The Graduates of TTC after pregnancy loss thread #2 "The Penguin Huddle " 🐧🐧🐧

[InDreamland]

Hello Ladies

Starting a new penguin huddle thread as the first one is getting very full. This is for those of us who've graduated from the conception boards.

Getting a BFP after pregnancy loss is not necessarily a happy time so this is a safe place to vent, worry and share news (good, hopefully, or bad).

I hope you are all here for the long-haul. But you are welcome no matter how briefly.
Others who are pregnant after loss but who weren't on the original thread are of course welcome too.

Let's start the roll call:

Me:
No living children, 3rd pregnancy, currently 8+3. Had early scan at 7 weeks that showed baby measuring right for 7w with a heartbeat. Got another early viability scan booked in for this Tuesday at 8+6. Really scared I've lost this one again.
2 previous pregnancies ended in mmc at 12+3 (baby stopped growing at 5 weeks) in July 2018 and mc (CP but hate that term) in November 2018. Before then had been TTC for 5 years so our journey has been 6 years since starting to TTC.

@KnitKitty @Yukka @rubyroot @Bluebelltulip @MyHeartisBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue @Amanda81 @boboelephant @Newbie21

Who have I missed?

@milkjetmum so glad your feeling a bit better I have been thinking about you.

@rubyroot Brilliant news on your scan - it’s quite amazing how quickly things progress I’m sure your next scan you’ll see your little bean

@theantsaremyfriends Amazing news on your scan also, and it’s so lovely you're having another boy - I'm the same as @DuvetCaterpillar and one of three sisters, and it's great.

@DuvetCaterpillar that’s amazing about your hcg results. It’s such a relief isn’t it? I was having a panic about my doubling time being too fast and found this study. Will be interesting to see if it’s correct going by this your hcg levels show your gearing up for a boy and me a girl. Time will tell I suppose! I’d love another girl

humrep.oxfordjournals.org/content/17/2/485.full
Here is the table within the article that describes HCG by DPO:
humrep.oxfordjournals.org/content/17/2/485/T2.expansion.html
And I also ran across this table in another often cited french forum (I live in France):
(hcg in m iu/ml)
DPO Low Norm High Girl Boy
14 16 80 300 +94,80 iu -94,80 iu
15 27 130 500 +154,05 iu -154,05 iu
16 44 220 800 +260,70 iu -260,70I ui
17 70 350 1300 +414,75 iu -414,75 iu
18 120 600 2000 +711 iu -711 iu
19 190 900 3500 +1066,50 iu -1066,50 iu
20 320 1500 6000 +1777,50 iu -1777,50 iu

Ah that didn’t copy over over right but it’s definitely interesting

@Ginmonkey84 Ah, that's an interesting study. Looking at their data, it's tricky to get much sense from it unless they were to also include the standard deviation or spread of the data each day on that study, (and at least for the first couple of detectable days, female foetuses correlate with lower HCG) so I don't think it's that predictive for individuals. Interesting idea though, let's see whether it bears out for us both!

@Duvetcaterpillar great news on your hcg. Going on your positive test I think you must be 4/5 days behind me?

Yes the sac is exactly where it should be, still very anxious obviously.

And even if I see a heartbeat at some point in the next few weeks I've then got to get through the harmony test abd scan which is so bloody scary given my tfmr at 13.5

Just back from my ds birthday party I am exhausted.
@Ginmonkey84 that's interesting about the hcg

Am due fir root canal appt and its just before scan. Worried about local anaesthetic. I seem to remember someone sending a comprehensive list of meds and effects during pregnancy. Any ideas?

I've found it there's a link on NHS, but doesn't have any info on local anaesthetic. The info I've read online is conflicting. Some articles say it's perfectly safe, others say best to wait after first trimester. I'm going to ask my dentist if they can start it without anaesthetic, possibly dig the crap out to prevent infection a d then give me dressing. Anyone had experience of root canal?

Not had a root canal @rubyroot but I did have some dental work done in the first trimester, the dentist assured me that the anesthetic she was using is safe but said others weren't so got the dental nurse to double check she was using the right one to be sure.

@rubyroot Yes, I think we must be very close in dates - will be here to hold your hand on the way to the next scan / 13 week stage. Your little one has landed in the right place - over the first hurdle!

