Fresh Start thread for pregnancy after miscarriage or loss - 2

[Labmum]

New thread, perhaps might be useful to all post an update of history and where we're at now?

@AnneLovesGilbert, @Paranormalbouquet, @Miami81, @hopefulforourrainbow, @HidCat, @NoCats, @beanhunter, @iswallowtoothpaste, @vuduvu, @whiteonesugar, @wishingoneastar77, @NoParticularPattern

Apologies to anyone I've missed, please tag them and let them know of the new thread.

I feel very strange really. It's all just such a relief to have a date. Feels strange to know when baby will be here at the latest.
The randoms are all very well meaning, but really it's not them making the decisions.

Eeek 2 weeks will fly in @Miami!
I heard the heartbeat for the first time today! It's all becoming so real! They let me record it so dh could hear it too as he was at work. I keep listening to it over and over again ❤

@Miami that's great news you have a date! Will definitely be good to speak to your main consultant next week and get clear on the meds situation. Did they say anything about her position? Did they say anything to reassure you about the cord prolapse risks if she's still transverse?

@Anne I got a few period type pains and lots of intense Braxton Hicks in the 2/3 weeks before her arrival this time round.

Cross post @hopeful! That's lovely! 💓

Oh hopeful it’s just the absolute best isn’t it So happy for you. I never thought to record it but what a good idea! Enjoy. Feeling kicks and rolls and seeing it move around are so special too, won’t be long.

Thank you lab, so it’s not imminent! Really freaked me out but good chance to practise my breathing...

Do you feel you can plan miami? We’re all going to be on tenterhooks!

Hey @Labmum they didn't seem that concerned with position they just reiterated that if I am at all twingey to go straight in.
Due to her position I haven't had any Braxton Hicks at all. So I imagine at some stage I will experience that and head up to hospital in a panic. We shall see.
Not doing too bad with planning @AnneLovesGilbert we went and panic bought some more stuff in mothercare after today's appointment. Mainly a breast pump and disposable knickers for the hospital bag. And a hat, with ears, because really how could we not.
Need to get a steriliser and some more Moses basket sheets tomorrow.
We are both in shock a small bit I think.

I’ve never set foot in a mothercare! Been very lazy and got most bits off amazon and eBay but you’ve reminded me I keep meaning to! Also need hospital knickers. Black and just bigger than normal okay?

We’re off away Thursday and I need to pack the bloody bag just in case... I think a wee bit of shock is probably normal You guys are a good team and you’ve got yourselves sorted by the sounds of things. How long will DH have off?

BH not at all how I’d imagined they’d be. I spent a whole day thinking the baby was randomly stretching it’s bsck out in the middle of my bump (clueless! ) before googling and realising it’s me, not it. Sometimes esp post dtd it feels tight in a circle around my belly button but it’s now that and then also the whole thing going rock hard and going a sort of cone shape. All very odd the first time stuff happens.

Try asda for moses basket sheets @Miami. They've got a great sale on. I ordered some online along with a few other things.
I have been feeling kicks already @Anne but have an anterior placenta so think I'm missing a lot too. There doesn't seem to be any pattern yet but maybe too early for that. Hope you have a lovely time away.
Hubby and I are going pram shopping on sat, then for some spa treatments (any of you had a pregnancy massage?) and then out for dinner. Looking forward to spending some time together.

@AnneLovesGilbert I had a really detailed chat with my sis about knickers she said be careful not to go too big as then those horrid maternity pads can just feel less secure/ slide around. So I have ended up with two different sized black cheap packs from Asda and then the £2.50 disposable ones from mothercare just in case.
Her other top tip - compression. It may feel counterintuitive but actually that feeling of being held together (especially after section) is good. So no point going too big.
I have purchased a kind of post surgery belly band thing that she said was great.
Tip from another lady who has had a vaginal and an abdominal birth - you think you will want to be in your maternity leggings straight away but you have either just been split open or pushed a baby out, she said she ended up crying trying to get her leggings on, she just could not bend over at all on the first day. So her husband brought in a pair of loose joggers with a elasticated waist and tie. She could just step into these and he pulled them up and tied them.
Going to have a look around the internet today for any other hints and tips for csection recovery.

