November 2020 babies - thread 7!

[wannabebump]

Another thread for us all x

@sweetpea1985 yeah exactly, one on hand I think it would give me peace of mind, especially once we move baby into it's own cot and room after 6 months, but also read things saying it can cause false alarms.
I think I'm considering the nanit as I havent bought a baby monitor yet. I might just get the camera and then see how much of a nervous wreck I am when the baby is here to see whether I get the breathing monitor 🙈😂

I know a few people who had the angel are breathing monitor and they all ditched it after a few weeks. It went off randomly all the time and just freaked them out. I decided against it personally as thought it would feed my paranoia! The baby should have all of its sleeps (inc naps) in the same room as you for the first 6 months (not everyone sticks to this but we did), so you don’t even need to get a monitor before they are born.

You also don’t have to move them out of your room at bang on 6 months - you’re just not meant to before that. My DS was in with us until 12 months as he still had the odd night feed then and I couldn’t be bothered walking further than I had to.

@BumpityBumpo really surprised people have said that - do they think the same about Moses baskets? I don’t know anyone who struggled with the transition to a cot. My son is the clingiest child known to man and even he was fine! Tiny babies love to be close to you and it’s also so much easier for you to be able to see/reach them from your bed, especially if bf as you don’t need to get up in the night at all.

I generally don’t believe in the rod for your own back type comments. No one says nappies are a rod for your back because they eventually need to use the toilet for example!

I've still not been out other than for general exercise since March. I'm not ready to start going around shops but have booked a couple of appointments to look at travel systems in August. My son is going back to nursery in July so will start getting out and about more then as have to get back to some form of normality eventually. I'm hoping I can stay working from home for a bit longer but we will see.

@Sweetpea1985 We had a Chicco next to me and it was probably one of our best buys. I've already bought another for this time around. I've not seen the babylo so can't compare but the next to me was great. We don't have any family nearby either so it's also great to take with you if you travel.

@BumpityBumpo My son was a good sleeper and had no issues moving from the next to me into a cot in his own room at 6 months. I think this would be much more dependent on the child how they adapt rather than the product you use.

@HarrietM87 yeah I will definitely be sticking to having baby sleeping in with us at night and for naps too. So you're right I wont need anything at the beginning because I'll be there. Thanks 😊

I thought I would have DD sleep in with us for at least 6 months, but it turned out she was a really light sleeper. After 8 weeks she wouldnt nap unless in a room alone, so she went for naps in her basket in our room while I was downstairs , and at 16 weeks she went into her own room. She sleeping through the night consistently at that point. I had a video monitor that I was glued to, but she slept ten times better alone than in the room with us. Bizarre. It would freak many people out her not being next to me, but she was just that type of baby. It was a case of have her nap upstairs or she was up all day screaming. I know with this second baby I will be calmer about the sleep. Its nerve wracking, and I woke up many mornings when she was beside me freaked that she was dead, but that's kind of just part of parenting. There is very little you can actually do.

I just don't want to leave going shopping for things too late, when the 28 week mark will be creeping up, and will be back to being considered risky. I get to go back to work for the first time tomorrow, though on v limited duties (not allowed back to my normal area as it's classified as front line due to the virus patients they're still routinely scanning), but they are only letting me in until 28 weeks, and then I'll be at home again. I feel like this is a safer window for getting some things organised, especially if I go at really quiet times.

@Becca65 that's a good point actually that we will be riskier again after 28 weeks.

@biscuit13 welcome 👋🏼 I really recognise your username! Were you on a ttc thread before this?

@Pink15 hi! Yes I was in Jan and Feb. :) I've done a couple of posts on the pregnancy boards too.
@Becca65 do you work in healthcare? I'm trying to work out what my work might do, I work in a gym where we do classes in a studio, so they're not open yet but I'm wondering if they will make me go back when they do reopen or if I will stay off as I'll be getting close to 28 weeks.

Thanks all for the reassurance on the next2me, as I thought they wouldn't be so popular if they were truly that awful.

All the reviews I've read on the babylo sleeper are pretty good and they seem to have high ratings on most of the 'big' websites where you can find them.

@biscuit13 - yeah I am a radiographer. My boss has been super cautious, and said there was no way I could work in CT and didn't want to relocate me as other people were being asked to do things that weren't safe, and advised me to get a sick note until it was safer. I can officially be patient facing as long as they're not suspected/confirmed covid, but he won't let me as there are so many dr's and stuff coming with poorly patients can't distance at all. Hopefully a gym will be really restricting numbers so can be away from people. What is it you do there? I am missing the gym so much - but don't think My OH will let me go back anyway!

