Bleeding, waiting for repeat scans, worried about viability etc – let’s unite in limbo!

[MrsMcJnr]

Ladies, I know there are quite a few of us in this category and I am conscious that although the lovely ladies on here are supporting us on every thread we post on, I am worried that we are spoiling their own pregnancy experience by worrying so I thought I?d set this up for those who really don?t know if things are going one way or the other. Thought it might help us to get through the days/weeks until we do know what?s going on.

For those who don?t know me (though I?m a prolific poster ) here?s me in a nutshell: Based on LMP I?m 9+4 weeks (9+1 based on suspected OV). First pregnancy (though had early termination 10 years ago). TTC for 8 cycles to get here. Got BFP 26/1. Some spotting that week so sent to EPU on 23/1 for early scan. Gestational sac seen by external scan and yolk also seen by internal scan. Measured only 11.4mm though so only 5+5/6 weeks. Was rescheduled for scan 7/3 to see if things had changed. Given 50/50 chance. Started heavy bleeding 1/3. Had emergency scan 2/3. Told sac still there and has grown. Repeat scan scheduled for 9/3. In the meantime, more heavy bleeding, clots, cramps and much anguish.

I just wish I knew what was going on! Please join me.

MrsMcJnr - I can't tell you how sorry I am. Checked earlier to see if you were back, I'm gutted for you and amazed to see you are still caring about others despite this horrible loss.

It is reassuring to hear about the ovaries and womb looking healthy and normal, I know you won't this this today or even for a few weeks, but I have remembered this and taken comfort in it from my last scan. Helps to feel positive about trying again.
Best wishes Mrs
STx

Whoops - I don't know what to say, it must be terrible just waiting for this to be over. I hope you are able to cope this weekend and get throught it in front of your children. Hope you are OK.

MrsMcJnr, I do not know what to say. I am so very sorry about your loss. At the same time I am very happy that you can TTC immidiately and don't have to wait for surgeries or a natural mc etc. At least it's over. (I guess I am speaking as much to myself as to you: I would much prefer it to be over with than to drag it out IYKWIM. I hope this is not insensitive.)
You sounds very strong, but there is no doubt you will have your ups and downs. And: we will be here for you -- I really mean it! Now, I do not want to invoke a painful memory but I do not get it: the sac had grown by Monday but was gone one Wednesday (I assume once the bleeding stops everything was passed). So, did it happen then between Monday and Wednesday?

My bleedings has stopped completely now, but my hormones are going up. Have now thick dark lines on the tests. Now it could mean that everything is okay and it was implantation bleeding (best case) or that I lost the embryo and the placenta continuous to grow and I have another missed mc (absolute worst case). Since I haven't had quantitive bloods done, I do not know if my hormone increase is normal or below normal, so I just do not know. If it is missed mc I would try to mc naturally which could be literally months from now. This is definitely the scariest for me.

mrsmc so sorry i really am, only thing i can say is i started straight away that same month, i didnt want to dwell on it!, ans i was told i was super fertile just after a m/c, some who lost same time as me did get pg straight away too, but took me two more months which after trying two years with no luck makes you wounder.

but you do what ever you feel happy with. (((hugs)))((hugs))

Hi Mrsmcjnr- I have posted on the October thread, but just wanted to add that I think you are brilliant and if you want to TTC straight away then you GO GIRL!!! My sister and I fell PG together with first babies, but sadly she had a miscarriage at 9 wks. However, she and DP got back to TTC again, and we were able to be PG together for 3 months! My DS is 5.5 months older than hers, and they are the best of mates! I look forward to congratulating you on your next BFP soon. xxxxxxxxxxxx
(I am crying now!)

Message withdrawn

Thanks Strangetown, I do see a positive in the ovaries and womb being clear, sounds crazy but I feel it puts me a step ahead of where I was when I was TTC before because I now know that both DH and I can conceive and conceive together and that all my equipment is working. DH and I have said that we?ll take some positives out of this and treat it as a lifestyle wake up call. We are both going to put effort into losing some weight and getting fitter and celebrating the fact that we have each other, we are stronger than before and no way will anything ever separate us. How are you doing now? Are you trying again? This is the saddest thing that has ever happened to me and I?m full of admiration for those of you who have got through the misfortune to go through this more than once.

Glimmer ? thank you hon, it?s so nice to know you care I know what you mean about the relief of it being over, sorry to say that when I know so many of you are still in limbo but if it had to end this way, I am so glad it was a complete ending, a conclusive ending and I didn?t have to make any choices.

Happy to explain hon, 2 weeks ago, 27/2 (Fri) I was told there was a sac and a yolk but the size was 1 1/2/2 wks too small for my dates and they couldn?t see anymore but wouldn?t expect to as I was only measuring 5+5/6 weeks instead of 7+5/8 weeks. I was meant to go back on Weds 7/3 to see if the sac had grown but in the meantime, I got bleeding on 1/3 and so went back last Friday 2/3 instead. That was when I was told that in spite of the bleed, the sac was still there and had grown but they couldn?t see anymore. I had a lot more bleeding after the scan which must have been when I lost the baby ? sometime between Friday afternoon and Tuesday night I think which is when the red bleeding and pains stopped. Then today, there is nothing left.

