Pregnancy after miscarriage - invaluable support and friendship

[becklespeckle]

Healthy and well

Not doing a 20 week scan is insane as it shows the position of the plcenta which if to low can be dangerous and you won't know if the baby has any birth defects that could be repaired at early stages.

Goingfor3 ? poor you it was so awful that both the stitch and the measles happened at the same time, it must be so hard to know what led to your loss it must be a really hard choice for you, especially as stitches have been a success for you in the past. Regular scans sound helpful but how late can you opt for a stitch if things are looking dodgy? And how much notice would you get if your cervix did start to open, is it a gradual thing? Everything crossed for you hon. I?m glad you feel that you are being looked after, it really helps to feel reassured, I have been so lucky too with the care that I am getting xx Totally agree with you on the 20 week scan points. Though I was told at my private nuchal that the placenta was posterior.

Gingercat ? I?m in Scotland and that is correct, the only scan you get as standard up here is the dating scan. It is a disgrace and lots of ladies I know have lobbied their MPs about it as the British guidelines say that all women should be offered a 20 week scan I believe. Lots of people I know have private ones for peace of mind but it is expensive. Add to that the fact that there are no nuchal scans as standard and all you are offered in terms of testing is the double test which is notoriously unreliable ? it?s a recipe for lots of anxious Mums I?ll get off my soap box now. I was lucky to be given a 20 week scan but that is because I am under consultant care. It is a postcode lottery.

Mich10 ? peace of mind is always a great thing we paid for a private nuchal scan at 12 weeks. At HealthcareNow in Edinburgh. It was £195 but worth every penny. Our dating scan wasn?t until 14 weeks and though I?d had an 8 week scan, I?d had a bleed and was desperate to know that everything was ok plus we got far more precise testing results than we would have if we?d had the double test. Where in Scotland are you from?

Yes I now have hallowe'ened my name

Mich10 - Welcome! What hospital did you go to? I went to Sunderland Royal when I started bleeding and had an internal scan - they did try externally but at 9 weeks I needed a full bladder. The baby had already died .
However in this pg, I also had a scan at 9 weeks, this time at Hartlepool. Again same problem, bladder wasn't full, so they couldn't see anything on the external scan, so had an internal scan instead. I'm now coming upto 30 weeks. So I can honestly say I don't think having the internal scan caused your m/c. The probe hardly goes in IIRC!

Ronshar - if no pain, it's still hopeful. When will you be scanned?

Bouncingturtleskulls - I also ended up at Sunderland Royal for the internals. Realistically I know what you say is true but that doesn't stop me breaking out in a cold sweat at the thought of doing it again. Thanks for trying though.

MrsMcSpooky - I'm originally an East Kilbride girl, South Side of Glasgow on and off over the past 10 years and currently North of England Suburbia. A real culture shock, lovely people but not a decent Pub or Restaurant within walking distance of my house. Not that the Pub bit is an issue now!

I'm originlly from HK (ex pt Scottish military of several generations) though lived in Spain from age 10. I came to Uni in Edinburgh in '92 and stayed. DH and I live in West Lothian at the mo (trying to sell up for a move back to Spain next year) and we both work in Edinburgh. I worked in Glasgow for 3 years great bars and resturants and shops , it's not quite like that here in Whitburn!

Just popping into say a quick hello.

Hey, Ronshar, sorry to hear what is going on with you When I was worried about pains (although no bleeding) I went to my EPU and had a scan at 5+4. There was no h/beat then, but the doc reassured me simply from knowing that all was where it should be, and looked the corrct size. But I can imagine that if I was having bleeding, that info would not have been any reassurance to me atall. I so hope this works out for you.

Goingfor3, sounds like a really crappy decision you have on your hands there.....

Hope all is well with everyone else.

xx

mitch - im in sunderland, with my mc i had a internal scan with that epau. with this pregnancy they didnt offer me a early scan so ie one had a private one at the RVI £90 but worth every penny for the reasurance. how many weeks are you? you could ring and ask if they will do an externall scan.

I was told North Tees don't do reassurance scans but I pushed for one at my booking in appointment - basically said that I was already under a great of stress at work, and was terrified that I would lose this baby - my m/c was after my first attempt to conceive. Plus I was going away on holiday when I was 9 weeks pg and I couldn't bear the thought of going to Spain and then miscarrying while I was out there, especially as I was visiting my family. So eventually they got me a scan appointment booked for the day before we flew. Really glad I did it, when I arrived in Spain I found out my Grandma was seriously ill in hospital (so yet more stress!) but at least I wasn't worrying about the baby! Only thing was, I wasn't permitted to see her as she had caught a bug which meant that the docs wouldn't allow me near her Happily on the last day she had recovered enough for me to go visit which made her very happy

Morning ladies -

grrrr, it really annoys me how EPU policy varies from region to region. Lesley Regan states v. clearly in her book that they've proven at St Mary's that a little TLC (i.e reassurance scans, someone to talk to when you need it etc) can significantly decrease m/c rates. Why aren't all women being offered it then??!!!!!!

Here in Fife, you get the direct number of the EPU as soon as you've had one m/c and you can ring up and have a scan every fortnight from 6 weeks if you want. I chose to wait till 8 weeks for my first scan as I really don't like internals, find them v. stressful and hopefully by 8 weeks, Bean will be visible on external scan.

5+5 today, time stretches before me like a neverending steep up-hill road...!

Ronshar thinking of you

BB x

Not that long Basil hon keep positive!!

