Staying posifrickentive- Thread 13 for ladies pg after mc

[LynseyH]

And here we are at thread 13... we can do this

Thanks sah.

Seriously unable to relax.. Can't settle to doing anything and even the kids aren't distracting me much! I know it's not long till 8am but blimey, I'm a nervous wreck

Congrats Ginger and good luck for tomorrow MrsAlan - all fingers and toes crossed for you.

Back pain seems to have eased off significantly today, still there but much more bearable, however I now have a horrible headache which I can't seem to shift. grr. Seems to be one thing after another!

Mind you I will take all the aches in the world if it means this pregnancy sticks and we end up with a healthy baby.

Morning ladies.
I tentatively joined in the 'due April' thread aswell today, only read through a few posts but it seems quite romantic over there where they don't seem to suffer our usual frets and anxiousness, it's a bit difficult to tell someone who doesn't know the fear that your just breathing through each day to get to the next milestone.
I've worried through the first missed period, the 6 week scan, 8wk scan, 10wk scan , 12week scan with nuchal and viability.
Had a brief time of feeling elation until it was time for the 16wk gender scan then all the terror came back in a flood, same with the 20wk scan, then following that, again, it was somewhat elation and happiness with overwhelming joy and excitedness and now I'm 25wks, I'm just counting down the days to 30weeks when I know he can be born successfully, albeit not ideal.
I don't know eh! But it's definetly summing it up to say it's a rollercoaster of a journey 😩

Hugs and kisses to the other ladies here who know and exist through the struggle ❤❤

Bec - I get what you're saying about the due date threads. I'm on the May thread but I tend to read/post very rarely and I don't talk about the miscarriage really. I wanted any of the women on that thread to enjoy the blissful ignorance of not realising how easily things can go wrong!

I'm feeling a lot more positive since my 20-week scan and now that I'm feeling the baby move all the time I'm reassured constantly that baby is alive and kicking!

My next hurdle is a scan at 28 weeks in mid-February (I have to be scanned at 28, 32 and 36 due to my blood disorders meaning that the baby needs checking for anaemia, or something along those lines).

Obviously that's pretty scary for you as you know you are possibly susceptible to a complication, so In hindsight i feel silly for just the normal fearful fretting now 😩
But I've got everything crossed for your next hurdle 😘😘
How are feeling about having a 3/4d scan? The company I had my gender scan with is now bombarding me with 'special offers' lol I'd like to have one but I'm not sure with the anxiety how I feel about having them peek in there again, it's almost like the more you have them poke and prod the more chance there is of them discovering a new problem!
If I do pluck up the courage do you think 28 weeks or 30 weeks when he's a bit plumper? It would be really odd to see him and see if he looks like the other boys, so far all my boys have been pretty identical, just slightly different hair colours!
I wonder if they can see hair lol

I have so much to catch up on! I apologise if I miss anyone out!

lynsey I hope the sickness has gone and you're feeling better. Glad the MW came out to you!

Macauley and lucky good to hear from you both.... so exciting that it's all so close now!! Hope all goes well and keep us posted on the arrival of your little ones!

Sah sorry to hear you've been feeling unwell too... I had breathlessness a few times but it went away. I would try to ask your gp just to put your mind at ease like others said.

Badger I think the denial is so common... I was exactly the same and didn't buy anything! Now I'm 25+5 and baby is moving more which makes it feel more real. I still don't actually believe I'll have a baby at the end of this!

fuzzy I'm so glad you're scan went well and congrats! A little girl! So exciting!!

purple hope you're feeling better about movements... I worry about it every day! But last night, after a very long day celebrating my friends 30th, I got into bed at half 11 and he was going mad!!! Kept me up until half 2! I was then worried about too many movements!!

flourishing so great to hear from you! Glad baby is doing well!!

bec it's hard with the due date threads... I'm on the April one too but I don't keep up with it as much as I don't want to bring them down with all of my anxieties!!

Sorry to everyone feeling so unwell... touch wood I think the flu jab has helped this winter! I'm absolutely exhausted today! Had my friends 30th yesterday and made it too
11! The rest of my friends came stumbling into our travelodge at 3am and I heard about all of their antics this morning. I had a great time but it was hard to dance/socialise as much in a crowded London bar when you're 26 weeks pregnant!! It's amazing how many people come up and talk to you about it too... and touch your bump!!

Sorry if I've missed anyone... hope all ok. X

To be honest my blood issues aren't making me worry more. I'm being well monitored by the hospital so any problems will hopefully be picked up and be able to be dealt with.

My biggest worry is that I'll have to be induced at 38 weeks and I've heard that labour is more painful with induction. Quite frankly I was petrified of 'normal' labour enough; I could do without any extra pain

I'm not fussed about having a 3/4d scan myself. I think I have an unusual attitude to scans. I haven't been bothered about getting pictures at my scans and I don't look at the screen all the time during the scans. I think I associate scans with bad news so I'm just bracing myself for the worst

INeed, fingers crossed your labour and birth is easy.

I was induced with my first and it wasn't so bad except the labour just didn't progress. Which lead to other intervention.

