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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Pregnancy after mc - part 5 the support we need - luck to all

998 replies

firststar · 12/02/2007 14:23

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firststar · 27/02/2007 16:06

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cupcake78 · 27/02/2007 16:21

Firststar

Me time is a good idea. I think I need a holiday. Thinking about it I haven't had any time off work since early September so maybe I need to do something about it. A holiday would be lovely.

Sorry to be so miserable at the moment I promise I will try and perk up.

Mumpbump · 27/02/2007 16:29

Whereabouts do you live, cupcake? We went to a fab B&B in Bath at the weekend which I would definitely recommend for a romantic bit of time out. I think we're going back there in the summer to have a bit of R&R.

Mumpbump · 27/02/2007 16:30

Sorry - point being that you could always have a short break in the UK to recharge your batteries, rather than a full on holiday.

littlefrog · 27/02/2007 17:02

just popping in v quickly to say belated congratulations to T4T! so pleased for you!
internet currently up the creek, so not really able to catch up properly - hope everyone else is well!

firststar · 27/02/2007 17:15

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PurpleLostPrincess · 27/02/2007 21:46

cupcake, I totally empathise with you and agree that you don't need to apologise! I've been off work for almost three weeks now 'resting' and I've watched sooo many films its driving me crayyyzzzyyyy!!!! I should get my blood test results tomorrow so I'll find out if I can go back to work next week but I'm wondering if I'll be able to cope at all!

It feels like I've been in my tenth week forever - its the longest week of my life! I m/c'd twice before at this point so I'm really nervous that it will happen again. On top of this hyperemesis whatchamacallit thingy, I'm completely emotionally and physically drained!!

I know its easier said than done but chin up and hope you find something to keep you going... xxxx

((((((((((hugs))))))))))))

PurpleLostPrincess · 27/02/2007 22:25

rubles - yes I'm 10+4 (I think!?) and I've got a little kind of bump. Either that, or I've got water retention and I'm filling out a little early lol! This is my 5th pg so I guess my body has given up! I'm already finding it hard to sleep on my tummy and therefore struggling to sleep at all. I lay there day and night feeling my tummy. I'm already quite big but this hyperemesis oojimaflip seems to be making me lose weight a little. My shape is certainly changing...!

Mumpbump · 28/02/2007 09:33

Morning all!!

At last, a sunny day... Feels like the first one we've had in ages! Feeling much better today. Both dh and I were in bed last night by 21h - it really is amazing what a decent night's sleep can do for your mental health!! Plus I got all weepy yesterday at a thread about books to explain the arrival of no. 2 to a toddler so those pg hormones are obviously still coursing around my bod!!

Rubles - can't feel my uterus, but I can tell that everything else is being pushed out of the way. Dh said this morning that I have a little bump right at the bottom of my tummy, above my pelvic bone and I can really tell that my clothes are snug on my waist now!

Princess - I can imagine how scary this week is for you, but you're over half way through already! Only another three days to go and you'll leave this milestone behind...

Hoping there will be good news from the scans today!!

cupcake78 · 28/02/2007 15:26

Just wanted to say thank you for all your support yesterday. Talked to DH last night and had a big cry. Have booked next week off work and can't wait. I think we will go away for a night and trying to arrange a girls lunch out over the weekend just to have a laugh and let my hair down.

Saw my friends little boy last night who is nearly two and he was just so cute it really reminded me why I am doing this.

Thanks again.

Mumpbump I am glad you are feeling better today. It is amazing what a bit of sunshine can do.

firststar · 28/02/2007 16:21

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jules99 · 28/02/2007 18:13

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Woooozle100 · 28/02/2007 18:26

jules -

if you had a missed mc end of jan then you could be way out on yr dates - there is no real way of predicting when you ovulated/ conceived. The lack of lmp in between makes it all so difficult to date. That's pretty much why some advise to wait after mc before ttc. Try not to worry x

Daisybump · 28/02/2007 19:45

Jules...try to stay positive...as ejb says, there's no way of knowing when you ovulated. After my first mc I didn't get a period for nearly six weeks, but after the second one, it was just under three weeks and I'm usually a 28-day girl. From past experience I also know that I ovulate really early in my cycle as well (around 7 days) so am usually a week out with dates anyway. i know it's an anxious wait, but it sounds hopeful if your missed m/c was less than a month ago anyway. Sending lots of ((((((hugs)))))) and positive vibes your way. xx

ejt1764 · 28/02/2007 20:19

jules - thinking of you - hang on in there.

cupcake - just want to send you the biggest ((((((((((((((((()))))))))))))))))))))) you've ever had ... you hang on in there too.

