November 2020 Babies - Thread 4

[Sakura54]

Another new thread for the Nov mums to continue our discussion. It’s nearly time for our dating scans!

I didn’t know anything about MMC before coming on here. Now I am convinced that it’s happened. Two more sleeps and I get to find out!

@AnxiousLady1 that’s the thing isn’t it, the fact people are more likely to talk about things like missed miscarriages here does distort how likely they are to happen. But at the same time I like at least knowing they’re something that COULD happen, rather than it happening and being completely blind-sighted. I’m someone who likes to have all the information about everything all the time.

I don’t have a strong feeling either way for gender this time...however with my son, I was convinced it was a boy from really early on - and apparently it was so obvious that the sonographer felt confident enough to tell us at my 12 week scan (which was actually just over 13 weeks). I’ve been more sick this time so family are all saying girl, but I know lots of people who have been really sick with a boy, so who knows.

Is anyone else suddenly ravenous? I’m 11+4 today, my sickness/nausea has all but disappeared this week and I now can’t stop eating! I lost half a stone in the first trimester but I’m sure it will all be piling back on quite quickly now!

To be fair a midwife took my bloods yesterday and she had some badass skills 🤣

She needed to get enough blood for;

• Harmony test redraw (two big tubes!),
• Combined test,
• full bloods including iron levels,
• random blood sugar,
• STD screen.

So she got this long, thin elastic ribbon out and gave me a savagely tight tourniquet on my upper arm lol 😆 I yelped and she said I need it to be high pressure and fast to get enough!

She then put the needle in and I could hardly feel it as I was focused on the tourniquet lol! She got all of the tubes filled in about two minutes. I can’t look at needles in my arm but I did find it funny hearing the noise of the jet of my blood hitting the inside of each tube 🙈😂

I have awkward veins, so usually have issues (have even had occasions where the nurses at the blood donor centre have been unable to get anything) but the midwife who did my harmony test did it really well.

@BuffaloCauliflower Absolutely. While I wasn't on MN last time, I just had a bad feeling from the offset as the pregnancy happened by happy accident (of course wanted). So I did all my reading on stats etc and knew what MMC was. So even when it happened me, while brutal, I was prepared somewhere in my brain for that. This time around I've been more cautious on not reading too much/stressing myself out. But equally have kept myself a little more detached (or as midwife said "burying my head in the sand until 2nd trimester"). Some view it as negativity, but it's self preservation. I'm mentally prepping myself for all outcomes, and will likely be beyond shocked with a happy result Friday 😂

To those that had harmony tests- did you confirm the sex?? I definitely want to know soon as I can (I'm impatient), but DH said he doesn't want to know! Good luck with that, as there's no way I'd manage keeping that quiet for 5 months. 😂

@AnxiousLady1 we sound very similar with my first pregnancy last year, though absolutely planned and wanted, I just knew straight away that it wasn’t going to stick (women’s intuition perhaps) so wasn’t that surprised or upset when it ended at 5 and a half weeks. I was prepared for it. This time I actually don’t have those feelings, I feel reasonably positive in fact - for a start I feel like the universe just knows November would be a good time for me to have a baby! But I don’t want to lure myself into a false sense of security at the same time. Feeling a bit nervous about this early scan tomorrow, but at the same time reminding myself that I’ve had no symptoms to indicate anything would be wrong so chances are good. If it is bad news I know I’ll be ok.

I still have a mark on my arm where the midwife actually cut me trying to get blood from me 2 weeks ago. Needless to say, I went to the blood clinic in the hospital who got it first go and I barely felt it. They were shocked at the midwifes attempt. I have bad veins, but she was the worst attempt I have ever had.

Hello,
My last period was 27 Feb, so I'm due very early December. I've been given a first appointment on 27 May, one day before my 13 weeks. I've been told they are putting appointments together (I've got induction and scan on that day) to reduce the need to come into hospital, but shouldn't some things be tested before 10 weeks?

I'm 38, it's my first pregnancy, and I have an "interesting" medical history. I conceived via IVF too. I contacted hospital at 6 weeks, but am just a bit concerned by this.

@AnxiousLady1 I decided not to find out the sex this early. They can reissue the report on request though, so if we change our minds we can find out.

For all of those worried about MMC, this is a pretty good link: fetalmedicine.com/fmf/1996_33.pdf

Sorry for all of you struggling with blood tests! I have very pale skin and very prominent veins to the point where people taking my blood always laugh when they see them and say it’s going to be easy. Fortunate really as I’ve had to have so many blood tests over the years!

I’m another who’s fine with blood tests thankfully. I was on medication as a teenager that required frequent blood tests, so I had to get over any discomfort pretty quickly. I know which arm is best for veins too.

