Pregnancy 12 week + post IVF/infertility - general chat and support

[Janefx40]

I thought I would start a thread for those of us pregnant post IVF/infertility. There are lots of pregnancy clubs on Mumsnet but it feels like a slightly different experience having got here the hard way!

I've put 12 weeks + because there is another group for women who have just got their BFPs. That is such an anxious time and definitely needs support.

But I thought this group might pick us up a little further along - over the first panic but still learning about the experience.

Not being exclusive tho - if you think this is the group for you, come along in...

So come and join us if you would like to xxx

Hello all. Saw a different consultant again today for a Doppler reading and growth scan and he says my blood flow level is good and there is no problem with the umbilical cord and the baby has grown to 5 ib 4 and he thinks the initial sonographer who raised the balloon has got everything wrong. I’m obviously relieved but also can’t help feeling a little miffed that we have been stressing over this for over a week now. However they did a urine test and no at the end and the midwife said I had a couple of positives in my urine and she thinks I have the onset of pre eclampsia and is sending it away for tests and I need to go back in at the beginning of next week for another test too. I’ve had an horrendous headache for a few days but thought it was a head cold, heartburn, nausea and swollen ankles etc. She said pre eclampsia is common with egg donor ivf and I need to go in if I start to see lights before my eyes and have any pains in my chest.

barcelo good news with regards to your scan. How many weeks are you now? My friend had pre-eclampsia with both her babies and they induced her early. I know it’s worrying but it’s good that they have noticed it (if anything) try not to worry yourself over it x

@fox23 thanks for the suggestion, I'm going to add a pack of changing mats /incontinence pads to my shopping list, might be handy for night changes in the early days too so less cleaning up is needed.
@Barcelo18 glad the blood flow is OK. Guessing all this stress hasn't helped your blood pressure. Hope your symptoms don't get worse and you manage to keep your little one in a bit longer but it's definitely better they know.

I shouldn’t moan as my pregnancy hasn’t been that bad so far. I’m 35 weeks come Monday so know I haven’t got much further to go and am so glad they are keeping an eye on me but have got to the stage now where I’m feeling fed up but then beating myself up as I realise just how lucky we are to have got to this stage x

@Fox23 congratulations on you little baby girl 🥰 we been home for a week now, trying to learn to live all together now 😆 if I show you my pic-you can write a book called “50 shades of purple” just by looking at my eyes..🤦🏻‍♀️ She doesn’t sleep st night and sleeps through the day. Also cot is a No No for her.. ever. Day time sleeps in a pram. So.. u saying midwife doesn’t mind Sleepyhead?! On official website it says “for co-sleeping, sleeping within a cot etc”, but on mothercare website it says “strictly supervised sleeping” 😤😤 I really need solution to make her sleep at night 🤦🏻‍♀️

Best of luck finding a solution @Aliona19. I know it’s not much help but it is pretty common as I think often the motion in the womb during the day helps them sleep so quite often they are used to sleeping then. Just sleep as often as you can yourself when she does sleep and i’m sure you’ll both find your way. The first 6 weeks in particular are very tough!

@swimchick1980 😅 I know everyone says sleep day time. Not easy. Noises around not helping. Also I what things done or simply had a cup of tea using both hands 😅 hope u right and it will change..

@Aliona19 yes, midwife said that Sleepyhead is great. But she did ask if she sleeps in our bed. We had to fess up... I know we should not, but after 3 nights of NO SLEEP... we gave in!!! Midwife didn’t seem to be against it, just said to be careful with duvet accidentally covering her.
Now I sleep with my head half way down bed with feet sticking out, as that way duvet no way can cover her.
So, result over the last 3nights is that me and my DH has gotten proper sleep!!!! My daughter wakes up at 12, 2 and 4 and I only get her changed and feed her with the prepared bottle (she is still to lazy to accept breastfeeding 😟) so all in all I’m awake 20 min with each time she is awake. With all those loo brakes in later stage of my pregnancy I can honestly say I’m getting more sleep now...
Ok, it may all change any day...
Oh and I ordered Chicco as you can fit Sleepyhead inside and push against the bed, without actually cosleeping

@swimchick1980, Barcelo18, @Liverpool19 any news regarding your little buns in the oven? 👶

@Fox23 I don’t even mind sleeping without blanket, just worried is actual pod safe? Like if she turn her face to the side will she able to breath? I took side of her cot anyway and moved to my bed, but this just doesn’t help. She only sleeps in her pram day time and on me st night. So my partner goes to bed like 6 pm and gets up around 1/2 am and then I go to sleep. Not great 🤦🏻‍♀️ Day time she sleeps nice 3/4 hours intervals, sometimes have to wake her up to feed. And my midwife doesn’t seem to like anything 😤 don’t sleep with her don’t use this shampoo don’t use cream-use sunflower oil instead.. argh

@Barcelo18 it’s ok to stress, there is no other way. Even night before my section I was terrified what if baby decides to come right now and I won’t make it to hospital and will bleed to death. And also they told me I am high risk (after blood test) of pre eclampsia although my blood pressure was always low. They put it in my head and made me feel much worse. And at the end of it-I didn’t have any preeclampsia. Hang on there, it will all happen at perfect time xx

@Aliona19 pod is safe, as I tried to stick my face in it, to check- totally breathable material. I have not washed her yet at all, was told that until belly button falls off not to. And yes, if you have to, use oil. I haven’t, just waiting to be able to bath her. In regards to chicco or any other side by side bed, I hope that being in the Sleepyhead in the chicco would keep her out of bed. At the moment I don’t get deep sleep at night as I’m worried about all sorts...