@Hopefulforourrainbow enjoy Pram shopping.
Another anterior placenta? Jeepers we must have quite a high proportion of anteriors. Maybe they are more common then I thought.

Haha I was thinking that too! I think they are quite common. Just frustrating that movement isn't felt so much early on. A couple of my friends had anterior placenta and they've both had girls. Apparently more common in girls. I'm convinced I'm having a boy but will wait and find out when he/she arrives.
My friend used a maternity pad inside the front of her knickers after c section for extra padding.

@Anne I went for one size up to pre-pregnancy and go for full briefs! They're obscenely massive but would go up high enough to go above a section scar and keep a maternity pad nice and secure. If planning for a vaginal delivery I bought "spritz for bitz" which was lovely and soothing on my stitches. Also take in loads of maternity pads especially if planning to breast feed, don't go for slim ones. Also go for washable breast pads, they're so much nicer than disposables.

@hopeful pregnancy massages are lovely, enjoy!

Hello all!
Can I join in?
I refuse to join on my Antenatal chat group because I'm nervously pg after 4 MCs and they're all annoyingly nonchalant with their firsts, just like I was!

I had a MMC at 11 weeks and three MCs at between 6-8 weeks, I'm now 16+3 weeks (due end of July) but, as I'm sure you all understand, won't be quite happy until baby is here breathing and screaming at me!

I also have a 4yo DD who has kept me very sane throughout the last 2 years.

Yesterday I had my 16 wk MW appt, heard the heartbeat which completely reassured me but I'm sure I'll be wobbling again before my 20wk scan.

Just want to join in some excited chat but didn't want to jinx things (isn't it ridiculous!) by assuming all is well and plonking myself on the AC club.

Hope everyone is well

Hi @DontBuyANewMumCashmere and welcome. I know the feeling re the groups. I joined mine eventually but am very light touch with it.
Congratulations on your pregnancy. The gaps between appointments are hard but you will be surprised how quickly you get to the next one.

Hello and welcome! Congratulations on your pregnancy! This is a fantastic group. I'd be lost without these ladies!

Completely shattered but quick update. Scan all good, head down and back to belly, lovely sonographer and lots of detail. Probably last scan!

Consultant was away but saw a nice reg and decided to stay on both meds for another two weeks then back to see consultant (clinic only fortnightly). I texted him to ask if I had questions after did he mind, had a nice reply and then a voicemail tonight checking it all went okay. I love that man.

Like miami if I go into labour I’ll skip next dose but otherwise carrying on and reg was very happy and just said to keep an eye on movements but all good.

The baby we playing with its feet

Sounds like your consultant is amazing @Anne. I'm yet to come across one like that! I was put on green pathway at 13 weeks so unless a problem arises I'm just under midwife care though I do have a reassurance/growth scan at 28 weeks. Lying in bed just now feeling baby move. It's making me not want to get up!

How is everyone this grey Monday?

Hope you're enjoying your time off hopeful!

Hey it's been a lovely sunny day here! And it's the last day of my annual leave 😭 back tomorrow for a 0900-2130 shift. Don't know how in going to cope as I seem to completely crash and have zero energy by mid afternoon. I'm thinking about finishing work a week earlier and finishing at 33 weeks instead of 34. I think it would be different if I was sat at a desk most of the time. Trip to mothercare at weekend didn't go to plan. Car seat base wouldn't fit in my car as I have underfloor storage. Got it booked in to garage next week as I don't want to not use isofix. Also cant believe how heavy prams are! Think I just need to man up and stop being such a weakling though. Haven't felt much in the way of movement today. Not really getting much of a pattern yet though yesterday was a very wriggly day. Saying that I didn't move far from the sofa yesterday!
How was your weekend away?
Hows everyone else?

Brightened up a lot here today which is nice.

Hope your shift isn't too brutal, I'll be honest, it sounds horrendous and I don't know how you do it, so huge admiration! How are your feet and ankles at the moment?

