Urgh, first contact with maternity services didn't go well :-(

[Blueskyrain]

If anyone remembers my previous posts, I'm pregnant with my first (only 5 1/2 weeks), and very, very nervous. I've got a severe phobia of needles, and the prospect of pregnancy terrifies me. But I want it, so I'm trying to just get on with it. I don't have a GP as yet.

I saw on the midwife pages of my hospital that I could self refer, so I thought I'd get the ball rolling that way. Apparently, no I can't. I have to register with a GP first, and see my GP first. Some faff but ok.

I mentioned my needle phobia and that I'd need to speak to them, or see them first to work out some way of me being able to do the blood tests etc, and her response - we see a lot of women with issues with needles. They just get over it. You might need a lot of injections/bloods etc, and there's a lot worse to come with labour pain, so most woment just get over it.

Thanks.

Thanks a lot.

I'm now having a good cry and am in a complete panic about things. She didn't say it nastily, but she had all the tact of a block of stone, and has made me feel 10 times worse.

I avoided needles of any kind for 20 years my phobia of them was so bad but I was referred for cba therapy during pregnancy and it worked amazingly well. I ended up having all the usual bloods taken as well as anti D shots, more needles when my son turned out to be breech and they tried to turn him and I got through a c section when they couldn't. Without the therapy I don't know how I would have coped so I highly recommend seeing your gp and asking to be referred.
Also ask for the emla cream and a butterfly needle, I can't honestly say the only needle I felt was a steroid jab to my bottom. After so many I've learned it's never as bad as I think it's going to be and I've had more blood tests since and had a general for teeth removal which I would have avoided in the past.
Hope you get the help you need, good luck.

You don't have to have any bloodwork done. It's your choice.

Good that you're getting counselling. You're going to need it. It is up to you to sort out this issue. I still hate needles and have fainted during/after blood tests. Despite that, I did IVF. Where there is a will, there is a way. I even did a finger prick blood test where I had to prick my finger. That was horrible. But I did it. Took me a couple of days to psyche myself up no about 10 mins with the thing on my finger before I did it. It's your job to look after you and your baby growing inside.

Not RTFT but I was seriously terrified of blood tests and had refused them for a long time. Tried hypnotherapy as a last ditch attempt when my fertility investigations were stalling because I wouldn't do tests and miraculously it worked.

I'm still a wreck going for them but at least I can do them.

You also need Emla cream- you won't feel a thing. Offer arm, look away sob into shoulder and they will be done before you can change your mind!

You'll need to work through this, unless you plan to refuse needles (which you have the right to do, but you'd have to balance it against what's in your baby's best interests, and to be honest I think you already know it would be better to sort this out somehow!)

One cool thing I learned while pregnant was that your local hospital will probably have a phlebotomy department - a clinical lab who specialise in taking blood samples. They are incredibly experienced and have seen it all. Could you try getting referred to them for your blood tests and advice? (I got referred to them later in pregnancy when I had to have regular blood tests to monitor a pregnancy-related condition, they were super and taught me some great ways of avoiding fainting after blood tests, which I had been prone to before. I am pretty sure you could either ring for advice or get referred to them for specialist help.)

You're a mum now. Think of how much you would do to keep your baby safe. What the responsibility of having a child to look after means.

It's all about the baby now and your hcps will absolutely expect you to have that attitude, at least. At the moment it sounds like you don't care about risks to your baby and are expecting hcps to bear the full weight of that responsibility.

Having children has forced me to confront most of my fears head on. It's a shock to realise you can make yourself do most things if it's for your baby, but that's where your heart and head have to be in order to be a parent. No one else can do it for you or will see it as their job either.

You're completely putting the responsibility onto other people when this is your issue to sort. "They" will not have to weigh up the risks - you are. Parenting is about putting your child first even when it utterly cripples you in every way, and pregnancy is the first part of that.

She wasn't horrible - she was realistic.

Agree that YOU need to take responsibility for this, not the midwife and not the GP and not the phlebotomist. It is not their problem that you have a needle phobia. They cannot "fix" it for you. As others have stated, sedation isn't an answer when you're pregnant.

Routine bloods may not be frequent, but if you are ill in your pregnancy at all they are going to want to take blood. That is not something you can predict and avoiding seeking medical help because of your phobia could be extremely serious.

You need to be proactive about this and start thinking about how YOU are going to resolve this problem right away rather than crying and expecting someone else to "fix" it for you.

I think going forward op you will need to do a lot of work on yourself to get around this - plus it will benefit you greatly after the birth also.

I have private care and the difference between that and NHS is staggering, I also found my booking in appointment to be a rather flat intrusive experience when I was actually excited about it all.

Get some treatment for your phobia as once your on the NHS train your kind of rail roaded in to what they want. Plus I'm not sure if they can flag you up for missing treatment/appointments as that's the impression they tried to give me after a mix up with several appointments.

