Pregnant after loss and dreaming of rainbows - 3

[Avocuddles]

Just setting up placeholder for new thread.....

Morning ladies,

Anyone if you have bad lower back pain and ligament pain around the hip joints going all the way to the back? 😟 it's really painful for me today! I know it's a normal part of growth etc but I didn't think it would feel like this yet as the belly has not grown THAT much yet! It's killing me when I'm sitting on the sofa - I have put my pregnancy pillow there to support my lower back but my hip joints are still hurting!

I'm 17+5

@Anon20something ah I’m glad it was a good experience. Yes I think ours is one in one out. I can’t take my 2 year old, so I’ve booked it over nap time and my friend is going to stand round the corner with the buggy 🤦🏻‍♀️

@Knotemma shame your local one is shut. Ours is window to the womb, which I know gets very mixed reviews. Will be fine if all is well. If it’s not to be honest I’ll just leave and call the hospital anyway. Not long until your scan now! Exciting. Yeah I’m the same, one natural miscarriage & everything’feels’ right so I don’t have massive concerns, just the same anxieties lots of people get.

@SunStruck hi, I remember having loads of pain like this with my son. I did have a previous back issue so always put it down to that. I think it can be a time of fast growth even though your bump isn’t big yet. My pain was much worse in the middle of pregnancy than towards the end, so don’t panic that it’s going to be like this or worse for the next 23 weeks!!

@tmc14 I say definitely go for it if it will make you feel better, I had so many scans before 12 weeks (and one after when I had spotting) and they always made me feel better. Even more reason in this weird time if dh can go with you and see the baby, that is important too.

@sunstruck I've been having hip pain this week it's awful. Mainly when I wake up though from sleeping on my side. Think I need to do more stretches / yoga. Been doing light cardio but no flexibility workouts really so need to get on that!

@AnxiousLady1 the wait between 12 and 20 is sooo long! I'm 18 weeks today (yay!) and don't have my scan date yet so don't know if I will be waiting past 20 weeks even. I suspect I will given the circumstances.

@TunnocksTcake I never received my letters for bloods or 12 week scan (ended up asking MW to confirm via phone), but after my booking appointment I received scan letters for when I'm 18 weeks and 22 weeks. Is this normal? I think the 22 week one is anomaly as sonographer was confirming that yesterday too. So what's the 18 week one? Gender? I haven't read into it at all yet to be honest. The old 'continue bury the head in sand until further along' routine! 😂

I may try to get a private scan before 18 weeks if I can find one that I can take DH to.

@SunStruck I've been having bad hip pain since around 14/15 weeks...I had surgery on one of my hips when I was younger so this is weaker anyway and I had put it down to that but midwife thinks it's also to do with the relaxin hormones that are released. I find if I sit or stand for too long it can be agony. Midwife has recommended trying yoga and maybe getting a support band to take some of the pressure off. If it gets worse I've to speak to her again as they may be able to do a physio phone referral to try help. Have a chat with your midwife if it is bad x

Hi @tmc14 I am having a private scan tomorrow, when I will be 8+2. I lost a pregnancy at exactly 8 weeks in Feb so psychologically I just need to know everything is ok. Ours is at window to the womb too as they are the only ones open, this isn't that close to us. At the end of the day it's completely a personal choice, a scan will help some people but may not others. I can't wait until 12 weeks. I know something can still go wrong between scans of course, and I will still be anxious - I just want to know everything has gone as it should so far!
I don't know of an 18 and 22 week scan @AnxiousLady1 do you have reasons for extra scans? I thought it was just 12 and 20
Hope everyone is ok today and enjoying the sunny weekend.

Hi @Whiffle77 good luck for tomorrow. How are you feeling?

My nausea has totally gone, its been a few days now. This is exactly when symptoms tailed off last time. I feel so convinced I'm going to have an 8 week scan and be told the same thing, I feel awful :( xx

Thank you @mogmogmog85 I feel really nervous but I'm glad I'm going. Yesterday was hard as it was the day in pregnancy i lost the last one, but i haven't had any similar symptoms - but I'm still aware of course things can go wrong.
Try not to worry about your loss of symptoms, they vary so much! I had awful nausea for a week and a bit, and then yesterday didnt feel sick at all. Today I do a bit but nowhere near as bad. Your hormones fluctuate a lot I think and it's normal, although I get why you are worried. Your scan will come around really fast!

@Whiffle77 I've appointments at 18 weeks and 24 weeks by the looks of it. And yesterday sonographer booked in my "next scan" at just under 22 weeks. Not entirely sure what other appointments are for. Might not all be scans, but are in the same department. I was marked as low risk at booking in appointment over phone with MW and at my scan yesterday was marked as low risk/monitoring based on NT results. Maybe a mix up as I'm definitely not marked for any additional monitoring. MW might rearrange when we have the 16 week call.

