Pregnancy after miscarriage - Various ways of getting from one day to the next...

[Uki]

Thanks for the thread name Purplelostprincess

Ellie - i think the hormones settle down a bit after the 3 mth mark, i was really irritable for the first couple of mths but not its settled into slight irritableness.

just had my best mate, her boyfriend and my sister round for lunch. they cooked but i just could not be arsed, they were a bit the worse for wear which normally would be great (as i would be joining them and find them equally funny) but being the only sober person with a load of tipsy ones is not a lot of fun!! ended up wishing they would hurry up and go, though they knew i was knackered so took it as being the reason for my quietness. God i feel so old and boring, aghhh

Tell me about it spugs! My mates decided to go for a few drinks this weekend, and I couldn't imagine anything less fun than sitting there feeling tired and fat while they were getting more tipsy! Have made an arrangement to meet them for brekkie tomorrow instead as am up for eating anytime. I miss being able to drink! (Oh god that makes me sound terrible doesn't it? )

doesnt make you sound bad at all hun, im the same. generally i dont miss it at all but now and again i really fancy one. i did have have the worlds smallest spritzer but then i always feel a tiny bit guilty!

Hi all! So much to read but so much of it is good news which is so reassuring. Congratulations to MOM and Ellie on the scans! So happy for you.

Torres - hope the holiday works out well. Sounds like the best place you could be for an important anniversary. And just keep going back for scans! Don't know if you're using Homerton but (as I keep boring banging on about!) they've been so amazing to me especially with the last two scans which were completely unnecessary medically and arranged at the last minute because I was freaking out. I'm actually sorry I won't be going back there as for my 12 week scan (on Tues! ) I 'graduate' to the proper antenatal dept down the corridor! Feels like a big step in itself having spent so much of this year in EPAU.

Ellie - I really relate to your emotional state befor the scan and wish I'd been around to post at the time. Hope you're feeling better now. Sometimes a row helps so hope its gone that way! I honestly think being a stepmum - espeically a custodial one if that's what you are - is THE hardest thing in the entire world ever and I'd happily argue my case with former POWs, hostages, wartime presidents... My former SDs have grown up now and I love them to bits but my God I'm glad that's over.

I've also been a basket case this week with the scan coming up, so much so that I ordered a doppler to try and find the heartbeat in advance. Having bought one that clearly said 'from 10 weeks' in the advert when I got it the instructions actually said 'from 12 weeks but you may hear it at 10'. Gutted! However, we found it after ages trying the first time then not again for three days. I was convinced the ultrasound had somehow killed the baby (DH managed to find a website saying you should only use it 3 times a week which did nothing for guilt/anxiety levels) so was monumentally relieved to find a clear, definite heartbeat this afternoon If anyone else has one, the trick is to be absolutely busting for the loo and press quite hard (ouch!).

Still feeling a bit sick but nothing like before and can't WAIT till next week to start telling people (hope that hasn't jinxed it....)

So sorry to everyone whose messages were further down and I didn't get to. This was supposed to be a quick post ;)

[please, please don't let anyone have miscarried and cross posted with me... must check back... must check back...]

Hi all! So much to read but so much of it is good news which is so reassuring. Congratulations to MOM and Ellie on the scans! So happy for you.

Torres - hope the holiday works out well. Sounds like the best place you could be for an important anniversary. And just keep going back for scans! Don't know if you're using Homerton but (as I keep boring banging on about!) they've been so amazing to me especially with the last two scans which were completely unnecessary medically and arranged at the last minute because I was freaking out. I'm actually sorry I won't be going back there as for my 12 week scan (on Tues! ) I 'graduate' to the proper antenatal dept down the corridor! Feels like a big step in itself having spent so much of this year in EPAU.

Ellie - I really relate to your emotional state befor the scan and wish I'd been around to post at the time. Hope you're feeling better now. Sometimes a row helps so hope its gone that way! I honestly think being a stepmum - espeically a custodial one if that's what you are - is THE hardest thing in the entire world ever and I'd happily argue my case with former POWs, hostages, wartime presidents... My former SDs have grown up now and I love them to bits but my God I'm glad that's over.

