The Graduates of TTC after pregnancy loss thread #6 - 🐧 The Penguin Huddle 🐧

[KnitKitty]

This is a safe space and supportive thread for anyone who is pregnant following a loss. We all understand the worry and anxiety that can come from being pregnant again following miscarriage/stillbirth.

Please feel free to join, even if you were not on the original TTC thread.

Starting the roll call copied from the last thread. Not everyone is on there, so please add to it/update/edit.
Also, thought it might be fun if we add Girl/Boy/Surprise on there too, so we can see who's expecting what

@Amanda81, 38, EDD 27/12/19
@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue, 37, EDD 03/01/20
@Laney79, 40, EDD 06/01/20
@Bluebelltulip, 29, EDD 09/01/20
@KnitKitty, 32, EDD 29/01/20 - Girl
@UnicornsandRainsbows1, 29, EDD 29/01/2020
@Newbie21, 38, EDD 06/02/20
@InDreamland, 39, EDD 18/02/20
@Tina363,29, EDD 26/02/20
@Frillyfarmer, 29, EDD 28/02/20
@Strawberry, 28, EDD 08/03/20
@Ginmonkey84, 34, EDD 16/03/20
@DuvetCaterpillar, 34, EDD 27/03/2020
@ChikiTIKI , 29, EDD 04/04/2020
@Navy123, 29, EDD 10/04/20
@Catconfusion, 40, EDD 12/04/20
@Janey15, 34, EDD 13/04/20
@TinyPaws, 33, EDD 18/04/20
@Flyfisherlady, 37, Edd 24/04/20
@Dimblebimble, 29, EDD 29/4/20
@FirstTimeMama91, 28, EDD 06/05/2020
@SunshineCrocodile, 37, EDD 4/6/2020
@TwittleBee , 25, EDD 25/06/20

And a shout-out to the Mamas who have already had their beautiful babas!
@Boboelephant, @Yukka, @Melpops36, @Beaglemum93 and a special mention for our hero mum @Squiff70 who we continue to keep in our thoughts and prayers.

Mega congrats @Laney79! What a cutie!

Congrats @Laney79 what a beautiful photo!

@Twitwooo I'm doing my PhD now too and finding it a bit stressful on top of everything else. Trying so hard to finish before my due date, but my mind is less focused these days.

Had to go into the hospital for reduced movements today (30 weeks), so feel tired and drained now. Baby seemed ok on the ctg, but still feel worried. Wish they would have done a scan, but they only do that if you come in a second time. I feel like the end is so close, but still so far, it's really stressful. Just want to get this baby out healthily and safely, but still ten weeks left to go...

Hi ladies! Sorry not had a chance to catch up but need some advice please...

I’ve just received a letter with my results:

Is this low enough for T18 and T13?

Downs 1 in 33,000
T18 1 in 5,500
T13 1 in 2,600

It says my PAPP-A (Plasma protein A) is lower than it should be. It says they will arrange an extra scan at ... but haven’t put when! Further down it mentions 31 weeks. Anyone else had this?

Also says I need to start taking Asprin 75mg from now until birth. Is this normal aspirin or a special one?

Feeling quite anxious now I don’t know what this all means!

@RedRobin7 They look like really good scores!

I had low PAPP-A with my daughter, generally the majority of cases are fine and babies go to full term, but they like to keep an eye on it as sometimes it can indicate things like IUGR, possible preeclampsia and so on later on, but again it's a case by case thing 😊 In regards to aspirin, I've taken 2x75mg throughout this pregnancy as I developed severe preeclampsia last time, and probably should have taken it last time too as it might have helped. I think they prescribe it a lot more now and the more I've spoken to different midwives the more they kind of big it up with its benefits.

Oh, with scans, I had growth scans starting from 28 weeks, then every four weeks or so

@sadtoday21 and @Twitwoo I submitted my thesis at the end of November and hoping to have my viva early April. It's stressful while pregnant, I had my DD1 while I was researching and found going back quite hard. Very much looking forward to it being finished, I started in 2013.

@RedRobin7 75mg aspirin is getting fairly common in pregnancy, I was told to take it as DD1 was small for gestational age at birth. It's a lower dose than normal aspirin but you can buy it in the supermarket.

