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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Thread for us classed as mature pregnant ladies

999 replies

Sheera1 · 18/05/2020 12:29

Hi all. I wasn't wanted to hijack any threads on hear with specific questions, but wondered if anyone fancied a chat thread for us classed as mature mums to be? Anyone who feels they fit in that box are welcome to join.

I will start. 🌞

I am 41. I have a 10 year old ds and one mmc 3 yrs ago. New partner is reason for the gap.

I was very shocked when I found out as we had assumed that ship had sailed as no joy since mmc. Head was in that camp and was quite a shock to come out of it.

I am 13 weeks based on my scan later Friday. Awaiting NIPT results hopefully today or tomorrow. Been cautious after mmc but hard to not get so attached as the weeks go by.

My first purchase if all ok will be a pregnancy pillow.

Honestly I feel massive already. I am very overweight but was with ds and had a perfect fuss free pregnancy. This time I am so 🤢 and tired and feel just ill from 4pm onwards.

Instead of it easing up, last night I was still feeling 🤢 trying to sleep and was very uncomfortable due to feeling like my womb is massive.

Anyone else feeling like this? Goodness knows how I will be weeks from now. Eeek.

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35
LJEva · 13/06/2020 07:23

Sorry new to posting! I meant to tag @AncientandPregnant in my congratulations x

Samk79 · 13/06/2020 09:16

Hello ladies,
I'm 40 and 26 weeks pregnant with baby number 3. I have two older children from my previous marriage so feel like I'm starting all over again!

I had a miscarriage at 11 weeks last year and had to have an amniocentesis with this pregnancy due to being high risk but thankfully all came back normal 😊

PregnantPorcupine · 13/06/2020 09:21

Hi @LJEva and @Samk79 - welcome to the thread Smile

Countingblessings · 13/06/2020 10:07

@ancientandpregnant that's wonderful news! I have everything crossed for you.

@Liese27 what a tough time for you, hopefully we can help give you a virtual hug

Welcome other new people too (although this is only my 2nd post so I feel funny saying that!!)

I think I need a mumsnet kick up the bum. I have been longing to give my 3 year old a sibling. MMC in Feb which was devastating and all I wanted was to be pregnant again. 12 week scan yesterday, heartbeat found and all normal although baby was lying awkwardly so need to go back for measurements and the down syndrome scan. I thought I would be shouting from the rooftops, but I just feel numb and a wee bit sad? Sad this baby will have a bday close to christmas. Sad he/she will have older parents (although we plan to hang around as long as possible Grin). Sad that my girl's life will be turned upside down and she has no idea. Sad about going back to nappies and sleepless nights etc. The list goes on. It's horrible. I want this baby SO much and will be devastated if anything happens but just cant get excited and I really want to be. This will be my last pregnancy and I want to enjoy it. Any hints to help me pull my head out of my rear end?! X

onlyreadingneverposting8 · 13/06/2020 11:17

Hello to all new people! So many posts today!! @LJEva I'm 44 (16+4 days pregnant) and also not had any of the blood tests. I had the nuchal fold measured and that was normal. We (I) decided that after a few miscarriages I really couldn't handle extra worry - but like you really!

To those who know me better - woke up feeling not so bad this morning....promptly threw up again! 🤦🏽‍♀️ I've still got virtually all day nausea though 😔 I've taught myself to crochet in the last couple of weeks and have nearly finished a blanket for the baby - it's in neutral colours as I started before we knew the sex. I'll post a pic when it's finished.

onlyreadingneverposting8 · 13/06/2020 11:24

@Liese27 congratulations on the 12 weeks scan success. It's really hard after mmc and mc - I've had 5 altogether and 3 in a row before this pregnancy. And you're going through so much at the moment too! But you're NOT old!!! I'm 44!! That's old in Pregnancy terms! But I don't feel old!! Lots and lots of women have babies in their late 30s - lots that are having their first babies in their mid and late 30s now. People say I was young having my first at 25 nowadays!

Frazzlerock · 13/06/2020 11:52

Morning all!

