Mother in law doesn’t want us to tell the family we are pregnant

[Julia124]

So we told our mother in law last week that we are expecting, I had my 12 week scan that day and we told her straight after. He reaction was to cry and cry and say that we wouldn’t be able to do it etc. Which I’m still pretty hurt by. A week on she’s asked us not to announce the pregnancy to the rest of his family until she’s had times to come to terms with it. I don’t know if it’s just pregnancy hormones but I’m so annoyed about it. It’s our first child and I’m excited and want to be able to discuss it but she wants us to stay silent. Am I overreacting? Should we be giving her more time to adjust until we tell other people?

Your mil sounds like a twat.
CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR NEWS

tell everyone, I’m sure your other friends and family will be bloody chuffed for you.

You need to do what you want. Not mil

Congratulations !

I don't understand though.Why would you not be able to do it ?

Also if you don’t mind me asking is their any reason your mil needs to come to terms with it and thinks you can’t do it?

CONGRATULATIONS!

Tell her fuck off and share your lovely news

Is there any reason for her reaction ....are you both young teenagers for example, or is MIL strange?
Congrats btw

Your already 12weeks (which is a fair time to wait to tell people) but I would tell everyone bc leaving it any longer would upset my family.

WTF!? She doesn’t get to decide when you announce it!!!

Announce it, you're the one that's pregnant not her. If she doesn't like tell her to get stuffed.

Congratulations on your news! What the hell is wrong with her? Why would she need 'time to come to terms with it'? Tell her to fuck off! Announce your pregnancy to anyone and everyone you want to and do not let this woman dictate what you do and make this about her. If you let her think she can control things now then imagine what she will be like once you have the baby and she is a grandparent 😩

Good luck and don't take any shit

Congratulations
What does your DH say ?

Our MIL?

Under normal circumstances ignore her... That's a very odd reaction!

Are you very young and still in education, or do you live with parents and have no way to support yourselves?

Those would be the only reasons her reaction might make sense...

You need to nip this shit in the bud. MIL is not in charge of your lives, she doesn't get a vote on your decisions and definitely not a deciding vote. What next, she doesn't think you've decided the right name for the baby, so she wants you to change it?! She doesn't like your parenting choices so she expects you to do it her way? Fuck that noise.

You tell whoever the hell you want when you want. If that's now, so be it. She has to deal with her issue (she feels too young to be a GM?) herself.

I don't see why other people knowing would make the slightest difference to her 'coming to terms with it'?

Did she have a horrible time herself - this would suggest something like a history of postnatal psychosis or a traumatic birth?

Thank you for all your responses, myself and my partner are in our early 20’s we have been together for over a year and we live together in our own place.

She is being utterly unreasonable. Does she resent your relationship with your OH or is she upset at becoming a granny?
Tell who you like... and congrats!

Are you financially dependant on MIL?

No we both work and get our bills paid every month

Are you married to her son-is she your MIL or partner’s mum? She sounds horrible!

Fuck what she wants, it's not her news to decide when and where you tell people

Congratulations
Your body your pregnancy your rules. Put your foot down now and take ownership of it or your gonna have a nightmare when the baby comes along. What a horrible way for her to react. Go and celebrate your brilliant news with anyone and everyone xx

Seems very odd, has their been a 2nd trimester loss in the family? Or is she being a drama queen? Why doesn't your dp just tell his family himself?

I didn't share the news until 18 weeks admittedly because that's when the only scan was, but despite us being young and not being married no one cared, if you are financially stable then why is she upset? Odd!

Has she told you why she is so upset? Have you asked her?

Congratulations! Announce away. She probably thinks she's younger than she is and isn't mentally prepared to be called ' grandma'

This is your news not hers. She doesn’t get to decide when to channel it through the family.

Get your DP to call his most gossipy auntie, Uncle or cousin tonight.

Exact same thing happened with my mil. Things only went down hill because we never stood up to her. Despite the horrible reaction she was overbearing and demanding when it came to our child. It got bad, like really bad. She is now cut out of our lives.
Is there a particular reason she's being like this? Are you two teenagers living under her roof with no jobs, or is she just plain nasty like my mil.
Speak up for yourself now, your pregnancy is about you, your partner and your baby not her. Tell everyone you want too and don't dance to her tune. Congratulations