The Graduates of TTC after pregnancy loss thread #6 - 🐧 The Penguin Huddle 🐧

[KnitKitty]

This is a safe space and supportive thread for anyone who is pregnant following a loss. We all understand the worry and anxiety that can come from being pregnant again following miscarriage/stillbirth.

Please feel free to join, even if you were not on the original TTC thread.

Starting the roll call copied from the last thread. Not everyone is on there, so please add to it/update/edit.
Also, thought it might be fun if we add Girl/Boy/Surprise on there too, so we can see who's expecting what

@Amanda81, 38, EDD 27/12/19
@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue, 37, EDD 03/01/20
@Laney79, 40, EDD 06/01/20
@Bluebelltulip, 29, EDD 09/01/20
@KnitKitty, 32, EDD 29/01/20 - Girl
@UnicornsandRainsbows1, 29, EDD 29/01/2020
@Newbie21, 38, EDD 06/02/20
@InDreamland, 39, EDD 18/02/20
@Tina363,29, EDD 26/02/20
@Frillyfarmer, 29, EDD 28/02/20
@Strawberry, 28, EDD 08/03/20
@Ginmonkey84, 34, EDD 16/03/20
@DuvetCaterpillar, 34, EDD 27/03/2020
@ChikiTIKI , 29, EDD 04/04/2020
@Navy123, 29, EDD 10/04/20
@Catconfusion, 40, EDD 12/04/20
@Janey15, 34, EDD 13/04/20
@TinyPaws, 33, EDD 18/04/20
@Flyfisherlady, 37, Edd 24/04/20
@Dimblebimble, 29, EDD 29/4/20
@FirstTimeMama91, 28, EDD 06/05/2020
@SunshineCrocodile, 37, EDD 4/6/2020
@TwittleBee , 25, EDD 25/06/20

And a shout-out to the Mamas who have already had their beautiful babas!
@Boboelephant, @Yukka, @Melpops36, @Beaglemum93 and a special mention for our hero mum @Squiff70 who we continue to keep in our thoughts and prayers.

Anybody had gest diabetes. I measured myself and I'm 8.5 after eating. Should be 7.8 or less and 6.5 in morning--should be 5 5. Okay so not massively over, but sounds like I've got it. Still waiting for hospital. I'm wondering what damage I could have caused being undiagnosed for goodness knows how long?! 😭

@rubyroot thank you, that really put my mind at ease! I read the website you talked about and it panicked me so it's good to know it's a load of rubbish. Annoying that it comes up so high on google though for something that is nonsense! Have you heard from the hospital yet? Definitely give them a ring to talk about the results you've had if they don't contact soon. How long after eating was your 8.5?

@InDreamland I know what you mean about needing to be productive - I really struggle with feeling like I should be doing more vs needing to chill out a bit. My DS has just started nursery 2 mornings a week so I can have a bit of a break before baby comes but I use them to rush around and try and get 100 things done! I'm finding having an ongoing list helpful though - if I can tick a couple of things off then I feel like I've been productive and relax the rest of the time. RE tens machine I'm planning to keep mine out (when I get round to ordering it!) to use in early labour - what I've heard is they are most effective if you start using them early on.

@Twittlebee glad you've got a nice consultant and that things seem to be settling. How are you with bed rest? I know I'd find it a struggle!

So I've had results. 5.3 before and 9.4 afterwards. Cut off is 7.4😭.
A bit worried about damage I've done, but midwife says it will be fine apparently as didn't have diabetes before pregnancy. Although I'm wondering if I did now.

@Rubyroost Oh bummer. Still at least now you know you can do something about it!

Yes I'm happy to change my diet of course just fretting about any damage I've done. Midwife is very reassuring and says all okay if I get it under control. However, I've googled and I don't trust them

36 +1 and still testing negative for GD and PE so it looks like I might be able to do this without an induction unless she's really late! We're head down but not engaged, and I've made it to my due date month 💞

@Twittlebee sorry to hear about the recent issues but I’ve just read your update and it sounds promising. The main thing is you’ve got a consultant you trust who will give you the best possible care.
@TinyPaws @Rubyroost I’ve got gestational diabetes. So far baby is measuring fine but when I first found out I was very upset. But, since I’ve been testing this week I’ve managed to get my levels under control so I’m hoping I will remain diet controlled. I didn’t find the fact sheet hugely helpful and got most of my tips from other people with it. You need to have a high fat, high protein, low carb diet. If you have a carb like granary bread (even wholemeal isn’t great) pair it with high fat/protein. So I have cheese on toast for breakfast, a salad with tuna/chicken for lunch, stir fry/meat veg sweet potato for dinner. I snack on oat cakes with cream cheese. Also key is to exercise after eating- so walk up the stairs or do a pregnancy workout, helps to burn off the sugar. Drinking plenty of water also helps. Don’t go hungry otherwise liver will overcompensate and do a big glucose dump. Having something to eat before bed helps. Avoid cereals. Small meals and snack often. What works for one person may not work for another, it’s trial and error and you do get more resistant to insulin as the pregnancy progresses. Please don’t feel bad or worry you have hurt baby- they have caught it now and you will get the very best care. There are scary things on the internet but just ignore them- most women do very well with GD and have healthy babies. They put the risks on there so women take it seriously which of course you will do.