Welcome to all the new guys. I'm afraid I struggled to keep up when it was just a handful of us so I will do my best and try and keep up as we go along. Forgive me if I ask you something you've already explained though 😁 For now I'm sending a wave from Camp Frazzle 👋 😁

Shall I dig out the list? We've had about eleventy billion of new mummies join us since then so it deffo needs updating! Perhaps on our next thread we can have it on the first post so it's easy to refer to.

@onlyreadingneverposting8 ooh you've nearly finished? I've still 54 stripes to go on my rainbow blanket. It's gonna take me FOREVER! Done 34 so far. It is huge though, like single bed sized which I now realise is way too big for baby so I think I'm going to have to make another smaller one. Maybe a different pattern and then he/she can have the big one when they're a bit bigger.

I think I can feel movement happening. I mean I was getting to odd subtle poke but couldn't be sure. But if I concentrate really hard and lie down I can feel deep down flutterings which deffo doesn't feel like the usual tummy pops and gurgles.

DP and I have been discussing maternity leave this morning. He says we should plan for me to have a year off. Not sure we can afford that but we shall see. Seeing as I'm having a c-section I could, in theory (if still WFH) work right up until D-Day. But I have 18days annual leave to take so I think I'll tie that on and finish early.

What are all your plans for Mat leave?
We're a bit thrown tv the cost of full time childcare TBH so trying to work all that out as well!

Happy weekend all! So pleased not to be staring at a laptop for a couple of days.

Frazzlerock · 13/06/2020 11:54

Lots of typos! Hope it makes sense

Liese27 · 13/06/2020 12:38

Thank you everyone for the warm welcome.. I struggle to share this journey with anyone else.

@PregnantPorcupine I'm a big believer of the Spinning babies exercises. I helped a colleague turn her breech baby with the inversions and it alsoe helped me birth my DD who was posterior with a face/hand presentation.. I did a tummy lift while having a contraction and she just dropped put after the second one. I actually felt it as she flexed her neck.
@LJEva I totally hear you. I also had friends with a lot of stress during their pregnancies all due to false positives
I think @onlyreadingneverposting8 meant to tag you in her post [wink]@Countingblessings You have been through so much, be gentle with yourself. I am a firm believer of feeling all the feelings and allowing it.. only then we are able to move on to experience joy again. I felt like I had to go way deep and already mourn the loss of this pregnancy (I even prepared everything I'll need for a misscarriage) before I could start having hope again.

Sheera1 · 13/06/2020 13:00

Oft. Hello all. Ended up getting a pen and paper so I could write wee notes for this post to try and get all the updates in.

Hope all are well. My not news was 16 week midwife call. Was not even worth it tbh. She said to keep taking folic acid throughout as it was mentioned on here and my whopping cough vaccine I am to wander round to the clinic after my 20 week scan and someone will do it. Sounds organised Not!

@liese27 Welcome to the thread and hope all goes ok.

@AncientandPregnant so pleased scan found a heartbeart. Such lovely news.

@aliasgrape you did the right thing to go in. I keep thinking movements have stopped but I am only 17 weeks so guess just don't always feel them. I think the triage dept will be sick of me by the end but peace of mind is important.

@pregnantporcupine ta on your comments about NHS results. That is what I am trying to think that due to my age it should have been high risk, so to not be things really must be fine. I mentioned it to midwife and she just said the 20 week scan will hopefully show things if there was an issue.

On the Breech that is a hard one. Ds was back to back and I spent two very uncomfortable weeks on a birthing ball or sitting forward. In the end it didn't help and I wish I had just lazed on the couch. I know it means a section for you though so higher stakes. Being turned sounds unpleasant.

@samk79 hello and welcome. Glad your amnio was clear. I was terrified of having to do one.

@ljeva welcome and yes I think age def makes us all worry more. I think because there are slightly higher risks so we focus on them. Very natural and you are in good company here.

@Countingblessings I am like you too and spent weeks panicking that baby was not ok and how awful if this new future didn't happen. And then when all seems fine I think OMG nappies and school, I am so old, career is over and worry about ds10 who has autism and how he will cope. I think unless you are really wallowing, these are natural thoughts and we need to let them pass and be thought of and here is good company to talk about it. I sam a breastfeeding pic the other day and I was filled with dread at the thought of being so tied down again. But then I also can't wait as it is a new path. Look at lovely baby stuff to buy and that might help pull you up. Thinking of a lovely nursery or new pram. All that time off work. Lovely.