No idea about dental anaesthesia I'm afraid, although you could check the Best Use of Medicines in Pregnancy website if you know which medications they're likely to suggest. Don't forget your Mat1B certificate if you have one - free NHS dentistry during pregnancy!

www.medicinesinpregnancy.org/Medicine--pregnancy/

www.nhs.uk/common-health-questions/pregnancy/are-pregnant-women-entitled-to-free-nhs-dental-treatment/

@DuvetCaterpillar it's your medical exemption certificate you need not matb1. Don't think I had to show it in my first pregnancy when I had a check up early on, they just didn't charge me as I said I was pregnant.

Ah, I just double checked the page I linked and it says both, so we're both right @bluebelltulip Has anyone started getting their paperwork like that together - should I be doing something or will it be done as part of my booking in appointment if I get that far?

@DuvetCaterpillar ah I see. Your midwife should give you your form for the maternity exemption at your booking in appointment, you can't get your matb1 until after you have had your anomaly scan.

Great - many thanks @Bluebelltulip My ectopic was found at six weeks last time, so I've never got as far as the booking in appointment before - all feels new. Fingers crossed it finds its way and sticks this time round. How are you feeling today, on the mend I hope?

@DuvetCaterpillar I'm feeling better from feeling ill in the week but emotionally tough as it's six months since my daughter died. Fingers crossed for you.

@Bluebelltip that still must be very raw and I doubt the emotion regarding your daughter will go away. Its a massive bereavement for you to go through.

Thanks for your reply. I guess with all the stuff I've read (don't Google) I probably won't trust the dentists even if they say it's safe. Just another thing to add to my worry list!

@DuvetCaterpillar you seem to be coping well, considering. Let us know how the scan goes next week. x

Hi ladies!

Thanks for adding me to the new thread @InDreamland.

I had a lovely holiday, but getting back to reality now.
I didn't have any nausea while away, but it's come back a bit today, which is weird. Baby must've liked France I think.
I've got my dating scan coming up on Thursday, and a bit nervous about it but trying my very best to remain positive. I've been doing really well on the mental-health side of things recently so trying to keep it like that. (Didn't even freak out that the morning sickness disappeared!)

So as I've not posted for a while; here's my role-call:

Age 31
TTC since Dec 2017 for no.1
MMC - stopped growing at 6 weeks, surgical management at 11 weeks. 3 more MCs at 4, 5 and 5.5 weeks; and referral to RMC. Was briefly treated for high prolactin levels (for all of 2 weeks before BFP), and am on progesterone pessaries for now.
Currently 12+2; scan will be at 13 weeks with specialist due to RMC recommendations and the fact I have a weird womb.

Just been trying to catch up with everyone's new (a lot seems to have gone on this week while I've been away!!). Congrats on all of the lovely scans and good news. Welcome to the newbies... The first 3-4 weeks are the hardest, but you'll get there!

@Yukka CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!! Well done you! I'm so proud of you! When you're up to it, please post and let us know some details about the labour/birth. Was it all natural in the end?
She is absolutely beautiful!!! (A girl! Yey!!!) And she looks so healthy and peaceful. How are you finding life with a newborn?

Our first Rainbow Baby of the thread! May there be many more!!!

Hi @Bluebelltulip I'm so sorry to hear about your daughter, and six months is still so recent, it must be excruciating. Would you like to tell us about her? What was her name?

Welcome back @KnitKitty and good luck for your dating scan on Thursday.

Thanks @rubyroot - I'm still a bit up and down, but still riding off the relief of reasonable HCG results for now. I had counselling through work after my ectopic which also helped me a lot in terms of beginning to accept what I can and can't control (very much against my control freak nature and still a struggle, but it was good to have some dedicated time to talk that through) so I'm trying to focus on that. How are you doing today?

@DuvetCaterpillar I've decided to put the root canal off until after first trimester, if I get there. I'm going to ring dentist up tomorrow. If anything happens I don't want any doubt in my mind that tmi could have prevented it, if that makes sense. I just hope the infection doesn't return before then!

I feel anxious all the time currently, pain is still there. I've started to think maybe the small luteal cyst that I have is slightly pressing on my bowel. I looked a diagram of the human body up and ovary and bowel are close together and came up with my own strange conclusion. I guess if the pain was bad something would have happened by now. It's been over a week!

