Due August 2020 Thread 3

[cannotmakemymindup]

Hi ladies new thread for all us August Due! Now on thread 3. Newbies always welcome.

Thank you @Bubblesbebe that’s reassuring. His abdominal circumference was on the larger side at the 20 week scan but nobody seemed concerned as it was still well within the normal range. I had a private scan at 27+5 and when they measured his abdominal circumference then it was much more average. I’m hoping that yesterday he just needed to wee or something.

@Firstmummytobe I will definitely query it with them when I go back for a rescan if he is still measuring big and if the GD test is negative.
I hope you manage to get some rest, you must have so much on your mind 💕

@Lottie37 you’ve still got plenty of time for baby to turn so I would try not to worry yet. I’ve seen a website called spinning babies recommend a lot for getting babies to turn.

@Liverpool20 it’s so hard to know what the right thing to do is but you need to do what you feel is best for you and your baby. Unfortunately family members will always have something to say about any choice you make. Grandparents seem to be the common difficulty in this situation 😄 My mum has said that she will be here to meet the baby even if it’s in full PPE. 🤷🏽‍♀️

Make sure you’re comfortable with whatever choice you make and don’t feel pressured. 💕

@Fig20 my scan at 32 weeks showed our little boy had a larger AC and weighing 5lb 2, was sent for a GD test and all came back clear. My midwife told me that either he’s big or had a full bladder but I am back in a couple of weeks for another scan to check all is well.
Fingers crossed for us both it’s nothing to worry about x

@Liverpool20 DH and I have agreed the same, that we will be careful about isolating in the last 2 weeks and then not have visitors for 2 weeks after the birth. Tbh for me it's more about them - both sets of parents are on the vulnerable (not shielding) list so I feel like we would be a risk to them, having just come out of the hospital. I am going to let my dad and his partner stay overnight when they visit, as they live a 4-5 hour drive away and are both 80, and have been very careful about not going out or seeing people throughout lockdown.

@Fig20 those were my mums exact words too about coming in full PPE.. and I know she would aswell 🤣😨

She's already cross that we have told her we are isolating for 2 weeks from next Wednesday as that takes us up to the Csection date- her reply was 'typical, when I've got a whole week off work I thought we could go shopping'. I really had to bite my tongue. I honestly do get she's longed for a grandchild for so long but we've got to put our little ones first - I would never forgive myself if anything happened for the sake of a cuddle.

At the minute we are thinking 7 days isolating after she's born and then letting grandparents hold her with a mask and having washed hands as long as they've been isolating/being very careful (ie not my brother going to the pub). The irony is my mum works in a care home, perhaps one of the riskiest places to be! I can see there being arguments 🥺 but need to remember we are doing the best for our little ones.

@BabyG08 it’s great that your test came back clear. Did you have to wait long for the results? Yes hopefully all will be well for us 💕 my friend had the same thing and it turned out to be nothing. They said the baby had probably just been drinking a lot of the fluid 🤷🏽‍♀️ At least they’re investigating it 😊

Managed to have an hour but back awake, I as a few of you said I think it’s because it’s 5 days away and the excitement is just keeping me awake😂🙈❤️

[quote heroineinahalfshell]@Liverpool20 DH and I have agreed the same, that we will be careful about isolating in the last 2 weeks and then not have visitors for 2 weeks after the birth. Tbh for me it's more about them - both sets of parents are on the vulnerable (not shielding) list so I feel like we would be a risk to them, having just come out of the hospital. I am going to let my dad and his partner stay overnight when they visit, as they live a 4-5 hour drive away and are both 80, and have been very careful about not going out or seeing people throughout lockdown.[/quote]
Arr yes I feel the same about people who have been as careful as we have but sadly not everyone has. She had suggested that they will wear masks and wash their hands but I’m definitely not comfortable with that as they have not been isolating at all. What a time to be giving birth!

Hello lovely pregnant ladies, I've been following these threads for ages but have been lacking the energy to actually write anything (working from home tech overload I think!) Hope you're all doing well, I'm due on the 8th with a girl :)

@Liverpool20 @heroineinahalfshell I've also been having so many thoughts about this, after being so strict and not being allowed at work etc it feels strange to see alot of people going back to 'normal', and like you, how careful my family members have been has varied massively.