@onlyreadingneverposting8 so sorry you still have the nausea. It is just horrible. Can they give you anything for it as it does seem to be staying?

@frazzlerock hey Frazzle. Happy weekend. So good to be away from the laptop. That is exciting you are feeling wee movements. I was freaking as mine seem less pronounced but midwife said it has more room in there now so prob that is why and I have an anterior placenta which probably blocks some movements. No doubt it will be our next obsession to worry about. I will be annoying triage for sure.

Mat leave I would like to take a year. Using hols and trying to save up and save the 6 months I do get full pay for. Just plan for as long as possible. Return to work is interesting. Ds is going to be home educated with a mix from my folks, his dad and stepmum and me so I was planning to drop a day for sure but think with baby I will need to drop two. Childcare is so expensive. My folks have said before not to expect them to take care of it like they did with ds and his cousins as they are past all that. I do understand. I hope I might work a day from home but from their house so they can help but I am there too ifswim. I think they will prob help out at least one day but they already do so much for me and ds. They have him Mon and Tues though they absolutely love having him and he is not hard work now. A new baby is.

OP posts:
Frazzlerock · 13/06/2020 13:09

Here is the most recent list I could find. I've @ people again so we can hopefully find out who is still with us and if we have had our first baby of the group yet!? Grin @livefortheholidays ?

@Liveforholidays 40. Due 01/06/20 DC?
@Ethellsmum 38. July DC5
@AliasGrape Age? Due 30/07/20 DC1
@stairgates Age? Due 5/08/20 DC12
@Dufferedup 42. Due Sep DC3
@Realladymarmalade Age? Due:29/08/20 DC?
@Ferrylass 45. Due Oct? DC2
@3isthemagicnumber3 40. Due 16/10/20 DC3
@Brightonmaman 41. Due 19 Oct DC2
@WhatWouldPennyDo Age? Due 17/10/20 DC1
@Sheera1 41. Due 20/11/20 ds10
@onlyreadingneverposting8 44. Due 24/11/20 DC?
@Frazzle age 41. Due 26/11/20 DC3 - 7th pregnancy
@EveningReflection 38. Due 04/12/2020 DC1
@MariaDingbat 40. Due 07/12/20 & FTM dc3
@AuntLucy 44. Due Dec
@passthemustard Age? Due Dec DC5
@sunlight81 Age? Due Dec DC's 2 & 3 TWINS!
@footprintsintheslow Age? Due 16/01/21 dC3
@pinklillie 39. Due Jan DC1
@sk283 40. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@Antihop 42. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@mlctobe 41. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@Mummymilla Age? Due 24/01/21 DC3

Feel free to update with your stats and if I've messed anything up, then please do fix it - likely!

Liese27 · 13/06/2020 13:13

Hi @sheera, thank you fot the well wishes.. I've read that that your baby also measured behind. I've been curious whether your baby is catching up to your original dates or do you think you might have had it wrong.. I'm so sure of mine, the max I can be out is 2 days as I tested positive the day before my period was due.

Frazzlerock · 13/06/2020 13:18

@Sheera1 you get 6 months full pay!? Wow! I only get 8 weeks full pay, then another 8 weeks at 50%. Then it's SMP.
It's going to be a REAL struggle, and that's without another mouth to feed. Childminder near us (a friend of ours so I want our baby to go to her if she has space) charges £6 something an hour. So we worked out about £1300 a month (if I remember correctly) for 5 days a week, 10 hours a day. We both work in London full time so we will need it. Although I'm hoping my work will be a lot more lenient on WFH after this lockdown so perhaps I could do 3 days in the office if I'm lucky. We're seriously going to have to pull in the purse strings.

Countingblessings · 13/06/2020 13:51

Ladies, thank you so much for your replies. I think you're right, it almost feels like a self defence mechanism I've got going on. If I dont let myself get excited or feel happy it wont be so hard to deal with if it goes wrong. That probably sounds really weird.

@Sheera1 good idea, I'll start having a think about the things I didnt have last time that I wished I had and start saving up for them. I bought a lot of stupid stuff last time that I wish I hadn't so I'll definitely learn!

