Pregnant at forty and over - thread 2

[cloudjumper]

To continue the support for those of us who are pregnant at forty and over.

dats thanks, she's very rude!!

nicky - congratulations! Very exciting and good news. Glad it was all ok.

shabby - what a rude colleague! I think you handled it well!

Interesting discussion on how people reacted. I have started telling people now (14 weeks). Some people suspected (people I usually drink with!) but others shocked and pleased. I am worried about telling work next week the most. And a friend who I know has been trying - that will be difficulty any advice on how to handle that one?

Rugby 2 friends became pregnant when I was trying, one not planned, one had tried for longer than me. They told me because it was good news, mentioned they knew I was trying and hoped it would happen for me so as well. Although I was (secretly) envious I was truly happy for them, in reality if they could do it, so could I! I looked upon Conceiving as 'catching'- hopefully your friend will too. Good luck, how lovely for your friend to have a good friend like you who's thinking about her feelings too. She'll be pleased for you . And work HAVE to be ok, and tbh it's a happy time, they will be I'm sure!

shabby - thanks for the tip about my friend, your kind comments, and also the perspective on work. I am sure you're right.

Rugby everyone reacts differently LTTTC, last time round I had 2 LTTTC friends, one fortunately managed to get pregnant before I needed to say I was dreading telling her at 16weeks. The other I told on email, arrangements for meal out and I'll drive as I'm pregnant, my thinking was she got the info in private without any expectation of congratulations except she skimmed over that bit.

I was ttc for 4 long years, some announcements (esp 2nd babies) had me putting on a brave face. Was completely in bits just a couple of months after a loss when I got a very unsympathetic "hello I'm pregnant (and due just after you would have been)"

I think I would prefer to get it via text or email give her time to deal with emotions before facing you.

mrsebear sending hugs - I got a bit teary reading your post and remembering how I felt when we were trying- the longing and the all consuming thoughts about it. So sad you had a loss and so glad you're expecting a wonderful little baby now xx

Thankyou for hugs. I'm lucky that I have DS but I think it must be horrible to be LTTTC your first.

I can barely believe that I am having another little person. I worry how DS will take to it but it will do him the world of good

Welcome April, I'm sure there is somebody else on here with a similar big gab. Although I had to reread your post first time I thought you were talking 19 & 25 mths .
How have your kids taken to the news?
You must be due at Christmas too

Welcome and congratulations April, glad you found the thread .

Also new here, 44 and 9 weeks pregnant with DC2 (DD is 2.5 years). Had DD at 41 so been old mum before but this one feels really old! Just looking for some support and a friendly hello in these nerve-wracking early weeks!

Hi everyone, I'm 44 (45 next week) and pregnant for the first time. DH has two grown up children already (21 and 22) and we are telling them next week.... not sure how they'll react. Baby is due in Oct. Just been to my first consultant appoint where they confirmed I'll be induced if I go over by a day. All due to my advanced age of course. This is the first real anxiety to deal with tbh, as pregnancy so far has been ok apart from the tiredness and panting to get up the stairs.

Welcome bluebird, jolly and april. Wow I really admire people who have grown up children doing it again. Well done! So happy for you all.

I told a friend who is ttc today. It was a bit tough. I wish I knew what to say. I hope it won't make us drift apart but I know how I felt when all my friends were telling me about their pregnancies a couple of years ago. I just wanted to focus on something else. Anyway.

April that's fab news! Yay!

Hi all. Well I told my kids last weekend and try daughter was thrilled but my son was a bit quiet. My hubby spoke to him and he said he was quite excited really. So that made me happier. My daughter wants to come to all my appts so that's nice.
I told my manager too as I am a nurse and have to do a lot of Collecting patients from theatres and was worried about things. She was shocked haha. But has been great. Asks me every day how I am.
So all good here.
April I'm pleased things went well for you too xx

Hi ladies
Good that the grown up kids have taken it well.

I really want to hang on to my news for another few weeks, until after 12 week scan, which isn't booked although I am 11 weeks now. However I have a hen do next weekend, bride 👰 to be is a nurse and a friend is a pharmacist. Any really good excuse's not to drink?

It's not the right time to share it with DH family, an adopted child has just joined the family its their moment don't want to spoil it for them. My family will start with words of wisdom and seeing problem's that may or may not exist, how are you going to cope with xxx?

mellie and april - so glad your families have taken the news well. Even getting automatic babysitters- that's great! It must be a relief.

mrebear - hmmm I don't have many excuses apart from the usual antibiotics or feeling unwell ones. Could do 'had a bender last night' but that would prob not work before a hen do! Perhaps the antibiotics could be for a UTI and you could keep going to the loo!?!

Sounds like you are being very sensitive with your OH's family. What makes you feel your family will see problems? That sounds very difficult.

Why has your NHS not got you a scan date yet? How annoying. I hope you it soon.

My "babysitter" will be six and a half when her (second) little brother arrives, and she is super excited about her duties as an older sister. I'm not sure if I need to worry a bit! We have friends whose baby is now 5 months, and she carries her around everywhere. I'm worried that she believes she can do the same with a newborn!

All well with the pregnancy, but I'm very fed up. I've been sick for nearly two months, and even nearly two weeks off work and a course of antibiotics haven't made a dent. I remain the queen of coughs & snot. Now 31 weeks. Terror bitch from hell boss is not helping either.

I went to a youngish and inexperienced GP on Wednesday. She detected some protein in my urine, high BP, and freaked out. She sent me off to the antenatal ward at the hospital, where BP was normal and no protein was found in the blood. All well, except I needed to go back for a sick note!

Hi everyone,
Congratulations on all the BFPs 😊
I'm 40 next month and just found out im 5 weeks pregnant after 4 years of IVF. Going for my internal scan on Wednesday. Nervous and excited! Not sure what they'll be able to tell me?!
Does anyone have any tips on being a pregnant contractor?! I'm so tired and feeling rough I've had two weeks off already and boss doesn't know I'm pregnant. dont think I have any employee rights and finding a new contract will be so hard now. Need the money though! Any advice much appreciated! x

Congratulations mitsy- I'm afraid I have no advice on contractors, but I am sure someone here will have.

I told work today - which was a relief as I was walking around holding a folder in front of me all morning as I think it is quite obvious now.

Bit of a scare this morning, I'd had reduced movements last night and overnight. At 25+4 I'd been having really strong regular movements and from yesterday evening time he went quiet and I only had a few very soft movements all night. I tapped tummy, spoke to him, played music in tummy, drink hot and cold, wandered around, lied still.... Nothing would Make him move more so I called triage at 7 this morning. Booked in to be monitored at 9 and luckily by them he'd started to love a bit more. Monitored for a while and he moved, has strong heartbeat and is now acting normal. Phew! I almost felt like a fraud going I when he'd started to move again but the midwives were wonderful and told me to call anytime if it happens again. Also got blood pressure and urine done so feeling good! I'm so glad I called them, I would have been worrying all day, even with him moving.