November 2020 babies - thread 8!

[wannabebump]

New thread xx

Congratulations @fancyfrogs! So glad your little boy is doing well.

@JJxo I’ve written to my local MP about the lack of flexibility for partners in labour/time restrictions post-birth, who have said they’ll speak to my hospital. Whilst I understand the need to reduce virus transmission, it doesn’t stand up to science (everything DH has I have as we’re the same household; it makes no sense to allow him only in active labour and also send him away post-birth only to come back at visiting time as we have the same germs and they’re letting him in anyway...) and it feels totally contradictory to current policy with pubs etc. open.

I’m so sorry it made you anxious, we should all be kicking off more of a fuss about this imo

Thank you everyone. He's doing brilliantly so far and has managed since last night off his ventilator. Baby steps in the right direction

We're not allowed any visitors at all on the ward at the moment, so that would be x number of days completely alone (aside from staff, obviously)

@Anotherboy I’m so sorry, that’s so unfair. I’m also tempted by a home birth over not having DH there but there is a very real chance they’ll cancel them again if the situation gets worse (and not sure they’d let me have one as a FTM!)

Not sure about everyone else but I have a strong desire to nest at the moment and am really finding work motivation tough!

How are you finding out about visiting restrictions at your hospital? I've looked online (Hampshire) and it does say about limited to one birth partner but can't find anything about having to be 4cm before they are allowed in/no visiting postnatal like I've heard on the news elsewhere?

@MillieFTM I think the restrictions very much vary from hospital to hospital, so your best bet is to ask your MW directly. I asked mine and she keeps me updated on where certain restrictions have been lifted. I think the general rule of thumb is the birth partner isn't allowed in until active labour (after you're about 4cm dilated). From what I've read, once you're in active labour they then look to move you to delivery suite for example. I'm a FTM too, so I'm sure those on second pregnancies will have better knowledge here, but from what I've read (and it can vary from person to person), you usually dilate about 0.5cm per hour in the active stage of labour. In the first stage of labour the contractions are apparently manageable and more sporadic. So if you have the luxury of not living too far from your hospital, they generally encourage you to stay at home for the initial stage anyway as you will find you're more comfortable. You go to hospital when contractions are timed about 5 minutes apart, so I'd assume at this point it is more "established" labour and your birth partner will be able to be with you. Of course, I realise this can vary wildly from person to person but seems to be the rule of thumb for spontaneous labour. I also appreciate this does not at all help those of us who will need to go in for induction for example. As that part we will definitely need to wait out alone until established labour actually starts.

I asked my midwife when I saw her yesterday, and it does seem to vary a lot between places. In Cardiff partners are only just now allowed to routine scans. But it could all change (for the better, fingers crossed) by November

Super thank you! Also hoping and fingers crossed it's all a bit calmer come November, but all this second wave talk makes me worried we're all going to be back in lockdown again! Will just have to wait and see!
Can't quite believe how quickly these 9 months are going!!

I agree it seems to be dependent very much on area/trust, but I was admitted to a maternity ward last night (bleeding due to a low lying placenta) and I just made the assumption I had to come alone and then the midwife casually asked me earlier 'is your partner coming to see you later?' It turns out that the current rules here are that you can have one person visit you during visiting hours (8-8), but that person must remain the same (e.g it can't be your partner one day and then your mum the next). The same goes for women who have just given birth, so I'm assuming it would be the same for women who are in before they're in active labour (as I would need to be, to get antibiotics for group b strep - I have to come in at the first signs of labour). Obviously no help if that happens at 2am, for example, but just getting to see my partner for a couple of hours after he finished work today, after thinking I wouldn't be able to, was amazing!

@MeandSpud hope you’re ok, and very glad that your trust has some sensible visiting rules!

Agree that we can just hope things change before November.

@Missworry92 yes ! I've been getting clicks for ages. I said to my husband it was like when my ankle or knee clicks into place but inside my belly. It's so strange.