@onlyreadingneverposting8 thank you, and sorry to hear what a tough journey you've been on. for what its worth I honestly dont see 44 as old either. It's just all the medical stuff that makes you feel ancient. As long as you feel up for it then age really is just a number. I need to try and remember that too!!

@Liese27 I havent experienced dates being out apart from my MMC (when I was found to be 5 weeks behind what I thought i was) but i have definitely heard of exerpiences where dates have just been a little bit out and the baby has caught up. You are very early days so will keep everything crossed that your next check puts your mind at rest.

@frazzlerock can I join the list? Sorry I dont know how to do it myself. Do I just cut and paste? I'm 40, due 21/12/20 (eek SO close to christmas) and this will be DC2.

Frazzlerock · 13/06/2020 14:12

@Countingblessings yep, just copy the list, add your deets (it's in due date order) and paste 😊

PregnantPorcupine · 13/06/2020 14:52

@Liveforholidays 40. Due 01/06/20 DC (darling child)?
@Ethellsmum 38. July DC5
@PregnantPorcupine 38.Due 29/07/20 DC1
@AliasGrape Age? Due 30/07/20 DC1
@stairgates Age? Due 5/08/20 DC12
@Dufferedup 42. Due Sep DC3
@Realladymarmalade Age? Due:29/08/20 DC (darling child)?
@Ferrylass 45. Due Oct? DC2
@3isthemagicnumber3 40. Due 16/10/20 DC3
@Brightonmaman 41. Due 19 Oct DC2
@WhatWouldPennyDo Age? Due 17/10/20 DC1
@Sheera1 41. Due 20/11/20 ds10
@onlyreadingneverposting8 44. Due 24/11/20 DC (darling child)?
@Frazzle age 41. Due 26/11/20 DC3 - 7th pregnancy
@EveningReflection 38. Due 04/12/2020 DC1
@MariaDingbat 40. Due 07/12/20 & FTM dc3
@Countingblessings 40. Due 21/12/20 DC2
@AuntLucy 44. Due Dec
@passthemustard Age? Due Dec DC5
@sunlight81 Age? Due Dec DC (darling child)'s 2 & 3 TWINS!
@footprintsintheslow Age? Due 16/01/21 dC3
@pinklillie 39. Due Jan DC1
@sk283 40. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@Antihop 42. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@mlctobe 41. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@Mummymilla Age? Due 24/01/21 DC3

PregnantPorcupine · 13/06/2020 14:53

Ok I have (hopefully - it might have gone wrong Confused) added Countingblessings and myself.

sunlight81 · 13/06/2020 15:05

@PregnantPorcupine

I'm 39! It's actually DC 3&4 as I have a DD18 and a DS1 - I actually have a DSD13 too but it horrifies me when I think I will be mother to 5 and able to start my own footy team!! Shock

Countingblessings · 13/06/2020 15:05

Great, thanks @Frazzlerock. Updated list below - hope I've done it right this time!! . I pressed copy and paste and it copied the whole conversation rather than just the list! So sorry if you guys can see that, I thought I'd pressed preview first! My ancient old brain cant handle technology WinkGrin

@Liveforholidays 40. Due 01/06/20 DC (darling child)?
@Ethellsmum 38. July DC5
@AliasGrape Age? Due 30/07/20 DC1
@stairgates Age? Due 5/08/20 DC12
@Dufferedup 42. Due Sep DC3
@Realladymarmalade Age? Due:29/08/20 DC (darling child)?
@Ferrylass 45. Due Oct? DC2
@3isthemagicnumber3 40. Due 16/10/20 DC3
@Brightonmaman 41. Due 19 Oct DC2
@WhatWouldPennyDo Age? Due 17/10/20 DC1
@Sheera1 41. Due 20/11/20 ds10
@onlyreadingneverposting8 44. Due 24/11/20 DC (darling child)?
@Frazzle age 41. Due 26/11/20 DC3 - 7th pregnancy
@EveningReflection 38. Due 04/12/2020 DC1
@MariaDingbat 40. Due 07/12/20 & FTM dc3
@AuntLucy 44. Due Dec
@passthemustard Age? Due Dec DC5
@sunlight81 Age? Due Dec DC (darling child)'s 2 & 3 TWINS!
@countingblessings 40 Due 21/12/20 DC2
@footprintsintheslow Age? Due 16/01/21 dC3
@pinklillie 39. Due Jan DC1
@sk283 40. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@Antihop 42. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@mlctobe 41. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@Mummymilla Age? Due 24/01/21 DC3

