40+ and pregnant? Come and join the fun!

[cloudjumper]

I am 43 and currently pg with DC2, due early January. I thought it would be nice to have a thread for the pregnant ladies of 'older vintage', similar to the 40+ ttc thread, for advice, support and the occasional moan.

brooke, amazing news!! what a relief

eagle, good luck later, and definitely give them hell for what they did to you over the phone!

Blooming, what a lovely bump!

I'm a lot happier today- conference speech is out of the way (until the next one- although today's was definitely the most challenging of the calendar, and the first one I have ever had to do pregnant, so PHEW!). Also, my spotting has stopped, thank goodness. Just need to try to get some sleep now so that I can enjoy tomorrow's scan!

Oh yes, I nearly forgot, I started my disprin today. I was actually supposed to start it last week but forgot. I am a wee bit dubious about me being put on this for no reason other than 'you'll be 40' but on the basis that in such low quantities it's unlikely to shred my stomach, I am willing to go along with it.

Evening - knackered after spending evening in heavy traffic driving to hosp then more rainy heavy traffic to get home again!

Scan went well - baby has grown to match dates exactly (am now 12+4) and nuchal fold good (1.5 I think). Also fed back re phone call - turns out there was something on my notes to say I was in an open plan office and the secretary made the call so probably some sort of miscommunication. Emphasised the fact that although it was good news, it was kind of irrelevant as I was in a state anyway!

Wanted to write more but got to go to bed so will just wave feebly and look on in awe at anyone who has the energy to go to a hen do, party, conference or holiday.

I did get invited to a gig tomorrow eve (on the guest list for a fairly well known, long-standing band) but I just don't have the strength so have declined in favour of an exciting evening in bed...

Congrats on your scans Eagle & brooke - that's great news!

Great scan news, eagle and Brooke!

Thanks all! Still in a daze

Great news eagle

Good luck for today citymole

Hi all. Just catching up on the thread, I'm rooting for you all and it's lovely to hear your good news. I'm hoping to be back legitimately in the NY!

Fantastic scan news Eagle and Brooke.

Moon I hope the Harmony test gives you positive reassurance, hopefully you won't have to wait too long.

Cloud could I ask you what brand of DHEA you took and how much? How long did you take it for? I've resisted taking it in the past because of potential side effects but might give it a go. How did you get on with it?

Great news about your scans Brooke and Eagleray

I still thinking about you moon and hoping that your Harmony results don't take too long.

All fine here. Starting to feel more normal and less nauseous which is good I am sure my bump has grown and moved a bit in the last week. It felt quite prominent when I was laying in bed this morning. I am enjoying having a proper bump I don't have to hide

Good luck with your scan tomorrow citymole

Ababs I took DHEA for about 3 months, which was the recommended length (when not having medical supervision). The recommended dose is 3x 25mg per day, but I usually only took it twice a day, simply because I tended to forgot to take it with me to work most of the time I will have to look up where I got it from - I remember that it should be micronized for better absorption, and there was only one place that's old that form at the time, might be worth googling it... I'll try and find it.

Hi all - hope you are all doing well!

brooke so pleased to read the news that your scan went well! So good after all your worry, you must be relieved :)

eagle glad your scan went well too - I do wonder why you have to have two though, if you have already had the positive news from your harmony blood test?

Thanks for the kind thoughts all (sorry if I am missing someone out, but a few messages to catch up on and am only on phone!)

I am ok - luckily on holiday for four days, which should keep my mind on things - I am doing ok at not feeling too much, but I think I am just putting all pregnancy thoughts on hold atm to stay sane :) I have a very understanding boss who is letting me work from home next week, so I don't have the awful dread of getting the news in an open plan office!!

Mooncalf the NHS 12 week scan is for dating and I will opt out of testing.

Also a chance for DP to see the baby although he doesn't seem terribly interested and declined to look at this week's pics

Hope you have a wonderful holiday and so glad you can stay home next week

Hello ladies

I've been lurking on this thread for months, but have finally summoned up enough courage to join in .

I've just turned 43, and I'm 21 weeks today. I had a miscarriage nearly 2 years ago, and was told I was peri-menopausal earlier this year and had we thought about adopting. So, this has been a massive shock, and I've been on tenterhooks all the way through so far.

