Anyone else got the grumps?

[Imavinoops]

Only 30 weeks today... but...

Sore back. Tired after doing Christmas. Grumpy as hell.

I'm staying in bed, it's been decided.
Anyone else want to join me for a duvet day, fake wine and treats?

I'm 34wks and I'm truly surprised my OH hasn't killed me by now! He's been amazing looking after me, cleaning up, looking after DD and she's been amazing helping me around the house too (she's 8)!!

But....I am miserable, could sleep all day if I had the chance, my hips hurt, my belly is so tight all the time, my heartburn is horrendous and I can't wait for all this to to over!

Pregnancy this time round isn't fun, isn't enjoyable and I think I've only felt "glowing" for a few weeks!!

We had offers of help with flat pack furniture and I was very quick to signal to other half No! Thanks but no thanks.

I dont like losing control and am not having others take over. Only to make me extra grumpy.

We paid alot for nursery furniture and I want to watch &help every step. This way anything that goes wrong I can only blame myself or him. Rather than his family! No more room for me n him whilst assembling anyway lol

I also did some wall painting admittedly with a very long resting break in between each wall. Very small utility room and no ladders needed.

Ima I agree with you on the loss of control, I think that's been the most difficult thing to come to terms with in pregnancy - at the beginning it was a big shock to the system to experience such rapid changes to my body, and I've more or less accepted it now (or at least I'm more used to it!) but I can't wait to have my body back to myself!

Hyland I hear you on wanting to do it yourself (or at least help) and that's what's so frustrating about being in too much pain to do anything now! I wasn't so bad about a month ago (at about 28 weeks) and I helped DH paint the walls in the baby's room. I'm so glad we could do that together. But we still had the woodwork to paint and I couldn't really help with that any more so we had no choice but to accept help! However, when it comes to assembling all the furniture etc we will do that ourselves, or rather it will be him doing it and me helping as much as I can (probably not very much) and mostly just being bossy supervising

Good lord, I'm raging. Over bin bags. We need clear plastic sacks for our recycling overflow from Christmas. Text DP asking him to pick me some up (he works in Tesco) He rings me going "THERE AREN'T ANY! WE CAN ONLY USE BLACK ONES! BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH" Tried explaining that the council won't take black and told him exactly what we need but he shouts me down saying he needs to get back to work and they don't have them! I then promptly go on the Tesco website and 2 seconds later send a bloody photo! Apparently he saw that one... REALLY!

Sometimes I think he is playing the "poke the pregnant lady with a stick" game.

Hyland One of the reasons I have got everything ready so early is to avoid the family members trying to muscle in and help. I MUST control!

Chloe I have no idea what this "glowing" thing is tbh. I feel wrecked all the time. Almost like a hangover really! Not very pretty in my mind and nobody has commented that I am. Maybe I missed that bit.

Red I have a midwife appointment a week tomorrow so I'm hoping she can shed some light on the breech baby theory with me. I'll let you know!

I have a midwife appointment on Thursday. Wondering if she could explain my urge to throttle everyone around me. They're all being so UNREASONABLE at the moment.

I hear you justhavin. My family visited us today, nice, except they changed the arrangements eleventy billion times before they actually arrived and I got to the point where I was on the brink of telling everyone to fuck off and not bother! I have heartburn and the baby has hiccups, which I can categorically say mean his head is not in the down position ready to exit the premises, as they are coming from the side of my bump. Fml.

Just remembered a small thing which is really getting to me.

I can't zip up my boots any more because my stupid calves have become too fat.

I can't wear my ankle boots any more because they were already difficult to get on and now it's just not worth the bloody fight.

So I can't wear my winter boots and I'm fucked if I'm going to buy new ones.

So the choice is pumps (= cold and/or wet feet) or trainers (which look scruffy and/or silly with my smarter clothes)

Namechange I had this issue a few weeks ago, have boots now but is DP isn't here I can't put them on myself. I decided I could either wear the pumps and deal with it or just not go out. Much of the time I just didn't go out! Haha!

Is it just me or is anyone else worried about partners family trying to over take.

My family live in Scotland.

I think his family think they're being helpful. However they are disillusioned if they honestly think they are taking my baby for what they think is a rest for me. Didn't need help first time and I'll be damed if i need it this time.

Hyland My DP has a very large family, most of whom live close by. However, I quite like their level of involvement with DSS, what I say goes most of the time so I think in many respects I'm very lucky. (Especially compared to what I see on here!)

Saying that, baby fever may kick in for them. There are two little boys and this will be the first girl so I don't know if it will be any different because of that or not.