I've also been a basket case this week with the scan coming up, so much so that I ordered a doppler to try and find the heartbeat in advance. Having bought one that clearly said 'from 10 weeks' in the advert when I got it the instructions actually said 'from 12 weeks but you may hear it at 10'. Gutted! However, we found it after ages trying the first time then not again for three days. I was convinced the ultrasound had somehow killed the baby (DH managed to find a website saying you should only use it 3 times a week which did nothing for guilt/anxiety levels) so was monumentally relieved to find a clear, definite heartbeat this afternoon If anyone else has one, the trick is to be absolutely busting for the loo and press quite hard (ouch!).

Still feeling a bit sick but nothing like before and can't WAIT till next week to start telling people (hope that hasn't jinxed it....)

So sorry to everyone whose messages were further down and I didn't get to. This was supposed to be a quick post ;)

[please, please don't let anyone have miscarried and cross posted with me... must check back... must check back...]

sorry guys, computer went barmy flicking through all my open windows and obviously decided to send that twice. Apologies if it happens again!

Hi all! Hope everyone is healthy and well and having a nice weekend so far.
Fettle, glad your enzymes are not up too much, hopefully your bile acids are behaving too. Only a couple more days to go now and you will meet your baby!
Ellie, sometimes it does us good to clear the air, glad that you and DH have come to some good agreements! I too have been quite moody on and off this pg, thankfully feeling a bit more laid back this week as last week even I didn't like myself! Great about your referal too, when will you be seeing this health nurse?
Spugs, its hard being the only sober one but at least you have good reason! In a way am hoping my LO arrives before Christmas so I can have a nice drinky along with everyone else! Mind you, DH can't drink either just in case and if baby is late he is stuffed for New Year too!
Siameez, you did very well to pick up a HB yourself before 12 weeks! My baby's was picked up easily at 14 weeks by a MW but at 16 weeks she really struggled - it all depends where baby is laying and they have a lot of room to move around in to start with!

Had to scoot off to the doctor this morning as have a really sore patch of veins on my calf (looks like a bruise normally but has got much worse during this pg). It was really aching yesterday and my calf was swollen and hot so the MW told me to get to docs sharpish in case it was a DVT. Thankfully it is just (just, ha!) varicose veins! Nice. Have been told to keep of my feet as much as poss (also MW's advice re: poss SPD) - not quite sure how am going to manage that but DH is being great and hopefully work will agree to keep me sat on a till rather than supervising or looking after the self-service tills.

GOOD LUCK FETTLE look forward to your news (real soon)

GOOD LUCK MUMPBUMP, Can't wait to hear from you too.

beckle- you rest up, like asked. got anyone to help you? friends or rels?

Siamez- i would of loved a doppler

HI to everyone else you know who you are. healthy vibes to all.

not much happening around here routine settling in, and getting back into old life and a wee bit of work. Had a nice weekend at a garden festival, I'm so inspired but not enough time to do much major gardening besides vegie patch.

it's definately a bit more work going out with 2 dc's. we got to first garden and LL poopped everywhere, had no change of clothes so put him in wrap and cardigan and then he poopped everywhere again[ blush] taking two sets of clothes anywhere for next outing.

Ellie....I'm really feeling for you hun. You sound like you are where I was exactly this time last year, except i didn't start taking meds till about 34 weeks.

Reading your post it sounds so like the conversations that dh and i were having. It will get better hun.

There was a thread on here for AND/PND which although isn't active anyomre, was good for me to read.

I'll go have a look for it now and link it if i can {{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}}

Ellie....AND support thread. There is some useful advice here

Thanks daisy will check that out, and thanks rest of you for support, sorry I keep coming on here to moan!
Glad you heard a heartbeat siameez - when is your scan booked for?

Oh and siameez - thanks for sharing about your views on step-parenting, is SO nice to know I am not alone in finding it hard work. Sometimes I feel so inadequate, is good to hear that I am not the only person to feel it's tough at times.

ellie it doesn't make you sound bad that you miss a drink! Everyone misses something when they are pg...for me its dippy egss lol!!(i don't drink anyway but am occasionally having haf a guiness and black to top up my iron but ssssshhhhhh)

siameez when is your scan?