Best of luck with your Window to the Womb scan. I went to then for reassurance at 7+4 (previous MMC was 7 so I just wanted the same reassurance it made it passed that point). I know there's mixed reviews on here about them, but I found the experience much better than last private scan. Due to Covid there was nobody else in there (we went in the evening), and I didn't see any of the balloons or celebratory things people mentioned before. It was just calm. Sonographer read my notes and knew I was nervous wreck and talked me through how she would be quiet initially, so I didnt panic further.

Thanks @AnxiousLady1 I haven't told them about my history so I assume they won't have my notes, but I will do so as soon as I get there. Whatever the experience I will have a better idea of what is happening in there, I imagine I probably could've got an nhs scan if we weren't in this epidemic or if I had any symptoms of miscarriage.
I'm sure you will get more detail from your midwife, that's great news you are low risk

@AnxiousLady1 we definitely only have 1 20 week scan then midwife appt at 24 weeks. You get an extra one by the looks of it you lucky thing!
Well after that my letter came through, scan is on 11th May which is the day I found out I was pregnant with my first loss. I remember thinking how perfect the timing was as it was just in time for me to tell dh on our anniversary. Seeing that date has brought it all flooding back and I feel a bit sick now especially as I have to go in alone. Hoping it is a positive sign and not a bad omen if either of those actually exist.

@TunnocksTcake @tmc14 @SammiLou2312 thanks for the reply, I guess we're all in the same boat! I have exercised today so feel a bit better actually, exercise helps!

Good luck on your scans ladies ❤️ I had one at 16 weeks and my next one is at 20 weeks. Feels so long!

Hi all,
There is a lot is history in this thread! So I haven’t had a chance to read through it all!

I just wanted to say hi! I’m very early pregnant after a MMC in December. I am very excited but obviously very nervous - but trying to stay positive!

All the symptoms I looked out for in my TWW are now the things I want to go away... I’m over analysing every little twinge my body makes...

I just wanted to stop by and say hi to people who are more likely to know and understand how I’m feeling and hope we can support each other along the way ❤️❤️

Hi @Milkshake54 - I'm also early pregnant after an MMC in September. My embryo stopped developing at 6 weeks and I found out at 8+2 at a scan, started bleeding at 10+4. I'm now 6+6 and have a scan at 8+3 in 11 days - I'm terrified! At first in the pregnancy I was able to sort of block it out but since about 6 weeks I've become very depressed about it.. its very mixed emotions falling pregnant after an MMC (or any MC I'm sure!) isn't it? Joy at seeing those lines on the test followed by lots of worry. I'm glad you fell pregnant again though, that's great news, that's what I'm trying to focus on too xx

@Milkshake54 welcome and congratulations. You're in good company here, don't worry about trying to catch up, we're onto our third thread because we're a pretty active group.

I'm pretty sure everyone will agree that obsessive symptom spotting or avoidance are common here. I was terrible for testing obsessively, luckily the ladies here talked me down by about 7 weeks, but I easily did 50 tests (I bulk buy from Amazon after 2 years of TTC). I was also a crazy knicker checker 🤦. It's a really supportive group where you can get your feelings out and we'll all try to help and give you some positivity.

After weeks of being really disciplined about buying I've had a little splurge, bought some sleepers when I did my food shop the other day and just ordered some cloth nappies from Amazon because I'd spotted that they had come down in price. I'm also finding myself on YouTube a lot doing research, I've definitely got a touch too much time on my hands!

Hope everyone is feeling good and enjoying the sunshine

Hi ladies, sorry I've been away for a few days but DHs nosebleeds got worse and ended up requiring a couple of hospital visits (including an overnight stay) though of course I wasn't allowed in. He came home yesterday morning and is doing ok at the moment but it's all been rather stressful and exhausting as you can imagine!
I'm doing ok, though feeling a little nervous about the fact that I've still not gained any weight at all during this pregnancy. Is anyone else in the 16-20wk window in the same boat? I was overweight to start with so guess that may make a difference but only by around a stone.

I've scanned through the thread and was devastated to hear about Doughnut's very sad loss, I hope to see her back here soon.

@Whiffle77 good luck for your scan tomorrow!

@TunnocksTcake my scan is also on the 11th. I found out I was pregnant for the first time on 3rd May last year, I can't believe almost 12 months have passed now, we've been through a lot but hoping it may be third time lucky.

@Milkshake54 welcome! The first few weeks of pregnancy are full of twinges, weird feelings, aches and pains, it's hard to not focus on every single sensation but rest assured they are perfectly normal. Wishing you lots of luck for this pregnancy and glad you've found our lovely friendly and supportive group.

