Staying posifrickentive- Thread 11 for ladies pg after mc

[LynseyH]

New thread!! The other one closed down!

Yay for dino and kate. Great news for you both!

I've just booked a gender scan 🙄 one week from tomorrow we will know what our little one is and also breaks up the wait until my 20 wk scan! So excited.

Thinking of you loz xx

Couldn't get an earlier scan (booked for Sunday). Got midwife appt this morning so will share concerns. I think I just need to wait it out to be honest. See what happens. No more so far.

Thank you both waiting for gp now, so will update later but fearing the worst (tbh didn't get my hopes up so feel ok - well not ok but prepared for it I would have be more surprised if things were ok tbh).

Waiting for scans is the worst purple, fingers crossed for Sun x x

Hope the midwife can help Purple, they may refer you to EPU.

Hope that it's not bad news Loz & GP can refer.

I woke up at 4am with some stretching pains & Ive popped! Absolutely amazed, can really feel movements more now so placenta really must be in a different place.

Hope everyone else is doing okay. Nausea has faded so hoping that's it for a bit. Using the cleaning hormones to good use & keep decluttering, OH is amazed at how tidier the house looks.

I am waiting for epu to ring Gp is going to arrange a scan, she was quite positive and spotting has stopped which is surprising cos I had to dash to gp's from school so thought I would make it worse, waiting is crap

I feel for you Loz, waiting for a routine scan is bad enough but waiting with worry hanging over you is just soul destroying.
I've got my fingers crossed for you.

Purple any news on getting an earlier scan? Xx

Thank you booked in for Friday, if it is bad news I don't really fancy being left to deal with it over the weekend but what can u do xxx

My memory is terrible Loz how far gone are you again and have you had any scans in this pg yet, have you got any children already x

I am or should b 7 weeks today and I have a 6 yo ds who is blissfully unaware of what is going on x x

No update from me. Midwife appt went find, she was quite reassuring and said I could phone the EPU. To be honest I feel like I don't want to know just yet. I've taken so much time out of work for the different Appts that I think I'll wait until Sunday. Mentally I'm trying to prepare myself for the worst.

Thinking of you both purple and loz... Keeping fingers X

We are a few days apart then Loz.
6 is a lovely age, babies still but little grown ups when they want to be.
Like I've always been told brown spotting that stays brown or tails off is not something they worry about.
I've only ever had any time of spotting in MC but so so so many of my friends have been spotters, I think there should be more text saying that it's a common normal thing on pregnancy, I think that we see a spot and we just go into fear mode when I think realistically it's probably so many times completely harmless.
I do envy those woman who have no idea of all the things that could potentially could wrong and blissfully glide through their pregnancies with singing birds and flowing white dresses lolol 😂😂

20 week scan done and everything looks as it should! Celebrated by buying little socks and bibs.
Just to say, In case this helps anyone, ive been driving myself nuts about movement and kicks. We saw baby kicking on the monitor and I couldn't feel it but it was still happening. Doctor said it is still in the early days for feeling movements, patterns etc and not to worry.

Good luck for Monday lucky

Bec you are right, but even though we know it's common I think once you have had a loss it's never quite the same.

6 is a funny age sometimes they are like teenagers others they still act like toddlers x

Good news on the scan Mac x

Well done Macauley! You should throw caution to wind and start planning ahead prams and cribs and cute little outfits!

One of my daughters has just turned 8 and she is an animal lol
She was really rude to her and dad and point blank refused to go to her room so he took her by the arm with one hand and turned her shoulder with the other (so as to be heading in the right direction lol) and she said "get off my body, I don't give you permission to touch my body!!!!
We where in hysterics but now my husband won't lay a finger on her, he's says god imagine if the neighbours overhear her saying stuff like that 😂😂😂 Bless him, he's tortured by her now, she's a proper little witch and she knows it.

Really pleased to read your news Mac, congratulations on clearing another major milestone! Thanks also for sharing about seeing kicks and not feeling anything, I'm the same as you and wondering what's baby and what's ordinary body functions still. I think I am picking up movements sometimes but they're so subtle!

Great news about scan xxxBec this one shoukd stick

Thank you flourishing xxxxxxxxxxx

Hi all. Great news on your scan mac!
I hope your ok loz and purple.

Totally exhaustion today so sorry if I've missed anyone.
Oh yes, xxbec! congrats too!

Had a very emotional week, I think I've had a surge of hormones and I'm crying so much. Starting to wonder if I need to go back to the mental health midwife. Mostly the stuff I mentioned before with my family that has brought me down, just feel so hurt.
I'm making sure I'm going to bed earlier now we're on the school run again but this week with 4yr old just starting school, he's on half days and 3 yr old is doing full days at nursery so I'm doing trips there, morning, noon and home time. I don't drive and I'm shattered! Thank God eldest son gets a school bus!
I'm amazed you ladies are coping with this and working too. You must be super women!

