The Graduates of TTC after pregnancy loss thread #6 - 🐧 The Penguin Huddle 🐧

[KnitKitty]

This is a safe space and supportive thread for anyone who is pregnant following a loss. We all understand the worry and anxiety that can come from being pregnant again following miscarriage/stillbirth.

Please feel free to join, even if you were not on the original TTC thread.

Starting the roll call copied from the last thread. Not everyone is on there, so please add to it/update/edit.
Also, thought it might be fun if we add Girl/Boy/Surprise on there too, so we can see who's expecting what

@Amanda81, 38, EDD 27/12/19
@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue, 37, EDD 03/01/20
@Laney79, 40, EDD 06/01/20
@Bluebelltulip, 29, EDD 09/01/20
@KnitKitty, 32, EDD 29/01/20 - Girl
@UnicornsandRainsbows1, 29, EDD 29/01/2020
@Newbie21, 38, EDD 06/02/20
@InDreamland, 39, EDD 18/02/20
@Tina363,29, EDD 26/02/20
@Frillyfarmer, 29, EDD 28/02/20
@Strawberry, 28, EDD 08/03/20
@Ginmonkey84, 34, EDD 16/03/20
@DuvetCaterpillar, 34, EDD 27/03/2020
@ChikiTIKI , 29, EDD 04/04/2020
@Navy123, 29, EDD 10/04/20
@Catconfusion, 40, EDD 12/04/20
@Janey15, 34, EDD 13/04/20
@TinyPaws, 33, EDD 18/04/20
@Flyfisherlady, 37, Edd 24/04/20
@Dimblebimble, 29, EDD 29/4/20
@FirstTimeMama91, 28, EDD 06/05/2020
@SunshineCrocodile, 37, EDD 4/6/2020
@TwittleBee , 25, EDD 25/06/20

And a shout-out to the Mamas who have already had their beautiful babas!
@Boboelephant, @Yukka, @Melpops36, @Beaglemum93 and a special mention for our hero mum @Squiff70 who we continue to keep in our thoughts and prayers.

Hi all - sorry for my absence! Have had a few issues with Little Brother's weight and feeding and we found out he had a tongue tie. Can't be bothered to type it all out again, but I've updated on the Graduate Graduates thread! Luckily all seems to be getting better now so that's the main thing! Just adjusting to life with two kids, which is relentless but lovely!

Can't believe how far along you all are now!!

I second hospital wards being boiling! And definitely don't rely on them for maternity pads - mine certainly didn't offer any. One thing I find useful during any hospital stay is a pair of flip flops. I got a £1 pair from primark which I liked wearing to the toilets or in the shower (as I find they can be a bit grim) and just threw away afterwards. And cheap big black knickers as someone said. Also in the vain of germs - antibacterial hand cream! I carry that everywhere any way!

Congratulations @Lozzak87! I'm sending love and hope your little girl continues to do well.

Batch cooking is a great idea @InDreamLand - so good to not have to worry about food in the first few weeks! I'm so excited for you now! Can't wait to find out whether you're having a boy or girl!

@rubyroot sorry you have this anxiety. Little Brother measured consistently huge throughout this pregnancy and you will remember I worried about the same things! All was fine though and chances are it will be for you too!

Hope you're ok @Frillyfarmer? Is your DS excited about having a little sister?

Sorry you've struggled so much @navy123- you're doing brilliantly and almost there!

@TwittleBee you're nearly halfway! Sorry you're still cranky but pleased you're being monitored and looked after.

Sorry to anyone I've missed! Sending love you you all xxx

Thanks @MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue hopefully it will just be fine and another of our similarities as well as the piles! How big was your dd, my boy was a healthy weight, but not massive like this one. it's the way the weight has just shot up. I mean estimated at 6lb 3 at 32 weeks! That's not normal is it?! Hoe big will he be by the time he's finished?! Also the amniotic fluid worries me as its 21cm and polyhydriamnos is diagnosed at 24. And yes I've bloody googled. 😭 1 more week for my consuktant appt. Its a bit 9f money, but I'm hoping she can explain things and put my mind at rest. Or not, as the case may be.

@Navy123 lol that is a lot of meals!

@fnej01 didn't realise you can buy your own blood glucose monitor. Good though your consultant wasn't worried.

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue lovely to hear from you here and that DS is gaining weight and things are looking up. Hope you enjoy this precious time with both little ones. Most people think we're having a boy, less guesses for girl, who knows though, all these old wives tales about how I'm carrying (all front apparently and don't look pregnant from the back).

