November 2020 Babies - Thread 3

[Sakura54]

Another new thread for the Nov mums to continue our discussion!

I also second what @Fredthespider said re the Moses basket. Had one and never used it. However the pram top of the buggy is essentially a Moses basket and also fits into Moses basket legs so Ive always used that instead. It's good to use the pram top because I really don't think the pram top gets much use otherwise.

Sending love @Workingmama1and @Chickoletta. I hope it works out for both of you.
@KatieGlo I bought an expensive pram/travel system (uppababy). It’s still used most days over 5 years later and still going strong. I have a lightweight buggy too but like how sturdy my travel system is and how much shopping I can fit underneath. I bought a Moses basket and neither baby would even look at it. My next to me crib and sleepyhead were worth every penny though.

I think pram depends so much on where you live/your lifestyle. I’m in London and don’t drive so use public transport a lot - the pram is an essential bit of kit! It never needs to go in the boot of a car but it does need to be small enough for bus and tube and be sturdy and good quality. I have a bugaboo bee and love it - still in daily use 2 years on and I have no need of a smaller one. Friends and family who live outside of London and drive a lot tended to buy massive prams and then switch to a cheap stroller after a year or so - they’d prob say now the massive pram was a waste of space and money.

Oh and another vote for next2me here - lasts to 6 months unlike a Moses basket which will do for 3 if you’re lucky, and so nice to have the baby attached the bed if you’re bf. I used a sleepyhead downstairs but actually he mostly slept in my arms/the sling. I don’t think they’re recommended for overnight sleep now and they’re expensive so I might not buy if doing it again.

1. Next to me - great, far better than a Moses which I had first time round, but baby 2 still refused it after a while and dc2 was very long so was out if it after about 4-5 months.

I'll use the Moses for a safe space to put them when I'm downstairs. (But let's face it they'll only be in it for about 30 seconds based on both of my previous children who hated not being attached to me. )

2. upper baby vista here with rumble seat. Lasted since 2013 and converted to a double. I'd personally invest if you're planning on more than one child. I know a few people who bought cheap but had to buy again for subsequent children.

And I've never bought a sleepyhead because they're not recommended anymore.

Cot/sleep space is supposed to be empty, but I do know people who swear by them so it's a shame.

And if you don't want to invest in a buggy I'd get a sling. Neither of mine have ever slept in a pram at all - see previous post about being attached to me! So I'll use a close caboo stretchy initially and won't bother with a pram.

My babies were like that @Tonicandgin. I spent a lot of money on places they could sleep but they mostly preferred my chest. I could however get them to sleep in a sleepyhead. I mostly used it downstairs during the day but I did use it if I was co sleeping as I knew that it would keep baby in one place and prevent me rolling on her. I know neither are recommended but I was on my knees with exhaustion.
I second a sling. Dd2 lived in one for the first few months of her life.

I took my brother’s unused sling and pram, but barely used them either. Strollers are just easier. Not sure how I’m going to go anywhere with a baby and hyper toddler though lol will probably have to use the sling for baby until DS learns that it’s not ok to just run off gets old enough to walk.

I can't wait to be shopping for all these things but my first purchase will be a pregnancy pillow as soon as the 12 week scan so long as everything is ok! I have the fear about sleeping in my back already!

@Acatcalledlola - needs must! I coslept with dc2 pretty much from 2 months until he was 2! I would never have got any sleep otherwise - especially with an energetic 2 yr old too.

He's still a very light sleeper now and often comes in scared from his dreams and sleeps with me in a headlock.

@Tonicandgin @ACatCalledLola same here. My eldest didn't sleep through the night until he was 5😭 the other two I just gave up and they slept in my bed or I slept in the floor next to them or in their beds. I also do a lot of sleeping in the nursing chair when they are very small just because I'm not so comfortable with them in the bed as tiny babies, so it was head lolling and nursing pillow baby prop haha fuckit we all survived anyway

@KatieGlo also think about where you will use it. Where I live has cobbled streets and we would also off road a lot so we needed something which could handle both. We got an I-candy peach but second hand - a bit bulky but was really good for us though a pain to fly with as was a 2-piece.

Benefit of it was that it also fir the maxi cosi pebble plus car seat using adapters. And if you’re going to have babies close together then you can change it into a double (though we’ve not figured out whether our DC is too big to do this yet).

Def think about how much room it takes up in boot of car and how easy it is to assemble/disassemble. Width is another consideration if you shop a lot as some are too wide for doorways(!)

