Catching up with those from TTC thread 5!

[Tropicana1]

Took me ages to work out my post wouldn't work because the last thread was full!!

@MrsEG @MrsC87 @Fivebyfive2 @Delilah7 @EltzBee @Crossfitgirl @CobaltRose96 @BabySquid @LikeTheFruit @daisiesandpeonies

(Runs back to old thread for more names... bloody baby brain!)

@MrsEG excellent news that you've got the least complicated of all the twins - that must be so, so reassuring to hear. And it's also great news that you've got options when it comes to birth (provided the twins are on board). It sounds like your work are fairly understanding, so I bet they'd accommodate your needs at 28 weeks and let you work from home.

Speaking of which - when are you planning to go on mat leave? I'm self-employed, so I was planning on working up until the end of January - but in my industry January is a very quiet month, so I'm tempted to save a bit extra and just go off from Christmas. We'll see. I feel like I might get bored waiting around for 6 weeks with not much to do / feeling huge.

Yeah the social media announcement is a funny old chestnut. DH ended up doing it, and tagging me in it, and it is nice to have it out in the open, as it were. But maybe that's just a perverse sign of the times! My favourite was calling/messaging all our favourites. We went through our wedding guest list to make sure we'd included everyone we wanted.

Sorry I was so preoccupied with my pram I didn't reply to anyone. Thankfully I think 90% of the posts to catch up on are @Bettythecat posting the same thing 😂

@MrsEG A sloth/slug hybrid sounds fabulous! You have double the pregnancy so can be doubly lazy I say.

@Bettythecat Paris sounds great! I hardly drink even when not pregnant but think I'd struggle being in France and not being able to eat all the lovely cheese haha 🧀 That lull between the first trimester symptoms stopping and the movements starting is a strange few weeks, my midwife said try to enjoy it as it won't be long until baby is booting you in unpleasant places :) It's so hard though and I feel like with each 'milestone' we reach, we just get anxious about meeting the next one. Glad DH made it up to you, it's sweet that he's so excited but I understand you wanting to just tell people in your own time.

@Fuiseog Wow 20 weeks, congrats! I remember you from the TTC board ☺️ How funny we ended up with the same pram on the same day! The Loic is lovely! I ruled it out as I thought as well that it would be a disastrous choice with a mucky baby/toddler so interesting to hear it's not actually a nightmare to keep clean. Maybe I should have looked into it more ☺️ DH loves and chose the green though, possibly because his team plays in green, but as I've chosen pretty much everything else it was nice for him to have his say haha. I love it too! We have been wheeling it around the kitchen and I've crashed it already 🙈

@Delilah7 Ethan is scrumptious. Sorry to hear you've been struggling with his colic and reflux and hope his tummy feels better soon.

@thumper59 I'd been wondering where my due week buddy had gone! Where did you go on your holiday? Exciting your nursery is nearly there. Our clothes are all in piles as I'm putting off washing them but can't wait to get them all sorted. You look fabulous by the way, properly blossoming :)

@MrsR16 @PippaPug @cupcakesandglitter Thank you, seeing it all parked up ready has made everything feel so real!

@purplefig We decided to go with the Uppababy Vista after seeing loads of really positive reviews on mumsnet and online. The general consensus was that other than it being quite large, nobody could really find fault with it. I liked that everything was easily clicked on and off, the carrycot was breathable and sleep safe and it had a ginormous basket. It's fairly expensive although we got quite a good deal but I figured that I'd rather spend more for something that will last than buy something cheaper and then get annoyed with it and end up replacing it. It's also easy to add another seat to if/when we decide to have another. It's a minefield though, there are just hundreds of prams! I'd advise you to do your research first and narrow down a list of buggies that seem to meet your needs and be well reviewed. You might want something that goes off road easily or which folds small for your car or is easy to get on the bus with. Consider what would make life easy or difficult and try to look for prams with the features you need. Going into a pram shop and being greeted by dozens of seemingly similar prams is a bit overwhelming I think. Then have fun taking them on little test drives around the shop ☺️

@purplefig Yes super reassuring, Google can take you down some horrible black holes sometimes so it was nice to hear from the expert that actually the high likelihood is I’ll have a nice healthy pregnancy (I’ll just be like a beach ball on legs very fast!)

Mat leave, I honestly don’t know. 37 weeks takes me to 5 Feb so ideally I wanted to work about 2 weeks of Jan before I started, otherwise I’m off for Xmas break from 18 December so it’ll be a loooong wait! But I suppose I have to take in to account how huge I’ll be and also this high chance of them coming even earlier. So I honestly don’t know - another one I need to chat to work about I think! Jan at work is super quiet for me too so at least if I am feeling dire I can WFH and not really do much!

