Pregnant after loss and dreaming of rainbows....

[Avocuddles]

Hi,

Starting a thread for ladies in early pregnancy after one or more miscarriages or stillbirths. A safe place to let off steam and hopefully grow healthy rainbows together......

Just spent £15 on a double pack of conception indicator tests as I’m dying to get the infamous 3+ - AIBU??

@Knotemma and @Nooodles glad you found the group. I've felt so much more validated since joining. It's nice to know that we are not alone in the journey and some of the somewhat crazy things we may be doing lol. Think you are both due around same time as me. I'm 6+3 today. Sending sticky bean vibes to all 🥰🤞🌈

It's definitely great to find a group who truly understand your fears and emotions, and it does make me feel a little more sane

Dp wanted me to do the next digital test, he couldn't get time off at short notice so wanted peace of mind I won't be dealing with bad news alone.

I took it when I got home around 5, and trembling whilst I waited we got 3+!!!

4 days after my 2-3 I'm feeling quite hopeful now, I know it doesn't rule out complications but Im allowing myself to believe this could finally be our rainbow baby

Hi everyone Avocuddles asked me to join this thread. It's exactly what I need at the moment! I will have a proper catch up soon but I wanted to jump on the thread and say hi. I have a son who is 2.5, this was my first pregnancy. I found out I was pregnant again in May last year and sadly had a TMFR at 13 weeks. I found out I was pregnant again on Christmas Day, just before my due date which was the best present. However from early January I started to have bleeding and it was much more than the spottting I had with my previous pregnancies. I went for an early scan when I should have been 6+6 adjusting for my cycle and I was measuring 4-5 weeks. I was so sure of my dates I thought that was it. The bleeding did stop but I was convinced it was an MMC. They booked me in for a second scan in 2 weeks and when I went back yesterday I got a huge shock when they said everything is ok, here's the heartbeat!! I'm still nervous as I am now measuring 8+1 when I thought I was 8+6 and I don't get how it suddenly caught up 1-2 weeks but the DR was happy with everything and the heartbeat was strong. I'll have another scan in 2 weeks as they have offered me the harmony test on the NHS and then I'll get the results and have the final scan on 25th February. Feels like a long way away. I am however trying to stay hopeful and positive, I feel like I've been given a second chance with this pregnancy.

Thanks for the welcome and positive thoughts everyone, hopefully I'll have good news to share on Friday.

@Seahawk80 after what must have been such a scary start that's brilliant news!

@Seahawk80 wishing you the best of luck and hoping everything is still great at next scan x

@Seahawk80 that's great, I hope the next scan is just as amazing x

@Knotemma congratulations, I hope this one continues to stick for you, I hope you see a beautiful heart beating on your scan. I had two breakfasts today too, because nausea kicked in and food was what it took to settle it, I was so happy to feel sick though I know from my daughter I might not be happy in a few weeks!

@nooodles congratulations, sending you positive vibes, I truly know the feeling, I hope this is your rainbow baby xx

Thank you @LouiseD2018 @SammiLou2312 and @Avocuddles - so glad I found this thread, it’s taken the edge off my anxiety already :) I really do hope this is my rainbow too.

Morning everyone, I promised myself that I wouldn’t drive myself mad with these things but surprise surprise I have. Got 2-3 weeks on my clear blue conception indicator today but I know for a fact I conceived 3 weeks 1 day again. Is this a bad sign or could it be that it took a few days for the sperm to fertilise the egg? And I’ll get 3+ at the weekend? 🤯🤞🏻

Sorry just catching up. @Seahawk80 so sorry to hear about your losses, I think we were on a previous thread/fb group previously (due jan 20)? But I left after my miscarriage in July. Great news about your recent scan, you must have been overjoyed 😊
@Nooodles totally with you on the bump, I had to do the bobble trick with my jeans yesterday as they were digging in. I didn’t have a proper bump till about 20 weeks with my son!!

@HighHopes20 they are notoriously unreliable so don't worry about it! Our natural levels can vary so much in the early days and of course it may also be that you conceived a little later than you think - don't forget sperm can hang around in your body for up to 5 days so you may have conceived several days after you DTD. If you want to do another make sure you wait a few days, but in the meantime just throw it away xx

@HighHopes20 @Seahawk80 I was also on the due Jan 20 thread though that feels like a very long time ago now. Hopefully this is the one that sees us through the duration......

@HighHopes20 our EPU advised against using them as they are unreliable and can cause unnecessary angst. Like previously mentioned the sperm may have hung around a bit to meet the egg a few days later. HCG levels can vary significantly in early pregnancy from person to person.
I have 1 last digital test but saving it for next Friday where I will be 6 weeks just to make sure enough time has lapsed.
@Nooodles I'm that bloated I have a mini bump.

@Seahawk80 massive congratulations that things seem to have turned around. What an awful few weeks though. what is the harmony test?

Thanks everyone. It certainly was very emotional at the scan. I went through a lot of tissues. The Dr and nurse were so lovely. I think the EPU must be a very hard place to work and it must be moments like that that make it worth it. They said it was great to start the day off on a positive note although anyone seeing me walk out in tears wouldn't have realised.