@Knotemma @MOGMOGMOG85 @SunStruck @AnxiousLady1 @SammiLou2312 @tmc14 @Anon20something and indeed everyone else, hope you're having a relaxing weekend

@TunnocksTcake I think you're right. I actually feel more anxious now I've had a good 12 week scan than I did in the first trimester. Not sure why. Maybe there feels like more to lose? I don't know but I definitely feel happy about having another scan before the 20 week one just to check all is ok, and with DH.

@Whiffle77 Ah good luck for tomorrow. Having it just after the loss you had last time is a good idea. I had an early one this time but it was 2 weeks earlier than my miscarriage had been, which didn't really help.

@Avocuddles Crikey, your poor husband. I hope you and he are ok and that they are sorting out whatever is wrong with him. How scary for you, especially when you can't visit. I haven't gained weight either. I was about a stone and a half overweight before getting pregnant. The weird thing is I definitely have a bump, my clothes are tight, but I'm the same weight as when I started. No idea how that works. I might just stop weighing myself and assuming everything is ok. When I had my son I put on over 4 stone, so I'm really hoping I can put on less this time.

@Milkshake54 Welcome and gentle congratulations. I felt I became hyper aware of every last feeling I had in the early days, I would guess I'd have had half those twinges pregnant or not, I just wouldn't have noticed usually. I find this group invaluable, even when I don't really contribute, it's just nice reading about people who feel the same way.

@Avocuddles glad your hubby is back home now, you're really having a tough time of it recently bless ya. Hope you are coping ok and taking it easy now he is home x

@Knotemma I'm having to avoid online shopping at Amazon etc. Would spend a fortune if I did lol. Seen loads of cute baby stuff I want haha. Boredom shopping is dangerous lol

@Milkshake54 welcome to the group and congratulations! Echoing what others have said, you are in a good place here. We all understand the fear and concerns...hell I'm 19 weeks and I'm still a constant knicker checker lol! Wishing you the very best of luck for a sticky bean and healthy pregnancy. In the tough times try to remember, this is a different egg, a different sperm and a completely new pregnancy. The odds are in your favour x

@Avocuddles thats awful! Are they able to do anything for your husband to reduce the chances of it happening again? I'm sorry you're having such a stressful time :( sorry, I can't comment on the weight - are you supposed to put on weight at a steady rate? I'm not sure how it works xx

@Avocuddles how stressful for you and your DH! 😔 did they find out a reason? I hope he is feeling better now (and you!).

In regards to weight, I was super worried about this as I'm checking a pregnancy chart for how much I "should" have gained by now and I'm a bit below too. I have gained 1.3kg so far, and all in 2nd trimester. I've read a lot of women don't put on anything until later in 2nd trimester, and especially if a little bit higher BMI at start. What I've done is that I'm measuring my waist and belly (around the belly button) instead, and I've steadily gotten bigger so I'm not that worried. I think it's a combination of attempting to eat better than pre pregnancy and the lack of wine (and thus the mindless snacking and hangover food the next day!) that does it 🤣

www.calculator.net/pregnancy-weight-gain-calculator.html

This is the one I'm using. Just pop in your own details and check below where you should be sat. Again, I really don't think there's anything to worry about as long as the belly is growing! Maybe ask your Dr if you haven't put anything on towards the end of the trimester?

My SIL has a slightly higher BMI (I don't know her weight but she's a size 14-16) and she only
put on about 5-6 lbs I think, and her baby came out chubby and healthy! She was in her pre-pregnancy jeans 2 days after giving birth, and weigh less than before she got pregnant straight away.

Updating weeks, I've taken Doughnut out :'(

@Bellsx 23 wks (due 20/08/20)
@Rachael321 23 wks (due 20/08/20)
@Pugmum19 18wks (due 31/08/20)
@UrsulaSings 17wks (due 07/09/20)
@Hoping2020 19wks (due 13/09/20)
@SammiLou2312 19wks⁣ (due 17/09/20)
@Knotemma 18wks⁣ (due 23/09/20)
@LilMrsS 17wks (due 24/09/20)
@didslysquiddlydoo 17wks due 26/09/20)
@TunnocksTcake 17wks (due 26/09/20)
@avocuddles 17wks (due 27/09/20)
@Sunflower1608 17wks with twins (due 28/09/20)
@SunStruck 17wks (due 28/09/20)⁣
@Scout20 14wks (due 29/09/20)
@Littlegoth 16wks (due 30/09/20)
@HighHopes20 16wks (due 03/10/20)⁣
@Treaclepie19 16wks (due 07/10/20)⁣
@Aria2015 10wks
@tmc14 15wks (due 11/10/20)
@Hagster 13wks (due 12/10/20)⁣
@seaduck 12wks (due 17/10/20)
@DressingGown87 13wks (20/10/20)
@rachelrainbow (11 weeks, due 1/11/20)
@teaandtantrums90 10 wks (due 07/11/20)
@Shefliesonherownwings 9 wks (due 10/11/20)
@MOGMOGMOG85 7 wks (due 13/12/20)