@thumper59 you look beautiful 😍 where are your lovely sandals from?
@MrsEG that all sounds really reassuring - so glad that you get on well with your twin consultant and it's all good news so far!
@Delilah7 I can't believe you have a 7 week old! It really doesn't feel that long since you were starting your TTC journey!
Thanks for all of the kind words I'm feeling a bit better about my weight now - I'm going to sign up for some aqua fit and pregnancy yoga when I'm feeling better. I'm also on day 2 off work, really needed a break especially after this morning's 4.00am vom session 😭 Any sick day viewing/reading recommendations? The more mind numbing the better 😂

@PippaPug @cupcakesandglitter Thankyou ladies! You are so lovely 🥰

@TrashKitten10 aw Thankyou, haha I am back! We went to Crete. It was lovely- back at work now though 😖. Hope you are well!! It's getting closer and closer now isn't it, it has flown so far! I hope these last few months do but I think they'll drag!

@daisiesandpeonies aw Thankyou, so kind! They're from primark! A long time ago though, however they always have ones like it in. They're super comfy xx

@TrashKitten10 ahhh that sounds perfect in that case! We'll need something suitable for off road and ideally beaches (if that's a thing?!). I just wonder how much we'll realistically use it, as I'm planning to use the sling a fair bit, provided I get with on with it. As such, I'm reluctant to spend lots of money...and some of the prams in mothercare were eye-wateringly expensive!

@MrsEG I'd never cope, but Google really should be mostly banned in pregnancy! So glad to hear you're feeling reassured. Yeah it's a funny time of the year isn't it? At least you've got the working from home option. I think I'll just leave it and see how I feel. Need to get my maternity allowance forms all sent off at some point too. All fun and games.

@daisiesandpeonies have you got Netflix? When I felt super rough I binged this Australian reality show 'Yummy Mummies' - it is absolute and utter trash, and just what I needed! No but really, I really can't stress enough just how mind numbing it is.

@cupcakesandglitter - oh that’s lovely, I bet you can’t wait! If I was at home I would of had a scan by now I’m sure of it! Been snorkelling earlier but it’s a bit nippy so just relaxing on our balcony now with a book.

@Purplefig - Thank you for the reassurance - i feel it’s such a mind game, second guessing myself and everything! And yes 🙈 I have had a slightly upset stomach for the last few weeks - assuming it’s pregnancy related and not just because I’m away 😬
RE mat leave - I’m self employed, but when I work, I tend to be in London living in the clients homes - due to this I think I will stop working at Christmas, I may do a little bit of work afterwards, but only clients who I have worked for before, no new ones at that point (I can get some quite full on temp jobs and don’t want that hassle) also because I don’t go home for 3/4/5 nights a week the further I am in pregnancy the more I’m going to assume I will want my own space!

@Fuiseog
I haven’t had any actual morning sickness, I have felt sick but not been sick which I think also hasn’t been playing on my mind. I think I will only feel more relaxed once I have had the scan and then will start to feel real. How many weeks are you? Do you know the sex of the baby?

@MrsEG - How are you feeling today? Yes I know, I’m just itching to get to Saturday now - don’t think I have ever wanted to leave a holiday early before! Fantastic news that your twin pregnancy is the least complicated of them all, really hope you can work from home from 28 weeks onwards.

@TrashKitten10 - is that the uppababy vista? I love that pram, and the Cruz!

I am @PippaPug but also super nervous, just dreading the worst!! Oooh I'm jealous!! Sounds amazing, where have you gone? X

@Fuiseog it's going great! Baby is doing well, always seems to be moving about. I think I'm beginning to feel pokes up in my diaphragm, so baby's obviously growing! 😊 how are you doing? Xx

@purplefig I need to find myself some dungarees... where did you get yours from? I'm trying to figure out when I'm going to go on mat leave. I want to work as long as possible, due to getting stat pay only, but I also don't want to be super exhausted before baby gets here! It's so tricky.

@MrsEG I can't believe you're 11 weeks already! That time is flying! Obviously not for you though haha! Doesn't seem like 2 mins ago you were telling us all that you're pregnant!

@PippaPug yeah that makes plenty of sense. Am I right in thinking you're a nanny? In which case you definitely don't want to be chasing around after pesky children in the final stretch of pregnancy . I work a much more sedentary, desk-based job so could theoretically go a bit longer but we'll see.

@MrsR16 mine are from the ASOS maternity range, but I got them from eBay. They're soooo comfy and have three different buttons to adjust for bump size. Agree with you on not being sure when to go on mat leave. Whatever the weather I think I'll arrange mat pay to kick in from Feb, then I'll either work Jan or cover it with savings.