Countingblessings · 13/06/2020 15:08

Ah thanks @pregnantPorcupine!! Folks best to use the list above rather than mine to update Grin

AncientandPregnant · 13/06/2020 16:25

@Liveforholidays 40. Due 01/06/20 DC (darling child)?
@Ethellsmum 38. July DC5
@AliasGrape Age? Due 30/07/20 DC1
@stairgates Age? Due 5/08/20 DC12
@Dufferedup 42. Due Sep DC3
@Realladymarmalade Age? Due:29/08/20 DC (darling child)?
@Ferrylass 45. Due Oct? DC2
@3isthemagicnumber3 40. Due 16/10/20 DC3
@Brightonmaman 41. Due 19 Oct DC2
@WhatWouldPennyDo Age? Due 17/10/20 DC1
@Sheera1 41. Due 20/11/20 ds10
@onlyreadingneverposting8 44. Due 24/11/20 DC (darling child)?
@Frazzle age 41. Due 26/11/20 DC3 - 7th pregnancy
@EveningReflection 38. Due 04/12/2020 DC1
@MariaDingbat 40. Due 07/12/20 & FTM dc3
@AuntLucy 44. Due Dec
@passthemustard Age? Due Dec DC5
@sunlight81 Age? Due Dec DC (darling child)'s 2 & 3 TWINS!
@countingblessings 40 Due 21/12/20 DC2
@footprintsintheslow Age? Due 16/01/21 dC3
@pinklillie 39. Due Jan DC1
@sk283 40. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@Antihop 42. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@mlctobe 41. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@Mummymilla Age? Due 24/01/21 DC3
@AncientandPregnant 42. Due 30/01/21 DC4

Liveforholidays · 13/06/2020 16:29

Hi everyone, yes baby is here!!!! I gave birth to my baby boy on 4th June. All is good, we're just adjusting to life as a family as four. I was induced at 40 +3 weeks due to high blood pressure. The hospital environment was great, I was very well looked after.

AliasGrape · 13/06/2020 16:36

@Liveforholidays Congratulations! I’m so glad your little one is here safely and you had a positive birth experience.

Awww our first baby of the thread 💕

Liese27 · 13/06/2020 16:56

@Liveforholidays 40. Due 01/06/20 DC (darling child) (darling child)?
@Ethellsmum 38. July DC5
@AliasGrape Age? Due 30/07/20 DC1
@stairgates Age? Due 5/08/20 DC12
@Dufferedup 42. Due Sep DC3
@Realladymarmalade Age? Due:29/08/20 DC (darling child) (darling child)?
@Ferrylass 45. Due Oct? DC2
@3isthemagicnumber3 40. Due 16/10/20 DC3
@Brightonmaman 41. Due 19 Oct DC2
@WhatWouldPennyDo Age? Due 17/10/20 DC1
@Sheera1 41. Due 20/11/20 ds10
@onlyreadingneverposting8 44. Due 24/11/20 DC (darling child) (darling child)?
@Frazzle age 41. Due 26/11/20 DC3 - 7th pregnancy
@EveningReflection 38. Due 04/12/2020 DC1
@MariaDingbat 40. Due 07/12/20 & FTM dc3
@AuntLucy 44. Due Dec
@passthemustard Age? Due Dec DC5
@sunlight81 Age? Due Dec DC (darling child) (darling child)'s 2 & 3 TWINS!
@countingblessings 40 Due 21/12/20 DC2
@footprintsintheslow Age? Due 16/01/21 dC3
@pinklillie 39. Due Jan DC1
@sk283 40. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@Antihop 42. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@mlctobe 41. Due 21/01/21 DC2
@Mummymilla Age? Due 24/01/21 DC3
@AncientandPregnant 42. Due 30/01/21 DC4
@Liese27 38 Due 9/01/21 DC2

Samk79 · 13/06/2020 18:08

How do I add myself to the list?

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