Pregnancy after m/c (part 7), true hand-holding and support along the road...

[Uki]

Thought I'd start this in honour of Purple's effort so far, hope you don't mind Purple I liked this title best.

Welcome to our shiny new thread

Jules - your dh sounds like a wonderfully unique man. What a sweetheart! So pleased about the good scan result too!!!

Firststar - I was doing my birth plan yesterday and it brought the memories back a bit. I remember very clearly being induced, the contractions kicking in and then being stuck on the ward with two other poor women who were waiting to be induced having to listen to me! Cue chat with dh last night which again demonstrated that I couldn't actually remember that much about the whole experience. Thank god for gas and air!!

Message withdrawn

Message withdrawn

Can't remember if I mentioned this before, but I actually had to ask dh if ds had vernix on him as I couldn't remember! My mum's chemo finished a couple of weeks ago and the tumor has reduced massively in size. She is now going for a second opinion before either radiotherapy or, possibly, surgery. She had radiotherapy with her breast cancer and it was really exhausting for her - worse than the chemo, actually - so I am hoping she won't have to go thorugh it again.

Is your dh nervous? My dh did say last night that I didn't have any idea how difficult it was for him to see me in labour and not really be able to do anything much to help, other than offer words of encouragement. I do remember him offering me a date (which we had taken for energy) and me not being able to face anything to eat. It was the only positive thing he could do and it took a lot of self-control to decline politely at that point!!

Dear all
It's ages since I've posted on here, I am sorry. I'm now at 23 wks and was really truly starting to believe it might actually turn into a baby, but I had a scan last week which showed I have (at the moment) complete placenta previa (for those who like me until last week are thinking WTF is placenta previa, it's where the placenta is covering the cervix so the baby can't get out. As well as the obvious consequence of having to have a ceasarean section there are other exciting risks like 'catastrophic haemorrhage' which can potentially lead to v. early delivery. Good, huh?).
So now I'm trying not to knicker-check every two minutes, with pretty limited success I must say. Why can't it be straightforward for us all?? I feel v. cross with the world, at the moment. But then I feel guilty because I have made it this far and I can feel the small person tumbling about, and in fact saw it playing with its own feet last week, which was magical.
Positive thoughts, positive thoughts, positive thoughts. To those of you coping with family illness as well as your own feelings, lots of love - you're amazing.

Hi everyone. I've crept over from the ttc after mc thread after getting a bfp yesterday (and another today in case yesterday was a fluke ) But for some reason I feel like a charlatan being here! Did anyone else feel like that? It feels really presumptuous to be on a pregnancy thread as I simply can't believe it's true and am so frightened and not excited at all. Every blood free toilet visit feels like a major triumph but it feels impossibly long to wait even for 8 wks and an early scan (which was when I mc last time). It seems so sad that it will be so hard to enjoy this pregnancy though I suppose I don't care at all how bad the pg is so long as there is a baby at the end of it!

And I'm ridiculously teary and depressed and nearly cried on the bus reading about the woman who got trapped in the flood, gave birth to twins at 21 weeks in her home and they died after being airlifted to hospital (the twins, not her)...

Well there's a cheery message to start off with!! Does it get easier or should I resign myself to knicker checking for the next 8 months (fingers crossed)?

Evening all.

Well, I am still feeling quite positive today. Iknow yesterdays scan doesn't mean much in the grand scheme of things, but I think knowing it is in the right place is as good as it gets at the moment, so I'm just going to have to chill out. I mean, what will be will be! Also, am really beginning to feel crap now - never sick, me, just feel like it pretty much all day every day, and every day has now begun! Have already slept 2 hours this afternoon and am ready to head back to bed now. My poor children - what a dull summer holiday they look to be in for!

Griffin, so sorry to hear about your dad But as others have said, cancer isn't always what we think it is, so fingers crossed. And remember, growning bubba's can be very resilient so don't worry yourself even more by thinking that your worry and grief will do it harm.

Fingerbobs, how awful! Did they say how it will be progressed! I mean, will you have regular scans? And is placenta previa not the thing that can change as baby and womb grow, etc? If yes, doesn't that mean that the placenta can "move" back up the uterine wall? A worrying time, but try not to stress too much about it. I'm sure that you and baby willboth be fine.

Mrsmc, how big are your trews exactly if they can manage to fit both you and I in them????

Congrats Siameez! I know what you mean about feeling odd. This early stage is somewhat of a limbo! This is the only place I feel that I belong at the moment as I am far too uncomfortable to join an actual antenatal thread. Much better here where I know I can be happy or worried or anything else at all, and there are always people here with the right response!

Firststar, what on earth are you still doing here??????? Go and give birth for goodness sake

Just wanted to say a quick hello to Siameez - welcome!!