@SqidgeBum

I thought I would have DD sleep in with us for at least 6 months, but it turned out she was a really light sleeper. After 8 weeks she wouldnt nap unless in a room alone, so she went for naps in her basket in our room while I was downstairs , and at 16 weeks she went into her own room. She sleeping through the night consistently at that point. I had a video monitor that I was glued to, but she slept ten times better alone than in the room with us. Bizarre. It would freak many people out her not being next to me, but she was just that type of baby. It was a case of have her nap upstairs or she was up all day screaming. I know with this second baby I will be calmer about the sleep. Its nerve wracking, and I woke up many mornings when she was beside me freaked that she was dead, but that's kind of just part of parenting. There is very little you can actually do.

I'm with you! We gave up with sharing a room with DS at four months. We all kept each other awake and it was dreadful. Once he was in his own room for bed, it was much easier because I put him to bed for the night and didn't have to worry about putting the lights on etc. when we came up. Day naps were so much easier too. I think as long as you are laying them down safely and having a monitor, all babies are different and let you know what they like 😀

@littlegem84 it's funny how they just decide something isnt it. I remember being worried when I put her in her cot in her own room about the fact that none of my NCT friends were doing the same, but then my mom gave me the best advice; 'remember, your baby hasn't read the parenting advice'. 😆

@SqidgeBum @littlegem84 one of my friends did the same and moved the baby to their own room at 4 months - whenever he saw them he'd start smiling and refuse to sleep 🤣 I think it's probably okay as I think cot death is much more common in the first 8 weeks or so

Honestly, when it comes to cot death, you can do your best to make sure things are safe in their bed, they arent too warm etc but it's easy to fall into over worrying about it, hence people saying the heart sleep monitors can cause more panic than they solve. You could drive yourself utterly insane with worry over the million things that can happen on a daily basis, and all of them are just a click away on the internet. You have to try and balance it.

I loved the next2me and will definitely be using it again with this one. We also moved number 1 into their own room at around 4 months. I'd gone back to work and they were sleeping through the night already, the transition was seamless.

From what I’ve seen from friends, sleep is really different between bf and ff babies (bf wake up more!), plus you add their personalities and your set up at home into the mix.

The guidelines are guidelines, not laws, so you can do what you want. The important thing is to know what they say and why so you can make an informed decision. The lullaby trust is the most reliable source I’ve found.

Thanks for all the thoughts ladies. Think we'll definitely go with a next to bed crib to start with just need to pick one lol.
I'm going to look at the babylo one and then the chicco to see if theres any difference in them apart from the price tag

@Sweetpea1985 the chicco was on sale at Lidl this week, down to £125 so we got one, maybe check if it's still at that price if you're looking!

@Addler oooh, good shout! I'll have a look thank you

I feel like a bit of a dumb ass, but apparently snowsuits arent safe for use in car seats any more, so does that mean pramsuits are also not suitable? Or are they different?
I'm finding all this health and safety stuff a bit overwhelming, I want to keep her safe but certain things have been around for years and we survived right??

@sweetpea1985 it’s a no to pram suits and snowsuits in car seats. The harnesses don't fasten safely enough over bulky clothing (so the same applies to coats too). And there’s a risk of overheating too.

Ye it's a big no no to any bulky clothes in car seats. The harness simply becomes useless with bulky clothing under it. This even goes for coats as they get older. I thought it would be hard to do this but I just had lots of blankets over the baby and I always took her out of the car seat and lay her into a snow suit in the low down pram when I got to wherever I was going. I also used to turn the car on for ten minutes or so to let it heat up a bit. Now she just has her coat put on when she gets out of the car.

Try not to get top overwhelmed about things. It is a lot, but the main things are sleeping which is easy (just dont put anything in their cot bar their sleeping bag and no bumpers) and the car seat (always buy new, no bulky clothes, rear face for as long as possible). There a million other things that people get het up over. I remember one friend reducing me to tears because I bought factor 50 suncream that wasnt a kids one. Guess what, it didnt kill her! Kids are resilient to most things, so try and think 'will this kill them?'.

I thought bumpers were safe if they are secured as it stops their arms going through the bars???
Really think I need to be reading up on stuff, it's all very confusing. 🤔

I remember reading that bumpers were no longer ok. This was 2 years ago. Maybe its changed again. I just never put them in mine but she was in a bassinet with fine mesh surround for 4 months and when she went into the cot she never had a problem with her arms. I always went by the idea that the cot is empty bar the baby.

I have heard good things about the lullaby trust so go with what they say.

Thank you @Squidgebum I'll take a look.
I'm starting to get a bit freaked out about how clueless I am, I'm stressing about blankets, monitors, you name it I'm confused and stressed lol