Pregnant at forty and over - thread 3

[Marquand]

To continue support for mothers to be over 40.

Very quiet on here. Where are the oldies others ?

A sober xmas with no cheese - well some lol - but wouldn't have it any knee way 👶🏼💓👶🏼

Hi all, 24+3 today. Just had whooping cough vaccine.
All well here, baby is very bouncy at the moment, particularly likes bed time!
We're surprisingly all ready for Christmas. Just a few carols to play tomorrow and baking to do. Relax!

I am not too fussed about booze on the whole but at lunch with friends last weekend there was an amazing seafood platter with a delicious Chablis. I really wanted that Chablis (might have had 1/4 glass... ). I really only miss wine with a special meal. Although I did miss having a Madeira when wrapping presents and watching Miracle on 34th Street - an annual tradition with my sister.

Cheese. Sigh.

I also wouldn't have it any other way though.

I am 13+3 now and starting to feel really rather fat. My middle portion is looking thicker, although I am not really showing as such. Might be all the crunchy nut cornflakes and not baby!

Nice to see some others dropping in. Merry Christmas all!

also had whooping c jab today, arm is sore, was ouch :(

no wonder babies cry

flu didnt hurt and i jab daily due to dvt and thats fine but this hurt

booze really doesnt bother me, and dont have a problem with other preg people having odd drink, but im not, its taken so long to get bubs that i feel in my brain and heart (even tho not true) but if i had a drink/ate pate etc and something happened to bubs i would always think what if i hadnt had ......

friends are amazed im not even having one was i that much of a pisshead .......

i miss goats cheese more

I know what you mean - I will probably have a teeny glass of something 2 or 3 times in my pregnancy (based on last time) but I won't take any risk with cheese, pate or seafood etc as it would only take one dodgy mussel and it could be quite catastrophic. Like you I know I would never forgive myself.

I had the flu jab when I had booking appt with Gp but didn't know there was a whooping cough jab - is that offered as standard?

Yes mw should tell you about it - and done ideally 24-32 weeks

So if had flu done early you wouldn't have been offered this

Just ring gp and make an app for it

How many weeks are you?

Immunes you and baby and then baby has another at 8w etc

Morning all!
Hope you're feeling nice and Christmassy. At least we can revel in the lack of festive hangovers for the first time in decades

18+5 today and still feeling sick which is unbelievably boring now! I'm functional but queasy all day.
Did have a lovely early private anomaly scan on Thursday and all looked good so far. He looked very cute already (on the normal screen...4-d is terrifying!), so I'm forgiving him the never ending nausea...just!

Have felt movement now for a good 3 weeks, just flutters to begin with and now really noticeable and fairly constant. I'm an un-curvy tiny frame though so guess there's not much cushioning. It was nice to understand which bits of him I can feel and where on the scan- mostly his knees at the moment, quite high near my belly button.

Nice to hear you're all enjoying Xmas prep. We're driving to the West Country today to get spoilt rotten by his parents- I've bought one of those seat belt adaptors to pull the bottom belt under the bump so all I need to worry about now (apart from his driving) is not throwing up in the car

I must confess I really miss drinking! I'm a lightweight anyway but love the ritual when cooking, eating, etc.
On the cheese tip, I've been absolutely hammering it down...Big time craving. Even had a whole block for dinner recently, with a few grapes in the side as a concession. If it's pasteurised and with no molded rind or veining, it's in. I've gone off really strong cheddars but love all those mountain cheeses.
Found a goats cheese Gouda in Waitrose blondes, if that's any help?! And as far as I understand, young pastuerused goats cheeses like the supermarket tubs of chavroux are fine, or have I got that horribly wrong?!!

Last topic on my epic post (sorry)
Anyone else finding the sofa more comfortable than bed?! It should be the other way around back-wise, but my new routine is start in bed, wake with back pain or calf cramp, and relocate to sofa for a pain and cramp free sleep! Dp thinks I'm more in love with the sofa than him.

