👣 Due late Nov/Dec, it's bump time ladies! 👣

[ChampooPapi]

Thread 3 👣👣👣

Glad to hear people's scans are going well! I can't wait for my private one next week!! We're not finding out sex but if we can figure it out from photos I probably wouldn't be devastated lol. That's amazing to hear some areas are letting partners into the 20 week scan, maybe my area will do that...

I feel like because all my jeans are high waisted I stopped wearing them like 6 weeks in as I already felt so much bigger! I got my maternity clothes from H&M and they're great, I actually like maternity jeggings better than normal ones as I like how the stretchy bit keeps my body warm 😆

The movement for me is definitely off and on but very nice. Tonight I was like hmm I think I can feel the heartbeat and my husband was like you definitely cannot 🤣 it's just my placenta or my own heart.

Have we moved thread? I need to work out how to find you all again!!

@lockdown84 not yet still space on this one and whoever starts the next will put the fresh link here :)

@lockdown84 don't worry I'll wait until this one is nearly full so there is no crossover and everyone gets responded to and link the new one 🥰

Morning all. Lovely bumps and glad to see scans are going well! I have my consultant appointment Friday and my scan on Monday.
Possibly tmi but what's everyone doing about sex? Carrying on as normal? Modified practices ? 🤣 I've been too nervous for more than a bit of fumbling

@RunnerGirl123 we are all going to be thinking of you today, update us when you can, I'll @ you on the new thread so you can easily find it as well. I just hope they can do this surgery on your little girl, I know it's another unknown and you must be so adrift with all the worry, but hopefully by the end of today you and your partner will know the pathway forward for her xx

@chubbyhotchoc I do lots of fumbling and cuddling but after laying on my back for sex a few weeks ago and feeling like I was about to have a stroke I'm pretty much like ' I think we may leave this until after the baby comes now'.

I know it'll get back on track, it's so bloody uncomfortable I think I'm officially celibate for the next 5/6 months.

Lol, I'm a rampant toucher and cuddler with my partner so he'll survive the dry spell but my pyjamas are staying on now for the foreseeable 😆.

@chubbyhotchoc great question! I had sex at about 15 weeks and bled during so completely freaked out. After a few weeks of abstaining, husband getting withdrawal symptoms and me feeling guilty we tried again. This time no blood but couldn’t enjoy it - had last attempt on the brain. Since then another go, more foreplay to start and then much more success. Has to be in the mornings though as feel like a bloated whale at nights, so pretty much once a week only now weekend mornings Would love to get others perspectives on this! I’m feeling guilty to hubby that we’re not having more.

@RunnerGirl123 wishing you the very best for today. Stay strong x

@ChampooPapi thanks for the update - don’t want to lose you guys!

I can’t enjoy sex either. Poor husband is struggling with lack of, since all the trying we did earlier in the year, but it’s all very different. I thought I’d get a new lease of life, but I’m definitely not feeling it!

We’ve tried three times now, so I think we’ll just try and do foreplay a bit from now on and maybe try again near due date to encourage baby to make its way.

@chubbyhotchoc when I had my bleed and ended up in hospital a few weeks ago it was after sex do I've been too scared since then to be honest! It may not have been down to that but in my head it was a factor so we haven't had any since. I'm not sure I feel confident enough to try again!

Oh my goodness for me it’s just complete lack of sex drive. I have no desire for sex. We have done it a couple of times and other things, still feel close but tbh i felt rubbish until week 16 anyway so as if I’d be wanting it then, and last few weeks just no interest :( I do not feel guilty at all and my husband would never try to make me feel bad! I have enough on my plate!

Glad to see others aren't swinging from the chandeliers 😂 I worry about bleeding too as I bled a bit in the first couple of months. We've not done it since bfp. I did initially say just until the 12 week but I still don't feel ok about it. I mentioned it to the midwife and she said it would be fine but then I said 'well why don't you recommend smears then?' and she said it could stimulate the cervix 🤷‍♀️
Luckily dh does appreciate other forms. Night time is a no no as I'm too tired but first thing before the kids are up works fine for me although having put more than 10lb on isn't great for my sex drive.

Question what you ladies think of this also currently only 17 weeks 3 days do you think it's to early to purchase it's from America but folds etc so good space saver also looks bigger than a moses basket so baby be in for longer

@Kj1010 I looked at that. It seems to offer almost everything the next to me does but I think it looks a bit too good to be true. I messaged them and asked about the size of the mattress ( because if it's difficult to get sheets it'll be useless) and if it was c e registered but didn't get a response

Glad I’m not the only one! We’ve done it a couple of times but I’ve found it quite uncomfortable all round. My belly is now in the way but also can’t tolerate anything touching or moving my boobs. Agree with @peachypetite tho, you should deffo not feel guilty. OH didn’t exactly enjoy the sex we did have where he could clearly see my discomfort (my choice to plow on 😂) so he’s happy to put it on hiatus for now. Still wondering where all these good bits of pregnancy are?! Apart from getting a baby and feeling them grow all my other symptoms have been negative

@Awkes I feel the same. So far I've had bad acne on my face, neck and back, all day all
Night nausea, food aversions, stretching pains, nose bleeds and I've gotten horribly fat. I think it's a rare few that find it wonderful and glowy.

