Pregnant after loss and dreaming of rainbows....

[Avocuddles]

Hi,

Starting a thread for ladies in early pregnancy after one or more miscarriages or stillbirths. A safe place to let off steam and hopefully grow healthy rainbows together......

I’m so sorry @Pippop21 I hope you’re at home being looked after. I don’t know about tests as I’ve just had one loss, how old are you? I’ve read of at least a couple of people who got more extensive testing than normal for two losses due to age (older so less time to waste). Sending lots of kind thoughts your way xx

@tmc14 i wish i was, in in work believe it or not! Have a mortgage to pay and cant afford the time off 😭

Im 34 hun xx

@Pippop21oh poor you. I was in work when I was bleeding heavily (work outside, no nearby toilet!) I powered through but looking back it seemed a bit ridiculous. But you just get your game face on and get on with it, don’t you?!
Ah, maybe at 34 they won’t see it as ‘urgent’ enough... but always worth asking, and if wiser people than me can give suggestions then it helps to go armed with what you want.

@TunnocksTcake that’s so nice, so reassuring to let yourself just sit with the worry for a minute and have permission.

@Pippop21 when I started to miscarry before six weeks I went to my GP and he booked me into the EPU for when I would be six weeks. They just did a pregnancy test and sent me on my way but it was good to have it confirmed and to be able to move on. (Although the nurse was less than sympathetic! Was glad to have my partner with me.)

@Pippop21sorry that you're going through this again. I would agree that making a GPS appointment is a good idea, if nothing else it makes sure that the details are recorded, as most trusts won't look into recurrent miscarriage until 3 consecutives, which is awful. You should still get checked out properly though, ideally a scan to make sure exactly what's going on and make sure you're ok physically. I know it's hard but do try to take some time to look after yourself, and if you think it will help seek some counselling support (my employer has a health Nd wellbeing phone line that I used quite a lot, it just helped me to talk it through with a stranger). Be kind to yourself and take care x

@Pippop21 sorry you are going through this, it totally sucks. With testing as others have said it totally depends on where you live. We went to the Dr after our second (first was MMC, foetus stopped growing at 6/7 weeks but found at 12 week scan, second was v early 5 week MC) and I had to insist they recorded it, she kept insisting it was 'just a chemical' and told me not to test too early next time. We were about to book in for private tests, but got pg immediately after that with this pregnancy.
Definitely go to the Dr though and make sure its recorded at least so there is a record. Can you self refer to EPU at all?

Hi, no i dont think i can self refer here, its all got to be done via a health professional, its like a full on period now so i'll contact the doctor early next week and make an appointment xx

Had my scan today. Saw a tiny blob with a heartbeat. I measured 6 weeks 4 days. I was so relieved, although it's been short lived as I've been ill the rest of the day. I have a cough and the chills - now I'm worried being ill will harm the baby. I suspect it's some sort of virus that I've picked up. I googled being ill in early pregnancy and now I'm worried it will affect the baby in a bad way. Ah no respite from the worry!

Hi everyone, and welcome to everyone new

@Pippop21 so sorry

Not been the best day today. Hospital called to say harmony results are in, I felt sick when she said "unfortunately " but it was to say the test was inconclusive. So it's not the worst news and doesn't indicate a problem. It just happens 5% of the time. I just feel gutted, we are back to square one. Hospital have been great and seeing me at 11 tomorrow to repeat test and do a scan. I'll be 11+4 so we can check the nuchal and least have an idea. I've been so anxious and I'd been managing it by counting down the days so just feel knocked for six.

@Pippop21 so sorry to hear 😞

Oh @Pippop21 I'm so sorry you're going through this.

@Seahawk80 I know they say no news is good news, but being stuck in limbo is just emotionally exhausting. Glad you're getting seen tomorrow.

Still having a small amount of spotting daily. Its been 5 days of it. Got my scan at 9am to check all is ok. My partner is really anxious, said even though he's terrified of twins that he would be devestated if we lost them now and doesn't know of he could try again after losing 3.

@Seahawk80 sorry you've had an inconclusive result, hope the scan tomorrow gives you some reassurance.
I had a long chat with my midwife and the hospital screening coordinator yesterday and I think I'm going to have the combined test, then the NIPT if the results aren't conclusive. They can do it the next day if I wish, just waiting for the scan date now, I'm hoping it's no later than 12 weeks as would like to let our families know on Mother's Day if things are looking ok. It still feels a long long way off....

@Aria2015 glad your scan went well. I've only just shaken off a stinking cold that lasted a good couple of weeks - the best thing you can do is listen to your body and get as much rest as possible. The baby should be fine, it's so hard to avoid catching things at this time of year. If you haven't had one already though it's worth asking your GP about a flu jab.

@Pippop21 so sorry you're going through this, and your previous experiences sound traumatic and badly supported. In my area you need three losses to be referred for testing regardless of age (I'm 36), but some areas do refer after two losses so worth asking. I'm another one hoping that it's third time lucky for me, I'm 8 +3 now and further along than ever before so fingers crossed...... Try to focus on the fact that the odds are still in your favour for the next one to work out. The past five weeks have gone so, so slowly and I still feel terrified that things could go wrong at any minute, but a new pregnancy means a new egg, a new chance, and hopefully the next one will work out for you.

