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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Pregnancy after miscarriage - Various ways of getting from one day to the next...

1000 replies

Uki · 14/08/2007 13:15

Thanks for the thread name Purplelostprincess

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
pinkrangerstartstowaddle · 28/08/2007 09:27

my little man

gingercat12 · 28/08/2007 10:33

Just to let you know that I have been reading you for quite a while, and you have been a great help to me.
Lost my baby at 11 weeks last July, but I am 12 weeks + 4 days now
All the best to you all

Mumpbump · 28/08/2007 10:51

Just checking in quickly and posting so I can find the thread easily again!

Congratulations pinkranger!!! I am going for a home birth at the moment, so good to hear of a positive experience!

Congratulations also and welcome to ginger and Sonya and anyone else who has joined the thread over the long weekend! Haven't had a chance to read back through it yet as I have lots of work to sort out, but will be back later.

EllieG · 28/08/2007 12:18

COngratulations pickranger! But ouch ouch ouch over the thought of tearing - makes me want to close my legs and hope baby stays up there.

karma · 28/08/2007 12:25

Hi all,
Just updating everyone. Had scan today. Not good news. Should be 10 weeks, but no heartbeat and measuring only 5-6 weeks. Re-scan in 1 week but expecting the worse. Feel so miserable, can't believe this will be third mc in a row. Really hoped that it wouldn't go wrong again. Anyone had any experience of this? Any success stories with similar scenario? I know I'm clutching at straws. Would love a third child but don't know whether I have the strength to go through all this again. Can't stop crying.

Mumpbump · 28/08/2007 12:35

Right - back now and managed to read through most of the posts, not that I'll remember half of them, I'm sure!!

MrsMcJnr - pleased to hear that there is no additional risk to your lo. That must be a relief for you!

Rubles - snap! We left ds with a babysitter on Saturday afternoon and went to see The Bourne Ultimatum - fab film!! I think the last time we went to the cinema was just before ds was born so over 18 months ago and we saw Underworld Evolution, I think...

Uki - glad to hear that you are getting some sleep! That's fantastic for such a little lo! I'm sure there'll be a few more of us moving on to the other thread soon - only 5 weeks to go and I do have a strong feeling that bubba might come early...

MOM - good news on your m/w appointment. I had the same m/w all the way through last time, but she wasn't around at the birth. She's unfortunately retired now so I am seeing a different one for my AN care. As for the birth, see below!

Bouncing - we got tiny baby stuff (up to 7lb 5oz) for ds as they had concerns about him being small. Unless there are similar concerns, I think you'd be fairly safe going for the bog standard newborn stuff - Next stuff comes up very big, btw. I would only get a pack of 3 vests and 3 sleepsuits, personally, to tide you through the hospital and send your dh out to buy more once you know how big/small bubba is. Also, you'll probably get given loads of outfits in newborn stuff anyway...

EllieG - think it's St. Thomas which has a walk-in EPU clinic, but if you're unsure of dates, I would have thought your GP might refer you for an early scan anyway...

Feedmenow - good to hear you sounding so positive. Now you just have to hold onto that feeling. We didn't get a doppler, but sometimes in early pg, I wished we had one. Once you can feel the baby moving, it gets so much easier, but difficult to keep positive all the time before then, I found.

Fettle - I hope you were suitably spoilt on your anniversary. This lo is due on our second wedding anniversary (and dh had the V&D bug last year) so not holding out much hope of celebration this year!

On my part, turns out that East Surrey hospital is massively overstretched at the moment so dh is now happier about the idea of a home birth which I'm booked in for. (We're lucky 'cos East Surrey is only 5 minutes drive from where we live so it would be easy to get there in an emergency.) Then I heard about a woman who had a home birth and was in labour for 24 hours with the m/w turning up one hour before the baby was actually delivered, so am now trying to see if I can get independent m/w. Feeling slightly stressed and nervous about the whole thing.

This week is shaping up to be a challenge. Dh is away on a business trip in Vietnam and we finally moved ds' cot back into his own room on Saturday - cue crying in the middle of the night - he managed to cry for an hour in total last night!! Plus he is going through a clingy patch anyway which is made worse by the fact that dh is not around. I think he's terrified I'm going to disappear as well. It was awful leaving him at nursery this morning. So, I am probably going to have a good few disturbed nights this week with no support... Dh rang this morning and I was virtually in tears on the phone, I was so relieved to hear from him and ds seemed a bit happier to have "spoken" to his dadda...

Anyway, enough about me. Hello to everyone else on the thread.

Mumpbump · 28/08/2007 12:40

Karma - x-posts. So, SO sorry to hear your news. My thoughts are with you... I can well understand how you must be feeling emotionally exhausted by a third m/c. Take your time to gather your strength - emotionally and physically...