Can I join you for a bit of hand-holding please..... just got my bfp, only 9dpo and very faint, but there. I miscarried on the 2 July at 5weeks and 1 day. This time I am feeling very nervous.... dh is not even with me I can't tell him on the phone. I am shaking with a mix of excitment and fear.

Rainbow days- WELCOME, you'll get plenty of handholding here. I think it's a good sigh you have a BFP already, you have a strong baby there, maybe Two

Siameez - WELCOME, you sound like you have some good preggy hormones too, all the worrying and being sensitive to news sounds positive to me IYKWIM. You will get to enjoy pg and then even dreed all the uncomfortableness. It doesn't seem like long ago at all that i got my BFP, but could almost be any day for me.

Firstar- how's your due date going???? Doing anything special
I did/didn't fall in love with the house today. while it had alot going for it, we would of needed to do so much, and have just done all that here. so not up to another challenge yet.

Jules- congrat's on scan and cute dp won't be long till next scan, yay

Griffin- Hope you can cheer up a little, your dad and baby may be true fighters. I hope so, it will help if you can be positive for both, but i know it's hard.

Mump- i'm much better thank you. Still have niggly cough and bladder problem though how's the pains? i've had loads of pressure/ uncomfortableness today. can't quite remember that with ds, but making it hard to be mobile now.
Our ds has been sleeping till 8;30am which is bliss, he does wake up though, but i love not having to get up early, it's too cold here right now.

Hope everyone else is well and staying out of flood waters. I even had a dream about floods last night and i'm the other side of the world, weird.

Morning all!

Fingerbobs - did they say whether it is likely that the placenta will move? You're only just half-way through and if the baby does most of its growing in the last three months, I would have thought you're in with a reasonable chance. But how scary! Take it easy and make sure you don't do any heavy lifting!

Siameez - congratulations and welcome to the thread! As Uki says, there must be loads of pg hormones buzzing around your body so that's got to be a good sign! I don't think I joined an antenatal thread until after my dating/viability scan at 8 weeks where they picked up a strong hb. I know exactly how you feel!

Rainbowdays - congratulations and welcome to you too!! I remember I was SO nervous before I did the pg test that I actually felt sick and spent about an hour psyching myself up to it. At least I was able to call dh though! What a nice surprise for your dh when he gets home though!!

Uki - glad to hear that you're over your cold. I am also regretting not doing LOADS of pelvic floor exercises when I was pg with ds! Think bubba is applying quite a bit of pressure to my poor bladder... The pain seems better today - think Glimmer was right and it is just gas caused by sudden increase in beans!! But my whole lower abdomen aches and I think that is simply from the weight of bubba/muscles stretching and the fact that I am still carting ds around...

I'm okay today. Ds "grumbled" a couple of times in the night, but no nightmares and he slept in (again) until 06:40 so am beginning to hope that the return to 05:00 waking was just a blip! Really hope so as I desperately need sleep... Think he might have an inkling that there is something going on as he is ultra-clingy with me at the moment... Poor little thing!

congrats to everyone with a bfp and good news re scan feedmenow. Mrs McJnr - I have been advised by my friends dh (who is an obs/gynae)that aspirin and heparin may be useful in next pregnancy because not all thrombophilias are detected and that this treatment regime is not harmful as prophylaxis. Is it Clexane that you are taking? At what point did you start it? He told me to take it from the time there is a foetal heartbeat but that the aspirin can be taken pre-conception. Does that tie in with what you were advised?

Hello ladies

Hey Griffintribe ? hope today is a better day and am sending you lots of positive vibes sorry to hear about your Dad hope that he is treatable and better then you expect. I thought I?d share a story about a friend as it may help, she MC her 1st baby, her 2nd was ectopic and she had to wait 3 months to try again, it took a while and then her 3rd pregnancy was twins and she lost one early and was told she?d surely lose the other, amazingly, the little bean held on and she was elated (but terrified as you can imagine) at 14 weeks, her sister, who had just had a baby 6 weeks earlier was killed in a car crash and she looked after her 2 nephews and the new baby. She said the only thing
that got her through the day and made her eat and sleep during that awful time was knowing that the baby inside her had to be given every thing she could give it to survive. That child is 5 now and she truly believes that it was her DD who helped her (and the wider family) get over the grief. Root for that baby hon!

Mumpbump ? hey you it might not have been the gas and air, my sis didn?t take anything with DS1 (she was terrified of throwing up) and even so, she cannot recall anything for the 1st 20 mins after the birth, it?s all on video, her dressing DS1 and chatting away but she doesn?t remember a thing about it, weird hey!?