Take care all, I feel bloody dreadful - but at least am slightly less panicky now that I was - thank you for your reassuring words.

ejt

jules99 · 28/02/2007 20:56

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Daisybump · 28/02/2007 21:07

jules....modern tests are very sensitive and can pick up very faint traces of hcg but not sure how early they can detect anything. the human body can do some very odd, unpredictable things and perhaps you ovulated just after the missed m/c?? Try to keep your spirits up...fingers crossed for you sweetie xx

Daisybump · 28/02/2007 21:26

Jules...just read your other thread....can't imagine what you must be going through and wish there were words to help you through this. Best of luck for Friday...are you going am or pm?
just had a look at Lesley Regan's book 'your pregnancy week by week' She says that at four weeks (ie two week old embryo) the embryo only measures 2mm. Could they have meant that the embryo was three weeks and not the pregnancy?

jules99 · 28/02/2007 22:01

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firststar · 01/03/2007 09:15

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time4tea · 01/03/2007 11:22

Hello all,
I've been really thinking of you all, excuse the long post but I've had a couple of sessions of quiet time catching up on the posts since I was in hospital.

love to all but special messages to:

JULES 99: even my DH sent you a post on this! we conceived again straight after the mc/ERPC, but I did have one proper period between. A kind friend who had been in our position said that she and others conceived straight away after mc, apparently you are so awash with hormones that getting pg is easy. With us, it had taken a year to conceive the baby we lost, then one month to conceive again! that is even with me being reasonably well informed about cervical mucus, temps etc. Although after mc, the same kind friend recommended the book by Toni Weschler on fertility and that was a real help.
So sorry to hear that the last appt wasn't so encouraging, but the others are right (esp. quoting the wise Prof Regan, my guru!!) I'll keep my fingers crossed for you.

MUMPBUMP I cried my eyes out at both my early scans, and it was very nice to walk past the EPAU with Torin as we went home, and think, OK, that's in the past now. All the midwives on the ward asked if they would see me again and I really sincerely said probably not, its a miracle enough having two safe and healthy boys... it reminded me that this hard time we have all had on pg after mc is temporary.

FIRST-STAR good to see all is well...

TAICHIMUM I sympathise, pg is tough with a toddler making demands. My best friend advised me to just chill out about telly (as long as reasonable quality - CBeebies is genuinely educational) and to have plenty of cheap treats to hand (new books etc). Outings are also good but easier said than done in this wintery weather. Roll on spring.

CUPCAKE really sympathise with feeling bored, lonely and demoralised. I find good food always a help, plus I did treat myself to a day at a spa. good books also!

PLP - hypermesis! you poor thing. Good luck, hope it resolves.

HERE'S MY NEWS...

I'd love to send a photo, but no idea how to attach a jpeg. I can only think, if you email me ([email protected]) I can email back with an attachment.... I realise this has blown any kind of anonymity, but not too bothered about that...

