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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Pregnant women smoking

135 replies

Nat291 · 31/10/2017 01:13

I hate hate hate swing pregnant women smoke, I literally feel like screaming you selfish twat to them!!!!

I smoked a lot for 10 years and when we started trying for a baby stopped straight away, I fell pregnant straight away and have touched a cig since, currently 37 weeks, I don't even like to be near people that smoke.

Do these silly women not realise it could damage there unborn child!! Yes, in the old days everyone smoked while pregnant but now there is proof it harms a baby why would you even bother.

I saw a women in labour outside the hospital last week smoking a ciggy, takes all my strength not to say something.

Rant over 😂😂

OP posts:
Original poster
Nat291 · 31/10/2017 01:14

I meant haven't touched a cig 😂😂 sorry spelling is shocking.

OP posts:
BastardGoDarkly · 31/10/2017 01:19

Yes they realise, no, they don't want to stop, up to them.

You need to calm down, stress isn't good for babies either.

ZaphodBeeblerox · 31/10/2017 01:22

Good for you.

How do you know these women are pregnant with a live baby? The last time we had this ranty thread many women (including myself) talked about our experiences where we ostensibly looked pregnant but there was no alive baby to be harmed by our smoking. We all mostly got ignored by the judgemental lot keen to pour such vitriol on smokers.

Despite so much research showing that nicotine is a lot more addictive than any other drug people consume, breaking the habit is hard and many pregnant women have immensely stressful and difficult circumstances.

Rhynswynd · 31/10/2017 01:24

What Zaphod said.
Mind your own business and do what is best for you and your baby.

Rhynswynd · 31/10/2017 01:24

What Zaphod said.
Mind your own business and do what is best for you and your baby.

Atenco · 31/10/2017 01:37

It is not ideal, but why do you get your knickers in a twist?

Congratulations on your pregnancy and giving up smoking, but bear in mind that it is impossible to be a perfect mother, we are all good at some things and lousy at others. Some mothers who are perfect in other ways feed their children a constant diet of processed foods. Not everyone can breastfeed and a lot of children are growing up where there is a huge amount of air pollution. In this sea of chemical contamination, it is better not to smoke as well, but the difference it makes is minimal.

OkPedro · 31/10/2017 01:50

You're an amazing person op
I think you should shout in the faces of any pregnant women you meet especially if they're eating a mcds, having a glass of wine or eating unpasteurised cheese. What a fantastic person you are, educating the unwashed Halloween Angry
Mind your own business

Original poster
Nat291 · 31/10/2017 03:30

@ZaphodBeeblerox do you know I've never actually thought of that and I'm really sorry I've been so narrow minded!!

@OkPedro I feel that smoking is the worst thing you can do, I've never said anything to people like that I said it annoys me.

I have a genetic disorder and am very lucky to have fallen pregnant and carried my child to ill term! Maybe this is why I feel so strongly about this, that pregnancy is such a blessing as a lot of women cannot get pregnant and felt like women smoking takes the piss.

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 31/10/2017 03:35

I work with teenage mums who have struggled with substances, homelessness, abuse and trauma. Some of them have come off the street, out of abusive relationships and off crack, meth and heroin to give their babies the best chance. A couple of them still, occasionally, smoke.

When you live their life and do better; you get to judge. Of course if you lived their life, you wouldn’t judge. I’m always impressed by them.

Simmy10 · 31/10/2017 03:38

I agree with you OP! I feel that by smoking, the smokers are putting their own needs before the needs of their unborn child. I think it's selfish.

And to everybody telling OP to mind her own business - she is entitled to have an opinion!

Original poster
Nat291 · 31/10/2017 03:51

@MrsTerryPratchett but you don't know what I've been through in my life, what I went through to get pregnant and what I'm going through the whole pregnancy. And I still will not smoke a cigarette.

Yes, I understand some people need it as a coping mechanism, everyone has stuff going on some worse than others but I just feel in my opinion that what's the point, it's 9 months out of a persons life to give there unborn child a start! If they want to carry on after that crack on!!

As I mentioned thought as someone above I've never thought before with regards to women that look pregnant but the baby unfortunately no longer live so that has made me think I shouldn't be so judgemental.

As i said I've never said anything to a women and never would, I get angry about it but would never shout at somebody! I'm just expressing my opinion.

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 31/10/2017 03:54

I don’t know. If you were a prostituted, homeless, addicted teenager when you got pregnant, I apologize. Otherwise, I don’t.