Sorry for monologue! Please let me know if I can help any further or PM me. It will all be ok x

Thanks @Mistymeow that's really helpful. I'm guessing I'm fretting because they have caught it so late and I already have a massive baby, measured five weeks ahead (apart from legs) Though I'm confused beacsue abdomen and head are measuring in line with each other and I don't think gest diabetes affects head. My consuktant appt will hopefully help on Tuesday as will be having a private scan. But that seems so long away!!
Anyhow I thought I had it cracked yesterday as had my levels at 5.9 after eating lunch. But then had dinner (a recipe I found on line with sweet potato) and after two hours my levels were 8 which I was really disappointed with me. I wonder if my monitor is slightly put as hospital tested fasting level at 5.3 and its been 6.5 and 6.0 when I've tested with a monitor. I have to admit though the strips are two years past expiry date as I bought it with my last pregnancy (when I thought I had it) and never used it. Wish I'd checked earlier now though. I asked so many times for a test and kept getting turned out. Being diagnosed at almost 33 weeks does worry me.

@Rubyroost how far along are you again?

With my first, I was diagnosed with GD at 32 weeks, he was 95th centile and then off the scale, measured huge on all the growth scans and was induced early because of size - it really affected my mental state and I felt quite sad about the prospect of birthing a toddler. He was 7lbs8, my GD was diet managed rather than meds and honestly their scaremongering on size wasn't helpful. From what I understand, the growth scans past 30weeks are notoriously inaccurate. I know that won't stop you worrying because every pregnancy is different, but that's just my experience. X

I actually asked if I should be tested at 20 weeks because baby's abdomen was on 98th centile then, doctors said no need.

Now at 28 weeks baby is still on 98th centile for abdomen, 95th centile for head and 96th centile for estimated foetal weight (i.e. measuring 3-4 weeks ahead) plus mild polyhydramnios and have been referred for an urgent glucose tolerance test plus weekly scans.

They seem to have switched very rapidly from "everything's fine" to "here's all the tests, now panic slightly".

Also @Mistymeow thanks for the tips! I'm surprised to find I might have gestational diabetes as I don't have any risk factors, but IIRC I don't think you did either?

Congrats @frillyfarmer on reaching your birth month! And to @InDreamland too! I can now officially say that I'm due next month :).

Sorry to hear you are worrying @Rubyroost and @TinyPaws, but it sounds like you got some good tips from @Mistymeow and hopefully can keep it under control with monitoring. It must be difficult to have to watch your diet so closely like that when hugely pregnant, I'm usually a healthy eater and I don't like sweets, but I have been down more sugar this pregnancy on a regular basis to try to get baby to move. My problems seem to be the opposite, smaller growth than I'd like and not as active as I want. Having a quiet morning, so currently downing fruit juice like there is no tomorrow :/. Pregnancy is so stressful!!! Sometimes I wonder if the anxiety will get better.

Does anyone recommend lanolin cream for the hospital bag? It's 10 pounds at tesco, seems pricey, but I guess it can be used both for bf and as a nappy cream? As in, I could just buy this one tube for everything? Correct me if I'm wrong here! Also, do you need special maternity pads or are the super absorbent overnight ones fine?

Hi thanks for all your replies @frillyfarmer @TinyPaws. I'm now 33 weeks today and was diagnosed Friday after test on Tuesday. Weight was apparently 6lb 3 on Monday. I'm hoping they are put on growth. Been measuring bug since 20 weeks like you @TinyPaws.

My bmi is 22.5 and I don't have risk factors either. Apparently my age does increase the risk but I'm not sure it's identified as risk factor.

@sadtoday21 sorry you're having the opposite worry. It's a stressful time isn't it?

On an unrelated note, I've been thinking about the location of this thread. I actually think it's really inappropriate that it's been moved to "birth clubs" as we know all too well that a pregnancy doesn't necessarily lead to a birth. If it'd still been in birth clubs when I joined there's no way in hell I'd have posted on it as after 3 losses my expectation was more of another miscarriage rather than a birth.

Hi

@mistymeow @TinyPaws @Rubyroost my GTT was fine but at last appt baby has a big abdomen, Consultant was concerned but then said not concerned. I have bought a blood glucose monitor off of amazon and have been tracking bloods - some days they seem slightly up on a morning reading Ie 5.4 or 5.5 but otherwise are normal during the day, and are in bounds fine 1 hour 2 hours after eating. So am just trying to eat a little better, minimal sweets, changes brekkie to peanut butter on granary etc.
I would welcome the sharing of diet tips from
You ladies
. @Rubyroost try not to panic about the scan results as these are notoriously inaccurate as far as I can tell.