I just can't even envisage it going well. My boyfriend said if we have a baby then... I cut him off and said I don't even want to think that far ahead, I just can't.

Just coping the best way I can, I gurss. Like you x

Sorry at @knitkitty glad you're on good form and welcome back. Placenta will be doing its work by now and so sickness going is normal, Im sure you know that anyhow. Whereabouts in France were you?

Good luck for your scan x

@rubyroot Absolutely, and entirely understand your reasoning - we're all just doing whatever we need to get through this. No one ever mentions in school how nerve-wracking and scary all this getting and staying pregnant stuff is! Hand hold to you, one day at a time.

@rubyroot I absolutely completely get you. I had some work on a filling under GA just before my second MC and I will forever wonder whether there was a link. The dentist and dental nurse said it was safe so I hope it was a shit coincidence.

@rubyroot - I had root canal whilst not pregnant. It's painful! Also the thought of having to keep your mouth open whilst the dentist works will must likely make you want to gag if you have nausea. If you can I would agree that you defer it to the second trimester...might be worth speaking to your GP just in case an infection goes flare up as you may need to take antibiotics.

@KnitKitty I'm 13+6 and while the nausea is mostly gone I still feel quite sick after eating which feels quite similar to the nausea I had before, I also had bad nausea on my flight home a few weeks ago after not having it for ages - I think it kind of just has its own agenda and doesn't follow the rules!

I'm on holiday in Ireland with a family member, on one of those old people bus tours 😅 It's probably at exactly the right pace for me right now as everyone is walking a bit slow and we have lots of bathroom breaks! However I'm feeling totally shattered by early afternoon - this growing a baby thing is exhausting.

@Amanda81 I'll speak to my dentist, I'm worried about flare up and don't really know what's best antibiotics or local anaesthetic in first trimester.

I guess I'll just have to cross that bridge if and when it comes to it.

Got to get through my scan first so I spose no point worrying about that yet.

@Frillyfarmer my bloating has been horrible. Swear people who don't know I'm pregnant are staring at it and I was asked on the tube (not wearing a baby on board badge) if I was having a boy or girl!!!! I mean WTF!!! MORTIFIED!

@DuvetCaterpillar I'm really worried not just about possibly mc out there but also even if I don't it's not a relax put your feet up holiday, it'll be a full on sight seeing active lots of walking about and lugging luggage around trip. I've no idea if I'll be up to it and don't want to fly all the way there then sleep for half of it. I am normally quite active on these type of holidays but if this baby actually sticks by some miracle I just don't know if I feel right going all that way. Maybe it's my anxiety at the moment. Midwife says it's fine to go because we're flying comfortably but I guess after taking a return long haul and return short haul holidays during first pregnancy which we ended up losing I'm petrified of losing this one too due to travelling or whilst travelling if we even make it into the 2nd trimester.

@milkjetmum how are you doing? So sorry you've had to go through this.

@KnitKitty welcome back from hols! Glad you're not getting so much sickness now. Very exciting your dating scan will be soon.

@rubyroot no experience of root canal but think I'd get GP/midwife advice. I can totally get being cautious.

Ladies I'm feeling so anxious again. Partly because DH is away tonight for work, only 1 night but I hate being left home alone without him especially when I'm pregnant. First pregnancy I started bleeding when he was on a lads weekend away. Also, we've had 2 scans now where I've seen a heartbeat and things measuring as they should, I am petrified now of losing this one after seeing the heartbeat, like it'll be just be a bigger blow now. I've booked in the Harmony test for next weekend and dreading that too now. I'm exhausted so think it's making me emotional. I'm really struggling with this pregnancy. All I want is a healthy baby but feel like I'm just waiting for it to be ripped away from me again. DH has been taking about taking people once we have our 12 week scan and I just don't think I'm really ready to tell people as we see them because I don't want the congratulations because I don't feel excited, all I feel is anxiety. Also worried it'll just jinx it and we'll lose baby straight after telling people. Not even his family know yet, only told my family because he wanted to and I regret it now as feel like I'm just getting lectured about what to do and what no to do, I don't need that. I really don't want FIL knowing because he only says weird and inappropriate things as does his awful girlfriend. He doesn't even know about our 2 losses because we felt they'd just say stuff to make it worse. I'm just in a general panic now.