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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

The Graduates of TTC after pregnancy loss thread

994 replies

KnitKitty · 09/06/2019 18:35

Hello,

Starting a new penguin huddle for those of us who've graduated from the conception boards.

As I said in the old TTC thread, getting a BFP after pregnancy loss is not necessarily a happy time so this is a safe place to vent, worry and share news (good, hopefully, or bad).

I hope you are all here for the long-haul. But you are welcome no matter how briefly.
Others who are pregnant after loss but who weren't on the original thread are of course welcome too.

My stats:
TTC since Dec 2017
Age: 31
TTC no.1
1 MMC and 3 early losses between 4-5 weeks (or, CPs, but I hate that term) all happened last year within the space of 10 months.
Currently 6+1 with 5th pregnancy

@InDreamland @moonpeace @Bluebelltulip @hayleyfx @Laney79 Please add others I may have forgotten!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
25
tinatsarina · 16/06/2019 09:40

@KnitKitty I'm only 2+4 but it seems like my abdomen where my uterus would be seems harder when I touch it. My partner reckons it's because I've had a baby before and the MC so its more noticible now.

I hope I don't show early. I want to keep it secret from work for a while then again I feel like I want to tell everyone asap incase it goes wrong and I can have more support.
Anyone feel like they need to go to the toilet more and I don't mean a pee (although I think that's increased to)

InDreamland · 16/06/2019 17:53

@Zznorth or odds sooo hard isn't it and feels like ages to go if this one does stick but at same time just waiting to mc again. DH has had very very poor sperm results which means we're very likely to mc again. It's bad, that's why I'm not believing this will be a full term healthy pregnancy. Fx your one sticks. When are you registering with your midwife?

@KnitKitty thank you. I really need this promotion to distract me although TBH I don't think anything will distract me from thinking about this. I feel so un-pregnant. Physically I feel nothing apart from very occasional light headed feeling or tiredness but then everyone is tired so think it's this rubbish weather. I am wishing now I'd not tested so early, I mean I've known for over a week now and it's just dragging loads. 3 or 4 weeks is a very very long time when pregnant. Like you say fx more BFPs join us very soon. How are you feeling today? I remember from my first pregnancy I could feel a hard lump in my lower abdomen that made it impossible to sleep on my front because it was so uncomfortable from around 7-8 weeks, I also had excruciatingly painful boobs which made turning over in bed really uncomfortable too from 6 weeks.

Amanda81 · 16/06/2019 18:08

Hey @KnitKitty - my lower abdomen started to feel thicker around 8-9 weeks. My trousers started to get uncomfortable around 10 and I am now starting to feel podgy at just over 12 wks. I've never had that bloated feeling. Sorry to hear you are struggling with your cold, I hope it passes soon.

Fingers and toes crossed that this is a sticky one @InDreamland

InDreamland · 16/06/2019 18:12

Thank you @Amanda81. Having little to no pregnancy symptoms though is not a good sign. Wish mc wasn't a thing. Why does it have to happen?

InDreamland · 16/06/2019 18:50

I had a peek at the due February thread. Everyone's so excited on there. So different to the anxiety on here. Every second feels like a lifetime and constantly feel like I'm about to start bleeding. I'm going crazy. I'm 19 or 20 DPO now. I just want to know what will happen and when.

Amanda81 · 16/06/2019 18:55

Although difficult @InDreamland try to hold on to some hope. This pregnancy directly follows my 2nd MC which was at 5+5 wks and I also had no symptoms until 7 weeks. Constantly felt that it was all going to end (and tbh still do on a regular basis). It's weird that symptoms can give us so much hope, whereas in reality they can't really indicate what's going on. With my first pregnancy I had all the symptoms from 6 weeks and lost that one at 10wks. I know you are probably taking one day at a time, but are you thinking about having an early scan? Sending hugs x

InDreamland · 16/06/2019 19:03

@Amanda81 I might go for one but not sure if that will reassure me. Also petrified now of scans after the two we had in EPU were so heartbreaking. If I get to 7/8 weeks I'll register with midwife and tell them about my anxiety with my history. Got acupuncture on Saturday so hopefully that will help.

tinatsarina · 16/06/2019 19:31

Soni thought I was 2+3 but I stupidly entered my LMP from the last day not the first so I'm actually 3+4 lol

InDreamland · 16/06/2019 20:00

@tinatsarina when are you going to register with the midwife? Are you going for an early scan?

tinatsarina · 16/06/2019 21:20

@InDreamland I'm not sure my last one ended as a CP at 3+6 so I want to maybe get to 5 weeks but I feel like if I tell people, even the doctor it's going to jinx it

tinatsarina · 16/06/2019 21:23

Sorry @InDreamland posted to soon. I don't think I'll go for an early scan as my MC in Feb was around 9/10 weeks baby had only got to 8 weeks so I feel if I had have got an early scan it would have shown a heartbeat but then a week later something changed and it all would have happened anyway

InDreamland · 16/06/2019 23:30

@tinatsarina that's exactly what my thoughts are. Petrified of jinxing it. What's the point if I se a heartbeat then lose it? My head is in a spin.

MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue · 17/06/2019 06:48

Totally get all the talk of jinxing! I have decided not to buy any clothes yet, want to wait until second trimester... if I get that far. Whoever suggested the hairband trick - you have changed my life today! Brilliant!

@InDreamland I have checked out the January board this weekend, but they are all talking about whether they have names picked! I am SO NOT there yet. I can't even buy a pair of jeans that fits let alone start planning a name!

tinatsarina · 17/06/2019 08:23

I'm just trying to get past tomorrow. My cp was at 3+6 and that's tomorrow. I'm constantly wearing pads as well incase it starts.