Congratulations @Laney79 on your beautiful little boy 🌈

32 + 1 and yesterday I really struggled with BH - I never had any significant ones with DS so it's flawed me a bit 😂 I'm also not sure whether I'm leaking. The last couple of weeks I've had a few damp knicker situations and again this morning when I've woken. It doesn't have any odour to it and it's nothing substantial but I wonder whether I ought to be speaking to a midwife about it?

@sadtoday21 and @Bluebelltulip how lovely to find more PhD companions. In my uni I always felt like I was literally the only person doing this!
I had my dd at the start of my third year, took a year off, got back full time while looking after her at home as couldn't afford/ didn't want nursery. My supervisor spent the whole time telling me to go part time before I have a breakdown and so eventually I did about six months later. I wanted to get the PhD done so i could find a job and have another baby but the part time thing put a spanner in the works for that. I had my miscarriage a year ago, hoping to take another maternity leave instead of having a baby once finished. That ship has also sailed and I waited a while longer so that the due date would be after my viva - which should be around Easter, @Bluebelltulip ! Then depending on corrections if I get away with just a few and baby stays put I can be totally done before my due date in late May, if not I'd take a short break and get it done after. I started mine in 2014 so can feel your pain...watching everyone else graduate and disappear 😂

Ladies, sorry, selfish post. Need a hand hold. On way to MFAU now (DH driving). No movements this morning and normally I get loads by 8am as well as woken up with kicking in the night but that also didn't happen ..........absolutely sh1tt1ng myself! Really worried about Bubsy. Something isn't right I know it!

@InDreamland here for the handhold, hoping bubsy is just having a rest this morning.

I'm so scared @Bluebelltulip just waiting now to be seen. Just done urine sample. Think there's a couple of other ladies in too in the bays.

Willing Bubsy to give me a really good kicking.

Hopefully they won't keep you waiting much longer x x

Hope everything is ok @InDreamland. I bet little one has just settled in a cozy spot to sleep but you’re doing the right thing getting checked out.

Hope everything is ok @InDreamland. Bubsy has probably just moved into a position you can't feel as well.

@Bluebelltulip @Mistymeow @Beaglemum93 thank you so much. Just left hospital, Bubsy is absolutely fine which is such a relief. Sorry for my panic post.

Yay @InDreamland that's fantastic, do not apologise it's what we are here for and you did the right thing being checked x

I'm so glad @InDreamland! Don't be sorry, I was in for reduced movements loads of times and it's terrifying. Better safe than sorry.

@InDreamland the exact same thing happened to me yesterday. Really glad you and Bubsy are ok! RFM is so worrying, really hope that's the last episode.

@Twitwooo and @Bluebelltulip it's draining, isn't it! Sounds like you are both near the end now though, so that's something! My MMC last year was also during the PhD - it didn't derail my studies in the end, but that was through sheer willpower more than anything else. Are you both planning to take time off when baby arrives? I am hoping to take a few months off informally between March and summer break, that way I only miss one term, but can still catch up on the work over summer. Not sure if this is realistic with a newborn though!

Congratulations @Laney79 what a beautiful little chap! :)

I have been v poorly last couple of days but on the mend again. I've had an awful cold virus since Christmas Eve and a couple of nights ago my ear drum burst. The pain was comparable to when my DD was born. It was very traumatic. My husband and DD are still really suffering with their colds too and husband is getting really down about it all and struggling to cope.

We came to my parents house today and mum has made us a lovely chicken and leek soup and Dad has gone off to her first ever panto with my parents while we stay home and rest ( I am gutted to miss the panto but think I need to avoid loud noises for a while).

Hope you're all doing well, I will go back and read more of the thread now xxx

@Bluebelltulip @@Beaglemum93 @sadtoday21 thank you. I had to try so hard not to cry on the way there this morning. It's so frightening. @sadtoday21 glad everything yesterday was okay for you too. It's such a relief isn't it when the midwife is happy with the monitoring.

@ChikiTIKI sorry you've been unwell. Definitely a good idea to stay away from loud noises and give your ear a rest as that sounds really painful.

@Rubyroost how are you today? Hope the anxiety has subsided.

@RedRobin7 I'm no expert but I think they look like good results. Did the letter state low risk? I think with the asprin it's baby asprin, think I remember a midwife or consultant telling me it's half a regular asprin but I would suggest phoning your midwife for advice.

