Fresh Start thread for pregnancy after miscarriage or loss

[BertieBotts]

I've lost count of what number we were on, sorry.

Also there seems to be another BFP after MC thread running, but it has all different people on it so I didn't know if we should crash theirs or just have two running at once...

@laney and @whiteonesugar I’m so sorry.

I’m so sorry to hear the bad news from Laney and white. I hope you and your other halves are looking after yourselves. It’s so shit.

@Laney79 and @whiteonesugar I'm so sorry to hear your news. Take care both of you.

Hi, just popping in to see how everyone is? Im now 20 weeks, have my scan on Friday. Getting the scanxiety! DH and I have got the day off so hopefully a nice lunch out afterwards and a bit of shopping.

Hey labmum, 20 weeks, amazing! Can totally see how you must be stressed about Friday but lovely to have a nice day planned together. Will be thinking of you! Have you bought much yet? I’m 16 weeks Wednesday, got midwife appointment tomorrow afternoon and next consultants one/scan 10 October. We’ve got so used to fortnightly scans I think we’ll probably buckle and book a private one before then.

@AnneLovesGilbert 16 weeks wow! That's brilliant! How are you feeling? Any little flutters yet? Its awful being thrown to the wind after regular scans. I'm feeling regular little thuds now which is nice. Have everything from DS so don't need much, just a new car seat base and I bought a sleepyhead second hand from my cousin. The house on the other hand needs loads doing so Ive got a big checklist of jobs that need doing before February!

Anne congrats on getting to 16 weeks! I’ve had my longest break without a scan now (5 weeks!) and it feels like forever when I’ve been having so many! Labmum 20 weeks is a great milestone, fingers crossed for a good scan on Friday. I’ve got my next lot of appointments Friday too- OGTT, midwife and growth scan/placental position check all on one morning. At least I’ll be busy! Lots of baby movement here now (27 weeks) but definitely less forceful than with DD at this stage- hopefully due to the anterior placenta.

Hey @Labmum @Paranormalbouquet & @AnneLovesGilbert so lovely to see you all so far along. 15+4 here today. Having a really hard time as it's a year ago today that dd was found to have died. I wish I could feel movements as I think I would feel a bit more positive today.
We are still on the 2 wk scan cycle, next one is next Tuesday at 16+4. Having a fasting blood glucose just to check if there are any signs of the gestational diabetes reoccurring and also a cervical length scan. We will be on the two week scans for the duration I think. I hope.

Oh Miami today must be very hard for you and your husband. Will you do something to mark her birthday? You will start feeling movements soon hopefully. I’m glad you are having scans every 2 weeks. Also glad they are checking to see if GDM has come back, everything to protect the placenta can only help. Cervical length scans I know all about with my history of course and I hate having them (as cervix is so short there’s generally a LOT of poking about) but am glad they do them all the same.

I’m a little anxious about my poor uterine artery Dopplers but reassured that I’m back to 4 weekly scanning from Friday, and they will increase it if things are deteriorating or growth is suboptimal.

labmum well done on getting to 20 - hope friday goes well.
miami sorry today has bad memories, but glad you are being well checked over this pregnancy.

Having had an easy pregnancy myself since that hiccup at 29 weeks and the overnight stay I seem to have been at hospital a lot with checks and scans. It's greta of course that they are looking after me so well. Anyway despite a bought of thrush and some other uti which i've just finished AB for all was ok at the last check up. Have another next Monday and then a scan and consultant appointment on 10th oct to check growth and fluid - hopefully no fluid lost. I'll be 34 weeks at that appointment so if all ok I'm thinking they'll let me cook baby until 39/40 weeks. I'm going to ask for ELCS too at that appointment due to last birth trauma and what has happened this time... So I'm 32 weeks tomorrow and suddenly it's coming along quite quickly!!

@Miami81 lots of love your way, I hope you're doing ok.

So exciting that so many of you are reaching the final stages, I can't wait to see all your lovely babies!

@Miami81 what a tough day it must be for you. Sending love.

Holding your hand miami xxxx

Hope you and DH can have a big cuddle tonight and remember your little girl with love and look forward hopefully to welcoming this baby into your lives. Sending you both loads of love tonight and every day.

Nothing yet labmum, expecting it could be a few more weeks with anterior placenta. When did you feel it first? Was it different this time?

I’m feeling really good thank you. After the utter shite of parts of the last few years I’m in good shape and feeling pretty ace. You know, in between heartburn, exhaustion, insomnia, cravings, irrational blubbing, mad dreams, forgetfulness and watching the hair on my face and forearms growing bushy But bp is low, iron is normal, energy levels alright, nails are strong, eating well and stress levels mostly under control.

Had such a lovely appointment, she was amazing. Heard the heartbeat which was unexpected and brilliant, we’re going to hold off on a private scan as we had such a boost from that today.

nocats I cant believe how quickly time has passed! Probably doesn’t feel that way to you especially given your scare. How are you feeling about everything? Hope you get a date for your ELCS and that you’re getting good support. Stay in there cooking baby nocats!

That sounds so uncomfortable para Always a balance between wanting them to check as thoroughly as possible without causing you discomfort and pain. How are you doing in yourself?