Basil - I agree, not just on the reassurance scan but also most NHS trusts either don't offer nuchal fold scans or charge you for them at varying rates. Plus I believe some Trusts don't offer a 12 week dating scan or a 20 week anomoly scan either! Utterly barmy!
Hey MrsMc - had a good weekend?
BTW went swimming for the first time in ages... bliss! Am now 30 weeks, and feeling the strain & pain of baby so it was nice to feel weightless! Tough getting out though!

Hey Basil, I should be 5+4 today.
I might still be pregnant as bleeding has almost completely stopped and I havent passed anything big enough or in enough quantity (sorry) for it to have been a MC. Obviously it could be the beginnings.
I am off to the quack later to see what she can offer me. If not I shall demand.
I hope everyone else has had an uneventful weekend.

Hi, just a quick one as I'm in the office today and I'm willing to bet this isn't what they pay me for.

Spug's I'm only 5 weeks at the moment so very early days. However I am going to push for an early scan and if I have to pay to get one. I will end up paying for a scan anyway as I'm an older first time mother so I'm going to go for the best tests I can afford

Ronshar - I'm glad to hear that the bleeding has stopped and my fingers are crossed for your appointment today.

Basilbrush - The care in Fife sounds great but I don't think I can talk my husband into the move. I am jealous though, it would be great just to know you could even if you hopefully never feel the need.

MrsMcSpooky - Are you still in your halloween
costume? Whereabouts in Spain are you thinking of moving to? I've never lived in Spain but I used to run pub's in Gran Canaria in a former life.

Ronshar we all will be thinking of you. I hope you will get an early scan. Can you take somebody with you that sometimes helps. In the worst case, could you get a private scan? The waiting is agonizing and we think of you.

Thank you Glimmer. Was it you that MrsMcJnr was refering to before? Did you have a big bleed early in your pregnancy? Sorry if not you or brings back difficult memories.

Hi ya
just popping in to say hi, and wish all you lovely ladies strong happy vibes.

I hope you are all well, and take a few moments each day to enjoy your lovely babies being on the inside. You probably won't believe me but you will miss being pg. It really is the most special thing.

LL is doing well, sucking his hand madly right now. first vaccination tomorrow though.

Ronshar- best wishes to you, thinking sticky vibes for you

Hello all, how is everyone? Welcome to all newbies on here, hope your pgs are very uneventful this time.
Ronshar, so sorry about the rough time you are having hun, fingers crossed that your little beanie is hanging in there! If it is any reassurance for you, there is a lady on my Dec thread who lost loads and loads of blood and clots etc early in her pregnancy - more than once in fact - and she is now over 30 weeks and doing well! Good luck at the Docs too.
Uki, glad LL is doing well! How are you? Time is flying isn't it, can't believe he is old enough for his first vaccination already!
Sorry have not had time to catch up properly, was so busy last week with work (seems to have turned into a full time job at the moment) that I didn't have time to MN!!! Can't wait for maternity leave now! (7 weeks and counting) There is a new girl starting in a couple of weeks which should take some of the pressure off of me as I have been doing my job and bits of hers too. Although it is working from home it gives me no time for anything else and I am getting very stiff sitting in front of the computer all day! Had a visit from the Health Visitor last week and she told me off as she said I am doing too much, scared me a bit as she told me I could end up having the baby early if I didn't start getting a bit more rest.

Hey Bouncing ? DH was a drunken pain for most of Fri and Sat but otherwise, had a quiet weekend! My baby is due 3 months today (by date) why does the 9 months feel like so much longer? I should take your lead and do some exercise, I?m sure I?d feel better. 30 weeks hey ? Fab!!!

Ronshar ? that sounds positive that the bleeding has stopped everything crossed for you Glimmer and I met earlier on in the year after I?d had a big bleed with a baby I did subsequently lose, I would speedily say though that I?ve also had a bleed though not as big this pregnancy and it really does go both ways. Chin up hon

Mich10 ? pah! I spend so much of my day on MN I?m a bad girl oh yes, Halloween costume now until 1/11! Then Guy Fawkes.. god I?m sad we?re moving to the South coast, near Malaga

Hey Uki DS sounds so lovely hope the jags go ok.

Hello Beckle ? 7 weeks of work to go I have 9 on Friday!! Please, please get some rest

Hi ronshar - hope you get a scan. If it is any hlep. I phoned the MW direct and they put me straight through to EPU on the phone. Thye then told me to come in that day.

Yes, Ronshar I bled almost every day between week 5 and 9. As I posted below (maybe too abbreaviated) I had everything from red to brown bleeds and almost every day. I was sure I would loose the baby but am 36 weeks today....While I bled steadily it was never a lot and I had no pains.
As MrsMcSpookey said: sometimes the bleeding is a bad sign and sometimes it isn't and it is pure agony not to know....I saw a heartbeat at a private scat at 6 weeks, which was somehwat reassuring. I had anther one at 8 weeks because of the bleeding and for me it was worth the money. But a lot of women feel that they might as well wait longer and then see -- it really depends on the individuum. I had also had some complications after the mc before, so I was defnitely quite worried.

Thinking of you.

Hey ronshar - hope your absence means you are having a scan and all is well....

mitch - which hospital are oyu at? sunderland doesnt do nucual scans but the rvi does, if you choose the rvi as your hospital its free if not then its £150. i dont know if you get it free if your older and sunderland pick up the bill but i know that durham does (if that makes any sense) just incase your intereasted

Nope no scan. The EPU seem to be delibrately mis-understanding the problem. I got dates a bit wrong so I am actually 5+1. Even so. The doctor was lovely but no real help. I went to have some bloods taken and have to have more on Wednesday!
We will see.

Hon, I'm sorry that you didn't get any joy but that's probably too early to scan. Don't let the blood results freak you out too much, my EPU don't do them because they can be misleading. Hang in there hon xx