@sadtoday sorry you are having this anxious time - pregnancy is such a worry. Some
Days I find baby is just a bit quieter and I find it really disconcerting!

I am planning to wash my few newborn outfits I've bought and start on hospital bags - scary x

@Tinypaws I agree, I didn't object when it got moved from pregnancy to antenatal clubs too much but now it's been renamed birth clubs I disagree with it. I would have really struggled to join too.

@sadtoday21 maternity ones are recommended as it's easier to monitor loss and helps healing if you have stitches.

@rubyroost try not to worry about before diagnosis as you can't change it, I hope you can control it though.

Thanks @Bluebelltulip I just feel so bad. I had a sweet tooth this pregnancy as I did my last and had least a chocolate bar a day and when my little boy was 2 I had quite a few slices of his chocolate cake. I've had a fair bit of sweet stuff as well as white carbs and sweet muesli in the morning. 😭I guess I did this in my last pregnancy and all was okay. I know I can't undo it now, it's what I do from now on that's important. Just been for 20 min walk. I can't manage much more as my bump really hurts but I'll try and go for another later today.

Regarding location of the thread, it does make it hard for people who have experienced loss to find. Is it easy to move it back to pregnancy so other ladies can join?

@Rubyroost If there's a consensus that this thread would be better in the pregnancy section I guess we can report it and ask MNHQ to move it back then it's up to them whether they choose to move it or not.

Well I can't see anyone objecting. Shall we ask for it to be moved there? It does make sense. There's a separate thread for the ladies who have now given birth which we can all join 🤞 when we are ready.

Completely agree the location of the thread is now inappropriate. I wouldn't have joined it here at all

OK I have reported to MNHQ. Hopefully they will move it back.

Yes I agree, it’s not a birth club. The thread was created for nervous women, and they would naturally gravitate towards the pregnancy board.

@frillyfarmer so glad everything is going well!
@sadtoday21 thank you, I hope you get some more reassurance at your next scan. You deserve to enjoy the rest of your pregnancy.
@fnej01 happy to share tips! Sounds like your blood glucose is normal. Looks like the big no nos are the white carbs- white bread, potatoes, pasta. Obviously chocolate and sugary drinks push readings up, also fresh juice and citrus fruit. Bananas too. Berries are much better.
@TinyPaws no real risk factors apart from being over 35. My sister did have it but she was high risk because of her medication. My BMI was 19 pre pregnancy. But it’s all down to how your body deals with insulin in pregnancy, and you could be the healthiest person alive and still get it. Nothing you could have done, so no one should blame themselves (I did at first but midwife reassured me). It’s good they are monitoring your fluid levels. When it’s diagnosed they really do swoop in and take extra care of you, and that can only be a good thing.
@rubyroost I also get the high readings in the evening. I limited my carb intake and upped my protein, as I think my blood glucose gets gradually higher throughout the day. Then afterwards I do a ten minute pregnancy safe workout. It’s working so far. Also with the exercise I’ve found my mood has improved and feel fitter, so it’s also a good prep for birth. Don’t beat yourself up about what you ate before. Some people do have big babies and don’t have GD. I’m sure the consultant will reassure you.

Thanks @Mistymeow your posts are helpful. I got quite stressed today and impatient with my little one and then ended up having a little cry. I'm so pathetic. I've got some grains like lentils and quinoa and chickpeas (not a grain I know). etc and I'm going to have small portions with whatever protein. Tonight is smoked peppered mackeral which I'm hoping is okay. Obviously I'll also add the veg. I need to look uo the pregnancy friendly exercises. Because I'm so big and also breech my bump is hurting quite a bit, Ive also developed a bit of a pain in my joints in one of my legs, I've got vagiba ache and my bump does ache when I walk so it's quite hard to do moderate exercise. I'm hoping a couple of walks a day will help.

@Rubyroost you’re not pathetic, I felt exactly the same way. It’s completely natural to feel like that because you’re a good mum who loves her baby, so of course you want to protect them. I feel a failure every time I get a high reading and blame myself, that I’m hurting baby. But we must stop doing this. It’s the pregnancy hormones that are resisting insulin production. It’s not you. You’ll be so well looked after. They say 30 mins brisk walk a day is the best exercise. I’m at the diabetic clinic tomorrow so I’ll let you know what they say.

Unbelievably I seem to be encountering some work place bullying. Yes, a woman in her third trimester is getting bullied by other women! I won’t bore you with the story but to summarise someone complained to my senior manager about a piece of work I didn’t do because I was off sick. Not just sick, hospitalised sick. I was incredibly hurt because they knew I was ill and I absolutely bust a gut to deliver their main campaign which I got no thanks for. My bosses have backed me fully. It’s not my main career and I’m leaving soon but I’ve decided to not let them extend my contract. Even though I could do with the money, my health is more important.