Want2bSupermum · 31/10/2017 04:01

I have terrible nausea from being around cigarette smoke after my second pregnancy. It just wasn't something I could tolerate while pregnant and I felt like a fraud complaining because I used to smoke myself.

Smoking while pregnant isn't great but smoking with the baby in your arms I just don't get. I'd be terrified of accidentally burning a toddler who bumps into a lit cigarette being held. I've also seen parents holding their very small child with a cigarette in the other hand.

ZaphodBeeblerox · 31/10/2017 05:23

Thank you for being gracious. I quit smoking years ago - the only one I’ve had in 4-5 years was a day postpartum after a tragic outcome.

I’m with you in thinking pregnancy is a blessing. And I feel sad / angry / emotional when people discuss terminations for (what to me seem like) frivolous reasons, or complain about newborns or sleep, or talk about missing their pre baby life etc etc.

I’m almost at term now and all I do is worry about this baby and I’ll do anything to keep this LO safe. But that’s based on my story and my experiences.

I’ve thankfully never experienced hunger or food insecurity for example, so I’ll sound like a right twat if I complain about “too many veg I didn’t like in my organic farmers box” or some shite right? Everyone’s perspective of what is acceptable / what is terrible behaviour etc is so coloured by their personal story I find it hard to get judgemental about other people’s lives. Sad, yes.. and feeling privately like I wouldn’t make the same choices as them, yes, but not angry or hating them.

Warhammerwidow89 · 31/10/2017 06:39

Is it your body? No.
Is it your baby? No.

Mind your damn business and get your feeling of superiority elsewhere.

Ecclesiastes · 31/10/2017 06:47

Pregnant women who smoke provide a vivid real life demonstration that, in our society - at least for the time being - women enjoy bodily autonomy. You really wouldn't want it any other way.

TheCatsMother99 · 31/10/2017 07:01

Brave move, OP, these threads never go down well.

Original poster
Nat291 · 31/10/2017 07:46

It's not a feeling of superiority I'm wanting! And if it doesn't go down well I'm really not fussed!

I'm voicing my opinions which is after all what mumsnet is about, and from comments I have a different perspective on things. I still think it's wrong but realise I don't really know the full story.

As I said you don't know my back ground and you don't know what I'm going through, but my number one priority is this baby and having a cig is the last thing I myself would do.

I've not said someone is a bad mother for smoking or a bad person, I just feel in my opinion on some occasions it's very selfish, I personally know people who's parents have smoked and the children have had problems because of this so maybe this is another reason why I feel this way.

OP posts:
Ilovechocolate111 · 31/10/2017 08:13

It's down to the person to stop smoking. Sometimes it's hard.! Sometimes there going through to much stress to stop. If you dont like pregnant women smoking look away. It's there baby and there life.
Sometime you just have to respect there wishes..!
I'm tell you now(call me evil or what ever you want) I smoked with my first. He was born absolutely fine..
Most women in the 60's or 70's smoked when they where pregnant and most of them live longer than..
It's their life....

Atenco · 31/10/2017 12:24

I personally know people who's parents have smoked and the children have had problems because of this

I'm not being smart, what problems did these people have because their parents smoked?

My mother was virtually a chain-smoker back in the day when everyone smoked and none of us, her three elderly offspring, has any resulting health problems.

thingymaboob · 31/10/2017 12:39

@Nat291 I completely agree with you. I work in a hospital with a maternity unit and there are always pregnant women smoking outside. It's disgraceful and disgusting.

RaininSummer · 31/10/2017 12:43

I think it is pretty bad if a pregnant woman smokes. The stuff is poison and if you are pregnant you do have to think of the baby. Also if you don't stop when pregnant then you probably wont stop at all and it is proven that being around, even secondary smoke, is harmful.

Mrskeats · 31/10/2017 12:46

I love how the comparison with cheese or the odd glass of wine is trotted out on these threads even though there is clearly no comparison.
Smoking whilst pregnant is the height of selfishness and I hate seeing it.

welshweasel · 31/10/2017 12:48

In an ideal world, no one would smoke whilst pregnant. Or take drugs, have a mess that perfect diet, be overweight, be underweight or any other things. But the world is not perfect and I suspect many of those who judge pregnant smokers have absolutely no concept of just how hard life can be for some of these mothers. Carry on living in your sheltered parallel universe but keep your judgement to yourself.

Mrskeats · 31/10/2017 12:51

I don’t live in a sheltered parallel universe whatever the hell that means. I work with children and young people and know very well how tough things can be.
I don’t intend to keep my opinions to myself as last time I checked we have free speech around here.

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