So today I can say I'm 37 weeks and Bubsy is full term. Unfortunately I've felt so nauseous today and all I've managed to do is a load of laundry. Had a good intention to do a final bit of batch cooking but felt so tired I sat on sofa and fell asleep. So annoyed with myself. Is it normal to feel so nauseous and tired at this stage? I didn't get up until 10:30am then sat in bed until just after 11am. Of course just not sleeping through the night and waking up every couple of hours. So today been a bit of a fail. How on earth do those with a toddler do late stages of pregnancy?

Haha I feel like that @indreeamland and I'm 32 weeks, its the acid reflux which is making me feel sick though. Though breech and supposedly a 6lb 3 baby may explain that. 😭So went in for my gtt today and was met with oh are you the one with the 6lb 3 baby who is 32 weeks! So yes seems I'm the talk of the hospital (okay so perhaps a bit dramatic--that particular section of the hospital) made me feel loads better about my anxiety. 😭
My toddler is easy to look after. It's bedtime and bathtime that are the issue when I have to lift him in and out the bath and then into his cot as I still have him in sleeping bags. Wrestling him into his sleeping bag is also hard going. But it's only when it gets to bed time that it becomes hard, and thats only a little bit. I'm looking forward to my day off tomorrow when I can spend time with the little darling.

I felt like that in the later stages @InDreamland and couldn't even nap as I had DD running round so make the most of it! It's hard going in the final weeks when you're big and tired. Regarding how you're carrying, I think it depends on the person and the wives tales are a load of bollocks! I carried all at the front with both my girl and boy so it really means nothing! So I'm going to go against the grain and guess girl for you!

@Rubyroost my DD was two weeks overdue and was 8lb 5oz, so not that big at all. Little Brother was 39 weeks (ELCS) and was 9lb 4oz! How are they calculating the weight this time? Scans are notoriously inaccurate and measuring fundal height is even worse! So there is a chance he's not that big. Try not to worry about the fluid. As long as they are keeping an eye on you. Do you think they may induce you early?

@Rubyroost or are you going for a section? Sure you were against induction after a crappy one (like me!)

Yeah I am. My boy was 42 weeks and 8lb so quite similar. He measured bigger on his scans though and I think that his placenta was wearing out a bit towards the end.

@InDreamland is deffo a boy.

I also carried all out in front with both pregnancies. I've been laid on the sofa the last 1 1/2 whilst my toddler brings over his books and puzzles to play. Hes currently making a mess and getting his toys out. I'm relaxing. 😂

Calculated from head, abdomen and femur measurements. Head and abdomen are now completely off the scale. Think they're measuring about 4/5 weeks ahead. 😬Femyr length is normal. I'm having an extra private scan in a week. I'm hoping the baby shrinks and she puts my mind at rest. V

Sorry for the selfish post ladies...bit worried. I had an emergency growth scan today and all looked fine but baby measuring only 4lbs 12 ounces at 33+5 weeks. So dropped from 60% to 34%. Is this ok? I have another scan in two weeks.

That's exactly why I hate growth scans @sadtoday21 puts so much worry in your mind.
Honestly, I don't think I'm in a position to give advice at the moment given I'm worrying so much about growth scans. Maybe ours put together just shows how inaccurate they are as @MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue suggested.
If you're worried have an interim scan in a week privately?

What I do remember though is my last pregnancy a very experienced private sonographer measured my baby's head and it measured 5 weeks behind. She said I don't like that measurement and then tried again. She said oh I prefer that one, it's much better and went with the second! Just goes to show how inaccurate they can be. I really should take my own advice though. Like I said I'm having a scan in a week with a fetal medicine specialist, because I'll go crazy with worry otherwise. Just hope she doesn't deliver any bad news. 😬

Sorry to only reply to @sadtoday21 - I am reading along but got home only half an hour ago and life has just been this level of busy so no time to reply (will do catch up Thursday hopefully when I'm off) - just wanted to say that's a better weight than mine at 33+4 which was only 4lb. I think it's more the trend which is important so it's good that they are rescanning you in a couple of weeks

@sadtoday21 what did the sonographer say? I had a growth scan on Monday and all was well- he said that if he had any concern he would refer me. Do you mind if I ask what the reason was for the emergency scan? Only I had a midwife who consistently measured my fundal height 5 weeks behind. It’s massively inaccurate as I found out, but it put me through an awful lot of anxiety. Your baby sounds like a good weight for the gestation and I firmly believe if they thought there was an issue you would be told. Why don’t you ask for a chat with the midwives, I felt much better after I did that.
@rubyroost I totally hear you on the growth scans! I must admit I feel very let down by the midwife who measured me so small and didn’t explain anything. It made me anxious all weekend. It sounds like your doctors are not concerned but are keeping a close eye, which can only be a good thing. I say that but I can’t take my own advice and constantly think the worst.

