..just feels like I’m falling, don’t know how women manage on their own..or do they let just babies cry etc?

Hello duffered my due date twin..good re the mucous plug..

I've had a sweep today as well. Feel nothing much different just tired and back /bump.pain..she said I'm 1cm dilated and 3/5 engaged . Baby went nuts after getting his head tickled and felt quite emoshe :) .
Watch this space
Sweep number 2 next Tuesday ..

fool ...I have probably forgotten - I went thru the first few weeks post dc3 in a sleep deprived daze. BFing and expressing is extremely exhausting too.
I used to have DP hold baby after feed so could shower . Or I would sit baby on a baby swing beside the bathroom with the door open and have a quick shower . So important to make time for thay shower psychologically. How old are your other kids?

The first 6 weeks are hellish hard but gets easier . Xxx

@fool11 I don't know. I was a single parent for 6 years but I found it easier than having ex-h around who was like a 3rd child! You just get on with things I think. But I've not done it with a newborn.
You will get into a pattern that fits, it just takes time to get there. Not sure if a sling/wrap would be helpful to give you hands free time? You may already have one.

@Sheera1 26+2 here. Tbh I've been feeling pretty exhausted since 5 weeks! Still not really any let up in the nausea and I have zero appetite. I eat because I feel sick not because of hunger. There are fewer and fewer things I fancy eating too - think I'm down to about 4 things now. This happened with my 5th who I was also very sick with and was also a girl! Any back to the exhaustion - youngest and pet dogs have been giving me and the husband a good lesson in newborn behaviour this week. The dogs got a bug and were up and down in the night wanting to go out. Youngest has had some very funny nights - not going to sleep and one where he fell asleep at 7, had a 2.5ht "nap" and was up til 4am. Then he's come down with a virus (woke with a high temp no other symptoms) too - we've had to do a covid year and are waiting for the results. Got a bit scared thinking about the covid implications when pregnant but we live in a low infection rate area so likely it is not covid anyway!!

@Frazzlerock I always thought that 3rd tri started at 28weeks but then I read in the "Emma's diary" thingy you get free "week 27 - now you're into the 3rd trimester?!" so I was going to ask the same too!!

@fool11 I think we all just forget how time consuming a newborn is!! It'll get easier! I always work on the "reasonably" so house "reasonably clean and tidy" (toys on floor don't count). It doesn't matter if the meals aren't cooked from scratch or home made for a few weeks or if it's beans on toast 3 nights running. No one will die!! Actually the opposite it teaches everyone to be more adaptable, independent, tolerant, forgiving etc etc

Thanks ladies..I’m sure things eventually will settle..might be just the tiredness, sleep deprivation, mastitis doesnt help plus constant BF..or might be just hormones..I watch 5 min of tinker bell with my dd yesterday and cried 😂...must b hormones. My daughter is 5, so still needs attention etc..

I had the 20 week scan and everything is fine and healthy. Such a bloody relief as our 20 week scan was where we had the worst news last time.

We did ask not be told the sex and the sonography right accidentally said "he" twice. I don't blame her at all as it must be very difficult once you've seen what you can't under. Plus when she gave us the photo I think the writing is on the wall😂.

I'm kicking myself now as I was too polite to ask her either way as I didn't want to highlight her slip up.

What does everyone think? Boy?