Pregnancy 12 week + post IVF/infertility - general chat and support

[Janefx40]

I thought I would start a thread for those of us pregnant post IVF/infertility. There are lots of pregnancy clubs on Mumsnet but it feels like a slightly different experience having got here the hard way!

I've put 12 weeks + because there is another group for women who have just got their BFPs. That is such an anxious time and definitely needs support.

But I thought this group might pick us up a little further along - over the first panic but still learning about the experience.

Not being exclusive tho - if you think this is the group for you, come along in...

So come and join us if you would like to xxx

Everyone I know puts their baby’s in car seats with snow suits on 🤷🏼‍♀️ So that’s news to me also. I’ll be putting him in his with a coat/cardi/snowsuit on as it’s not caused any harm to anyone I know.
X

@Fox23 - so exciting, can’t wait to hear the newspaper of your safe arrival.

Maybe i’m wrong but I was told by health visitors etc that the issue is that as the snowsuits are bulky, there is a safety concern when the baby is in the car that if there is an accident the straps won’t have been done tight enough. Cardigans etc are fine, it’s more the bulky ones (www.verywellfamily.com/winter-coats-car-seats-safety-check-293703). It’s probably over the top but I also found that DC1 got quite warm in the car so I had one of those blanket things I mentioned which I wrapped up DC1 in when outside and then loosened off for the car.

*newspaper I meant news - though maybe you will take out a full page spread in the Times

@swimchick1980 I see what you mean about the snowsuit. I also have looked up those wraps. Considering most of us will have cold weather babies, it’s probably something we should consider...I will probably get the wrap 😊
Fingers crossed my baby doesn’t decide that Friday is too long to wait 😧

@Fox23 wow! It’s crazy soon! Hope you manage to relax a bit over the next few days. So exciting!!!

It is meant to be really dangerous to have baby in car seat with thick jacket on. I’ve heard that a lot.

Looking to book my 4d scan. They’re quite expensive! I’m guessing it’s worth it though?!

Xx

@Beherenow32 I can’t believe myself how quickly time has passed! Feels like yesterday we got our BFP. They advise to do 4d 30w + because that’s when baby has fattened up and is starting to look like himself. It cost us about £80-£100 (can’t remember exactly)but I wouldn’t change a thing looking back. As a result we have a beautiful photo of my little one. There are more than one, but we fell in love with that one.
I don’t know how I will relax... I’m glad tomorrow’s appointment will keep my mind occupied for half day. I feel like I’m sitting in nettles- that’s how restless I feel...

@fox23 so exciting! Hope your appointment goes well tomorrow and the little one holds on until Friday for you. Can't believe it's time already!

@Fox23 I’m so happy for you 😊
Thanks for that. Def going to book. Was thinking about 28 weeks, which is just before Xmas...
I’ve had a 4d preview at 16 weeks, which was actually quite good too. think she had a bit more fat than average 🙊 xx

Hey @Fox23 just wishing you good luck for Friday! I meant to have it Friday but they just rang an hour ago and changed it for Thursday 🤦🏻‍♀️ So messed my head up and changed all my plans. Might not have time tomorrow to wish u good luck. Everything crossed for you 😘

@Aliona19 good luck!!!!! I think it’s great to have it moved forward- less time to stress over things!
Lots of love and hope all goes well! Please keep us updated!!!!!!!
💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐💐

Good luck @Aliona19 - can’t wait to hear your happy news

Oh girls 🤦🏻‍♀️ I know it’s less time to stress but I am not ready. We have a dog that need to be dropped off and it’s some drive away. So having one less day is giving me more stress as arrghhh 😖but you r right. Sometimes I feel like I am not even going to make it till Thursday 😂 hardly walking

@Aliona19 when is your final consultation- consent documents, blood tests etc? Also, have they given you time when to be there?

@Fox23 don’t have no final consultation. My last app was 8 of October and that’s when I signed all the forms and received medication for the op. Blood tests must be taken no more than 3 days before op, so going tomorrow. And time, they just say to turn up at 7 and then all depends.. hoping it’s early 😤😤 waking up and not having my tea and biscuits, not happy 😆 for my egg collection I was the last one 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ My blood is Rh negative, they better have some stocked up 😀 are you ready?!? And hahaha forgot to say, just like you I spend day googling about car seat 😂 not only I don’t know how to fit it in yet. Also have no idea if u put baby in first or car seat first. Question after question. Can’t keep up with myself

Haha re car seats - you can do either but we tended to put DC1 in the car seat first as generally took it inside the house. So got DC ready in the house then out to the car - our car seat made a noise when you put it in right which was always reassuring. Here you can’t leave hospital unless you have put the baby in a car seat - even if you’re not driving home, crazy!!