I had a c-section last Tuesday night and I'm literatly like a pin cushion - go and get some help with your phobia

I used to have a needle phobia which I mostly 'got over'. For me, it wasn't about the pain, it was just the idea of a needle pushing into my skin. Strangely, I find blood tests much easier than injections so you might find you do too along with a little numbing cream (which is NOT a risk to your baby). It is utterly ridiculous to say, well childbirth will hurt a lot more. A phobia is not rational and doesn't respond well to pull yourself together type comments. One thing I can say for sure is that it is something that gets easier the more you do it. Once you've had the first injection, your brain accepts it is not the huge event it has built up and gets a little bit less anxious each time.

You will not get a sedative to enable you to have an injection or blood test so get that out if your head now!

Unfortunately you need to find a way to manage this. You cannot get through pregnancy and birth without seeing a needle. They don't use needles for the sake of it, their are tests and procedures that need done for your and your babies health.

How about hypnotherapy? Private counselling? Please look into this soon. Not all health workers will be unsympathetic but they are stretched and having a baby bring the need for tests.

One other thing- what if you develop Gestational diabetes, it involves finger pricks around 5 times a day and possibly insulin injections. Obviously hope you won't but GD can strike anyone and you must be prepared. Also blood thinning injections can be required daily if you have a c section.

I'm sorry but the only person who has to 'weigh up the risk' is you. If you can't bring yourself to have the tests then you can't, but it is your decision and not that of the HCP.

Please read this. Don't forget they can't force you to have a blood test.

Here's what you need to do:

1. Take a deep breath and remind yourself that no one can make you do anything you don't want to do.
2. Look into getting CBT for phobias, either an online course or in person.
3. Plan to go your appointment and keep and open mind. Know that you can absolutely refuse the blood test if you really need to, but keep an open mind and go with the intention of discussing it with the midwife. It may be that she can reassure you or make some suggestions that will make it a lot easier for you. They see all sorts of women and I'm sure they've dealt with this before.
4. Again try to keep an open mind. Sedation or no needles are not the only two options. There may be ways you can work around the phobia.

One suggestion could be to lie down (as I said on your previous thread, I always request to lie down for blood tests) and face the other way. Maybe you could even bring some headphones and play some music or sounds that will distract you. This way you will never see the needle or even hear the sounds of it being prepared. All you'll feel is a scratch on your arm a little bit like getting caught on a bramble. Stubbing your toe is much more painful and I'm sure you've experienced that plenty of times!

I know that you can't just talk someone out of a phobia, telling someone how safe planes are doesn't cure a fear of flying. But perhaps reminding yourself of some of these reassurances may give you the strength to actually go to that first appointment with an open mind.

Hi OP I have never had a problem with needles BUT I used to have terrible issues with swallowing tablets . People used to mock me but I would literally not ever take pain killers unless the were dissolved no matter how much pain I was in - I refused antibiotics etc because I was too afraid of tablets.

When I was pregnant with my first dd I didn't take folic acid or any other supplements during the first trimester and I ignored an ongoing urine infection because I was terrified of being given tablets.

When I got to about 24 weeks my blood pressure went up and I got ill, I was suddenly in hospital and being given tablet after tablet.

It was weird by then I could feel the baby moving and felt more as though it was me and the baby against the world - you don't feel that in the early part of pregnancy but later on it seems more "real".

I sat there crying and gagging with every tablet (at one point I was taking about 12 a day). But themidwives and nurses were AMAzING because they could see that I was 1. Genuinely seriously upset and 2. Trying my hardest to do the right thing!

I have had 5 other children since then and countless tablets and if I'm honest I still hate them BUT I don't get upset now I have proved to myself I can do it.

You will be the same. You CAN refuse needles that is your right, and it may be fine but equally you may put your child at risk . That's your choice however, show people that you WANT help and they will almost always be there!

we see a lot of women with issues with needles. They just get over it
I think that was pretty much the response I got from them 17 years ago so I see that nothing has changed there then.

I think one HCP said something like - "Well you got yourself pregnant so you have to suffer the consequences".

I was young and scared and being spoken to like that wasn't at all helpful.

I'm sorry but the only person who has to 'weigh up the risk' is you.

This is so true. OP seems to be of the assumption that she will tell them: I want a sedative or I am not having the tests and your head be it if I don't have them because you wont sedate me.

Quite the contrary.

What will actually happen is they will tell her: you are not having a sedative, on YOUR head be it, if you wont have the tests.

The consequences to them of not doing the tests are zero. It is on the OPs head entirely is she wont have them.

Tough love, OP. You will figure it out, but you do need to take some responsibility for attempting to deal with it yourself. My own father had the most severe needle and blood phobia I have ever seen - vomiting and fainting at the slightest speck of blood, days of shaking and not eating before anything involving an injection. Then he developed diabetes in his late 60s, and as well as all the various tests, had to deal with testing his own blood and administering insulin injections. And yes, it involved some serious steeling of himself at the beginning, but he did get past his extreme phobia surprisingly quickly. To the point where, a few years ago, he had an unexpected major bleed at home after a prostate operation (did too much too soon), he just jumped in the car and got himself to A and E, cool as a breeze. I am very admiring, because I know how much guts it took initially.