My sister has literally lived between 3 houses, one of which has people round all the time. We are very close and she's so excited about the baby, she's asked me if I want her to isolate before the baby is here but I can't exactly tell people what to do and she's become a bit defensive about it. My mum has been working directly with covid positive patients and is stopping work 2 weeks before before due date. It's just so hard to know what to do, I imagined having people over when my partner is back at work to help out etc. And as we are a few weeks away still things may have changed by then anyway. Sorry for the long message, but the issue is really playing on my mind (especially in the middle of the night when I should he asleep!)

Xx

@Nellie3

Hello lovely pregnant ladies, I've been following these threads for ages but have been lacking the energy to actually write anything (working from home tech overload I think!) Hope you're all doing well, I'm due on the 8th with a girl :)

@Liverpool20 @heroineinahalfshell I've also been having so many thoughts about this, after being so strict and not being allowed at work etc it feels strange to see alot of people going back to 'normal', and like you, how careful my family members have been has varied massively.

My sister has literally lived between 3 houses, one of which has people round all the time. We are very close and she's so excited about the baby, she's asked me if I want her to isolate before the baby is here but I can't exactly tell people what to do and she's become a bit defensive about it. My mum has been working directly with covid positive patients and is stopping work 2 weeks before before due date. It's just so hard to know what to do, I imagined having people over when my partner is back at work to help out etc. And as we are a few weeks away still things may have changed by then anyway. Sorry for the long message, but the issue is really playing on my mind (especially in the middle of the night when I should he asleep!)

Xx

Im exactly the same, thinking and worrying about it all the time. The worst thing is that DH finds is really difficult to disappoint his mum so I’ll probably be facing hostility with him on the subject if she objects nearer to the time. Honestly just lock me away for the next 6 months and I’ll be happy

Morning ladies! Having full anxiety overload today. Think I was actually having mini anxiety attacks in my sleep last night too as kept waking up with my heart beating 90 mile a minute, shaking head to toe and dizzy. None of that this morning but I don't feel normal. Sorry this may be long but I need to vent it out, hope you don't mind?

It's not even baby related thankfully but I've arranged to go to a diner for dinner tonight with a couple of my friends that I've not seen since I told them I was pregnant. I'm so scared that I'm being stupid going out to eat when I'm pregnant and the rona is still going strong and 2 of the girls have been at work the entire time/one them has been on dates and goes between her flat & her parents house. One has been proper isolating/shielding as she has a heart condition so that's okay. And then I think the anxiety is ramping up because I've only seen the one with the heart condition the entirety of lockdown, so I'm scared of seeing the others even though they're my best friends and have been since we we started high school. I don't know what to do? Am I tempting fate by going out? Then on the other hand, I need to see them for my own mental health because I've been driving myself crazy.

@JMill13 only you can make the right judgement call for yourself in this situation. However, if it helps at all I have been out throughout my pregnancy, to the shops, visiting my mum & dad & sister (sister works in retail & worked the full time). I have recently started meeting my friends who are working in the COVID environment & I have been fine. I understand how anxious it can be, I had been anxious to begin with but as time got on I realised that the risk of transmission is honestly very low. My DP has also worked this full time out of the house, I reckon if I was going to get it I would of had it by now as I was working with COVID patients before pregnancy was classed as vulnerable. You have to do what’s right for you though ☺️

Same boat here - we've been so careful since March (I haven't been in a shop and only visiting my mum's house since they've been equally careful). MIL got really offended that we wouldn't come in to her house at the weekend (we were happy to chat in the garden) and started demanding to know if she'd ever get to see this baby

It's hard to know how far to take precautions: on one hand I keep seeing pregnant ladies about same stage on insta/fb who are getting hair done and eating out (which is fine if they're comfortable, and I am so tempted to get my eyebrows done!!) but I'm happy staying cautious for all the time we have left. To compound things my husband is a student nurse and going in to placement on a ward next week - he thinks I should go stay with my mum while he's working in hospital and he'll stop placement early to quarantine pre due date. I really don't want to have to be away from home (nesting!) and think it's a bit OTT but I just don't know! It's all a bit too stressful!
Sorry for long rant!