If you think you might like to try again for another child, I would start pushing for a referral asap just in case as it is bound to take ages for them to sort it out. MrsMcJnr posted a beautiful poem about trying again on the ttc after m/c thread a while ago and someone posted it on Jules' thread more recently. I wouldn't necessarily suggest you read it right now, but worth tracking down for future reference. I found it very thoughtful and encouraging... But you should make whatever decision is right for you.

As I said to Jules, there is a lady on my antenatal thread who has had (I think) 5 m/c and is due shortly after me. So there is hope...

Feedmenow · 28/08/2007 12:56

Oh Karma, I'm so, so sorry for you Great big virtual hugs to you and a shoulder for you to cry on.
Is now the time for you to push for investigations? I know you are feeling heartbroken and scared but I am thinking that if, when the rescan next week, the worst is confirmed then can they not start on tests immediately? Could DNA from the lost bubba show anything up? I really don't know if this is how it works (although others will) but am so hoping that you can get some information so that you are ready when you are ready to try again.
Love and more big hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

WinkyGirl · 28/08/2007 13:40

Karma - am so sorry to hear about your scan. Sending hugs. You should definitely get a referal and get some answers. xxx

MrsMcJnr · 28/08/2007 14:25

MOM ? re MW ? that must be lovely and comforting for you to have the same one

Feedmenow ? yes 20 weeks today and Beanie rewarded me with a couple of kicks this morning and then again a few minutes ago ? doubt I?ve ever felt as happy in my life as I do at the moment Good idea on the baby clothes front I think that?s a great idea. Tesco and Mothercare seem to do good plain white starter kits, I?ll probably get a couple of new born sets washed and ready later on and buy another pack and have it ready at home in case I need it ? like you, I?ll want flavoured stuff! not long now until that 12 week scan that?s great that you have stayed so positive and calm, try not to worry, it?s not long until you get more reassurance that was nice of MW, I first heard the HB at 16 weeks but my appointment before that was only 12 weeks and that?s too early. I thought about a Doppler but decided it would freak me out if I didn?t hear things and I thought that it might upset the baby given how they scoot away from the MW?s Doppler! Wish my DH got the bed ready it?s always me in first these days!

Hello EllieG you could try eBay for a Doppler

Fab news for PinkRanger (thanks for posting that too Daisy!) Many congratulations and I am so delighted it all went so well, I am tingling for you! I like the name Tate post pics when you can sorry about the stitches though ? ouch!! xxx

Hey Bouncing

Gingercat12 congratulations! That is lovely news! All the very best for this pregnancy and don?t be a stranger!

Hello Mumpbump massive relief thanks DHand I are going to see the Bourne Ultimatum on Friday only 5 weeks, wow! so exciting! When do they start telling you what the likely weight of you LO will be? I?ve just got my date through for my 28 week growth scan, made me tingle Can understand why you are nervous about the thought of the MW not turning up until late ? I think my sis looked into private midwives for the same reason and they were about £700 but a Doula would cost less and give you the same support ? might be worth considering Poor you with DS, I guess he?ll sense all the change ahead too ? hope things get easier (and that this is DH?s last business trip before the B day!)

Karma I am so incredibly sorry the whole process just seems so unfair and random I hope a little miracle happens before next week ? they sometimes do but I know you have to prepare yourself for the worst ? I have been in your position [hugs] please don?t give up on having a third, as my Gran said to me, there is always a gap for the one you lost but the next one does help. The really important thing is that they investigate this hon so make sure you push for that before any vital information is lost. A friend of mine has a genetic condition and when she lost her baby she had to know why and when she found out it was because of a trisomy that was nothing to do with her condition and just one of those terribly sad things, it really gave her the strength to try again. We are all here for you, anytime x When you feel stronger and if you do feel like trying again, CAT me and I?ll send you the poem, it helps

Hey Winkygirl

Mumpbump · 28/08/2007 14:31

MrsMcJnr - Wtih my health authority, you don't have any growth scans unless they are worried about the baby's rate of growth - had about 3 with ds! So I will have no idea what its likely birth weight is. That said, I am tiny, so the chances are bubba will be relatively small. Ds was 7lb 1oz, so I am taking comfort from that!!

Unfortunately, dh has one more business trip on 25th September - less than a week before my EDD - to the Munich beer festival!! At least he will only be away for one night though so it's not too bad, but I'm not sure what state he'll be in the following day! All in the name of marketing/networking!!

EllieG · 28/08/2007 14:42

So sorry karma - that's heartbreaking news x

MrsMcJnr · 28/08/2007 14:48

Yeah, don't normally have growth scans here either but they have to closely monitor my placenta for clots hence the scans, guess I might end up with a good idea of size from those - thromobophila babies are normally smaller than average though - I was 6 14.

firststar · 28/08/2007 14:55

Message withdrawn

ejt1764 · 28/08/2007 14:57

karma - thinking of you ...

Glimmer · 28/08/2007 16:21

Have not been posting much but am reading regularly.