Enjoy your days everyone

Hi all
Been lurking for a while but with a week until my 20w scan for my first pregnancy I'm getting nervous and seeking a little reassurance.
Lots of symptoms - boobs are still v sore (especially in the cold!!) and feeling nauseous a lot - but despite hearing heartbeat and seeing movement at 16w I have a persistent worry that I should be feeling/sensing more.
When should I expect to feel movement/see a bump of some sort? BMI is high, but am actually losing weight rather than gaining (prob due to all day sickness)
I'm rattling at the moment with aspirin, multi vita, fish oil, cyclazine and something else (another anti-emetic) and just feeling a bit low and impostery.

mightymouse my sofa is most uncomfy on planet. If I didn't like it before I fell pg I despise it now. So tempted to buy another right now (or one of those electric recliners my grandfather has! )

Teaspoon when you have a high bmi you can struggle to feel the baby early on. 19w is still early so don't panic too much. It can also depend on the position of the placenta (I don't remember if it's at back or front that cushions feeling kicks) - early on movement can feel more like bubble popping or gentle waves lapping rather than kicks and bumps.

So I'm 13w and the cramping has returned. I'm hoping it's just a growth spurt and being Xmas I'm unlikely to be seen for cramping anyway.

Hope Xmas is a good one for you all. I'm dreading it as my family are food obsessed and I still can't eat anything, even although the sickness and nausea has been slightly better.

Thanks Bloop
You too - hope it gets better!
X

Teaspoon. Welcome and I felt first def kick at 26w and fluttetings butterflies for 5/6w before so 20ish weeks. Also plump cuddly and bubs liked to curl round my tummy and hide so bump varies

This time next year we will be mummies 👶🏼💓👶🏼

Hello! Just checking in. Welcome Teaspoon. I also have high bmi, about 30 when I fell pregnant, but was a bit higher last time I think. I felt fluttering movement from around 18 weeks but DH couldn't feel anything externally until about 22 weeks. I think it varies loads though. I also didn't feel it often until after 24isb weeks, when baby was bigger and stronger.

Well, I didn't enjoy Xmas day very much. I had too much to do, cooked the whole turkey roast and then literally couldn't eat any of it. Mostly grazed on nuts and crisps . And I was mopping the kitchen floor at mighnight so DS doesn't track turkey grease all over the house today. Was just a bit of a slog really!

Cold cuts and mash today, much more palatable and less work. And I am currently having a lie in but about to get up. V hungry this morning!

Teaspoon thank you for posting! I too have been lurking and looking for a comment just like yours as despite this being my 4th baby (I am 19 +1 and turned 40 in November) I have been mega nervous this time (don't remember being such a worry wart with my previous pregnancies - could it be the constant reminders from medical profession that I am over 38?!!) I have expected to feel more definite movement earlier as that's what they say with subsequent pregnancies but this baby is very quiet (possibly cause I am very busy?!) I do think that how baby is positioned and how busy we are is also very relevant and the fact that this is my 4th and he/she is pretty quiet will hopefully give you some reassurance that it is still early days and most likely in another 8+ weeks you will be posting about elbows and knees under your ribs at night Have a wonderful, sober, pasteurised cheesy Christmas everyone!

Thanks Blondes - really helpful!

Christmas - sounds draining! Hope today is a bit better!! Just don't overdo it.

Ollypea - wow. Props for going through the physical and emotional turmoil there times already!! How do your other three feel about the bump?

Bloop and Christmas,
Hope you're both feeling better today.
Standard nausea here, but about to try a sausage roll for good measure.

Hi teaspoon and Olly
Olly we're bang on the same dates, I'm 19+1 today also, and turned 40 at the end of September... similar with the exception of me being a total, clueless beginner!!!
Teaspoon you sound very close in dates too- what day is your 20 week scan? Mine is late at almost 21 weeks on the 6th Jan (hence me getting a private one last week to stop me going crackers with worry).

I hope you're both feeling calm and good today.

I am overall still bouncing between tearful anxiety about something going wrong (heightened if I'm tired), and rising excitement and feelings of loving him already which I wasn't expecting at all. I'm certainly very highly emotional, which is a weird contrast to my normal balanced pragmatism. Cried in front of family/friends 3 times yesterday, all before lunch... good effort!

Hey Mightymouse
My DD is 16/5 and my 20w is on Weds 28/12. Excited/ wary - feels like a big milestone. Can totally understand why you've had a private one done rather than wait!!

Oh, and totally understand the hormonal teary thing. Spent much of today watching (well, background) DIYSOS and tearing up frequently!!