@HighHopes20 yes I was on the Jan 2020 thread too. I'm so sorry for your loss. I might be feeling anxious but it's nice to have a ray of hope and takes the edge off thinking I should have a newborn. Don't drive yourself mad with those tests, I think they are so imprecise. I remember at about 9 weeks witg DS I did a normal test and the line was really faint. Had the most horrible day until extensive googling revealed it is totally normal to get a faint line at that stage - it's called the hook effect.

@Nooodles I would really try to wait until at least 8 weeks after what happened to me. The Dr said just ovulating a couple of days later can mean you didn't conceive when you thought and make up to a weeks difference in your dates depending on when everything happened. I know it's so so hard to wait though.

I just got my booking in appt in the post. Feel a bit meh about it as I remember going in last time and discussing the birth etc (I'll have a c section as I had a traumatic labour with DS and then emergency c) so they have to go over the pros and cons and then it was all for nothing. I'll just ask them to keep it brief.

Having my car MOT'd today which at least gives me something else to worry about!

@Sunflower1608 the harmony test is a non invasive test for downs / Edwards and Patau. You have a blood test at 10 weeks and they send it to the US for testing. You then get the results at 12 weeks and for downs it is 99%. It costs around £400 privately. My hospital offers it free if you get high odds at your 12 week scan but given my history of having bad odds twice (1/13 for DS and 1/9 last time) I just felt I couldn't go through the stress again of getting low odds, having a CVS and then waiting for the results. I was prepared to pay but they have agreed to do the test at 10 weeks. I think it helps that I made a complaint about my last 12 week scan as the attitude of the sonographer was appalling from the start.

Harmony is quite popular with "older" mums, I'm 39 now, as your odds on the NHS tests will always be high.

Congratulations @Seahawk80

We will be having the NIPT but our hospital didn't pay for it last time when we had a high nuchal so they're definitely not going to this time.
Better start saving 😂

Thanks for the reassurance @Avocuddles @Sunflower1608 @Seahawk80 I’ll wait till Sunday I think because that will be 3 weeks 4 days after we dtd so hopefully I’ll be 5 weeks (3+) by then.
I think because I’ve only ever got a 3+ with my son it will give me a bit of relief and I’ll be able to work out roughly when I’m 8 weeks to book our first scan. Oh god reading that back I sound crazy 😝

Morning! What a great thread :) I've been lurking for a bit and have literally made an account in order to join!

My story: I had a complicated first pregnancy, but very lucky to have had a healthy baby. I was pregnant for the second time last summer, but had an emergency operation early on in the pregnancy for a tumour. The baby survived, amazingly, and I had several weeks of scans with a healthy heartbeat. Then the day I returned to work I started bleeding, and a scan confirmed I'd lost the baby. I had surgical management. Now pregnant for the third time (think I'm due the same day as you, @Avocuddles) and finding things pretty hard... Like every lady on this board, I'm terrified each time I go to the toilet, terrified of each twinge, and terrified if the symptoms abate for half an hour Also like you @HighHopes20 did a CB digi this morning and got 2-3 rather than 3+.... Have my first scan on Saturday to rule out an ectopic , which I'm high-risk for courtesy of the operation in the summer.

Gentle congrats to everyone, and great to have other ladies in the same situation. Such a tricky time of pregnancy, especially if you're not telling other people just yet.

Not amazing news my end. Nothing was visible. Its being treated as PUL. The one hope is that it's very early ie my short bleed early Jan could have been a period.
At this stage she doesn't think miscarriage because no bleeding, cramping. She can't rule out growth where it shouldn't be until they can see something.

They took bloods, taking more Saturday and I'm to call them Monday for further instructions following test.

My positivity has nosedived I can't lie, I can't see how I could have got such a strong test midcycle if I'm that early... It seems the least likely thing to me.

Oh Louise that's devastating news and a worry over the next few days for you. We all need to hold out hope that it's too early to see on the scan.

Oh gosh @LouiseD2018 I'm so sorry you've had a worrying scan. Fingers crossed that baby is just being shy. How far along should you be?

We were not sure, I tested strong Positive midcycle. We contemplated very early ovulation around 15th Jan or very late around 3rd Jan.
My concern is with hcg the level its at on 3+ according to cb website suggests its too high for me to be so early that its not visible unless possibly multiple pregnancy but even then its above what's logged as expected range for my early date. Early could be as little as 3 weeks, late should be 5 weeks.

I know I have to prepare for the worst really, I couldn't handle the fall if I built myself up too high. My heart sank in that waiting room I just wanted to disappear.

@louised2018
Really sad to read your update but still holding out hope for you. 🤞🏻

That's such difficult news Louise (don't know why but I can't tag you). The waiting around is bloody awful. Fingers crossed you get some good blood test results back and things are ok. I understand what you mean about trying not to build yourself up to high or getting to excited. Sending you lots of positive thoughts xx