Staying posifrickentive- Thread 16 for ladies pg after mc

[oliversmummy26]

Starting a new thread for us ladies...

Hello all, Stealth so sorry to read your news, hope you've got lots of love and support round you.

Mammabear, excellent scan picture, double congratulations.

Congratulations to Miami too, got to love a wave!

I've been hiding and lurking for the last week as have been nervously awaiting my Harmony test results, couldn't even put into words how scared I was so basvially just watched rubbish telly and played candy crush incessantly. I am very pleased to report all is well, low risk for everything and also had a very detailed scan, I have seen two arms, two legs, all 4 chambers of the heart, nasal bone, blood flowing through the umbilical cord, a brain, stomach, little fingers and finally a tongue being poked out at us. My head is absolute mush. Amazing. Oh and we are having a boy, I was convinced I knew this little one was a boy in the same way I knew was the little one I lost was a girl last year. Emotional doesn't cover it.

Welcome to all the newcomers, you'll be in excellent company here.

Amazing @MonkeyPoozzled76 ! 😄 hilarious about the 😛 haha Did you have a private scan with 3D/4d then?

Oh god just realised that was really insensitive photo placement within my text, sorry Stealth.

Bikerchick, it was part of the package with the Harmony at the private clinic I'd chosen. I'm 40 so knew I'd be high risk so wanted the NIPT before the nhs 12 weeks. I can't recommend it enough, the Doc also did bloods as per NHS and worked out what ratio of risk I would have been given down the NHS route. I'd have been told a 1:68 chance of downs mainly due to my age and I'd have been terrified. She advised as the Harmony is only 99% she does the full scan to check everything for extra peace of mind. To be honest the 4d pics were odd, little one looked like ET and it freaked DH right out.

Thanks @MonkeyPoozzled76. There is a private clinic near me that seems quite thorough (the way you describe) for £399. Was umming and ahing as my hospital does send off bloods for DNA (i.e. harmony) for free but only if the initial combined test shows high risk. But I thought that perhaps it was worth doing the private tests in tandem since I won't get my NHS results for a couple of weeks (when I'll be 14+) so that I find out sooner / have a second opinion, but it's a fair amount to shell out only to repeat tests that the NHS are supposedly already doing...

mammabear I'm so glad everything was good--and what a cool scan, like a yin-yang!
Monkey that is awesome
Sweetyboo I know it was a few days ago, but you were worried about symptoms coming and going. I've had morning sickness consistently for the past week and a half, but every few days I seem to get a break from it for a day. Today was one of those days so naturally I panicked but I'm sure I'll be back to feeling low-level hungover tomorrow...anyway just wanted to say that I know the feeling of terror when you wake up with no morning sickness, but I hope you have been reassured! X

Bickerchick if you can have the Harmony on the NHS that sounds brilliant, I checked with my trust and couldn't so knew I'd just be offered CVS or Amnio after high risk which for me was pretty inevitable. Just a question of being able to take the risk ratio's with a pinch of salt while you wait if you can. If it helps I would have been 1:68 initially, 1:1360 after a good scan (nasal bone, low nuchal, good heart) then down to 1:10000 after the NIPT. The results were back in 4 working days although I didn't know until today so waited just over a week, but I can completely understand wanting to know as early as possible. My ratios for T18 and 13 were much better but still would have frightened me as either of those would be incompatible with life so knowing early for these was vital for me. A positive for Downs and I'd have wanted to wait and see how seriously the baby was affected before making and decisions. It's a lot of thinking and it was bloody scary but the relief is lovely, although I'm sure I'll be stressing again soon enough.

Just wanted to add for those of you worried about lack of symptoms, I've had practically none this time round, and no sickness at all. I had sore boobs for about a week and the odd bit of heartburn. My only constant companions have been tiredness and endless weeing.

I got myself into a tizzy today as I had read that by the beginning of the 2nd trimester I should have a linea nigra. Which I don't! Cue frantic googling, Wikipedia massively reassured me saying women who are very pale tend not to get this. I'm very very pale with ginger hair so it looks likely it may not happen for me!

So so so many things to worry about!

Sock I'm pale and whilst not a redhead my skin is that tone; last time I got my LN at 24w, it was gorgeous and then went all wide and orangey (?) at 38w! Needless to say it vanished soon after DD was born.

20w scan tomorrow (at 19w). This time I am a swan, gliding excitedly towards the sonographers table. I have a distant scared and dready feeling but overall I'm positive. I have to hang onto that. What's the alternative; feeling only comfort in fear?

Big hugs monkey, you must be totally relieved.

Thank you ladies 😁 we're over the moon. Although the reality of twins is starting to sink in and DH has spent all evening googling best 7 seater cars and garage conversions 😂

Monkey what a fantastic scan, hello to your little baby boy!! Massive congratulations xx

Sock I never got a LN!! Bizarre that somewhere says you "should" have it by the second trimester surely everyone is different! I'm not particularly pale just totally average white skinned, tan in the sun, brown eyes. And zero sign of one!