@daisiesandpeonies Oh poor you! Queer Eye is an excellent sick-day binge watch, I also recently flew through Working Moms on Netflix, it’s very funny!

@PippaPug Feeling better today, just tired really! Yes, I’m going to ask to WFH from 28 weeks, maybe even a bit earlier - they’re super accommodating at work though so I’m sure it’ll be fine. Also, I haven’t actually been sick once, only felt queasy - and I have double hormones! So that’s totally normal. Hope you have a safe trip back!

@MrsR16 I know, where has the time gone! The idea now that I may go on mat leave at Xmas too, it’s suddenly all happening very fast! How are you feeling? So fab you’re feeling so many movements!

@purplefig I need to source some dungarees I think! I actually picked up a pair of Séraphine maternity leggings today; holy mother they are so sooo comfortable. Very opaque as well; think I’ve found my new favourite pants!!

@daisiesandpeonies oh @MrsEG mentioning Working Mums has just reminded me: have you seen The Letdown? It's so, so good - it's a comedy series about first time motherhood, but also kind of hard hitting at times. Also if you want something hilarious that has plenty of seasons - I cannot recommend Brooklyn 99 enough (I found I had to watch a couple of eps to 'get' it, but I'm a die-hard fan now).

@MrsEG ooo I've heard good things about Séraphine. Just had a quick look at the leggings but they're all black - and I can't do black with the amount and colour of pet hair I have to deal with at home . Have to say, I am fully committed to dungaree life now. Have worn them all week long .

@daisiesandpeonies I know it's mad isn't it. He's 7 weeks Saturday and I'm just sad about it 😂😂😂 xx

@PippaPug my symptoms disappeared overnight at around 11 weeks, I realised one morning that I actually felt totally normal again, they never came back. It's normal for symptoms to come and go so try not to worry

@MrsEG that's great that you liked your consultant, particularly considering how often you'll need to see someone compared to us singleton pregnancies!

@purplefig we didn't do a proper social media 'announcement', we just waited til around 23 weeks then I shared a holiday photo of me and DH where I'm clearly pregnant and people figured it out from that.

I start my maternity leave at 39+4. I didn't want to waste my leave before the baby arrives and I'm still feeling great (33+2 now) so I didn't see any reason to start earlier

@TrashKitten10 I'm getting some pretty painful movements now, not all the time luckily but at least a couple of times per day, the other weekend we were out for a walk and baby kept kicking me in a particularly painful place, enough to stop me in my tracks and make me catch my breath. Luckily the walking rocked him to sleep after 10 minutes or so of that!

Hi all, just catching up, sorry if I miss anyone...

@bettythecat, so glad to see you had a lovely time in Paris! I'd be the same about needing to eat... Even without being pregnant! We started buying little bits that caught our eye at around the 14 weeks mark so I'd say go for it if you see something 😀

@MrsEG, so glad your appointment went well and all looks OK. Xx

@purplefig, just a note on the, ahem, bathroom issues... I've been really up and down on that front from the get go! Started fine, then was constipated, then fine again, around the 13 weeks mark I had the runs on and off for about 2 weeks. Then fine again. Now I seem to to a bit constipated again ☹️ Trying to find a happy medium is the aim of the game!

So, now I've bored you all with tmi about the toilet, how are we doing?! We've made it past hump day at least 🙂

On the maternity leave question, I'm due 9th Jan and hope to work up until when we break for Christmas, then start my leave from early Jan. Might be a tad ambitious, but it's an office job within walking distance so fingers crossed I won't have to finish too much earlier. I'm in accounts and pointed out to my boss today 'only 4 more month ends to process before I go'... She went a bit pale 😂

Thanks for the TV recommendations! It's been an entertaining day 😂
That said I was just wondering if anyone else experiences/ed sharp pain around their bellybutton and down one side when they were laying down and went to move? It's quite sore today and suddenly got very bad. I don't know if I should call up the midwife or not. I've already been scanned for ectopic.

@purplefig I always forget about eBay! I will have a look 😊

@MrsEG yeah I'm doing well thank you! Keeping busy with things but enjoying the movements when they happen!

@Fivebyfive2 I honestly can't wait to finish work... things have changed for some reason since I got pregnant and at the moment I've never felt so undervalued at work. That sounds like a good plan! 😊

@daisiesandpeonies if you're concerned, call the midwife! They will never tell you off for calling with a concern - I seemed to be calling mine every other day in the first trimester!

@purplefig Loved The Letdown! Yeah, I should really avoid black leggings with the dog but for these levels of comfort I’ll deal with it!! I think most people I know now understand I am at any given time at least 10% dog hair!

