Posifrickinspring thread for PG after MC!

[BertieBotts]

If we can't be positive about the weather what can we be?

Welcome posters new and old.

limp welcome, i also try not to post too much on my 'normal' november group as i don't want to freak anyone out, and theres little chance of doing that on this very supportive thread.

blue wahhoooo for the magic 24 week mark. its funny how it just completely D R A G S at the beginning, like time is actually standing still! And then it must just race by once you get further along.

Oh so many lovely updates this morning (which is nice given that I'm back into work today after having the week off and have the cold from hell).

Have my dating scan Friday morning and if that's okay we'll be announcing to other family members on Sunday by the looks of it. Anyone else wanna go in my place? No?

I'm also really not sure about doing a FB announcement or something like that. I never got to do that before and seeing everyone else do it when I had my MCs seemed so unfair and cruel. It's a bit stupid though isn't it? I really want to celebrate the good news but it surely comes across as a bit condescending from before and given that I still have people hidden due to pg announcements/updates on their babies because that's still tough...

Eurgh. I just want what everyone else was able to do so freely

unicorns you should totally do the facebook update if you want to. A friend of mine who'd had 6 miscarriages before finally getting successfully pregnant made the most sympathetic and touching announcement where she acknowledged her losses, and that others could find the announcement hard but she wanted to share the good news. It was touching and beautiful and at no point like the typical show off style announcements that can wind me up/upset me....

Unicorn, I didn't do a Facebook announcement. I've told lots of people but Facebook is just too public for me to announce on if things were to go wrong. I've added pictures and mentioned my pregnancy on Instagram but I don't have half as many followers on my Instagram account as I do Facebook.

@UnicornsandRainbows1 we waited til nearly 21 weeks on FB. One of the reasons was because we routinely don't tell parents at school until after 20 weeks. However, regardless of that, we didn't feel ready to share our news on FB before then. I was very open about my MMC on FB and received loads of (much needed) support. Even so, I really was umm-ing and ahh-ing about whether to share this time at all, for fear of tempting fate. I'm glad I did now, as it was nice to share good news this time, although I will admit it took a lot of wrangling with my anxiety to do so! I rarely post about anything pregnancy related though, as I know how hard it is for those going through MC, infertility etc to see pregnancy posts, and I still feel too anxious to share confidently anyway. I would say if you and your other half feel ready after your 12 week scan, go for it.

Thanks @TheGrumpySquirrel! Got a bit of a sore arm now, but it was fine. I'll be obsessing about movements later!

Thank you all.

The letting people know is a bit of a hot topic - we are getting married in 5 weeks, by then I will be a sniff off 12 weeks. If this one sticks, which is not guaranteed. SO sick of not being able to say 'when' without adding 'if'.

The not drinking at hen / reception will be a massive giveaway, and I am kind of assuming I will be showing a bit in my dress (diastasis recti never quite went from my DD) so will probably end up admitting it to 80 odd people. Or those rude enough to ask anyway :)

Great news intelligent!

I'm getting my knickers in a major twist here. I've got my 20 week scan and after having decided that my primary concern is that there won't be enough amniotic fluid fluid I've now had some really watery discharge this afternoon. Apologies for the TMI. So now I'm worrying that my waters have gone and don't know what to do. I changed my undies just over half an hour ago and nothing more since then. I'm pretty sure I've had really watery discharge like this earlier on but not for a while.

running i hope you've not had any more discharge. When is your 20 week scan?

Went to see my GP today and although she said she couldn't get me an early scan (i'm 6+2) she said i could ring EPU and ask. I have no reason to believe it wont be ok because I've had no bleeding/spotting or anything. It's just the worry from the mmc last time when nothing seemed wrong either. Anyone had any experience of ringing epu and wanting to be scanned just because they'd had a mc before? I guess I'd like one around 8/9 weeks when I think i must have lost the last one before. Or should I talk to my midwife about it? I'm just waiting on my appointment with them....

keepon sorry you're feeling so worried. If it helps at all, I've found that I've been getting a huge amount of very watery discharge (soaks my knickers as if I'd wet them) for a while - I'm not sure how long, but at least a few weeks so maybe 21/22 weeks, possibly earlier. It's incredibly annoying - I hate the feeling of wearing a pantyliner (I never use sanitary pads if I can help it) but this is so much it gets onto my thighs (sorry if TMI). It does dry white, so I'm pretty certain that it is just very thin discharge, and I think it's v normal, even though I didn't get it earlier in pregnancy. When is your scan?