Hey Jules so glad your scan went well your DP sounds so sweet!

Fingerbobs ? hello and nice to meet you so sorry that you have this stress at this stage, it must be worrying but at least they now know about it and will be watching you carefully. Hope you manage to go a lot longer without any issues. That is so sweet that you saw your little one playing with its feet ? how cool is that! Hold onto that hon and I wish you al the very best.

Ohhhhhh Siameez ? that?s wonderful congratulations and welcome!! It is hard to believe when it happens I know! This is exactly where you belong though as we have all felt the way you do right now the first weeks are long and stressful but we?ll help you through how awful about that woman and her twins It does get easier, I promise but the knicker checking is probably an obsession that you?ll be stuck with for life I?m afraid.

Feedmenow ? good for you feeling positive! We can only take things a stage at a time and like you I felt that the first scan confirming things were in the right place was a stepping stone in the right direction

Oh Rainbowdays I actually have tears in my eyes I am so happy to see you here with us. Wonderful news Sending you lots of lucky and sticky vibes for your LO. Deep breaths, take each day as it comes and talk to us lots and we?ll help you

Hey Uki sorry the house wasn?t perfect and that you are not feeling 100% yet. Take care of you!

Hello LadyLush ? how are you holding up hon? That?s interesting what your friend?s DH said. I?m sure that?s true. They can?t test your blood for clotting issues when you are already pregnant apparently so many people just can?t find out in time. I have noticed on here that there are quite a few ladies on this drug combo for a number of different reasons, some due to multiple MCs. It is Clexane I take (well inject) and 75mg of aspirin daily. In fact, naughty though it was, after I got diagnosed and before I started seeing the Consultant Haematologist, I started taking aspirin off my own back and I was glad I did as it was the first thing I was told to do when I did see her (I was pregnant by then ? 4+6) I started the Clexane at 5+6 once they had confirmed that Beanie was not ectopic and in the right place. The danger before then is that if ectopic it could have been a danger to me thinning my blood. My Consultant feels that the Clexane should be started as early as this can be confirmed. I must have started on the aspirin on about cd1 or 2 of the cycle I conceived. Hope that helps. Lesley Regan?s book on Miscarriage has a good section on all of this.

BTW, Haylstones has posted about some spotting... I have never had spotting in pg except for when I had m/c so not really able to speak from experience, but I'm sure I remember others on here having spotting in pgs - just can't remember who!!

Haylstones thread

Thanks for all your messages! It is very possible that the placent will 'move' (actually it's that bit of the uterus that moves, taking the placenta with it) away; unfortunately there are no nice solid numbers, just things like '34 per cent of all previa persists when measured at 22 weeks; complete previa is more likely to persist' so you can't even do some proper statistically-based worrying. The really weird thing I think is trying to hold two totally opposite scenarios and plan for them both at the same time - if I have to have a ceasarian, trying to make it as ok as possible (unless of course it's an emergency one...) but still attempting to get on hands and knees for the 15 mins a day to coax the baby into the right position should it become possible for it to make an entrance that way too.
But the baby is rollicking about and that's the main thing I keep hanging onto. Hope everyone else is doing ok - and thanks for the beetroot tip on iron, as I didn't know that and I'm supposed to be beefing up (arf!) my intake.

Thanks so much Mumpbump, I appreciate it. I haven't been posting much because I've been in denial slightly and mentally preparing myself for the worst to happen . Don't know what's going on, will hopefully find out tomorrow but if bleedign gets worse then I suppose I'll know what outcome is

Well, I do know someone who bled after sex in pg and had an otherwise straight-forward pg. Killed off their sex life for a bit though!!

Is the bleeding actually getting heavier? If so, you could always go to A&E this afternoon. I think they'll scan you.

Posted for you on the other thread Haylstones - keep positive hon, nature is a funny, funny thing x

did you go to EPU haylstone?

Thank you everybody! rainbowdays, let's hold hands together

Just booked an early scan for 8 weeks. Really wanted 7 weeks but we're away camping with DH's family that week and I don't know how I'm going to get through it not knowing! But the idea of scanning the week before and getting an inconclusive or even worse result doesn't bear thinking about.

Good luck Haylstones. My friend who had multiple miscarriages bled through her two successful pregnancies too so you never can tell.

Thanks for support everyone. Bleeding has almost stopped, just a small amount when I wipe and is dark brown- nothing fresh since during the night. EPU will see me at 8.30 tomorrow morning. I haven't had a scan yet as I wasn't 'allowed' so I have no idea if everything is as it should be. I feel Ok other than that, just v tired so went back to bed at 9.30 and slept for 2 hours. I was awake for ages during the night!
It's scary because the only successful pg I have had didn't involve any early bleeding!