On top of everything going else, I feel the urge to go to the toilet at least 3/4 times a day but can't actually go. Grrr!

Your doing really well Lynsey, you have a lot to contend with, pg and 3 kids and 2 of which are still babies themselves.
Crying is like weeing in pregnancy they go hand in hand, you do equally the same amounts of both lol
I currently do the same thrice there and back school journeys and it's a nightmare some days and my school is only at the end of my street so I totally understand where ur coming from with that, it kind of hinders you for doing anything else in the day as you have to stay within proximity to the school.
Your family are exactly the same as mine, I'm very taken for granted an everybody I know loves me and treasures me except for my family, my friends are now my family that I have chosen, I still have dealings with them but I try to keep my business to myself so as they can't sit back and talk about me as I'm sure they do.
How is your support network lyns? Have you good friends you can lean on a little right now?
You know your own body and if you think that your sadness and worry is more than is normal for you, (I can always tell when I'm depressed as I look forward to bed time!) then definetly speak to the midwife and see if she can offer some extra support.
As hard as it is you need to take some time for yourself and I find that the easiest way for me to do that is to get all the things I need to do in the house done then have a sit down and write lists of all the things I feel like I need to do, I.e get the hubby to paint the stairs etc and that way you feel like you are taking some control over the world around you and it's empowering.
Also when you start seeing things around you moving in the direction you want it too it may help you relax and feel like your not spiralling.
I'm always here for you xxxxx

Thank you for such a lovely message xxbec.
I don't have a support network at all really. I talk to my dad a lot but only phone now when I know my mum is at work. The one decent friend I thought I had didn't like my partner so stayed away. It's now been months since we spoke. As I'm not living in my home town, all my friends I grew up with live an hour away and aren't good at keeping in touch, I kinda gave up too as I felt it was one sided.

Partners family are even worse than my own! His mum is easily the most horrible person I have ever met.
I have done a bit of hoovering and now just laying on sofa (again!!) until I am back to school. I look forward to my bed anyway lol so no difference there. Next week should be more settled and I have booked myself in to the hairdressers to have some me time.
It was lovely (but also very sad) that I told my sons nursery about my scan and that we are having a girl and they were so happy for me, more than people that should care. It was hugs all round.
Thank you again for taking the time to write such a caring message. Same goes, always around for a chat if I'm needed xxxx

i don't really bother with the other half a family either, very snipey people. Friendly to your face then all talk about you, even when they have no reason to. I'm a bit too out spoken for there liking, my husband was always a jack the lad type and nobody had her took his heart till I came along. I love my life with the attitude that no matter how much I care for somebody if they can live without me then I'll sure as hell live without them lol, that's what made him fall for me, I didn't fall drooling at his feet like all the other gf's before me, and they hate that about me lol they would love me to be his little robot but that's not me, it hasn't happened in 19 years we've been married or will any time soon!
Now the little ones in nursery can't you take a bit of time to start getting to know some of the other mums, see if there's anybody that's a bit of you?
I always think friendship is like dating, you've got to try out different people and see who you like the most lol
Fuck anyone who doesn't appreciate your good heart and keep close those who you find who will love you warts and all. Xx

Found you !!!!
Bfp yesterday. Had mmc 16 months ago - saw heartbeat on an early scan at 5 weeks then 2 days before 12 week scan started bleeding and ended up in A&E with labour like pain. Scan showed heart had stopped at 9 weeks.

I don't even know what to feel this time - feel numb ! Convinced it's going to go wrong again - don't even feel it's worth asking for an early scan as it won't mean everything's ok.

Feel like i'm in limbo ??

Wow just slept solidly for an hour. Needed that! I do try and talk to others but I do find it quite hard as I'm quite a quiet person until I know someone.
I sat with one of the mums earlier and we had a quick chat about the kids but as for common ground, I don't think there really is any. I need people who I can talk to like I would on here, I'm open and honest, it's all I expect in return too. I tend to go for older friends as I find them more genuine, people younger tend to be more bitchy. It's tough!
I don't want to fill this thread up with my moans and groans though! Sorry ladies for hijacking the thread! But xxbec you've really made me smile today and I needed it!
I don't think it should matter if your loud or not etc, if your a genuine person, that's all that matters. (I said to my dad last night I'm so fed up of being treated like an idiot, maybe I should just be a bitch too and he told me never to change who I am :-)) ...I know he couldn't say the same to my sister and now I'm not crying, I can feel a little sense of happiness from that. (Haha in your face sister hehe).

Ladies I hope your all having a good day x

Sorry adventure cross posted.

Can honestly say your in a good place here with lots of ladies to talk too.
We know exactly how you feel and to put it simply, it sucks. Limbo seems to be a common feeling for all of us but keep talking to us and we'll try keep you sane :-)
Congratulations on your pregnancy and lots of handholds here for when you need them x