Hope everyone has had a good weekend. I am knackered, been telling everyone our news and everyone is really happy for us. one friend cried and another hugged me so hard i nearly exploded!!
Was sick this morning which was kind of happy (you know what i mean!) but got me thinking that my occasional cup of tea in bed at night may be to blame so swapping it for hot choc tonight!!

Hey ladies, just popping in whilst the dinner?s in the oven to see what?s going on. Hope everyone is healthy and well

Fettle ? 2 more sleeps (that?s if you can sleep!) hope you are not too itchy.

Angua ? can see how varied cycles could make EDDs tricky

Bouncing ? I can empathise on the student loan repayments, finally paid off my 5 years worth of loans last year after 9 years of working!! That?s good that you don?t have to pay it when on Mat Leave but quite right really, how on earth are we going to get over the shock of receiving less than £100 in our hands a week?!

Mumpbump ? hope the itching isn?t too awful thinking of you, all the very best for a safe delivery for you and your LO

I am SO lucky, I have stiff hips and backache like Bouncing but nothing else to date

Hey Ejt sounding exciting for you ? hope those contractions start up again soon!! All the very best hon xx

Beckle glad you spoke to the MW and hope the things she recommends helps the pain My DH isn?t happy that he needs to have a dry Xmas and NY this year just in case! (I am kind of hoping that this LO is born between Xmas and NY, my b?day is 29th so I?d be happy to share it ? it?s not the best time of year to have a b?day but at least my LO will have a Mummy who knows how it feels!) Sorry to hear about the VVs at least you can start to wear support stockings without getting too hot now.

Torres that?ll be fab coming back from hols to your scan thanks for your sentiments for me x

Feedmenow, Daisy ? hello

MOM ? so glad to hear how much better you feel so exciting telling people your news too!

EllieG ? sorry about the row hon, we had some like that in the early days but I have to say, things do seem to get on a more even keel in the 2nd trimester, just relax all you can, I am sure you are doing just perfectly re the booze, whether or not we are prepared to admit it, most of us use booze as a way to relax and socialize so it is odd when after years of doing that when that goes ? I remember in the first 3-4 months coming home on a Friday night and thinking ? what on earth shall I do, I can?t have a G&T! It?s funny it does wear off, change of habit I guess!

Spugs ? it is odd when everyone else is drinking, mind you, I loved the hangovers they got because they felt similar to the way I was generally and could only do about as much as me on those days! DH has really cut back on the booze since I have been pg, not a bad thing either Since about 20 weeks, wine smells and tastes great again but only having the smallest amount every so often because like you I feel guilty.

Hey Siameez ? will be thinking of you on Tuesday glad that the Doppler is helping even if it sometimes adds to the stress!

Uki ? all that pooping did not sound fun!

Hello hope you all had a good weekend!!

Ellie - moan away - that's what we are here for, to listen to each other's moans. Hope you do find some additional support from your DH now that you have cleared the air between you.

Siameez - Fantastic news about the heartbeat, and good luck with your scan

UKI - at poopy drama, oh well you are letting us know what we are all in for. My niece who is 9mo peed on me today

Beckle - how's your leg? Hope you are managing to keep your feet up!

Spugs- I know how you feel about feeling boring around your mates, I tend to avoid drinking nights out. Still it was nice of your friends to cook for you!

Fettle - just 2 more days to go!

EJT - any more twinges?

MrsMc - Hi! Yes, the lack of student loan payments will help! Do you intend to use your keep in touch days? apparently you should get paid for them at your normal rate but will still get your smp for the week.

Hello to everyone else!

Message withdrawn

Hey ladies

Bouncing ? I might be compelled to use the staying in touch days, we have an important industry conference at the beginning of March, I can see the firm wanting me at that! I guess the money would be nice so long as I can find someone I trust to look after Beanie

Firsty ? when are you going back to work hon? (though I?m sure you don?t even want to think about it! )

Hey all

How we all doing today?

Anyone heard from Mumpy recently? Hope it doesn't mean her liver enzymes and bile acids have shot up and she's been admitted!

Enjoying my last free hour alone, before collecting DD from school after lunch! at the moment, feeling very calm about tomorrow, but I think when I leave at 730am in the morning, that's the when the butterflies will set in. Just can't believe that is is finally here. I don't know how you all feel, but once you've had a mc (I've had two before this pg), but I just don't actually believe that it will actually be ok. Horrible the way that mc spoils what should be a magical time of pregnancy.