Great news about the bleeding stopping and the hormones going up Remind me again how far along you are? Hang in there hon, no blood is good news. Sorry for the fuzzy brain, when?s your scan again?

Thanks for the advice Trace, I do remember you saying that some say you are
super fertile just after a m/c, I guess it?s like having a proper spring clean in some ways. Fingers crossed.

Honeyapple ? thank you so much for your support, I?ll be looking for your congratulations soon I hope Please don?t cry

Thanks Firststar ? in some ways, I don?t want to know my dates next pregnancy, happy to rely on scan diagnosis after this experience! Don?t think I?ll buy any tests either, I?ll let me boobies tell me next time!

Oh MrsMcJnr, I'm so sorry you didn't get outcome one. You are a totally amazing lady,to be looking at the positive even through this trauma is such a testement to your character. I'm really happy you don't have to go through D&C and that you can start trying again very soon. Sending lots of strength and wellbeing thoughts your way.
Whoops, sorry to hear about the blood and the timing with the weekend. I really don't know what else to say that doesn't sound trite, so I'll just say Take care x x

Mrs Mc - So sorry to read your post. At least you know now, however I appreciate what a hollow comfort this is and how sad you must be feeling. I wish you all the best in ttc. Personally, I'm of the mindset now just to keep bashing away ,aim to get straight back in the saddle after mc. Apols for rubbish metaphors btw!

Whoops - sorry to read your post also. Wishing you all the best under the circumstances. I empathise with the sods law timing comment - last time I mc started on dh's birthday

Glimmer - I can't believe your story. I hope this time round all is OK. Its v hard to try and stay positive and not dwell on worst case scenarios but try to.

I don't post very much so here is a little background on me. I carry a rare genetic disorder - mostly fatal. 50/50 chance of passing it on. Have been pg 5 times. 3 mc. Have 1 dd 22 mo affected by disorder but doing OK for now. Am currently 7+5 pg and so far everything seems fine. No bleeding, lots of sickness. Much more so than any other pg. Have had moments where I've been so sure all will be well this time and this is my golden egg. Other times complete paranoia and panic. Have scan next thurs and CVS a couple of weeks after. Won't truly accept I am pg till after this. The waiting is hard.

Hi to everyone else x

MrsMc ? at work, so must be quick. Just popped on to see how you are doing ? so so sorry to hear about this outcome. I was so so excited for you when we both found out we were pg together, if I wasn?t at work, I?d be in floods of tears by now. I know that DH will be really sad to hear about it too ? he?s been constantly asking after you.

All I can say, is that if you feel emotionally ready, go straight for it ? its what I did after my 2nd mc at Christmas and I conceived about 15 days after my mc. I know we don?t know that I?m not going/already had my 3rd mc (my next scan is in 2 weeks), but I would second the opinion that you are more fertile after a mc. You must remember how long my cycles normally are, but this one immediately after the mc, was only about 30 days. I went straight back to taking my temp (it was how I really knew I?d had a mc, as it was back at baseline, coupled with the ?ve test, so I never had a scan). But I also noticed much more EWCM that cycle and made sure I pounced on DH that evening!! [best sex in ages!!]

Anyway, I do so hope that it happens like that for you ? I?ve heard so many stories of people who seem to have an early mc with their very first pg, and then go on to have another baby really easily ? it is almost as if your body needs to have a trial run to check all is working ok! I?m pretty sure I had a very very early mc, the cycle before I conceived DD, but I had never confirmed that I was pg that time, as it was so early. I only knew as my temp had been up for 16 days, before my period started, which was much much heavier than normal.

Big hugs to both you and DH ? keep talking and hugging!! The next few days/weeks are going to be full of ups and downs, do whatever makes you feel better. Drink lots, eat soft-boiled eggs, blue cheese and peanut butter on toast ? pretty much what I did for at least a week after my 1st mc!!!

Take care, sweetheart and remember we are here for you.

xxx

MrsMcJnr and whoopsfallenoveragain, I'm really sorry to hear what has happened to both of you.

so sorry for your news Mrs - You are such a brave lady xx

ohhhh, i was so hopeful for you! i came in here today just to look for this thread. i know how hard was to wait for 2 weeks. for other people might seem like nothing but during pregnancy 1 week is more equal to a few months really.

but im glad to hear it is a good story, your body is ready again and with no need of medical intervention.

im a very spiritual person and im hoping another l.o. is waiting in line right now to come to you two soon. stay well!