@Fox23 - no sign yet, this baby needs to get a move on!!

Most of my friends have used the sleepy head in their next to me cots and had no problems, so I didn’t think twice when getting offered one or buying the next to me.
My bun is still in the oven and hoping he stays there until Friday. My boyfriend is away with work until Thursday and my last day is Friday. So he’s welcome anytime after 6pm Friday 🤣

I’ve also bought the next to me and the sleepyhead deluxe to be used in combination. My sister in law has recommended them both and said they are fab !!!
I have confirmed preclampsia. My pcr levels in my urine are high my bp is on the high side but the midwife said they are just waiting for this to catch up so in hospital every other day for bp tests and they’ve said if it goes up anymore then they will admit me for monitoring until they decide to deliver our baby. 35 weeks today so I’m hoping that my bp isn’t up tomorrow or I could be in hospital for a couple of weeks x

Hopefully barcelo you can get through the next two weeks without any problems. Once you are 37 weeks they will happily bring your baby and he will be classed as full term. My niece was born at 37 weeks and was perfectly ok. Do your best not to stress as you BP will be through the roof! X

@Barcelo18 fingers cross your little bun can hold on for two more weeks!
@Liverpool19 anytime after Friday 6pm 😁😁😁 I’m sure he will cooperate with that!
Hope you are not feeling too tired at work! I really can’t believe that you are still working!

He better had do or we will fall out 🤣 I’m ok to be honest fox I’m not really doing anything tomorrow I’m only in half a day and then have a scan, Wednesday I’m only half day as I see the consultant. Then Thursday and Friday I won’t be doing much again. Today is the best I’ve felt in weeks which is strange really 😂 x

@Liverpool19 so exciting how close you are. Must be great to be finishing work. I have another 5.5 weeks. Seems like forever.

@Barcelo18 how frustrating about the pre-eclampsia - it's great they have you under obs but you could do without the extra worry I'm sure. Hopefully a mild case and all will be well

Xxx

@Janefx40 only 5,5 weeks!?! Wow! Time is flying! Is that your time left before maternity leave?

8 weeks until I go off on mat leave, one of those is a week of leave and only working one day Christmas week so pretty much 6 weeks of work left, can you tell I'm excited for some time off?!

Yes @Fox23 5.5 weeks til mat leave. 9.5 until the baby!

We've just got home from hypnobirthing (was good by the way) and seen a fox in our neighbours window. They are nice people tho we've not seen much of them. Bit chaotic possibly. Have dogs that bark a lot at night but luckily far enough away that it doesn't disturb us really but I always feel sorry for the people actually next door. But there was a fox in the window and it's freaked me out hugely. I suddenly feel like it's not safe here for a baby. But probably I'm over reacting. But very weird and unsettling to see

@Janefx40 just finished 5am feed.., don’t worry about foxes, really. They don’t trust people and are scared of them. The stories you hear are one in a million (unfortunately, dogs are much more likely to attack), as foxes attack only when threatened, trapped or protecting cubs. But hey, see my mumsnet name... I just love them 🦊
Wow, you are almost there! Baby is just around the corner!!!’ When is your next scan? Is she kicking you a lot?
Mine was hiccuping all the time. Now that she is here she still does, strange to see her doing the same in my belly and now 😁

Thanks @Fox23 was it you in the window? I know you're right and I calmed down a lot. But it seemed so freaky last night. I am prone to anxiety and it just kicked me off to feeling like the world is unsafe. It is odd tho right?! Next midwife, consultant and scan all a week on Friday

Yes baby is super kicky and rolls around a lot. I love it! I've not quite worked out which is the hicupping yet. What does it feel like?

How is baby Alice?

@Janefx40 I’m just sad fox lady who has a major soft spot for foxes. What can I say, we all have odd likes and dislikes 🦊
Hiccups are actually quite annoying - they are repetitive and sudden, like your own hiccups- they have set interval between them, then jump, then wait, then jump- trust me, you will recognise !
I’m very odd that way as I don’t and never have had hiccups so I had to google 😆😆
I think being anxious is soooo normal! If you wasn’t then I would be worried ! You have had such a long journey to be where you are now ! And with only weeks left before the big day - it’s only normal to worry and stress over everything.
Alice is fantastic - really, she is! And so will your little girl be😁
I posted card of her to our hospital- you know that success wall? I remember how much it inspired me and gave me hope, so I thought our picture may give hope to others.

jane when i work my shifts and coming home at 1/2am there was always a fox on my estate. I think they only bother you if you bother them. Soon as it seen my car lights it used to run! I can’t believe you only have 9 weeks left!!
emalady that will be here in no time at all!

Thanks ladies. I think it was more the concept that the neighbour kept it as a pet that seemed odd to me. There were foxes everywhere when I lived in London and it didn't bother me. Ah well!

@emalady 6 weeks of work is nothing!!! Plus a week of leave sounds good. Remind me when your due date is?

@swimchick1980 how are you getting on?

@Aliona19 lovely to hear from you but sorry about the lack of sleep!!! Hope you can find a solution!

Love to everyone else xxx