@LewishamMum My scan is only on 11th may so I'll be 14+2. Also worried as I wont have any bloods or anything done before then either!

I used to be absolutely terrified of all needles - not a nice experience as a child in the dentist and I don't have very good veins at all. I'm a lot better now but I know where my 1 good vein is in my left arm! After years of working in an emergency department and taking blood daily from various difficult clientele you'd think I'd be ok with it but I still can't look at my own arm or I go all light headed 🥴 my midwife got it first time though thankfully! I'm hoping I'll be too focused on other things if I need a cannula in for birth... 😂

Hi @LewishamMum - welcome!! I'm 11 weeks tomorrow, also first time.

I've mentioned it before on this thread - the tests they would want to do pre-10 weeks are for sickle cell and thalassaemia. But if you don't have family history of this then there's little cause to worry, as they are genetic diseases. Your heritage might also make you of higher risk - e.g. in the UK, eight out of 10 babies born with thalassaemia have parents of Indian, Pakistani or Bangladeshi ancestry. I raised the same question at my booking appointment because the midwives couldn't get any blood out of me. There's a risk if both your parents are carriers though.

You're just down the road from me - I'm in Hither Green :-)

@FilthyforFirth that's reassuring thank you I honestly think mines turning into an irrational fear because this reason as well - it makes me so light headed. I never knew what a phlebotomist was before today so if I continue to have that problem it's great to know I have that option in the future.

@Sakura54 that's great advice thank you I'll be sure to make a point of it in the future.

@HarrietM87 funny you should say that because I did make a joke with the mw that my veins should be easier to see as I'm not wearing fake tan

Thank you, that’s really helped 🙂x

I dunno about anyone else but I'm still feeling a little bit like this isn't real. Can anyone else relate? Someone mentioned burying your head in sand and I think maybe that's what I'm doing but after three miscarriages and my last one a missed miscarriage I just don't have the belief that this is real yet. And I won't be scanned now until I'm 13+3. I'm 12 +1 weeks today. Just everyone seems to be getting their scans and bloods I guess I'm just a little anxious to know. I do find it really helpful being on here and taking everything in though.

I know what you mean @futuredreams we were TTC this one for 2 years and had 3 early miscarriages in that time. It all feels very surreal and I'm waiting for a scan date. It all feels a bit abstract until then!

@futuredreams I feel the same, I’m just a couple of days behind you at 11+5. When I found out I was pregnant in January I cried my eyes out, I was so happy, but then it ended in miscarriage. This time when I found out I was pregnant I felt nothing, and I’ve spent the past 12 weeks just filled with dread that this is going to end the same, and I haven’t allowed myself to feel that this is real or even be happy about it once. It doesn’t help that I had a bleed at 8 weeks and I wasn’t allowed to go to the hospital to check if everything was okay with all that’s going on so I’ve spent the past month in the dark.
This place is the only one keeping me going too at the moment

I agree with the not feeling real thing...it’s weird because our pregnancies have pretty much coincided with this bizarre lockdown and life feels a bit surreal anyway! I’ve had 2 scans now and it still hasn’t really hit home. And I’m kind of scared of the second trimester wilderness when you lose your symptoms, don’t really have a bump and can’t feel the baby move yet! Think I’ll be freaking out big time!

@futuredreams I was the one whose midwife said I was burying my head in the sand. But in a nice way. She understood. She started asking if I'd looked at antenatal classes etc and I laughed and said how about asking me all this in another couple of months.

All the talk about blood tests. I'm currently at doctors waiting to get mine done. Hate needles. 🙈

Honestly, I dont think it ever feels real, and I dont think the worry ever goes away. I was in a state of shock when I gave birth last time. I couldn't believe that baby was actually in there. And I worried about her every minute of every day for the whole pregnancy. I freaked if she didnt move for a few hours, I cried all the time, I didnt buy clothes until the last few weeks and I didnt tell anyone bar immediate family the gender in case something happened. I couldn't talk about the future. I couldn't wait for her to be born so I could stop worrying. Then she was born, and the worry continued, only I had more things to worry about hahaha. Worrying is motherhood. Its forever. You just learn to push to one side after a while.

What's everyone's diet like at the moment? I'm 10+5 and literally eating fruit, weetbix, dry pasta, cheap tins of tomato soup, dark chocolate and fried egg Baguels. Massive craving for eggs. Not a very nutritious or diverse diet 🤔🤣 haven't eaten a vegetable in weeks. Pretty certain it isn't healthy and starting to feel really guilty. Will it impact bub? This is my first pregnancy and trying to just go with flow but very hard to feel good about everything when I'm eating rubbish.