InDreamland · 17/06/2019 08:24

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue I also held off on buying maternity clothes in my first pregnancy because I didn't want to jinx it even though my clothes, especially jeans got really tight. Ended up living in leggings as way more comfy and more stretch. Definitely will end up same with this one and wait until 16 weeks if I ever make it that far. It is forever away though.
Wow names so early? I admit DH and I started talking about names with first pregnancy at around 9 weeks but how naive we were.

Strange, I thought I am 4+5 today based on LMP but NHS calculator says am 5 weeks today .........but did say I have 26 day cycle as it has shortened since mc#2. Ov'd 3 weeks ago today or tomorrow. Got my positive OPK very late Sunday night on the 26th May, almost in early hours of the Monday morning. I know it's only a few days in it but psychologically moving into the next week ...........

Does everyone feel every minute like they're starting to bleed? Or worried when you have plans and arrangements it'll happen at the most inconvenient time? I'm out tonight at a concert and petrified it will ruin my night out.

InDreamland · 17/06/2019 08:26

@tinatsarina I was the same, wore pads for 5 days from when AF is due and only last couple of days have switched to liners instead but have been tempted still to pop a pad on. I probably will pop one on before the concert tonight.

UnicornsandRainbows1 · 17/06/2019 08:30

@InDreamland Precisely why I won't join the Feb board. It must wonderful to be all excited and blissful, but I just can't do it. I know too much of the other side to get too comfortable. Plus I joined the Jan board and then had to leave it which sucked.

Kintan · 17/06/2019 08:45

Gosh I couldn’t join any of the regular pregnancy boards either, i would love to be so naïve and sure about the future outcome of a pregnancy again though. Feel a bit jealous of them! I’m 9+1 now and still wearing a pad everyday just in case.
Hope everyone has had a good weekend x

theAntsareMyFriends · 17/06/2019 08:56

I hope everyone had a nice and worry free weekend. I never get round to going on mumsnet at home (I'm currently at work) so have a few pages to catch up on.

I completely get the jinxing it thing too. My last MC started 2 days after my booking in appointment so I kept putting this one off too. The first MC started after going to a particular town and I refused to go there again until after my 12weeks scan. I'm normally a totally sane and rational person but when pregnant get all sorts of weird superstitions. I keep seeing single magpies and saw a dead bird yesterday and thought it must be a sign. Crazy I know but I can't seem to help it. I think I'm just projecting my nerves onto something.

@InDreamland I completely get the worry about MC spoiling things for you. I'm going away this weekend and really worried things will go wrong before then and ruin it.

@UnicornsandRainbows1 I also can't join the ante-natal groups even though there are a few people in the Jan board who have also suffered losses. Its just seems like too big of a step. This is the only board I've joined as it really helps me.

tinatsarina · 17/06/2019 10:09

I feel like I'm constantly checking. @InDreamland I feel like I'm about to start and the extra cm isn't helping everytime I feel it it's like omg is this it starting. I feel slight cramps but I was lying awkwardly last night cuz our son was in bed with us so not sure if backache is from that

MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue · 17/06/2019 11:21

@InDreamland – I hold my breath every time I go to the toilet before I look at the tissue and whilst I have stopped wearing pads, I make sure I am carrying some heavy duty ones in whatever bag I am using whenever I go out. The memory of my MC and even the bleeding with my ectopic is so fresh I am always expecting it even after three positive scans and at 11 weeks. I don’t think it will ever go away sadly.

Totally agree @Kintan, I am also really jealous of those people. It must be so nice to live in a blissful ignorance of all the things that can go wrong, to look forward to scans, to plan and feel confident about the future. In contrast, I always feel like I am mentally preparing for the worst outcome. I can’t let go and believe for long, because if I do it will get taken away from me and hurt even more if that makes sense.

Newbie21 · 17/06/2019 15:05

Hi ladies. I am totally with you all and the paranoia each time I go to the loo. I also no longer feel pregnant and I can't remember if on my previous pregnancies I felt pregnant all the time. For those of you with sore boobs, are they sore all the time or does it come and go? I've never had sore boobs before but have done on this pregnancy but today they don't hurt. So naturally I'm assuming the worst. I'm only just over 6 weeks.

tinatsarina · 17/06/2019 15:32

@Newbie21 mine disappeared yesterday but tender again today.
I'm only 3+5 but getting waves of nausea today. Anyone else getting that so early?

Amanda81 · 17/06/2019 15:40

Hey @Newbie21 - for me the boob pain has been a constant fluctuation, and is so frigging annoying. It completely went at 9 weeks, but came back a couple of days later. Tbh it is worse in the evening and say if I have been in one position for a while and then move I feel the heaviness (that's without wearing a bra). Symptoms are a real pain in the ass as they play with the mind 😬😬😬 the waves of nausea for me @tinatsarina seem to be at its worse if I am hungry, have a tight waistband, or have eaten too much. This is gradually easing now. I have my 12 week dating scan tomorrow (at 12+5) and am very nervous. Expecting to hear the worst, but am hopeful for good news.

theAntsareMyFriends · 17/06/2019 15:47

@Newbie21 I haven't had sore boobs but did have nausea that went at 6 weeks and hasn't really come back. I had a scan at 6+4 so it wasn't a bad sign. I've heard that something to do with the placenta changes at 6 weeks and so symptoms can disappear or change at around this point. Its always so worrying when symptoms go but you might find they are back again in a few days.

Sorry if TMI but my discharge has gone quite dark yellow today. In the low light of my bathroom this morning I thought it was pink and panicked but it is definitely yellow and not pink. Really worried its the start of something bad as I've had stomach cramps as well today. My last MC was at 12weeks and I'm 11+1 today so just hoping that history doesn't repeat itself for me.