I’ve almost certainly got GD as my blood glucose is high and am seeing the diabetic midwife next week. I feel much better since changing hospitals and having a midwife who actually explained it all to me. It came as a shock because I don’t fit into the category, apart from being 36. I thought it was something I’d done but the midwife said absolutely not. So I feel better now. Baby is measuring fine for now and I’m hoping to control it with diet.

Thanks @strawberrye, really appreciate that. He was measuring above 60% at 20 week scan, 46.1% at 28 weeks, and now actually 34% at 33+5. But all the measurements taken today were above 50%, except for the femur length. And I thought 5 lbs was about average for 34 weeks, so he’s only 4 ounces under that. And placenta blood flow was fine. Could it be I’m not eating enough or not enough protein? 🥺

@Rubyroost you were so right about growth scans being worrying! I’m sorry you are worried about the opposite - it’s always something!! Hopefully the consultant can reassure you next week and (also telling myself this) people do say the measurements can be really inaccurate.

@InDreamland sorry to hear you are feeling sick, is it heartburn or ms? I’ve almost thrown up a few times lately from bad heartburn - even though I never had any ms in first trimester. And well done on the batch cooking! I’m so jealous of you being on mat leave and getting so organised, I’m working like crazy right now still and absolutely exhausted!

@Lozzak87 meant to say massive congrats on the birth and I’m so glad your little one is thriving. Sounds like it was a very scary time, but I’m glad things are looking better now Xxx.

@Mistymeow the sonographer just said that it was the low side of normal. They didn’t want to do any follow up actually, it just happens that I have a routine nhs scan at 36 weeks in two weeks anyway. The reason for the scan was reduced movement - My fundal height has actually been measuring fine this whole time, but agree with you that it’s very inaccurate anyway. I’m so sorry to hear about the GD but your midwife is absolutely right, it’s nothing you did and not your diet, you sound very healthy! What does that mean for you now? More monitoring? Thinking of you 🤗

Complete selfish post been admitted to hospital due to threatened late miscarriage. Baby all okay but cervix isnt looking great and having regular contractions

@Twittlebee is there anything they can do to stop them?

Not this early they have me on bed rest with codeine for the pain. If it does settle then theyll put a stitch in an possibly give me some pessaries but as soon as I start contracting theyll have to take stitch out again as can damage the cervix.

Just so hard as they've put me on a post natal ward so trying to sleep surrounded by crying newborns whilst I fear that I'll never experience my own baby like they all are.

@Twittlebee I have everything crossed for you that you can have the stitch. Being on post natal must be really hard and seems insensitive, I'm assuming it's because of space?

Thank you. I'm really hoping a stitch will work!

Yes no space anywhere else. I didnt feel like I could turn it down though and actually I didnt even know this was putting me till I walked onto the ward and saw where I was. First time I've been on this ward

@Twittlebee I really hope the stitch works. Sorry they've put you on the postnatal ward too, it's pretty insensitive...

For those of you who are worrying about growth scans. I had one sonographer who always said my DS was massive (over 90th percentile) and all the others said around the 70th. His predicted weight was an ounce heavier than he was at birth 9 days before he was born. It's really not reliable so try not to worry too much.

@TwittleBee sorry to hear you are going through a stressful time, I hope everything settles down for you and you can try and get some rest.
Hopefully if that was the only bed available at the time they should look into putting you on an ante natal ward this morning as it really is upsetting to be on a ward with so many mothers who have their babies with them. I was on the post natal ward after moving out of High dependency but luckily was put into a NICU bay where me and the other woman had babies on NICU but it was still hard. I was discharged home yesterday but was horrible leaving little Rose behind, she's absolutely smashing NICU currently but I'm so terrified and am just waiting for her to pick up an infection or have a bleed somewhere, I'm trying not to phone all day and night for updates!!
Anyway sending a massive hand hold and positive thoughts your way xxxx

Forgot to post this pic the other day... 1 week old today 😍💖

Thinking not you @Twittlebee and sending love and strength. I hope they move you to a different ward and above all, I hope Baby Twittle is ok xxx

Thanks @MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue, and glad to hear your little one is doing better! Glad to hear life with 2 is good too, hopefully I'll be asking for some tips soon!

@InDreamland sorry you've been feeling so tired, I'm 7 weeks behind you but also feeling completely wiped out - dreading it getting worse. Don't feel annoyed with yourself though, make the most of being able to sleep when you need to, it's what the start of mat leave is for.

Definitely agree with what people are saying about inaccurate scans - the human error can be huge but I've found they never want to acknowledge that that can be an issue.

@Twittlebee sorry to hear you're having contractions, and what a horrible ward to put you on. Fingers crossed it all stops soon. Can you ask to be moved in the morning?

@Lozzak87 gorgeous picture!