Notice the time of post, DP woke me up by snoring in my face. Then I got epic hot. Then I felt sick. Now I'm sitting up in bed feeling very awake but not at the same time. Also... baby can you not be kicking like a maddened football player right now...

Hyland what do they mean by taking the baby to give you a rest? Holding the baby for cuddles to give to a half hour to have a bath or something? Or for hours?

Is this your second DC? Maybe it was just me But I was shocked by how I felt panicked at managing both of them. My MIl was here during the home birth of my daughter (DC2) in case DS (DC1) woke up. She tried to tactfully leave the next morning to give us all some space but both me and DH were like small children clinging onto her, whimpering "no please don't go" We had felt totally in control after DS arrived - you know how people describe not wanting to leave the hospital with their first? Not us - we just wanted to be left alone with him. But the arrival of a second baby swept the rug out from underneath us. Not sure why, it's not like we hadn't had time to prepare!

Heaven only knows why we're having a third.

But if they mean hours then yes - totally unrealistic! Who takes a new baby away from a mother for hours??

My first daughter is 14 and by first marriage.

My concerns are stemmed from sister in law telling my partner she is going to request condensed hours!

I'm not sure why or what her motives are.

I'm sure i heard that she could request due to family commitments like child cate etc.

If they want to come over and keep me company fine. I'm all for them having a close relationship with baby.

If they want to offer to put steriliser on then that is ok

If they want to watch the baby whilst Staying in the house so i can have a quick shower .. probably ok.

But in truth i always made do with popping baby in the motorised swing in the doorway whilst i quickly washed.

If however they think they're taking baby out for a few hours to let me nap!

Thanks but no thanks

If she thinks she's taking one day a week off work to be a full time auntie carer.

Then she's very much mistaken.

Perhaps I have got confused.

Ugh what?? No. Just no. She's going to change her work hours? That's a bit nutso.

Like I will have Ds (4), DD1 (2) and newborn DD2. And if I had a SIL who happened to have spare time available she was willing to use to help out with regular childcare, I would bite her hand off.

But - huuuuuuuuge but - that's vastly different to having a teenager and a newborn. Vastly different.

Let's just hope she's a bit over excited and it doesn't come to fruition, and awkward conversations that be avoided

SIL is a good 10 years younger than me so crazy if they really think I'm going to hand over the reins to a girl/women I barely know. Have been with partner for 9 years, but don't have that type of relationship with SIL or his mum n dad!

Come from a big family and I am the eldest of 8. Very much use to young children/babies around.

Does seem like some conversations are taking place without me like her messaging partner... soooo you think my condensed hours are a good idea then?!

I have told him that i didn't leave my daughter with anyone until she was 2. This was actually just for nursery so she had some children to interact with.

I took her on a long gaul flight to Vancouver, when she was 6 months.

Hyland Crikey, sounds like you have a bit of an eager beaver there!

I tend to find that lots of that kind of chat is just chat unless they actually start doing stuff. People have lots of funny ideas when new babies are around. You might find she gives up if you and your husband aren't very receptive.

Your sister in law has definitely gone off reservation!

What does your partner say in response? Let's hope he can put her off gently but firmly.

So I have managed doing the weekly shop and have hung up a bit of laundry.

I think I'm done for the day. So frustrating sometimes!

He mentioned about me going to a football match with him and getting a babysitter. Sooooo i reminded him that the baby would be barely 2 months olds and therefore no!

I have to tred carefully as he'll take it as me attacking his family. I have however said several occasions now that i have no intention of leaving baby anywhere with anyone.

Whilst stating I am happy for his sister etc to have a close bond by coming over when ever they want.

Hoping i have just got the wrong end of the stick. Haven't had 5 mins alone with his sister to delve into what her idea is by changing hours. Especially as i thought she was wanting desperately to save for a house.

I have made myself a coffee today and put some stuff in the washing machine but not switched it on.

Taken Christmas cards down but that is about it... been very lazy today.

In fact yesterdays dinner plates are still hanging around!

Hyland Sounds like you had a productive day! I highly approve.

Hi all. Having a shit day too. 31 weeks with huge amounts of cyst pain, lots of anxiety about probable birth defect, can't get out of bed. Want to smash the screen when reading all the happy and excited antenatal threads.

Hi
MatildaWormwoodRoolsOK

What have they told you to expect ?

As yet, it's unclear: some form of renal problem. Struggling with the uncertainty and the disorganisation around hospital appointments.

I agree with you about the disorganisation around hospital appointments. Shocking!

Renal as in Kidney issues I assume.

How frustrating that you are in limbo until your beautiful baby is born.