This conversation is very reassuring. It's been a struggle all year for us. With IVF you ironically have to abstain for periods of time and I think DH just got a bit fed up with asking if it was ok. We managed it after the 12 week scan and again a couple of weeks ago but I think he can tell I'm not enjoying it as I'm so worried it's going to cause something. Waiting for that confidence and glow to come!. As a FTM I'm a bit worried about the long term effects of this on our marriage but if course he is completely cool with it and just happy we are at the stage we are at so just going with it....

The screening midwife called to chat NIPT results and I cheekily asked if I could have an earlier appointment than 3pm next week as it's my birthday and I know I will worry all day so she moved me to 8am! So pleased I can just get it done. Still no partners though but glad I asked

It is useful to be able to talk about all these things! DH and I have been having sex, probably not as frequently as normal, but ironically, I've spent the past four years with mid cycle bleeding, bleeding after sex etc etc all because of my stupid hormones, and now I'm pregnant it all seems fine. I think also my cervix is so high up that nothing is getting banged! Apologies for that graphic!

I've really enjoyed it, and we've found a couple of positions that are comfortable and manageable, and I like the fact that DH is able to keep seeing my body as sexual not just pregnant, as I'm hoping that will make the transition after birth back to sex much easier. It's different for everyone though. I think as long as you can maintain romantic intimacy, whether that's just cuddles and kissing, or more, so that you still feel engaged as a couple beyond the fact that you're having a baby, it's much easier to stay in tune with each other. And also there are a lot of days when I just want DH to rub my achey hip or whatever and make me a cup of tea😂

@RestorationInsanity agreed I think it's important to retain some level of intimacy even if it's not penetrative. I always feel closer to dh when we've been a bit naughty. I think if you've been totally without for 9 months it's going to be weird when you want to start again.

we've been pretty much the same to be honest but I have started to find some positions uncomfortable so just a bit of figuring out what's okay really!

I know what you mean @RestorationInsanity, I'm a pretty slim build usually so with a tiny bump that's not quite "I am pregnant" I've felt a bit odd at times! Nice to feel like he's not viewing me any differently, feel even closer actually!

I think pregnant women can be seen as very fragile, and of course if you're having difficulties it's important to be mindful of them. But my body is still my body, and I want to enjoy it, now and after childbirth. Even down to things like when we're in bed, even if we're not doing anything but laying in bed, I try and still cuddle DH and stroke his back or whatever, and not make everything about the baby or my pregnant body (sometimes tricky with an enormous u-shaped pillow in the bed too, which DH has named Ursula! 😂)

It obviously depends entirely on your relationship with each other, yourselves, and sex generally, but I think masturbation can be an important way of both partners achieving a sense of release or satisfaction during pregnancy even if the other person doesn't feel comfortable having sex or doing other things. I've let DH know, as I hope he always knows, that it's fine if he wants to do that, it's not an affront to me or our sex life.

On an entirely different note, baby booted me right in the middle of the stomach last night, totally out of the blue, and then nothing! 😂 Just a reminder that he/she was still there I guess.

@kkr168 thank you hun, and yes we do!! Your bump is starting to show, so cute. Crazy how everyone differs in size!! I genuinely feel 6/7 months right now and it came out of nowhere! Some of my colleagues were off for a week or two and couldn't believe how it just appeared lol!

@chubbyhotchoc yes your right I'm not going ahead and buying it until I'm sure on the nookie part we havent yet done the deed I know oh pleasures himself even though he says he dont I'm a little scared to do it incase u bleed etc not that I havent wanted to also we have busy schedules with work etc so by the time night comes we both knackered lol I think in couple weeks after 20 week scan and all is ok I think I'll pounce on him lmao he says he doesn't feel right doing it aswell incase it hurts the baby typical Male but to be fair with my other three he was generally the same but after kids were born cudnt wait to start again I'm still waiting for the sex drive to come and the glossy hair and glowy skin it hasn't been terrible so far but hasn't been great either if I'm honest I'm just counting down the months days lol only 4 more months to go whoop

@RestorationInsanity lol dh calls my pillow the lifeboat 😂 he has to clamber over the side to get to me

glad we’re all having similar experiences. I’ve not been overly concerned tbh. OH is if anything more appreciative of my body now I’m pregnant and I’ve no doubt as soon as I show interest again he’ll jump on me. I’m back to work again now so he’s got alone time again which I know he’s taken advantage of. I just feel very tired and generally quite uncomfortable in my body at this point in pregnancy so sex is the last thing on my mind.