People have made good suggestions on here - start exploring them, and try not to pass on the phobia to your child as he or she matures. (I say this in sympathy, because i have a phobia I'm working hard on not transmitting to mine.) Good luck!

HCP here.

PP are right in that actually it's you who makes the choice if you have injections or blood tests. Nobody is going to hold you down and make you have a blood test or a vaccination but they are going to make sure you understand the reason we offer them and that you are happy with the potential consequences of declining. It sounds like for you, in the past those consequences have been preferable - and that's ok!! Your choice.

However childbirth is a total unknown. You could have a trouble free, needle free pregnancy and birth and have no problems whatsoever. Or you could get to labour and want an epidural or need a spinal or an IV for whatever reason, or need a CS. You would still be within your rights to decline all of these things... again, it's not legal to force you to do anything even if it hurts the baby.

You might want to approach this thought in a calm state of mind though when you're not so panicked but: if you have a CS even with a general anaesthetic you will need needles. If you have any kind of operative delivery you'd need needles. If you bleed post birth you will need needles. There is no other option. So for your own peace of mind you really should start considering some coping strategies for 'just in case'. Hypnotherapy and CBT are a good idea but you need to want to do them.

It sounds like it's more a medical phobia in its entirety than just needles. I would say- register with GP and then get referred. Make sure they put extreme medical and needle phobia on the referral form. Please don't downplay it. If your unit is any good they will take it as a flag that they can start getting you some proper support because while at first your post reads really 'poor me', actually what is coming through is abject panic and inability to see a pathway through how to manage this, so you're just throwing up your hands in horror and catastrophising.

I am similar. I refused all tests that weren't essential, any pain relief during childbirth which involved needles as well as the post birth jab to assist with placenta delivery.

However, for the sake of the baby I did 'allow' 1 blood test and the whooping cough jab, so not too bad.

It's also worth bearing in mind, however, that you don't always have the control you would like. After my first birth I had complications, needed an op and they gave me an epidural for that. On the plus side, the level of stress kept my blood pressure high enough to avoid a GA despite a LOT of blood loss. However it hasn't changed anything, I still hate needles and certainly haven't got over it. I just had to grit my teeth and do what I needed to do in am emergency. It was just one of those things, but worth trying to prepare yourself because there may be reasons that an anaesthetic is needed if it doesn't go according to plan.

On a more comforting note, i managed second birth at home without even a needle in sight. Midwives asked about prescribing pethidine but was confident I'd rather have the pain than the needles and it was just fine. Would definitely do it again!! And the home birth team regularly see women who are trying to avoid the needles and other medical interventions so they were very understanding and sympathetic about it. Don't let your first contact out you off too much, if the worst comes to the worst you can always ask to be transferred to a more sympathetic individual if your midwife isn't understanding.

Practically, be willing to talk to me about options for sedatives
I am sorry sweetie but I very much doubt that any doctor is going to give you a sedative whilst you are pregnant so they can give you a blood test.

If you don't mind me asking, what exactly are you scared of with needles, is it seeing the needles and blood or is it the feeling?

I did used to be terrified of needles and the ladies at the blood testing centre were really good about making sure that I couldn't see any of the needles or blood when I got a blood test.

Luckily for me I am not so scared any more but the reason why is because I broke my back in an accident and I was in so much pain and had such bad nausea during my six week hospital stay that I was practically begging them for injections all the time to get rid of the pain and nausea.

I definitely would not recommend this as a way of getting over your needle phobia.

You don't HAVE to have the blood tests. Do you know what blood type your OH is? Might rule out any kind of rhesus difficulties if he is RH-negative (my OH is handily). Do you know what blood type you are? Do you know if you had all of the relevant vaccinations at the appropriate age? If you can manage to have transabdominal scans (so just the scanner on your tummy, not the probe) then with a bit of luck you won't need any injections at all. Read up a bit on what the blood tests are and you can make an assessment about how important you feel they are. Frankly you don't have to book in or have any medical care at all, although it's seen as a bit of a red flag by GPs and social services and it is illegal not to notify a birth.

On the other hand, I loathe needles (not scared, just make me feel queasy and vomit occasionally) and by the time I'd been in labour for twelve hours I couldn't have given the tiniest of fucks about the needles (and there were many) I just wanted the baby out and alive and for the pain to stop. You might feel differently in a few weeks, so I would just give yourself a bit of time before you try to book in.

You have to take responsibility for yourself I'm afraid. It's not really up to the NHS to pander to your needs, you either accept the treatment or you don't but it will be you putting your baby at risk not the midwife / doctor.

Why don't you do some of the things other posters have suggested to try and help ease / get over your phobia?

What blood group are you and your DH?
Blood tests are not optional because of things like you and your DP having different RH statuses. You cannot take the risk of not having these tests.

Teddy - if there are any problems she may need an injection or a blood test. It will be too late by then to get some hypnotherapy / CBT /counselling.

Please don't try to convince the Op that's she doesn't need to address this issue, for her own sake as well as her baby's .