@tmc14 yeah I am getting to be nervous about my 20 week scan and I know dh is really worried because that's when his sister found their first had spina bifida which led to termination. there is more to lose because you are more invested, although I still find myself trying to not get attached yet, not nicknamed it and I don't talk to it or anything. Also haven't bought a single thing for the baby. Once 20 weeks is over, if all is well, I will have to adjust my mindset and believe this is happening.

@avocuddles bless you and your poor husband that all sounds horrible especially with no visitors at hospital. Glad he is home and hopefully it won't kick off again any time soon.

A couple of weeks ago I was concerned about lack of weight gain - I did gain around 6lbs very early in first tri (I think boobs and water because they grew immediately!) but nothing since booking appt at 8 weeks but since around 16 weeks I've been putting on a small amount each week- less than 1lb- but I am definitely getting bigger so trying not to worry. My appetite has only just noticeably increased so it will probably start to pile on now. I was at my ideal weight and constantly on a diet before hand though so that might make a difference, my BMI was 21 if that helps.

Updating myself and other 18 weekers ☺️
@Bellsx 23 wks (due 20/08/20)
@Rachael321 23 wks (due 20/08/20)
@Pugmum19 18wks (due 31/08/20)
@UrsulaSings 17wks (due 07/09/20)
@Hoping2020 19wks (due 13/09/20)
@SammiLou2312 19wks⁣ (due 17/09/20)
@Knotemma 18wks⁣ (due 23/09/20)
@LilMrsS 18wks (due 24/09/20)
@didslysquiddlydoo 18wks due 26/09/20)
@TunnocksTcake 18wks (due 26/09/20)
@avocuddles 18wks (due 27/09/20)
@Sunflower1608 18wks with twins (due 28/09/20)
@SunStruck 18wks (due 28/09/20)⁣
@Scout20 14wks (due 29/09/20)
@Littlegoth 16wks (due 30/09/20)
@HighHopes20 16wks (due 03/10/20)⁣
@Treaclepie19 16wks (due 07/10/20)⁣
@Aria2015 10wks
@tmc14 15wks (due 11/10/20)
@Hagster 13wks (due 12/10/20)⁣
@seaduck 12wks (due 17/10/20)
@DressingGown87 13wks (20/10/20)
@rachelrainbow (11 weeks, due 1/11/20)
@teaandtantrums90 10 wks (due 07/11/20)
@Shefliesonherownwings 9 wks (due 10/11/20)
@MOGMOGMOG85 7 wks (due 13/12/20)

@Avocuddles what a tough few weeks you’ve had! Really hope the next ones are smoother x

I’ve not gained any weight either, I lost a stone just before Christmas, then was fluctuating a pound either side of 14 stone for a few weeks after Christmas and I’m still there.

Updating my weeks
@Bellsx 23 wks (due 20/08/20)
@Rachael321 23 wks (due 20/08/20)
@Pugmum19 18wks (due 31/08/20)
@UrsulaSings 17wks (due 07/09/20)
@Hoping2020 19wks (due 13/09/20)
@SammiLou2312 19wks⁣ (due 17/09/20)
@Knotemma 18wks⁣ (due 23/09/20)
@LilMrsS 18wks (due 24/09/20)
@didslysquiddlydoo 18wks due 26/09/20)
@TunnocksTcake 18wks (due 26/09/20)
@avocuddles 18wks (due 27/09/20)
@Sunflower1608 18wks with twins (due 28/09/20)
@SunStruck 18wks (due 28/09/20)⁣
@Scout20 14wks (due 29/09/20)
@Littlegoth 17wks (due 30/09/20)
@HighHopes20 16wks (due 03/10/20)⁣
@Treaclepie19 16wks (due 07/10/20)⁣
@Aria2015 10wks
@tmc14 15wks (due 11/10/20)
@Hagster 13wks (due 12/10/20)⁣
@seaduck 12wks (due 17/10/20)
@DressingGown87 13wks (20/10/20)
@rachelrainbow (11 weeks, due 1/11/20)
@teaandtantrums90 10 wks (due 07/11/20)
@Shefliesonherownwings 9 wks (due 10/11/20)
@MOGMOGMOG85 7 wks (due 13/12/20)