We could also put our car seat on our pram with adaptors.

The whole thing is a minefield!

Hope you get everything sorted in time for Thursday

@swimchick1980 😂😂 how a baby meant to be sitting there.. head is so floppy.. I think it’s safer to hold baby rather than seats 🤦🏻‍♀️ But u can’t argue. And wtf is this rule about car seat? What if we don’t have a car 🤷🏻‍♀️ Still have to buy it so Midwifes happy? Brrr
And thank you..I hope it’s going to be ok 🙈
What about gifts? Fox? Is anyone buying anything for nurses?

@Aliona19 nope, not getting anything for nurses. So far I haven’t seen the same person twice, every time new person. Don’t see why I would get presents for someone I’ll see once... i actually haven’t ever considered it....
My DH will of course come with me, but I will send him home for few hours to feed our cat and maybe shower. It will make it much easier for us.
Surprised you had your meds and signed forms so far in advance... oh well, I will get all sorted tomorrow.
I practiced fitting car seat few times, maybe will try tomorrow few more times... and figure out baby seatbelts

@Fox23 I don’t know. I mean after c section we will stay some time in hospital with nurses helping us.. like maybe at least chocolate for them 🤷🏻‍♀️ Maybe I am just used to my country, it’s like a compulsory thing to get things even for gp if they looking after u.
My last consultant app was 3 weeks ago. And that’s same day as scan. When they realised my placenta is low, no point to wait, it’s a c section one way or another. So sorted all in the same day.
We decided to give god away for few days. I am worried she will howl if left day and night with just visits for a walk. Less stress.

Amazing. By the end of the week we will have two more babies on this thread. So excited for both of you @Fox23 and @Aliona19

Me and 4 others spent 15 mins in our station car park last week with a new Mum who couldn't work out how to convert the pram (which had been on wheels) into the car seat. She knew we had to remove these clips but none of us could do it. Meanwhile baby sat there patiently staring at us. It took all of us, several torches and a lot of effort to do it, but we got there in the end.

So maybe we should practice in advance!

Janedx40 😆😆 it’s nice to hear there r others who struggling 😁 we put pram base together the first time and then took us 2 days to fold it back 😅😅 we knew if someone clicked to put it up, we have to I click something to fold it down, but couldn’t figure out how 😂😂 rocket science

@Aliona19 - the car seat thing is crazy. Some people just borrow them if they don’t have a car - it makes no sense.

We have an isofix thing so don’t need to worry about seatbelts!!

I don’t think anything is expected for the nurses though nice to get something if you strike a bond with them. Not sure about your hospital and whether it makes a difference if you have a c section but here they can’t wait to get rid of you! I asked to stay 2 nights with DC1 to try to establish bf but they would have had me out after one night( or possibly even the same day) if I hadn’t asked.

Prams can be a nightmare - I once had to leave mine at a cafe and go back as I couldn’t get it down and was running late for an appointment 😂😂

swimchick1980 😂 I am terrified. I think I will be just staying home every day until baby is like 18 y old 🤣🤣 I see girls on the tube with prams and kids and they soo confident. And I am looking at my pram and thinning how the hell do you operate that thing 😱
In my country u stay in hospital at least 4 days after normal birth. Never mind c section. But then I don’t think I want to stay in the room full of other mums and kids crying 🤦🏻‍♀️

@aliona19 good luck getting everything sorted. The midwives and nurses would always appreciate chocolate but it's not needed. Sounds sensible leaving the dog with someone for a few days rather than worrying about it.
People do seem to get used to prams quite quickly even if they seem impossible. I think we will try and have a couple of practice goes before my due date though.

Don’t worry, you’ll be that confident Mum before you know it - or even if not, you’ll probably look like it to others! All of them have been where you are just now and have survived to tell the tale!

There are definitely pros and cons to being in hospital. The first night my DC was the cryer - I felt awful. Second night she wasn’t but someone else’s was , so once I felt a bit better re BF I was glad to get home!

Good luck aliona
My 4d scan I had at 30 weeks and paid £70 I got a disc with all the photos on and two printed ones. It’s good to see what they look like! I had a little peak at my 16 week gender scan in 4d and made her turn it off as I was freaked out as he was so small and looked like an alien 😂
With regards to getting nurses presents. No I’m not.
x