My friend recently had her baby at the birthing unit and had a waterbirth she said she'd be happy to do it again, its pregnancy she finds rough going.

So based on that I really really hope I can have a waterbirth.

Bec, I'm similar to INeed, I really really don't think my nerves could take another scan, I was so expecting the sonographer to tell me things were wrong at my twenty week scan. I just want the rest of the pregnancy to go by quietly and happily and meet my healthy daughter god willing.

If you're javong ghe 3D scan I'd have it later, so you can see your little boy all cute and chubby.

Jpeg I hate people touching my bump! Almost want to rub their stomachs right back and compliment their paunch!

lol new shoes I promise you induction in general isn't anymore painful, when people say that they are referring to the oxytocin drip that you get put on if you don't progress well, I've been induced 5 times to date all around the 38 week mark and once at 37 and I've never needed the IV.
I think to help if you speak to your MAU they will give you 48 hourly sweeps coming up to your induction which helps and then you have the new paper type pessary which the put up in the cervix and it's a lot gentler then the old dissolving pessery which was quite intense and fast. The new type stays in place for upto 24hours until your starting to get twinges and niggles, then it's removed.
Then as soon as your 2-3cm depending on how well your progressing they may break your waters, but not always.
From my experience the pains do intensify after they break your waters, so with that info you could add into your birth plan about wanting the regular sweeps and the desire to not have the drip unless completely necessary and again to mention that you'd rather not have them break your waters for you unless they have too!
Also can I say that there's no shame in going into labour with the plan of having an epidural, I had one with my first and to be fair I think it was a really good idea as it was the first time feeling those pains which in itself is pretty scary and also it will most likely be the longest labour your likely to have so even if you plan to say, get to 6cm then reassess if you would like pain relief, then feel empowered by that decision and not disappointed, my mum alsways says to me in labour, "why be in pain when you don't have to be" lol
With the others I knew what to expect and knew the time would be less and I managed on gas and air or nothing xxx

Are you due in May fuzzy x

I'm due May 26th Bec.

We are all only weeks apart! So exciting xx

Thanks Bec - you've said some really helpful things there

My plan regarding pain relief is to not have a plan. I'll manage without anything for as long as possible, then when it becomes too much I'll have gas & air, then if/when it becomes unbearable again I'll step it up and ask for proper pain relief. If I can manage without pethidine I would rather avoid it (I don't like the sound of the side effects as feeling woozy panics me) and although I would really rather manage without an epidural, if I'm in distress then on balance it will be better all round to have one. So I'm hoping my open-mindedness will stand me in good stead!

ineed I had an induction with DS at 37 weeks as I had been seriously ill & wasn't sure I'd get that far.
Leading up to the induction from 36 weeks I did a lot of walking & squats, also there's a leg massage that helps bring on labour but I started that bang on 36 incase it did.
I was already 1cm but DS was still high up. They started me at 9pm with pessary, was woken up with contractions at 2am, sent up to delivery at 9am as 4cm but I was bouncing on the birthing ball/walking a lot around the ward.
Then they took 2.5 hours to get a line in me before breaking waters at 1pm & DS born at 2pm.

It is painful after they break your waters but I would see how you're progressing as it's going to be painful anyway.
I told the midwife no pethidine/diamorphine & just had gas & air. & I didn't want the drip to stimulate labour unless we were on day 3/4. If you want an epidural, have you got a partner who will be proactive? As I didn't want one pre-labour, during active labour I was begging for one but DS was too fast so there was no time anyway. So if you're happy to have one, you may need to push for it.
Also if you do end up with the drip, women I know who have had it, advised to get the epidural for that stage as it's painful.

They will want a cannula in you after you're 4cm incase you need fluids.

My advice is stay active & mobile, have someone pro-active with you who knows what you want as you do become very unfocused.
& it can be more painful than natural labour as the body is stimulated faster than normal so do not be afraid to change your mind pain relief wise.

I was told I'd be days as first baby so my birthing partner was finishing work when DS was born. I had to argue with my consultant that I needed to push to which midwives told her off so you really need someone fighting your corner so to speak.

Hope it doesn't come to that for you but inductions aren't scary if you have all the facts & try to stay mobile.

mrsalan I've got a scan a hour after you & im struggling myself even though baby is moving loads. I hope you manage to distract yourself & 8am is here before you know it.

Hope those who are ill are feeling better & those with dates coming up, manage to get through it.

bec I had a 4D at 32 weeks & the consultant said there wasn't much fluid or room then it is so hard to see, so sooner rather than later if you do want a scan.

32 week scan tomorrow to determine c section or not & I'm happy to see baby but I'm now back in the I don't want a c section. The anxiety of being in hospital is starting to come back.
Midwife says just have to see the scan & go from there & I know I can have a natural c section which I would like just the recovery sounds horrific.

Also my colustrum is starting to turn milky but braxton hicks have stopped this week which is good.

I think I need to focus on finishing house & getting the baby stuff sorted this week so I feel more "pro active."

Hope everyone has a relaxing Sunday.