@Fig20 I recently had my 32 week growth scan and they said my baby’s abdo circumference is on the bigger side of normal. I had diabetes bloods at 28 weeks and they came back perfect but the consultant says I should still eat as if I was diabetic because this is most likely why his belly is big!!

Think the virus and lockdown is making us all a bit crazy. It's just so hard to know what to do. We've been seeing my mum, my dad and OH's parents/sister throughout (well since about May-ish) as they've been doing exactly the same as us, off work/wfh, walks with just each other and Tesco trips so it was safe enough that way but think it's just been so long since seeing anyone else my brain has gone into serious anxious mode, though it has always been social anxiety that I suffer so it makes sense. Getting my hair done next week as my hairdresser works from home/is my sisters friend so I think its safe enough plus I'm going to end up shaving my head if don't 😂 it's so thick the wavy curls keep matting/knotting together. Just a bit scared of getting life back to "normal" when baby's due in 6 and a half weeks.

It's so difficult to know what to do for the best. We have invited my parents round for a one off visit this weekend, I will be paying close attention to how well behaved they are!
We met two friends at the weekend for a picnic and a soggy walk. I felt more relaxed than I was expecting but I trust them to be sensible. I don't trust my parents to be sensible!
My partners parents are coming up for a weekend at the end of the month and at the end of my partners paternity leave but they have agreed to self isolate prior to coming. My parents aren't in a position to do this and would stretch the rules as much as they could.

I've been quite anxious too today, I had to have a lie down to settle myself. We are hoping to move some time early next year but since the possibility of a stamp duty holiday was proposed my partner wants to move sooner and put our house on the market in the next few weeks/months. I really don't want to deal with house viewings with a 4-6 week old baby. Partner says it will be fine I can take her for a walk during viewings. I think he is underestimating how difficult a newborn could be. I have a 50% chance of a postpartum mental health episode I want those first few months as stress free as possible to minimise the risks but not having to pay stamp duty would be a huge saving. Am I being too negative and unreasonable?

It sounds like we're all struggling with anxiety to some degree....definitely made 10 times worse thanks to coronavirus!

I agree that it's really hard to know what to do for the best. I'm quite a laid back person so have been relatively relaxed during lockdown. I was sent to WFH in March but still went out for daily walks and popped to the shops etc. I'm staying with my dad and sister who have both continued working throughout.
Since May I've had a few socially distanced garden chats with family and a couple of walks with my best friend then, more recently, other family members have been round to the house for dinner.

So, I definitely haven't been shielding (I'm not clinically vulnerable). I've just been careful.....socially distancing, washing hands religiously, avoiding busy places etc.

As time goes on though, i am getting more stressed about the baby and people wanting to meet her and hold her etc. I don't want to be over the top but I need to protect her so don't want a free for all either!

@superscientist definitely not negative, I would feel the same. From what I've heard It's hard enough having a newborn in the house never mind selling and buying a house at the same time, but on the other hand it would be good to get that saving on stamp duty. I'm itching for a new house thankfully we're renting so will be first time buyers but nothing we like has really popped up yet and even when it has the price has jumped and been sold so fast it's hard to keep up with. We inquired about viewing a house last week had only been on the market 2 days when we seen it online for £144,950 when I called to arrange a viewing it was already up to £155k so didn't bother. I'm trying to talk myself out of even looking at the minute but it's hard. Moving and setting up a whole entire new house will be so hard with a newborn though so early next year might be a better shout anyway. Hard to know what to do though.

@Superscientist I find moving so stressful. I get where your partner is coming from with the stamp duty holiday but your mental health and looking after your newborn have to take priority.
Maybe take it off the table for now and rediscuss when baby is 4-6 weeks old. See how you all feel then.

@JMill13 Exactly what you said, it is making us all a bit crazy. Maybe go for an option in the middle with friends whereby they bring takeaway to yours outside? Unless of course you need to confront your anxiety head on?