@stormtrooperjulian I know, it sounds like I’ll be there a lot! I quite like that I get so many extra scans though, will keep my anxious mind happy!
I think that sounds great re: your maternity leave, id love to leave it as late as I can but I guess you just need to see how you feel at that stage! My sister went off a month early as her back and hip pain got too much, but if you’re still feeling great sounds like you’ll be one of the lucky ones!!

@Fivebyfive2 Thank you lovely! I don’t work in Finance but work closely with them in raising invoices each month, and I won’t pretend I haven’t counted down how many month-ends I have left already haha!

@daisiesandpeonies Give your midwife a call if it’s is painful, I’m sure she won’t mind at all. I hope it’s just growing pains for you X

Watching old Bake Off re-runs tonight (my absolute fave show) and it’s bread week - won’t pretend I haven’t text DH asking him to grab a nice loaf on his way home!!! I’m drooling at the screen!

Morning all!

Can I ask a moral dilemma question that I think I should probably know the answer to but clearly I’m very confused at the moment??!

I saw my best friend yesterday; we’ve been friends for 23 years and she was my maid of honour in March.
She’s just got engaged and is getting married in Mexico next May.
She wants me to be her maid of honour, but clearly totally understands that the baby will only be 2 months old then, so wouldn’t be surprised if we said no.
Your options are, don’t go, or leave DC with parents for a week (possibly shorter) to do your duties?
I honestly can’t imagine missing her wedding but I also can’t imagine leaving the baby for up to a week.
What would you do?

I know I’m probably a bad person for even asking (or that’s how I feel) but I also know I’m my own worst critic.

Honest answers much appreciated and I won’t be offended!

@ELW85 So, I can only really answer based on my sisters experience but for her, this would have been impossible - at that age her DD was cluster feeding and as she was breastfeeding she couldn’t possibly have been away from her. They are still soo teeny at that age too. Of course, if you choose to bottle feed absolutely the grandparents could take the feeding on - but it’s pretty full on! I’m not in any way trying to be negative but I remember for the whole family it was kinda all hands on deck around that time for sis, I often had to go and just walk the dog for them as she had been feeding round the clock and had barely gotten out of bed. But this was due to her breastfeeding so baby was entirely reliant on her (at 2 months she was still refusing a bottle even with expressed milk). In all honesty it’s a very tough decision as there’s a very real chance you just won’t know until baby is here - is 2 months calculated from your due date too? As you may need to factor in going overdue?

In perspective, we have been invited to some good friends wedding just in Wales, when our babies will be 6 weeks old, and have turned it down (they don’t know why yet but we’ll reveal next week!) - I just don’t want to put that level of pressure on myself. If I have had a section too I’ll barely be up and walking by that time (another thing to think about). It really is totally, completely up to you though, but it is a tough one! You’re not a bad person for asking at all just make sure you’re putting yourself first here!

@ELW85 - I wouldn’t be leaving my 8 week old baby (could be younger) for a week - do you want to BF too?

Normally a babe in arms can go - would your husband be going? Could he look after the baby during the day?

If he isn’t going and it’s just you - then no I wouldn’t be going, you wouldn’t know what kind of birth you will have (C section etc) so you could still be in pain, you could potentially still be bleeding, your hormones will be everywhere so if your position I would be saying No

Hope that helps!

Thank you, @MrsEG - I hadn’t even thought about what it would be like if I needed a section or if the baby was late.
I’m still leaning more towards not going, as much as it’ll be really really hard, it’s still the right thing for us, I think.
Thanks again for the response and not judging me! Xx

@PippaPug - yes, DH would be going. I genuinely don’t think I can go, and feel awful for trying to find a way.

@ELW85 - I would think about it for a few weeks or till you next see her and say that your honoured she wants you to be her MOH but due to the uncertainty of when and how baby will be born, and the fact you want to BF (If you do) then it’s easier to say no now, you may not even be fit to fly, my friend had a C Section and it could infected and she needed to go to hospital every 48 hours to get it rebandaged and that was for 6 weeks or so, I’m not saying that to scare you (or any woman who is has or having a C section) but in her case she wouldn’t of been able to fly.

Even if you feel fine and went - you may really struggle as your miss your baby so much, personally I couldn’t do that.

If you were going to pay for flights and accommodation - could you use that to buy your best friend a amazing gift or something?

@ELW85, this might be really daft question, but could you and dh go, with the baby? I'd say at that age it's probably the only option apart from not going. Don't feel bad for trying to find a way to be there for your best friend, it is natural to want to go. But it's good she's being understanding about why you might not be able to. Xxx