Anne I felt flutters st about 16 weeks with DD- was unusually early for a first timer but placenta was very high and posterior so I’d feel her low down. This time it was later and is still less consistent than first time, so in my opinion placental position makes a huge difference! Congratulations on hearing the heartbeat, such a lovely sound.

NoCats delighted it’s all going well now, hopefully baby stays out for a while.

I’m feeling ok, main issue is hip pain at night in particular but it’s manageable. I’m still quite anxious but I’m coping with it (with the help of some cbt techniques a friend with expertise in the field taught me). Heartburn comes and goes here too but that’s standard.

@Anne, I'm glad your appointment went well. Lovely to get that boost. I've not met my community midwife yet but above heard she doesn't do the Doppler at 16 weeks so glad I had a scan at the hospital instead. Seeing her soon for my whooping cough and I'm guessing maybe flu vaccinations. With DS I think I had an anterior placenta and felt him at 16weeks, similar time frame with this one too and I'm guessing anterior placenta again as my tummy visibly pulses. I think it's very baby position dependant, most of the early kicks I only felt round the sides or low down due to the placenta. This one is a stretcher rather than a kicker I think and I think I may have another chronic hiccuper! DS would get the hiccups at least 5 times a day before and after birth and was a very windy/sicky/colicky baby. I clearly remember him getting hiccups when I was in the transition phase of labour!

Glad you're doing well @paranormal and @nocats. Not long left for you both now! Exciting! Are you both all prepared? Doing any antenatal classes?

I haven’t done any preparation, think we’ve been in complete denial that we might have a baby at the end of it all! I don’t need that much anyway- we are in a tiny London property and desperate to avoid clutter. Will rent a bednest from nct (found it great last time), breastfeeding went well last time so hopefully will again. Have a baby bath/changing table/storage unit that was brilliant last time. Have travel system but need a new car seat (such a big age gap that the old one is now considered out of date). If scan goes ok on Friday DH will take the old baby clothes out of the attic and see what can be reused for a winter baby (DD was summer).

This baby is more of a stretcher too, often feel head on one side and feet on the other just pushing! Also rolls over so sometimes see little fists/elbows pushing through.

Oh and having elective section so not bothering with antenatal classes.

Hi. I’m losing my mind. Have been suffering with hyperemesis but Less sick today. Supposedly 11 weeks post ivf. Last scan last weds was good but my mind us doing horrid things. Next is the big scan next Friday but last time I had a mmc in that scan after seeing a hb at 10/40. I’m so scared history is going to repeat itself. (Also had two early mc)

bean handhold and a hug. They say sickness often lessens when the placenta is up and running, which it will be at 11 weeks. What other symptoms have you got?

That's good about your scan last week, can you bring it to mind, or look at the photo and picture your baby in there well and healthy and moving around?

I know exactly how you're feeling. Had a growing sense of mistrust as we'd normally have a scan today but now in a different clinic and I was a click away from spunking a lot of money on a private scan (which I'll probably now do next week after payday!) and then we heard the hb at the midwife and it all went away. Only when we get the reassurance it hasn't decided to crap out on us like the last handful do I realise how much fear I was bottling up.

The whole thing fucking sucks when you've had the highs in the past followed by the crashing awful lows and all the pain and awfulness that then follows.

All I can send you is hope and love x

PS would booking a private scan help?

The bednest looks awesome para! Do you use it from birth?

And can you recommend any tips for prepping for breastfeeding or is it a wait and see how it goes deal?

I'd forgotten about the belly pulsing labmum, is it the placenta? I was having a hot flush the other night and lying on the bed in just pants when I saw it moving with my pulse, so weird.

Not having done it before, I don't have a clue what first movements will feel like.

After the appointment yesterday and assuming it'll be a while before I feel movements, I came home very tempted to buy a doppler. Read a few things about them today and talked myself in and out of it several times, now not a clue whether it's a mad, risky, stupid thing to do, or if it'll get me through the stressy weeks between scans....

Bean pregnancy after loss is always so hard. If it’s in any way comforting I find symptoms have no correlation with my likelihood of miscarrying. Sickness often goes away at 10-11 weeks anyway. A positive scan at 10 weeks is very good and hopefully history won’t repeat itself. I don’t think the anxiety goes away, we just learn to deal with it. I don’t know how people cope with just 2 scans in a pregnancy to be honest, I’m on a constant scan countdown! Although less so since I’ve started feeling movements.

@anne I’m exhausted but I suspected that’s due to not really eating. Have vomited 4 times since posting so that’s back. Nothing else.
I don’t know if a scan would help or not. It would have been fine at 11 weeks last time but then it was dead just after 12 anyway.

Anne I think we cross posted earlier and missed your questions!

I loved the bednest, used it from birth and it was fantastic not having to get out of bed to feed after having an emergency section.

As regards the breastfeeding I think it's quite a lot of luck. I was lucky that DD was an enthusiastic feeder after the first few days. Feed every chance you get in the early days and if it hurts, get help with the latch straight away. And expect to feed constantly in the beginning. It's normal.

@beanhunter lots of love your way, I really hope this time is different for you. xxx

@AnneLovesGilbert I'd definitely watch some instructional videos on how to get a latch, feeding positions etc. I struggled last time and watching those really helped.