Karma I am so sorry about the scan results. That is heart breaking. Take your time, cry as much as you want and at some point you will see if you are ready to try again or not. It's too early to think about this now. Please stop by and get support from the ladies on this thread the time until the next scan will be very slow and hard.

MrsMcJnr -- have been reading about your clotting problem. Good to hear that the management would be the same and congrats to 20 weeks. This surely is a fantastic sign!

Mumpbump -- You might recall I am booked with an independent midwife and I am very, very happy with this decision. I also like the midwife very much and believe she is experienced and qualified. I realise that this has to do a lot with personal preferences, but if you wish I would recomment her. I think she covers Surrey, but am not quite sure. If you are interested, just CAt me and I give you her details.

And drumroll please
I declare PurpleLostPrincess, Rubles, Fettle, Mumpbump, and Ejt1764 -- as the current Grand Dames, since Uki has graduated and they are all very close together. And everybody should be Grand Dame for at least one month, don't you think?

Just realised that I have to run...

Oh, I just started week 29 and am officially third trimester now!

Woooozle100 · 28/08/2007 16:25

Quick hello to everyone

karma - sorry to read of your devestating news. I can completely understand feeling as though that is it, you cannot face trying anymore. I have said and thought the same thing myself. Just be kind to yrself - it is all very raw at the moment. Just deal with that for the time being. Maybe after some time, and possibly a referral for some tests to investigate reacurrent mc you may feel differently. Its just an awful lot to try and deal with at once, right now IYSWIM.

Congrats to Pinkranger. Posted on yr BA. Wincing at the 10 stitches bit though

Big hellos and waves to everyone else. I am v cack with keeping up with this thread. I'll be about a bit more after the 14th cos then I'll be on matty leave.

Oh - lidl are going to be selling them long sausage body pillows recommended for pg for 7 quid (or 7.99) from monday

Mumpbump · 28/08/2007 16:26

Hey Glimmer!! I was wondering about you this morning and thinking that we hadn't heard from you for a while. Congratulations on making the third trimester mark! It's so incredible how quickly time passes.

I am waiting to hear back from the Midwifery Practice in Dorking, but if I don't hear from them soon, I may well contact you for details as it does need sorting out sooner, rather than later. I started packing my labour bag the other day - even though I'm planning a home birth, it means everything will be in one easily located place - and that has brought home the reality of the impending date!!

Good idea to collectively bestow the title of the "grand dame"! It's going to be interesting to see the order in which all the babies arrive!!

MerlinsBeard · 28/08/2007 16:42

karma, i am so so sory to hear your news take care of yourself and osh fot a referral when you feelk ready.x

ejt1764 · 28/08/2007 18:40

glimmer - I've never been a grande dame of anything ... very excited now!

I looked back at some of my early posts on this thread today ... and found this one:

"knicker checkers anonymous

  • the organisation for women who feel an overwhelming need to check their underwear for signs of 'all not being well' ...

  • the organisation for those who have had to stop what they are doing and rush to the nearest loo because they have felt damp - only to find it is on overdose of lady lotion

Membership is free to all who need it! All you need to join is to confess your worst episode of knicker checking ...

I left my year 9 class in the (capable) hands of an LSA last week to run to the loo in the middle of a lesson, as I felt a bit of a gush ... needless to say it was the lady lotion!!

Graduation from kca can only be gained by giving birth!! "

originally posted that on 5th Feb ...

or how about this one (from 6th Feb)...

" ..... Now I'm getting paranoid because I'm not feeling quite as sh$tty as I was yesterday, and am getting worried that the pg is over and that I am going to see that black hole again on the screen when I go for my scan on Monday. Don't get me wrong - I'm still permanently nauseous, and being sick, and feeling dizzy, just not quite as badly as yesterday ...

Oh help me wise women - am feeling very paranoid today - better go and check my knickers again... "

Just thought it might make those who are early on feel a little better: we've all been at the paranoid early stage...

MrsMcJnr · 28/08/2007 19:03

Thanks Firsty

Thanks Glimmer well done, we needed a new Grand Dame wow! 29 weeks, that?s fab!

Hey Ejb ? good call on the pillow, need one of those

Ejt

spugs · 28/08/2007 19:16

Karma - big hugs hun xx

hello to everyone else and grongrats to pink

MrsMc - cant believe your 20 weeks already its flown past, are you finding out what your having?

MerlinsBeard · 28/08/2007 19:23

ROFL ejt! esp "lady Lotion"

ejt1764 · 28/08/2007 19:29

glad I've made you smile! ... can't claim credit for inventing the term lady lotion though ... the lady who wrote the "Rough Guide to Pregnancy" did that!

However, I find it a much more apt term than cervical mucus ... bleugh!

karma · 28/08/2007 20:54

Thankyou for all those kind words - just when I'd stopped crying you've all started me off again!! You've all been so supportive over the last few weeks, I've really valued it. Good luck to you all at your various stages, and maybe I'll be back on here at some point, who knows.
Thanks again. XX

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