Ha! DIYSOS used to make me crack before I was pregnant, to be fair

Gawd, I just cried at the bake off (last ever on the Beeb) - the bit after the credits where they summed up the show and said thanks.

And I cried watching some of the footage of /tributes for George Michael today.

And I cried when someone sent me a nice Christmas message in a card.

And I cried.... you get the picture! I have told DH just to let me get on with it. I quite enjoy it if I don't feel 'watched'!

Hello Ladies,

Again feeling relieved to read that I am not alone. Went for a walk yesterday, listening to hard core dance music (90s chic!) and started to blub for no apparent reason...all manor of things can set me off at the moment but not necessarily the typical emotional stuff 🤔

Teaspoon I am possibly insane and to be honest #4 is as big a surprise at 40 as #1 was at 23!! But what a nice way to round off the family and it certainly took all the focus off turning 40 as I was feeling pretty rough up to my 14th week so no time to dwell on impending doom of ageing 😱 ! Also my three although same nucleus family which many are surprised at these days are not close in age. They will be 16.5, 9 and 5.5 when baby arrives in May so lots of help - I hope 😉!

Mightymouse we live in France and so the system is more 'medical' here (#1 was born in the UK albeit over 16 years ago - 😊 The system here is to be gyne lead and there is a scan every 4 weeks from 9-weeks right through and every week in last couple of weeks. A little too intrusive for some but does offer regular peace of mind if you don't mind the very direct approach of constantly reminding you of all risks/possible anomalies up to my last scan and bloods when everything came back with flying colours...amazing the difference 5 years makes in pre-natal terms as did not have nearly the same level of reference to age and risk at 34 for #3!

Teaspoon have you felt any bubbling/popping wriggling? All still very quiet here with only mildest of flutters when I eventually stop for the day...I am sitting here thinking that maybe he/she will enjoy a few Quality Streets (tin open and beginning to be eaten in front of me 😂!

Wishing you all a relaxing and not too emotional day 😄

P.S. Had problems with Emojis not sure if you can see them?!

I see the 😂😍😱👶🏼😇

All good here. Bubs def more active in eve and kicking and quiet daytime

2 days of sick free 😷😷😃😃 tho lost xmas dinner on 25th

Bit of a panic - Couldn't feel bubs Move last night after I posted

Worried about it all night. Went to My local HOSP early am and been monitored and heart beat loud and strong and moving via monitor

Never cried so much. Thought we had lost bubs - she's being a pickle

Saw lovely senior midwife who said come in whenever / they are there for us 24hrs

Almost got told off. She said I should have called them /gone in last night

She said call anytime if preg but even more so if infertility /older /high risk as I am

They will never say we are wasting their time etc

So morel of story ladies is please call mat triage if any worries

Blondes so glad you're ok. I can't believe the stress and anxiousness wrapped up with baby making!

Olly I thought I could feel fluttering a couple of weeks ago (around 18w) but consultant just said "no, too early, probably wind"! Keep trying to step back and figure out whether I can distinguish between old age aches, baby growing stretches, and anything else. All v tricky

Bloop hope the nausea has eased a bit. I managed to keep stuff down yesterday (result!!) and am trying to eat slower, not too late, not too oily, etc etc to figure out what my triggers are. Good luck!!

And Mighty & Christmas - gawd, the tears?!?! Went to see Rogue One yesterday (not great, IMHO) and cried when a bloody robot died!!! Then again on the trip home. Crazy

Off to hossie now for my scan son have a great day everyone and keep them crossed for me. Xx

tea was awful. To get this far and then lose bubs. I wouldn't be able to cope

But she is fine. Just being a pain. She likes to curl round my stomach so not lots of movement but heart fine

Got emergency scan tomorrow to measure and show position but hearing heart today has reassured me

Hope your 20w scan brings reassurence and all measurements ok abd. It a hider in front as mine was and that you find out sex if you want to know

Hey all. Think I've only posted once on this thread! Am now 11 weeks and trying to remain positive about everything going okay.. saw MW and she said I may see a consultant at some point, but my being 42 and this being my 5th, apparently doesn't concern them much, which is reassuring.
I'm not feeling particularly pregnant, just a bit fed up! I will be relieved if I make it through this first trimester and all is OK.