@frillyfarmer I'd say to call midwife even if just for reassurance otherwise it'll keep playing on your mind. I had that for a couple of weeks but was told as long as it's not needing me to wear a pad and it fills it and it's clear and odourless it should be okay as we can get increased discharge.

So many smart PhD students on here. Makes me feel so average lol. I only have my BA and a professional qualification. My mum has a doctorate and loves her Dr. Title lol. Think she uses more than Mrs. which upsets my dad ......he says "isn't being Mrs. good enough" lol. I wish I had the inclination to do further study but TTC and the mc's since getting married kinda took over my life. DH got his Masters last year (distinction but he's a smarty pants). My sis has a Masters. Starting to feel like an under achiever but I made a decision not to do a Masters because I have my professional qualification and being Chartered has been the important thing along with other things in life taking over. Hope you all get your PhDs with as little stress as possible! What an achievement that'll be! Means also your babies will be super smart (good brain genes).

@UnicornsandRainbows1 @InDreamland @Bluebelltulip Thank you for the advice. I've been to pick up some aspirin from Boots. The lady behind the pharmacy said I've got the right one. It says 75mg but on the back it says not to take during pregnancy, especially not in the last 3 months... I've been told to take until birth. So confused. I think I'll phone the midwife on Monday just to be sure.

@RedRobin7 I'm currently on 2x75mg aspirin a day and am for the foreseeable! I'm 21+6 at the moment. My doctor recommended taking with my evening meal and not last thing at night so as to lesson chance of indigestion/heartburn. I'm expecting to be told to come off it at some point but I'm not seeing consultant again till 27 weeks so am taking till at least then.

@redrobin I am on 75mg aspirin daily until I go into labour. I have been on it since 5 weeks. I think specific doctor advice that is tailored to you overules any general advice on the box xx

Sorry to hear some of you have had scares but glad all is ok @indreamland @sadtoday

@laney79 congratulations what a beaut x

@sadtoday21 and @Twitwoo I took a year maternity with DD1 then went back part time, DD2 was born in my write up year and I handed in just over a month ago. Mine was engineering based and involved lab work etc so I couldn't do it with a baby and I used nursery when I went back. I'm planning on a year at home with DS as I found it was about right with DD and then I'll hopefully get a job (don't know what I want to do yet though).

@InDreamland a BA is great though and so is chartership, my DH went down the chartership route and is in a much better career position than me.

@RedRobin7 and @KayJay2018 I was told by my consultant to take it up until the end which I did but obviously check what your doctor wants you to do.

@ChikTIKI I hope you get better soon.

Meeting up with some close friends and their toddlers tomorrow for the first time since DS and really looking forward to it.

@RedRobin7 I'm also on 75 mg aspirin once a day due to risks for preeclampsia. I have the dispersible kind from the pharmacy and the midwife said to take it until birth (I asked about stopping it before labour due to bleeding and she said its such a low dose that the advice is to keep taking it).

@fnej01 thanks, its tough to know what to do about movement sometimes, especially with anterior placenta! How are you feeling these days? How many weeks are you now? I seem to remember that we are fairly close in due dates!

@InDreamland I don't know about you, but sometimes I feel like the anxiety really never does end! I have to have some form of monitoring every two weeks still, whether its seeing the midwife or a scan or something. Just so terrified that I've come so far and have to stay vigilant to check on baby. I never used to be an anxious person at all, I swear! Today I carried some heavy groceries and then was kicking myself for doing that and panicked I put baby at risk. Resting now and felt a few kicks, but definitely still feel quite worried now and then. As for the higher degree, you can definitely still do it if its something you want! Its not necessary for a lot of fields, not even necessary for me, but it was a personal goal. Now I just have to find a way to get through it with baby brain - which is definitely a real thing!

@Bluebelltulip enjoy your playdate tomorrow! Thanks for sharing your experience, its helpful to hear that as I don't have any pregnant friends or colleagues here. Do you think its unrealistic to try to write-up the last 2-3 chapters of my dissertation with a newborn? I have no idea what it's going to be like (FTM). I envision writing at home while baby is sleeping, but I might be insane for thinking that will work! At least I don't need to get out of pjs from now until then, which is a minor miracle given the third trimester fatigue/heartburn, general hugeness.