Ellie - keep talking to us - that's what this thread is great for!

Ejt - how you doing? Hanging in there?

Rubles - hope you're totally settled now and ready for your little one to arrive imminently!

uki - thanks the reminder of newborn life!!

MOM - congrats on the sickness!!

Glimmer - how you doing? Quite quiet at the moment for you? Hope all well.

Siameez - great news on the heart beat!

Beckle - hope work are understanding - need to rest as much as poss if you do have SPD!

big waves to everyone else - so many of us now!!

anyway, good luck with all scans coming up soon and I'll let you know as soon as I can how everything went.

take care all
xxx

Afternoon all!

Ellei - hang on in there!

fettle - really looking forward to your birth annoucement tomorrow! Thinking of you - and IKWYM about the magic being spoilt - I still don't believe that this lo will be ok - and I do think I will until she's born!

MrsMc - You sound really upbeat about everything - I haven't given up drinking alcohol totally during this pg, but haven't really fancied much - have had the occasioanl glass of wine, but nothing more! Am looking forward to a glass or 2 after lo is born!

MoM - awful as it sounds, I'm glad you've finally started feeling sick ...

beckle - please take it easy - the spd is not guaranteed to get worse ... if you take it as easy as you can, it may well stay at a level you can cope with. Hope your varicose vein is something that will only last through pg - do they tend to go away on their own afterwards?

Everybody else ...hi [waves]

Well, I've been a tad quiet (on the thread) as we had a majorly busy weekend - the contractions have all died down now ... we had the birthday lunch for Rhydian yesterday - he's 5 2 days after my edd, so we wanted to make sure that he got some fuss made of him - so we had his favourite dinner of roast potatoes, yorkshire pudding, roast beef, peas, green beans and orange potatoes (it's mashed root veg - turnip, swede, parnip, carrot, sweet potato - but he loves it - but would refuse it if he knew what was in it ) - oh, and ketchup (that was just for him!! ).

We had to dinner my Ps, the PILs, my sister and her boyfriend. The main aim to to make damn sure that PILs knew that they were not invited to stay after the baby is born (they invited themselves to stay for a week after ds was born, and didn't let us get to know our baby!), so we made the following points:

• ds is our main priority after madam is born - we don't want his nose put out of joint any more than necessary.
• ds is to be the first person to visit the new baby ...
• we welcome visits - either in hospital or at home after baby is born - but keep them short, and we're not inviting anybody to stay.
• If we need help, we'll ask for it.

We decided that dh should do the talking as it was really aimed at his Ps - and it would make damn sure that she knew we had discussed this together!

I had prompted my mum (a bit) - she knows how much the PILs (specifically MIL) wind me up - so she and dad were really supportive of everything dh was saying.

Anyway, PILs listened in stony silence. MILs face looked like a slapped arse (sorry, can't think of any other description for it) ... but as my Ps were agreeing with the points dh was making, they obviously felt they couldn't say anything. However, MIL completely blanked me until they went home ... I'm obviously the bad guy in this!

Never mind - at least it's all out in the open now, and if PILs invite themselves to stay again, dh has told me that I'm allowed to tell them to f*&k off!

I have an appointment with the acupuncturist in 2 weeks to start me off if I haven't already gone on my own - I don't want to be pressured into even setting a date for an elCS!

Have a good afternoon all, I'm going to crack on with madam's quilt.

Hi everyone. I have finally caught up with everyones news and am so happy to hear about the positive scans.

Just wanted to say to ejt1764 loving your work where the PILs are concerned. Well handled! I am firm with mine as I have to be to have any control over my/DD's life.

Good luck for all the imminent births!

Thanks Ejt feel good at the mo and Beanie?s having a busy day so that helps, I just love feeling the kicks! Rhydian?s dinner sounded lovely ? yum!! I really like your style with the PIL ? I think when we get closer I?ll make sure we have the same chat (just don?t feel that DH will say those things if I?m not there!) My babyproofing your marriage book would approve! MIL sounds like a pain, last person you need around! I?m hoping my little sis will come up and feed DH and I for a few days ? she has a calming influence on me (unlike my mother!) I?m still no further forward with the cardie I am meant to be knitting!