Nocats I think this will massively depend on your area - where I live they won't do a scan without bleeding/bad cramps unless you've had three previous MC, but I know in some places they do. It's definitely worth asking, but I'd be prepared for the disappointment of them saying no - would you be able to afford a private scan, if they do say no and it's something you really want? I did get two NHS early scans because of my three previous MC but I still ended up paying for two private ones too at moments of high anxiety and for me it was worth the money - I know that different people feel very differently about how reassuring/helpful scans are, though. For me they helped hugely, and I'm still trying to get my head around the idea that all being well we won't actually see him again until he's born!

@NoCatsHere i have been able to get early scan on nhs just by ringing epu directly due to early losses - its tomor and im already panicking it isnt going to be good news again. Im in NI though

Scan is at 3.30 and then have antenatal clinic appointment afterwards. I'm going to leave work in about an hour. No point going home earlier because DH and I will whip each other into a frenzy!

DH made me ring the maternity assessment helpine yesterday in the end. The midwife was reassuring and I haven't had any since so I think it probably was just discharge.

nocats where I am you have to have 2 MCs before you get reassurance scans through EPU. You can get pretty reasonably priced private scans most places these days I think if that would be an option for you?

Thanks so much lisa and keeping for your replies. I think I'll ring EPU maybe in a week or so. The thing is if they offer me one now, I know I'll want another in 2 weeks as well. I can afford a private one, it was just such a bad experience last time. Maybe I'll search on line for a different place. I can't wait to 12 weeks, I think I'll definitely get one about 9/10 weeks to check, but like you say Lisa, I'll be prepared for EPU to refuse.

keeping good luck for yours tomorrow. how many weeks will you be?
keeponrunning thanks, i've had two, a mc at 7 and a mmc at 10 so will see if i qualify in my epu. good luck for yours later on today.

Thanks @NoCatsHere i should be 7weeks tomo fingers crossed.

Here’s another positive one for you. 12 week scan after three miscarriages and an ectopic. All looking normal.

Aw what wonderful news @aetw, you certainly deserve it!

Great news aetw!

All was good with my scan thank goodness. When she found out I was a Dr she gave us some freebie 3D pics. Must be the only perk of working for the NHS! Next goal, 24 weeks.

Lisa and keeping I'm 20 weeks now and the discharge is unreal. Where does it even come from! Cervix working overtime to keep conditions optimal in that mucus plug 👍🏼 I have heard it's very normal at this stage.

@Flatwhite32 still feeling good post vaccine? I'm getting nervous for mine - and for my anomaly scan which is a week tomorrow 😱

NoCats our epu offered after last m/c and said to call next time. I'm now 6.5 weeks again with no period in the middle and will be having a third scan next week to check viability. They did say that would be it til 11 weeks but will try to scan if I'm panicking, although that might be coz I was so cross rmc is closed while the consultant is away for 3 months.

Freaked the fuck out last night when I had the tiniest bit of brownish discharge. Barely slept. Didn’t dare wake DH up to tell him as he’s got a godawful stressful day today.

Good news is that I took another FRER this morning (13dpo) and it looks nice and strong and darker than 48 hours ago. But dios mio, the stress. Not helped by the fact that I’m at the end of a course of penicillin which my rational brain knows is giving me diarrhoea and tummy cramps (and possibly the brown spotting was down to a particular forceful poo - sorry) but I often get that before a period and also got before my MC so I’m basically worrying all day. Aaaaargh.

I am (luckily) not an anxious person by nature but that means I basically have no coping strategies for this sort of thing.

It’s good to vent though. Aaaargh.

Hugs, MrsMoggins, the anxiety is so draining. My only way is to assume the worst to an extent. It's miserable but otherwise I'm just obsessing 24/7. I think there's a touch of whistling past the graveyard iykwim.

@TheGrumpySquirrel, I had a sore arm yesterday and felt a little 'off' in the morning when I woke up, which the nurse said could happen. However, that wore off as the day went on, and my arm feels less sore today. It feels like a bad bruise. Really not too bad at all thankfully!

Best of luck with your 20 week scan. I vomited with nerves on the day of mine! The anxiety never fades does it?!