@futuredreams how far are you? I'm glad I'm not the only one 😂 I've read that there's nothing wrong with the clicks but just so bizarre, weird how nobody actually knows what causes it 😁

@Missworry92 I'm glad someone else has had them too! I'm 30 weeks now. Seems crazy to say that. 30 weeks x you?

Hi ladies, hope you're all well! I was 30 weeks yesterday and had booked a 4D scan and wow the images were so good! It's suddenly all feeling very real now that there's a little baby in there! If anyone is thinking about getting a scan I would defo recommend 😁x

@CoBell I have one booked for after my hospital scan. I'll be 32+5. I panicked and bought one yesterday thinking I might have left it too late but I'm really glad you said it was good!

@futuredreams I'm 28+5 so not too far from you and only noticed the clicking since last week 😊 I imagine the baby is sucking this thumb or something 😁
@CoBell ahh I was thinking to book one 😊 thank you for the recommendation. I had it done 3D when I was 18weeks but it wasn't very clear 😊

This might be quite early to ask for some, but I’m due beginning of November and wondering what nappies people are planning to buy. I’ve heard really good things about Aldi nappies, I saw that they have won awards in 2019. Was going to buy a few packs of pampers too so that we could compare. What’s everyone else thinking??

I bought a box of the Aldi Mamia nappies when they were on offer a couple of weeks ago, got 144 nappies for £4, all size 1 so should hopefully see us through the newborn period.

@JJxo - Planning to use disposables for the first 4 to 6 weeks and then transitioning over to cloth nappies. Have a trial set of cloth ones to determine if they will work for us, but plan to use disposable for first month or so rather than commit myself to all the additional laundry at that early stage!

Lidl Lupilu range seems to be good too. Got free samples and money off voucher with NCT gumf. Has anyone had experience with these? Good or bad

Ah I lost this thread for a while. Congrats @fancyfrogs and hope little one is ok!

@MeandSpud how did they find out you had GBS? Was it from a UTI? I had it show up in a routine urine test but I haven’t decided whether to go for the antibiotics or not.

@HarrietM87 I had a swab at about 6 weeks, as I thought I had thrush and it was picked up then. I had antibiotics at the time but have been told I still have to have them when it's time for baby to arrive. I wasn't really given a choice, just told that's what needs to happen and it's plastered all over my hospital notes - it's taken quite seriously (and rightly so - a friend of mine gave birth recently not knowing she had it so no antibiotics beforehand and both her and baby ended up with sepsis and a 7 days hospital stay with antibiotics once he was born.)

Thanks @MeandSpud. It’s definitely a choice - you don’t have to accept any treatment so don’t let them railroad you if it’s not what you want (of course fine if it is what you want!).

From my chat with my midwife there’s a 0.5% (1 in 200) chance the baby could develop an infection if the mother tests positive in pregnancy, and the antibiotics are about 80% effective in preventing this (so some babies still get infected even where the mother has had them, and if you don’t get the antibiotics at least 4 hrs before birth the effectiveness drops to 35%), and there are various risks associated with the antibiotics themselves, so it’s not a clear cut decision for me at all. I’m still weighing it up and struggling tbh! Hope your friend and her little one were ok!

@AnxiousLady1 I am thinking of doing the same thing with disposable/reusable. Which trial set did you go for?
I have some disposable and am now looking into starter kits that don’t have a massive outlay just in case I don’t get on with them.

@HarrietM87 @MeandSpud I too have been found to be carrying GBS. I'm prone to UTIs so they cultured my last urine sample and found it that way.
I'm definitely going for antibiotics! They normally use penicillin so obviously if someone is allergic, they're very dangerous but I've had penicillin/ampicillin before with no issues. Anything I can do to reduce the risk to my little girl, I'll do. Yes, the risk of her becoming infected is low but the consequences if she became infected can be awful - over a 5% chance of death and over a 7% chance of long term disability. The only downside I can see is that you can't have a home birth but we weren't looking to do that anyway. I'm all for having choices but for me, that choice is pretty clear! 😊