I have a desk job, and can be flexible and wfh if I need to and I'm rapidly running out of steam now, so definitely go as early as you need. A couple of weeks ago I thought I'd want to push on by another week in case I end up overdue, but fuck it, I'm tired and I ache and I want time for naps.

Mine moves much more when I'm resting and even more when I'm on my left side, either leaning while sitting or lying down, the movement the you're up and about rocks them to sleep I think, and also distracts you from feeling it as much. I don't remember when I felt a proper pattern but it look a while and then one day you realise it's several times an hour no matter what you're doing! I'm going to miss it.

I have very weak wrists and sod all upper body strength and our eBay mini city jogger pram is super light and collapses when you pull a belt/strap thing in the seat - just folds in half flat! I was very impressed. The car seat was bought for the same reasons, I could lift it the easiest and it's meant to be very safe. However heavy anything seems empty imagine it full of baby so shop around till you find what you're properly comfy with.

@hopeful you may already know but you can buy underfloor box fillers from your car's manufacturers which mean the isofix base legs can then rest on top of them.

I finished at 33weeks this time due to when Christmas fell and I was definitely ready for it by then. My job involves a lot of time on my feet although thankfully no shift work so I wanted time to rest up before baby arrived.

Hi ladies. Can I ask a question to anyone who has had a csection? I think @Paranormalbouquet had one.
Anyway we are booked for section next week at 37+5. Which I was happy with. Now the consultants are saying that if we could at all go to 38+5 that would be best for babies lungs. They mentioned that some research into the steroids implies that they may have some developmental risk associated with them (although the only study I can find is so small as to almost be useless) and said that at 38+5 the baby wouldn't need the steroids.
So now I am so confused. I don't want to harm my baby but I really really need her to be born. I need to see her and know that she is here and that she has made it through the shit show that Is my womb. And that extra week feels like a millennium.
My question is did anyone have a term csection (>37 wks) with or without the steroids and what was the advice you received.

Hi Miami. You are so close now my love. You can do this.

I had my section at 38+6. I was admitted at 38+0 because she was transverse with unstable lie and they gave me steroids on admission. No-one bothered to explain why but I assumed it was because she was also measuring on the small side and smaller babies are generally better off being born vaginally for their lungs which wasn't an option for us. I was happy to accept them because as you say there is no strong evidence that they cause harm and I was happy to take anything that might help. They hurt like a bitch though!

Have you got any more appointments or scans between now and then? Or could you ring and speak to your consultant about it? How would you feel about going another week? I have absolutely everything crossed for you.

Hi @Miami81 not a c section but ds was born by (semi) planned induction at 37+2.. We weren't given steroids where I am the policy seemed to be you don't need steroids after 37 weeks. I think that my ds might have benefited from the steriods though.. He needed some oxygen when born briefly (Less than a few hours on cpap - he was off it by the time we even got to see him for the first time although they did pump oxygen into his incubator for a few days just to make things easier for him) and had a pnuemothorax also.. Although maybe it wouldn't have made a difference I'm not sure.. If i could go back in time I would have insisted on being given the steroids and c-section/ induction at 35 weeks when it was talked about due to reduced movements and ctg before it was then decided that actually he was doing OK and could just wait.. My original induction was booked for 38 weeks and I'm glad we didn't wait to then.
Saying all that ds is now a healthy and happy almost 1 year old and if you met him now you wouldn't know he was so small and sick when he was first born..
When I researched the steroids one study I say said it might increase risk of adhd but it is a small link .. I figured if I needed to make the decision I'd rather take that small risk that the bigger risk of something being wrong with their lungs..

We have an isofix base but find the infant seat is more steady and baby is less likely to tilt forward when secured by seatbelt actually, worth looking at the angle of the seat of your car before you decide which to use. Several of my postnatal yoga group have found the same.

With prams think about what you need before discounting any for bring the wrong size etc. My bugaboo isn’t great for car journeys but we live in London and rarely drive. It fits fine on London bus. Locally and day to day I walk everywhere so the big wheels are lovely and it turns on a pin so I’d perfect for shops. If I drove a lot something which folds small easily would be a bigger priority.

I worked until 37+0 and only had a few days before baby arrived. Would have liked a few extra days!!