First Pregnancies with Nov/Dec Due dates :)

[Emma198]

New thread ladies, first one nearly full ☺

@shallen I'm suffering badly with pain in my back around my tailbone too!! My midwife is referring me to physio.. whenever that will be. For now I'm using a gym ball/pregnancy ball to sit on and roll my hips in circles. It seems to be helping me a lot! She also told me to use ice packs on the area not heat. Hope you feel better soon x

@KB07 thanks for the reply, I have a physio appointment on the 31st August!! Not long to wait then!
It's slightly better today and seems to loosen up if I don't stay sat about for too long.

My yoga instructor also recommended the cat and cow poses and a lot of hip circles on all 4s, very painful, but hopefully they begin to help.

If all that fails I have the number of an acupuncturist who helped a mate of mine who had the same problem! So may give her a try.

Hope you feel better soon.

No back pain here but I can't move my head/neck which is interesting! Very much hoping that tonight I do the reverse of whatever I managed to do in my sleep last night !

And today I cannot move. I'd kill for some diazepam 😭

Oh no! With your neck? Is your bump making you lie funny? I keep rolling on to my front in the night and the baby wakes me up kicking like mad.

I've got physio this afternoon for my sore back and legs - I'll let you know how it goes @Shallen! I waited a similar amount of time for this one, got referred about six weeks ago and when the appointment finally came through, it's a group session with other pregnant patients! So we'll see what it's like 😂 just lumping us all in together! Might end up more like group counselling about our aches and pains.

Have a good day everyone!

Yep, the neck! It's eased off whilst I've been at work and active but no doubt I'll be back at square one tomorrow!

I'm currently sat in the back of my husband's car (not even been able to drive today!) with the dog after he picked us up from work. I've been getting what I believe is a repeated booting from baby - it's quite consistent and has been in one place the whole time. So far I'm only really feeling movement at the sides of my uterus - I'm guessing that's normal?

Most of my kicks are around my belly button, but I feel them towards the back sometimes.

Physio today was odd - there were 3 of us there and rather than assessing us the physio just gave us loads of tips for stretches and exercises to do, and said that they work for the majority of pregnant ladies to stop the problem getting worse but if things continue getting worse we've got to ring up after 2 weeks and book a 1 2 1 appointment, that helps them get through more women more quickly and it will help the majority! Was nice to meet some other girls though and both are going to the aquanatal i'm planning on starting which is nice too!

@Emma198 that does sound odd, I would kind of expect them to actually look at your back! Never been to a physio before though so I could be wrong.
Like you say, good to meet other people though.
I'll see what mines like in a months time.... feel a bit like my leg may have come off by then!!

Just on the off chance..

Is there anyone out there with HR experience?

I have been off work for the past 6 weeks after my mum died quite suddenly... They messed up my pay and I got full pay last month and now nothing this month as they had overpaid me last month... I'm now worrying as I think the time with £0 pay will be my qualifying weeks for SMP...

I'd already decided I'd start back at work next week to try and get some routine but with this news I'm completely panicking that I'll not even get SMP now as my qualifying weeks I will have earnt less than SMP...

My head is spinning....

Were you entitled to full pay while you were off @EL332?

@Emma198 I thought i was but it seems perhaps I wasn't now... I think I need to speak to HR when I go back...

I just feel like I'm now going to miss out on May pay due to bereavement and it feels like a big old kick to my stomach 😔

Is it a big company you work for?
They should have made it very clear if you weren't entitled to pay while you off. When's your due date?

I wasn't told anything really, just to listen to the doctor and to take the time I needed... I didn't ask whether I'd be paid and if didn't think to look at my contract...

I work for the local authority so yes - it is a big company.

As far as I'm aware, if they're not going to pay you they should have given you the option of putting holidays in not just let you take time off then tell you after the event that you're not getting paid. Compassionate leave is totally down to Employer's discretion but the information should be available to you.

Where I work, we're advised to use discretion for each individual situation but I'd have to be clear with a member of staff how long I was willing to give them paid.

Can't believe they've just paid you nothing this month, that's awful.

When's your due date?

@Emma198 I may be able to ask for them to change it retrospectively to holiday pay perhaps?

Who knows... i've just not been practical at all... just focusing on getting through each day and not letting my grief let me forget about my growing baby...

I'm due on the 29th of November 💕

So your qualifying week is from 16 August then. Usually I think they take the two pay slips prior to this, so June and July. If July pay was 0 due to overpayment in June then that works out but you'll still need to check whether you should have been on full pay.

If they're taking July and August then they should be able to fix that on the system surely.

Speak to HR about firstly your pay and if the right procedure has been followed and second what they use for qualifying pay. It would definitely be worth retrospectively putting annual leave in if it will boost your maternity pay if they'll let you.

Be super careful to check it all before you go off and make sure they have it right.

What a shit thing to happen on top of everything else :( x

I can't see that a HR/payroll balls up would affect it? If it does they need to rectify it

Sorry pressed send too quickly... You've still been in their employment regardless of how much you have or haven't been paid.

Thanks @Emma198 and @Another for taking the time to reply... I just need to try and make sure that my average earnings in the qualifying weeks is as high as possible to make maternity leave as manageable as possible ... it's just added stress I don't need... and I've now been awake since 4am worrying about it all...

It is a worry isn't it. Have you got the number for HR? Maybe ring them today even though you're not back so you can straighten it all out in your head before weekend.

I would challenge the fact that they haven't paid you as far as you're comfortable to as well, surely if they overpaid you they should have let you know formally and agreed to take it back bit by bit rather than leave you without a salary for a month. It's their error afterall.

ACAS provide free advice over the phone, maybe give them a ring if you're not happy with what HR tell you 0300 123 1100 xx

I'm panicking now too because I've had some absence in the past few weeks. If my due date is 8th November, does anyone know when my qualifying period would be, my work place is very hard to get information from and I'm so lost with all this stuff.

Qualifying period is the 15th week before your due date and my work take the two full pay periods before then @dw23 is your absence unpaid?

@EL332 was thinking, you said you saw your doctor, can you go back and get a backdated sick note? Doctor can issue one if they saw you at the beginning. Xx

Hi all! I'm new to this site :) currently 19 weeks+5 days, 1st baby (girl) due 16th December! Just saw a previous post about painful coccyx and can completely relate- not fun, especially when dragged out to places with uncomfy seating! Hope you are all well and not suffering too much in this crazy heat :)

Hi @Marie - welcome! How exciting for you.

Are you doing anything in particular to help with your pain?

@Emma198 I had a sick note for the time but was only paid SSP - they then deducted the SSP as per of reclaiming the overpayment from last month.

I've spent some time writing it all out and looking at how much it could affect my maternity pay...

It's all so bloody complicated as my due date is also a 4 days short of me qualifying for Occupational Maternity pay so depending on what they decide about the qualifying weeks and whether there will be any lenience on the date for OMP I'll either end up with an average of £589 or £1027 a month mat leave...

It's all so stressful - I think I'm going to wait until i have my MATB 1 form and then discuss it all with my manager and possibly arrange a meeting with HR...

I don't think all this stress can be doing the baby any good 😔