@TunnocksTcake I love the quote you shared, it's completely right that we often focus on the negative stories and experiences we hear about, when what we really need are some positive stories to draw on. I hope this board brings lots of positive stories in the coming months.

@sallywinter @Knotemma I love a good read too - what are your favourites / guilty pleasures?
In terms of distractions it's really difficult to not think about the pregnancy every minute of every day. My work is really busy at the moment which helps but I also worry that the stress isn't good for the baby. It's a double edged sword!

Thank you everyone 💋💋 im ok, gutted but ok xxxx

@Avocuddles glad you had a good long chat with the midwife and that you have a plan in place.

I'm a real fantasy nerd so currently reading my way through all of Tamora Pierce's stuff, it's young adult fantasy and really easy reading. When I'm done with her I'm going to start working my way through our Terry Pratchett collection again, I've read most of them so many times they're like old friends 😂.

We're having a private scan tomorrow evening, which I've got mixed emotions about. But because we were measuring smaller than expected when we had the early scan I just can't wait another 3 weeks to see if things are progressing as expected. I've chosen a local independent place and there sonographer still works part time for the NHS which makes me feel a bit more comfortable, as do the reviews. I'm hoping all goes well and we can just try to have a nice time.

@Knotemma good luck for tomorrows scan! Fingers crossed baby has had a growth spurt xx

@Knotemma good luck with today’s scan xx

@Aria2015 I’m glad your scan went well. I’ve got a bad cold at the moment too, have a poorly 2 year old to look after & am running a 10k tomorrow for charity. I know how you feel about being anxious that illness might affect the baby, everything causes stress!!

I’m 6w1d, nausea started this morning and I’m completely exhausted... but I guess that’s a good sign!

Good luck @Knotemma

I feel pretty terrible. Hardly slept and just feel sick now. I just can't imagine things being ok.

@Seahawk80 I’m so sorry the results were inconclusive. It’s so hard, especially when you were so desperate for the results. I’m keeping everything crossed the scan all looks good. There’s no reason to suggest it won’t be. Remember what the others have said about this is not last time, this is different. Sending hugs xx

Thanks @tmc14 hopefully the nuchal looks good today. I'm just dreading it as with DS and last time the nuchal was high so I've never had it look good. Also I just really hoped we wouldn't be going down the "nuchal guesswork" road. I think I also feel terrified as I'm not sure what will happen today. They have agreed to scan and re do harmony but it may be a few days too early to do the full 12 week nuchal scan but it may not. So right now I'm in total limbo. Will update later once I've had the scan.

@Seahawk80 good luck this morning. Im glad they were able to fit you in so quickly to get scanned. Inconclusive may just mean there was an issue processing the blood, so hopefully if they try again you will get a solid answer. Thinking of you

@Aria2015 so glad your scan went well. Im sure the baby will be fine, especially this early on. Rest up and take care of yourself.

I've woken up with slightly lessened boob pain this morning, started to freak out then pulled myself together and decided to instead take advantage of it and go to the gym. Feel so much better for going, need to get there more often but I've been sleeping sooo badly. Last night was the first I have slept through the night without a wee in weeks as well!!
Must remind myself that the placenta starts to take over at 8 weeks (which I am now) so the symptoms will change and lessen over the coming weeks and that's ok. Still feeling nauseous anyway!

@Knotemma good luck this evening, the measurements can be so subjective at this stage, I'm sure it will have grown loads

@Seahawk80 I hope today goes well, it must be awful having this period of limbo with the harmony test. I've just had a look in my leaflet from the midwife and that says nuchal can be done between 11 and 13 weeks, so hopefully they can do it properly today.

Thanks everyone for the well wishes, we were measuring about 5 days smaller than expected and because we were away for new year I wasn't measuring, so I could have ovulated a bit later. In my logical brain I know that a couple of days that early is probably nothing to worry about, but I'm not exactly feeling logical at the minute.
In more positive news with the new tablets as long as I don't try to do anything more than wander round the house I'm a lot less ill. I've managed 3 meals this week which is quite exciting.

Just had our scan which showed both twins growing well. There was also evidence of a subchorionic hemorrhage so signed off work for 2 week and told to rest. Feel slightly reassured they are ok. But multiple pregnancies are higher risk of miscarriage anyway. And having a hemorrhage makes me 3x more likely to 😔

Ladies with scans today - Good luck, I'll be thinking of you! ❤️

@Knotemma thanks. If it helps I'm 13 days behind lmp and scan at 8+1 and 10+2 showed perfect growth so more than likely fine x

Can't quite believe this but it went really well! Redid harmony bloods and scan perfect. Nuchal 1.47 at 11+4 (last time was 3mm at 11+5) and nasal bone present which is a good sign. Still a bit small to do full 12 week scan and they just squeezed me in today but I'm going back on Tuesday as booked and we'll take it from there. At least I'll have harmony in the pipeline if I come back higher risk and they are bringing a top consultant in for my scan if needed.