I have to admit I was a bit envious of other mums who had nice new expensive prams as we had been more practical and decided it was pointless spending upwards of£1k on a pram which was going to get trashed in baby sick, milk and battered travelling (as we travel a lot) and that soon wore off. We bought from someone I vaguely knew (knew her sister) and paid £350 which included base, lie flat, 2 x seats, rain cover, foootmuff and 2 x adapters.

Also next to me is fab we did buy that new and will use for number 2. We had a separate cot in lounge which friend had given us and just bought a new mattress. That was invaluable as we kept DC in there when napping in day and until we went to bed as they’re not meant to be in a separate room to you until 6 months

I was initially envious of friends with expenducr prams (I have a maxicosi adorra) but when I saw my friend having to take the wheels off her silver cross to make it fit into her car while it was raining and her baby was screaming, I didnt feel so jealous of my one handed fold-down bog standard looking buggy. We still use ours nearly every day, and I also used the lie down bit every day for months (my baby preferred sleeping by herself, not on me). Always go for what practically fits you, not what has nicest handle.

I had a random bleed when I went to the loo last night - fresh red blood including (I think) a clot. There was no pain before it but I had cramping overnight. Now spotting red when I wipe. Obviously convinced it’s over. I’ve had 4 precious miscarriages but they were all pre-6 weeks and that issue is now treated so I’d naively hoped this one would be ok after good scans at 6 and 8 weeks. The EPU is closed for the bank holiday so the hospital has told me to go to A&E if I want to see someone today, or wait until tomorrow. I don’t know what to do. Just feel so miserable.

Oh @HarrietM87 sorry that must be really worrying for you. If it helps, I’ve heard A&E departments are very quiet at the moment.

@HarrietM87 sorry to hear that :( quite a few people on here have had bleeds and all been okay! Once you have a heart beat at 8 weeks the MC rate drops to 2% fingers crossed xx

@harrietm87 I’m so sorry that you’re bleeding, it’s a very scary time. I’ve got everything crossed for you that it’s nothing serious x

Sorry to hear that @HarrietM87. I would go to a&e. I expect it is very quiet and fairly easy to maintain social distancing.

Oh @HarrietM87 I am sorry to hear that. My sister is an A&E nurse in London and although they are swamped with covid cases, their normal A&E is incredibly quiet. If you went in they would see you very quickly. They have separate sections for covid and non covid cases too so you wouldn't have to mix with sick people. It's up to you though.

@HarrietM87 fingers crossed it's all ok xx
Thank you so much for all the pram / cot advice, that really helps! Obviously websites are trying to sell you stuff and don't give the reality.

I'll definitely be looking at a next to me style cot, I imagine just being able to lean over and deal with a grizzly baby pays when sleep is at a premium!

I think I'll be using the pram on tarmac paths the most, maybe the odd walk on a bit of grass, no airports or real off-roading. But getting it easily in and out of the car is a must, I've got a pretty average size car (Hyundai ix20), hadn't thought about car seats! Had a google and gosh that's a can of worms

Pressed post too early! Lol

I had no idea that one brand of seat can fit and others won't, I thought they were all the same!

I think I will be looking for a lightweight buggy with a car seat attachment (like the Joie) first off (when I get to the second trimester and hopefully out of lockdown).

@KatieGlo I had a scoda fabia and found because my seats were a bit slanted I could only get 2 car seats to fit at a safe angle, but that was from going to a shop and the very knowledgeable guy there going through everything with me. I tried to figure it out online and just boggled myself I say just go to a shop that has good reviews in your local are at about 25-30 weeks and chat to them. Its insanely complicated online.

@HarrietM87 I am eyeing the bugaboo bee as I have a fiat 500 and read some reviews that it fits perfectly in the boot. Our other car is huge so whatever we buy will fit there. It is a bit expensive so when it's pram shopping time I'll see whatever they have that will fit my car, but glad to hear you can still use it 2 years on. make the investment worthwhile.

@KatieGlo I will probably get a sleepyhead to put the baby if I am on the sofa and keeping an eye, as I've read it's not safe at all to let baby sleep on it.

Unfortunately, there is no way I can have the baby in bed, my husband is a heavy sleeper and we have a tiny dog that sometimes almost gets squashed so I wouldn't feel safe with it in bed.

Yes @HarrietM87 best to go a&e. Good luck and please update us.