MrsMcJnr - so sad to read your news - I feel very close to you as you experienced the same start to your pg that I had. (dark spotting) - I was hoping, hoping, hoping for you... your success was giving me hope as I suspect if/when I manage to get to the early stages of pg again I may have the same scenario again. Don't be surprised if you have a bit of a meltdown over the weekend - it's normal.
On the trying again - my EPU gently advised to start asap as apparently we are more fertile for several months after a m/c.... so some hope???
Let's hope we can share some good news in a few months and graduate together very soon.

Glimmer / D4phne - shocked and saddened by your experiences - thinking of you.

To all of you going through this at the mo - whether you have good news, bad news or still feel in limbo, my thoughts and prayers are with all of you Sxx

Mrs M
How sad this is for you, we all feel for you. I'm glad you find suport here.

TTC go for it, it's the best thing for m'c that I know of! Watch out though, you may well be more fertile. Also, get advice, you zinc level will be low, and you'll need some.

Love and respect to your precious little one, winging its way back to mother nature.

Here's something to cling to or disregard- when we lost our baby I thought I would truly die, but then I thought that which is taken away, is returned by mother nature- in our case, it was, to bless my life as it had never been blessed. It may well be that way for you too.

whoops, I'm wiping a tear for you too. I have been through a m'c and lost a baby. You are so brave and lovely. You were the best place for that teeny to be.

I expect your work is not yet done, and that mother nature will be needing you shortly to help her in her great plan.

As with others, get advice and get your zinc up, it will be low now.

Heart felt apologies to anyone if I have caused offence.

MMK - do you have any links about zinc we should read - (I've been told my levels are rock bottom)?

God - i think that sounded a bit self centered given what others are going through at the moment. So sorry.

I was just fascinated that MMK feels zinc is esstential for those of us who had m/c'd.

Thanks mmk - I am lucky that I have 2 lovely children already - and there must have been a reason for this one not hanging on.
I haven't had any more bleeding yet I am hoping things will hold off til I go back to the hospital on Tuesday.

MrsMcJnr - Hope you and your dh are ok thinking of you both

Hope everyone else is ok

re the zinc, It may be mentioned on the Foregsight Preconceptionwebiste (I'll find the link for you) but Nim Barnes the chief chick there has loads of info on how m'c decreases your zinc, and how it needs to be higher before the next pregnancy.

I am glad that you have two children. I was eventually blessed with the gift of a child to love (after 13 years ttc, 7 IVF)and the day they put him in my arms, my world stopped turning, and it never started again.
To the rest of the world, I'm just an old chick going about her busines, but inside, my soul sings in gratitude for every second that we are blessed with our child!

Thanks MillyM

Ejb I liked your metaphors hon! I am so sorry about your condition. I have a couple of friends in similar positions and know how much anguish and agony they have been through but also how much incredible joy they experience when things turn out well. I?m really humbled by your courage and wish you well with this pregnancy. You certainly deserve it.

Fettle ? thank you, I was excited too that we were on the lovely journey together but there you go. We have only cried once today (when I told my sister) but I am sure there is plenty more to come call us sick but we?ve stuck some nice champagne in the fridge to drink tonight because we thought we might as well spoil ourselves, it?s not a celebration or anything, just a resignation to how things are I guess. That?s amazing you fell so soon this time, I didn?t realise (no negative thoughts now ? the scan will be great news, I?m sure of it) that?s our aim

Sunshinedays ? thank you. Don?t say that about spotting, I really hope you never get spotting in pregnancy again (I certainly hope I don?t) I look forward to us celebrating being pregnant together soon. Your question was not self-centered; sure we all wanted to know more about the zinc deficiency.

Goingfor3, Pinkranger, Jabuti, ? thank you all.

MMk ? thank you for your thoughts for me and for my lost little one. I truly believe that the soul comes back another time and that she?ll come back to me.

so sorry to hear your news, i am glad you do not have to have a procedure to add insult to injury. i have had a really bad day today, very sad and emotional, i thought i had rationalised everything, obviously the last preggie hormones have gone now and i can only describe how i feel as gutted and empty.
think i might steal your champagne idea, although my dh is out tonight fairly typical!!!maybe i can manage a bottle on my own.
thinking of you

xhotchocx

Very sorry Mrsmc- have followed your story from the BFP and I'm really sorry how it has turned out. I really dont know what to say and dont want to put my foot in it to be honest, but I just really want you to get strong again and hope to see you back on the temp buddies thread soon. You are sorely missed on there and I hope when I ttc later on in the year you can be my BFP buddy!!

lots of love xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

MrsMcJnr.
Really sorry to hear your news. I know how awful it is as I was in your shoes last year.
I had some very down days last year, but it does get better with time, believe me.
I'll be thinking of you & your DH.
As for TTC again, I was told you can try as soon as the bleeding has stopped. It's recommended to wait for 1 cycle, but that's just to make it easier to date any subsequent pg. If you feel up to it, and feel ready, then go for it.