Haz a reading challenge sounds like a fantastic idea. I'm ashamed to say I distracted myself with candy crush last night rather than getting round to a new book - I can't remember the last time I read one actually which is pretty poor show for an English lit graduate 😳

Hope everyone's doing ok symptoms wise. I'm managing to stave off the sickness by eating every 2 hours but I already feel like an absolute whale! I'm also completely exhausted, feel like I'm constantly running off 2 hours sleep!

Sock I meant with previous pregnancy by the way - only 7 weeks in this one!

Thanks @MonkeyPoozzled76 🙂 my husband thinks we should wait for the NHS results too, and to go private only if they decide I'm not definitively high risk enough for them to fund the DNA test through the NHS. Like you, we would want to be informed.

@TheLegendOfBeans Good luck for tomorrow! That's going to be so exciting!!

@mammabear4 My husband is busy researching larger cars too 😂

Thank you for the replies everyone. I think the people who write pregnancy apps need to make things more clear e.g you MAY notice a linea nigra or SOME WOMEN notice their nipples have darkened.

Instead of saying you will have noticed... It's not helpful to people who suffer with anxiety!

@sock I completely agree, it's almost dangerous to set expectations about what symptoms should appear when given we know that EVERY pregnancy is different. I keep worrying to my BFF (who is 30 weeks pregnant with her first and has no history of miscarriage) that I don't have X symptom or Y symptom and she's like "that's GREAT, you should be PLEASED, it's HORRIBLE!" but because of my MMC I'm desperate for any physical evidence that I'm still pregnant! I keep poking at my boobs to make sure they're still sore!

Good luck today Beans.....glide through that door!

Hope today goes well Legend!

@peachgreen totally know what you mean - me too! Have to keep reminding myself that statistics are on our side x

Today has been an absolute nerve shredder culminating in DD literally windmilling her lunch all over the dining table, chairs, herself, walls, carpet, French doors, my dress, everyfuckinwhere.

As well as previous stupid nonsense dealt with earlier I'm hoping this will lead to a happy and good outcome at 2pm.

Knackered already.

@MonkeyPoozzled76

Just had my combined screening test results - apparently it's a very good; a "negative" result (although I thought they went on a risk scale rather than positive/negative) which means, if the tests were accurate, then LB is low risk for Downs (1:18000), Edwards (1:10000) and Patau (1:11000) based on my blood hormones, the NT measurement (1.6mm), and my age (36).

I am happy but of course now I'm also worried about the accuracy of the combined test vs the Harmony (DNA). As I'm not high risk my hospital won't fund Harmony through the NHS, but I don't know if it's OTT to pay for a private screen (£400+) when the odds from the combined screening sound so good. But it would be another opportunity to check on Little Biker (it would be the full shebang again, with scan etc) so I'm really torn. Shouldn't be stressed yet I am... 

20w scan passed without a hitch

BOOM! Another milestone achieved 👍

Congratulations beans 😄

I'm struggling. My 'reassurance' scan for what would be 10 weeks according to dates (before I was put back 8 days) isn't until next Tuesday. That's ages away. I can't settle into the idea that I'm pregnant. And my c-section scar is bothering me (really don't want it to be infected!). Oh, and I managed to splatter hot oil all up my left arm the other day too. I'm a mess quite frankly and DH is working 3pm-3am the next three days!!!

Whoop whoop beans, brilliant news

Bickerchick those results sound excellent! The best outcome for all 3 T's given on the Harmony test would be 1:10000 and you've met or exceeded all of those with a really low NT measurement too. I can completely understand wanting more reassurance (I'd agree to any non invasive test on offer to be honest!) but I don't think the Harmory test will better those results. Would speaking to the private clinic to see if they thought Harmony was needed given your good results be useful?

I think no matter what we are told, or what milestones we reach and reassurance we get, there is always the next thing to worry about on the horizon. I'm guessing it'll continue like this till our kids are in their 40's and I'm old and grey.

Ahh Donna sounds like you need chocolate and a comfy sofa. Possibly a good book as suggested up thread or perhaps rubbish telly if DH is out at work?

On a lighter note MIL has taken us out for a congratulatory lunch today, offered to buy a cot, sign me up for NCT and presented us with a Baby Name Book. I was going to kindly ask her to hold her horses a little bit as it's all still a bit early for all that. She then went on to explain (loudly in a busy cafe) she'd also selected and paid for her bloody funeral!! I've no idea how those thought processes met!

Thanks @MonkeyPoozzled76 That helps put some perspective on it. I'll call the private clinic and have a quick chat with them.

Your MIL sounds just like both my PIL! Kooky but ultimately well-meaning, I'm sure 😄

@MonkeyPoozzled76 - I foolishly left a big tub of chocolate at work. There is no chocolate. I shall have spaghetti on toast for my tea though. I need a good slap quite frankly, my friend's relationship has been exploded by her cheating partner and I'm wallowing in anxiety.

Haha Monkey it sounds like your MIL jumps the gun on all of life's milestones! My PIL are the opposite, in that they are so superstitious they won't have anything for any baby in the house until after it is born--yes, including their own firstborn (my DH)! FIL had to run out the night he was born and buy literally babygrows and bottles and everything as they had nothing but the hospital blanket in which to wrap him! Of course in those days MIL had 10 days in a maternity home before coming to the house, so they were sorted by that time, but still...