LOVE TO ALL ON THIS AMAZING THREAD XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Torin Oscar Ray news service 26 February 2007.
Thanks for all the emails, they kept my chin up when in hospital (long nights listening to other mothers managing not just to sleep, but also to snore, while their mobiles went off all night, and not even the possibility of making a cup of tea, let alone someone bringing me one, it?s great to be home.)
Lots of you have asked questions about Torin, Lorcan, and how we all are. Excuse the round robin (hoping very much that as it isn?t Christmas, no-one will grass me up by sending this to Simon Hoggart who will laugh at us). Those of you with Amnesty experience will recognise the format as a News Service (For response only) which adds to ?Frequently Asked Questions? by including a few points that we?d like to include ourselves...)
How is Lorcan taking it (most Frequently Asked Question, along with comments like ?Let the sibling rivalry begin?)
This picture of Lorcan welcoming Torin home says it all. He has a little smile which only appears when Torin does: and one of the first nights we were home he said goodnight only to Torin, with many kisses, and no-one else (mum, dad, grandma, Auntie Louise) didn?t get a second glance. He sees Torin as a ?little kitten? whereas he is ?the big kitten?. Torin is also the source of lots of lavatory humour, one of his first acts on arrival in the world was to pee on a doctor, Lorcan loves telling this story ?Cheeky Torin?, and has started to embellish it (?Cheeky Torin did a weewee on ALL THE DOCTORS!?)
Birth
The operation itself was very smooth but there was a bad moment as it took Torin a while to get breathing properly ? including a call out to the paediatric ?crash team? to come immediately to theatre to help which was really frightening. After a couple of hours of monitoring in the Special Baby Care Unit all was well, and the moment when I saw Andrew pushing the little cot down the corridor to my bed on the ward was like him being born a second time (I couldn?t go with them to the unit, which was sad, and it was sad for Andrew to see the tiny fellow being x-rayed, injected for tests etc). But no harm done, and he is doing very well now. I can?t describe the relief that he is here and OK.
Photo on the allusers email
Everyone liked the photo a lot and someone asked ?What?s your secret?? Andrew says the secret is Photoshop, he morphed my picture with one of Winona Ryder to make me look more agreeable. I was feeling a bit chemically enhanced after the narcotics I had received to make the operation possible. Although the friendly anaesthetist, Ollie, explained that only a small amount of diamorphine is required for an epidural ? the equivalent street value in heroin would be about 10p. So much for my fantasy of being pumped as full of drugs as Iggy Pop for a day.
What is Torin like?
He started off an alarming beetroot red, but this went in a day, and he looks just like Lorcan when he was born, but with dark hair, and dark blue-brown eyes, instead of fair hair and blue eyes. The shape of the face is similar, and he even has a chin-dimple, although a little less pronounced than Lorcan?s. He doesn?t cry much so far ? only when getting undressed or changed, and if he?s hungry. He?s easy to calm, you can just hold him up and talk to him, and he looks quite attentively at me, or at black and white contrasts (shadows etc). He likes moving his hands over his face and realised immediately it is good to suck your own fingers if there?s nothing much else going on.
Where is the name from?
We found the name Torin in a book of Celtic names by a Professor Loreto Todd, she identifies it as Irish, and also known in Cornwall and the Isle of Man. It is linked to the Gaelic for thunder, and therefore also the Nordic Thor. We also hear Torin Douglas on the BBC talking about the arts. Oscar is also Irish, it means ?lover of deer?. Andrew?s great-grandfather, who was Swiss, was called George Oscar Ray, so there?s a link for both of us.

Let us know other questions ? always glad to hear from you X

firststar · 01/03/2007 12:31

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rubles · 01/03/2007 12:48

Oh T4T that makes me want a baby so so so so so so so so so SOOOO much.

Mumpbump · 02/03/2007 11:55

Good morning all! Spring is definitely in the air today, isn't it??? Glorious sunshine down here in London...

T4T - lovely post and very encouraging re: acceptance by Lorcan. My ds will be 20 months(ish) and I'm already worrying about how he will react so thanks for the reassurance!

Jules - I think what everyone is saying is right. There is a thread somewhere about testing early and the chances of picking up a positive result. The reason they recommend you test just before your period is due is because that is when the result is more reliable, but that doesn't mean you won't get a positive result if you test earlier than 2 weeks after conception. Let's hope that the next scan is positive, but if your hormone levels are high, I think that is a good sign.

Cupcake - glad that you have booked in some time for yourself. Staying somewhere away from home last weekend was such a treat for us, even with 3 children!!

Ejt - pleased you're feeling better.

Hello to everyone else. Am a bit tired after a harrowing time with my mum - who is now in hospital - so don't feel up to writing much today, but I will catch up properly later...

firststar · 02/03/2007 13:28

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