Thanks Dolerite - my situation is a little unusual in that I'm single. I have two birth partners lined up (to cover all eventualities!). One is my mum and the other a good friend. I'm planning on talking through what I want with both of them in advance but also writing it down so that if things get stressful they don't risk forgetting or daring to override what I've said

My consultant has said that as long as I don't end up having to be hooked up to loads of machines that I might be able to use the birthing pool despite being induced (I thought that being induced ruled it out as an option) so that's another option to help pain relief that I'm considering (though the consultant led labour ward only has two birthing pools so I'm being careful not to set my heart on anything).

I hope your scan goes well tomorrow.

Thanks for the advice re; the scan 😘

Good luck for the scans tomoz girlies xxx

That's really good Ineed that you're covered.
I ended up with consultant, junior doctor, midwife & senior midwife all in the room but didn't realise until afterwards. My consultant said I'd be days in labour so told my birthing partner she'd be fine to get there after work, but DS was like nope.
Though I have had a lot of midwives & doctors say my induction is not normal haha & unheard of.

Sorry just saw how long the post was! There are a lot of induction threads on here, I read a lot of them before mine & it does give you a wider view.

Hope you get at least one of the pool rooms, it'll only be if they think the baby is in distress that they won't want you in the pool so hope you get to go in as that's a good way of pain management.

Thanks bex. DS had his face mostly squished into the placenta so scan was a bit difficult. Got some lovely images though & definite proof he was a boy haha.

Hope I didn't miss anyone before my mammoth birth post.

Eek... talk of labour! I'm also hoping to get by with as little pain relief as possible purely because as newshoes said I don't like the sound of pethadine making me feel dizzy/sick/disorientated and then not being able to do anything about it for hours until it wears off. I'd also like to be as active as possible and possibly give birth on all 4s or kneeling so epidural would prevent that. All that being said I'm well aware that it doesn't always go to plan and if I'm really struggling I'll probably be asking them to give me everything they've got lol 😂. I'll hopefully be able to use a pool too although they only have 2 so I guess it depends if they're in use when you arrive. Ive also had a little venture into hypnobirthing but feels to early to be rrally trying it yet. I'm also on a June dates thread which has now moved to a private Facebook group (although technically due end of May) but I find it helpful to be able to talk to people at the same stage as me especially with it being my first and then be here to to talk about the anxiety side of things. 5 days til 20 week scan, tick tock. Same as you bec I'm counting down each milestone.

I'm really struggling sleeping at the moment and don't know why. I don't know if it's just a pregnancy thing or because the scan is on my mind now it's getting closer but I wake up every few hours and it's getting so tiring. I have a massive body pillow so it's not that I'm uncomfortable but I'm just restless, and need to week etc and having crazy dreams. Anyone have advice to help sleeping?

Good luck for tomorrow mrsalan

Also good luck dino hope all goes well.

I was induced at 38 weeks and went from 1cm dilated to DD being here in 40 minutes and yes was painful but I don't think it was any more painful than normal (but I've only had one!)

Ineednewshoes, I'm due 25th May, but due to health complications I'm having scans every 4 weeks but yeah I'm a wreck about having them every time I don't think I could join another thread!!!

I had a mobile epidural with dd. It was a long and complicated labour that the midwife thought would end in c-section. The mobile epidural was amazing. I could still feel my legs and contractions, could feel how and when to push. When my placenta got stuck it meant the manual removal didn't hurt. I'm hoping for a water birth this time but would have an epidural again if I ended up strapped to a bed with monitors like last time. I loved giving birth. I loved skin to skin and the very first feed (despite the lactation failure that came after). The absolute magic of seeing dd for the first time. It's amazing!

Hi everyone, lots of chat about birth! When do we make birthing plans? I'm 28+2 today. Got the ante natal classes starting a week tomorrow.

When my mum had me, she was numb down one side for quite a lot of hours and the doctors were concerned. When I had major surgery a few years ago they said it was unlikely that it would happen to me but I could choose to have morphine based pain relief instead so I chose that. I would really like the epidural if possible I think for the birth though.

The baby has been moving normally again so I'm feeling reassured. No more of that funny looking discharge either.

Sorry meant to say mum had an epidural with me. Back in 1989 when it was still fairly new I think.

Love all the labour and birthing chat. All so exciting my horrid twinges have been much more manageable today and the nausea has gone again. Waiting to find out if I have a urine infection, will hopefully know tomorrow.
But as usual nothing is quiet this end and now it's my 4 yr olds turn to have a nasty case of tonsillitis. Was my 3 yr old just before Christmas. Doc said today (out of hrs) that they have a good case for being referred to ENT so another mummy panic today at seeing my boys put to sleep!
Off to bed now, just as bump has properly woken up and having a dance on my bladder!!

Bit of an odd day for me today. First day of maternity leave so I've just waved off dh and dd to school. Dd is really upset because she wants to stay with me so I feel guilty. It's also exactly a year to the day that I miscarried and I'm having flashbacks. My miscarriage was similar to labour in the end so I had the urge to push and everything came away all at once. It was very traumatic in the end. I feel so sad but at the same time I know I need to be grateful for this baby. Not sure what I'm going to do with myself now. I also have the sore throat back which is worrying me as I don't want to be ill when the baby is born and pass it on. Good luck to those having scans today.