Thanks MrsMc and Winky! - we felt we had to tackle everybody all at the same time, so that the PILs knew that the same things had been said to everybody - my PILs use the emotional blackmail card at the drop of a hat ... poor dh gets caught between what we want as a family, and the fact that his mum doesn't want to let her darling baby go ... I was so grateful that dh had said that he'd do the talking, as that way, his mum wouldn't dare say anything back to him!!

This "babyproofing your marriage book" sounds good - what else does it say?

Glad you can feel lo kicking today MrsMc ... madam is being a bit quiet today, but I've prodded her and she's kicked back, so she's obviously just having a quiet day!

Right, back to my quilt top now ... have fun with the cardi!

Uki , lovely to hear from you! Glad you had a nice weekend, I agree you need to take a lot more out for 2 DCs than 1. I had a big rucksack I kept pre-loaded with nappies, wipes, changes of clothes for both DSs, bags for soggy/messy clothes and a portable potty and liners. Thank heavens I will only need baby stuff this time as DSs are older! Have got some friends who said they will help if they can and I may start relying on my car a bit more for now, I have to say I spent most of the weekend sat down with my feet up and my pelvis and hips ached much less this morning.

MOM, glad to hear you sounding so chirpy and that everyone is so pleased for you!

MrsMc hows things? Is lovely when baby has a 'busy' day, I love feeling all the movement - it makes everything else worthwhile! I?m sure our DHs won?t really mind a dry Christmas! Mine is not a great drinker anyway (big bloke but can?t drink much at all!). I really want to be at home for Christmas morning with the DSs so if baby decides to come early I would ideally like it to be by about 10 days. Not too fussed if I go over (highly likely I think) although don?t want to go too far over as DS1 starts school full time at the beginning of January and it would be nice if baby was here first, would hate to miss taking him in on his first day! Got a nice leaflet this morning from MW but info seems all common sense. It says reduce or stop any non-essential activities and try not to stand up too much . Got to go and see docs on Wednesday about support stockings (Boots would not sell them to me?) so will ask them for more info too.

Bouncing - doing my best to keep the leg up thanks! Hows things with you?

Firsty, glad things all okay in your household and LO growing well, its such a lovely time when they are newborn but goes by too fast? Managed to rest most of weekend and definitely feel better for it but during the week I don?t think there is much hope of it!
Fettle, one more sleep to go! Is very strange to think you?ve had your last hour alone ? I hadn?t thought of that! Hope everything goes nice and smoothly tomorrow for you and looking forward to hearing from you when you are up to it! I feel the same as you about baby being okay, I am still worried now and will be until I hold him/her ? I think that is why I am still putting off getting stuff for baby, worried about jinxing it. Have just phoned work to let them know about SPD and waiting for my manager to phone me back. I think it will just be a case of letting me sit on a till all night instead of getting off to do other things so hopefully they will be fine. Went and bought myself some very flat shoes today just in case they do want me to stand at all (am just under 5?4? so wear heels usually!).

Ejt, good for you with your PILs! I can?t believe they stayed for a week after your DS was born! Those are some good ground rules too, I would like my DSs to be the first to see new LO too although am hoping to go home as soon as poss afterwards so hopefully hospital visits will not be an option. Hope your contractions start up again soon and your acupuncture will be unnecessary! Am hoping SPD does not get worse, don?t seem to have it as bad as my friend did last year but as she has said, I have another 3 months to go! I don?t think the vein will ever totally go, I knocked my calf while pg with DS2 and it turned into a patch of thread veins and now the varicose one has appeared in the centre of that patch! MW says the pressure should come off it after pg so it should stop aching but will still have the lovely purple patch of veins! Also seems I may have some VVs in my bits too , it could just be pressure from above but would explain the lumpy bits. All good fun!
Hi to everyone else! Hope everyone is okay!

hello

looks as if Uki has her baby and Fettle nearly there! any other happy events I have missed?

thinking of all the ladies on this thread, and wishing you all good luck

time4tea (plus sweet-tea baby Torin the little guy built with MN-love)
www.flickr.com/photos/14941975@N00/sets/72157594160450037/

good luck for tomorrow fettle!