We're all struggling with who to see, when and what precautions to take. But we all need to be happy with what we decide. We're the only ones who are out babies parents, we're the ones whose job it is to keep them safe. Regardless of upset family members who may feel differently, they never had to be pregnant or have a baby in a pandemic. It's totally different to anything they ever dealt with and they may need reminding of this.

@cannotmakemymindup I think I need to tackle it Head on. I always have done that's how I've managed to make it to 30 without ever having to take tablets for it I just sort of force myself to do things. I'll just make sure I sit at the end of the table as far apart from the girls as possible and be happy that I'm eating food that's not a takeaway or something that I've cooked, away from the house. Just need to keep talking myself through it in babysteps

@Superscientist we took our own photos and the estate agent only let people view that could prove they are in position to move. Turns out we only needed one viewing and sold within 4 days of going on the market. I will say though that it should give people a kick to move quickly if it is just 6 months but will be listening later to see the conditions involved. DH viewed 3 houses for us and I saw 2. This was in the first week of the easing so masks, gloves, not allowed to touch etc, if you do let people in and it’s entirely your choice if you want to then I would make them wear masks & gloves still. I would think doing viewings would be tricky time wise as you won’t be in a routine as such to know when feeding, changing etc is for planning times. Any time I tried to get out with DD I could guarantee she would explode from one end or both and need a full change in the early days. Only do what you are comfortable with.

@annie1994 that’s such bizarre advice if your test results came back clear. Though when they went through the scan results the sonographer said to cut down on sugar until I get my results just in case. How long did it take to get your results?

At my 20 week appointment his abdominal circumference was on the larger side but still within the normal range and no one seemed concerned or even mentioned it. We had a private scan at 27 weeks and the abdominal circumference was measuring pretty average (50th percentile) so I’m hoping it’s nothing serious 🤞🏼

Add me to the stressed out because of family club 🙋🏽‍♀️ My husbands parents are sensible and have come up for a visit last weekend, we didn’t hug/kiss them and just enjoyed the company. It was nice to see them again and nice for them to see me pregnant as we haven’t seen anyone since the first trimester!! This weekend we are going to visit my family in London and I am so stressed about it. My husbands sent my mum a text saying we’re still trying to be careful and so won’t be hugging etc. I know my mum will be moaning because of that and I dread to think what we should do after baby arrives! Potentially thinking about making everyone stay away for a week and then after a week they are welcome to come if they stay in a hotel and not with us?? I know 2-4 weeks isolation is best but I can’t imagine them complying. My mum might just drive down when I’m in labour omg

@Superscientist we’re also in the middle of a house purchase so I sympathise! Tbh if you live in an area where houses go quickly and you know you’ve got a good chance of selling fast and at a good price, I would probably just go for it. It would save a lot of money and whilst you might have a difficult start, you may also have a lovely happy baby who is easy to pop in a sling and go for a short walk with. You never know! If it’s too stressful you can always reevaluate and take it off the market for a few weeks surely? If you can afford it definitely get a cleaner in to do cleans before viewings though and make sure lots are all done in one day so you don’t have to clean up constantly. That’s what I would do!

We’re buying in Wales and the people we’re buying from haven’t had the opportunity to do viewings because they’re not yet allowing it so we’re just in limbo. It’s so frustrating as we were supposed to move months ago pre COVID and I would have loved to get a nursery set up and painting/flooring etc. Now will have to do all the redecorating with a newborn and we have no family close to help. Good job I like DIY although I’m working on getting my husband on board to do it all up at the beginning rather than live in a 1930s decor house

Thanks for the reassurance. We had the house valued the other week so we could work out if we could afford to move. I'm sure we will talk about it again, in my mind I want to see what type of baby she is. The only exposure to babies my partner has had has been one of friends and they had dream babies - sleeping through since 6 weeks babies that you only ever read about in fiction kind of babies! I think he will be in for a shock!! We would be moving out of the county too so I probably wouldn't qualify for the perinatal team anymore. My last episode was also triggered by our last house move 2 years ago so I feel justified in being cautious. I'm hoping that he will come round to my way of thinking. It's just not something I think we need to rush into right now. The driver for the move is improving his commute as he got a dream job last year and has a long commute.