But..... my Harmony test came back with the lowest risk factor, I had my 20 week scan this week and a consultant appointment today (more later on that one, if anyone's interested!!), so I'm slightly more relaxed. And reading all your brilliant posts has really helped keep me sane over the last weeks - even if no-one realised I was lurking on the fringes!! (Although we're driving my parents mad, because we don't want to tempt fate by letting my mum tell all her random friends whom we've never met.)

So - hello to all of those whom I feel I kinda already know, and good luck to all those waiting test results. If it's any comfort, my first scan gave me a 1:4 for Downs, based on the nuchal, which got better on the soft markers, and was as good as it could be for the Harmony. So I have my fingers crossed for all of you waiting.

hebs welcome! Glad you decided to say hello, it's a really good thread isn't it? Everyone here is very friendly and supportive - it's definitely helping me through the rollercoaster!

Yes def tell us how your consultant appt went - what are they like??

eagle yes not much point having the nhs screening if you've already had the harmony! I thought there were two harmony tests if you had before 12 weeks? Maybe that didn't apply to you though... Brain not entirely at 100% (or even 50%)!

So, wanted to say, I found some excellent mat jeans by red herring - they are under bump, sort of, but basically the stretchy bit is because the pockets are like normal jeans pockets, but made of elastic... Not good explanation, but what it means is they are great for the inbetween stage and don't cut in at all, or have a massive baggy bit that your bump is too small for. They have bootcut and skinny ones. They are sized big though, I'm a 14 usually, and I'm in a 12 (my h&m ones are a16 and still too small!)

hello hebs!

mooncalf, glad you're managing to work from home and keep yourself sane/ as positive as can be.

I had my scan yesterday. Baby had its head burrowed in the very bottom of my uterus, doing a creepy headstand, so all we could see was a little bottom waggling about and bobbing around. It was like one of those bloody twerking dancers on that sexist music video, you know the one.

Anyway, despite being sent away for coffee, cake and a run up the stairs, it refused to move, so the whole expedition was USELESS for getting pictures. Also useless for dating purposes, which was the point of the scan, (but let's be honest, it's also about the cute pictures and seeing that the baby is ok!)

So, we're back two weeks tomorrow for another attempt. I'm not too worried as we have a heartbeat, but you know that kind of feeling of slight dread? Yeah, that.

We also opened up our full harmony results yesterday to reveal the gender (we previously had only looked at the tree trisomy risk results, and had omitted to check the gender). We are having .... drumroll as I suspected from the day I saw those two lines, A BABY BOY! I wasn't remotely bothered either way, but my partner has been hopping around muttering things about his super boy chromosome sperm, while I eyeroll/ ignore him
Anyway, I'm having a really busy time at work which is just absorbing everything and i'm not getting much sleep. I had to work into the early hours last night (my team don't know yet- only my very senior head of dept, so I couldn't even say GUYS, I'M FUCKING PREGNANT AND DYING HERE). tonight is looking like another late one, as we have a big deadline tomorrow. I've just ordered a huge Papa Johns pizza though, so don't feel too sorry for me

Hope everybody else is getting on well and having a great week!

I am off to look out for the pizza man, and then might browse some red herring stuff while I eat my dinner!

Sorry Mooncalf I've had so many scans now it's got a bit confusing! I've had two Harmony-related appointments. At the first one I had a scan to date the pregnancy and they took blood (I was just over 10 weeks). Then at the second appt (at 12 weeks) they did the scan checks (nuchal measurement plus general check of baby) and they also discussed the results, which I'd had by phone a few days earlier.

Prior to Harmony, I had two scans at the hospital which were a bit vague in terms of their reason for happening. They took place at what is called a joint consultation appt where the specialist for my medical condition plus the obstetrician saw me at the same appt to talk about the pregnancy. I think they got me in to establish how far along I was as I wasn't able to tell them (and I take medication that has to be stopped if I ever get pregnant). They couldn't see much at the first scan so then went to repeat appt 2 weeks later where they saw that the pregnancy had progressed. Because I'm not just pregnant, but pregnant with a medical condition which could worsen during pregnancy and also pregnant over 40, it's really hard to tell why decisions are being made or why particular protocols are being followed. Most of the time I just nod and agree unless it's about being induced

The Red Herring jeans sound great! Nobody go near H&M trousers are they are not cut for humans I think

Welcome Hebs - I was told i was perimenopausal earlier this year too. The Downs testing sounds like it was a very worrying time for you - I'm glad Harmony was able to give you reassurance.

Sorry you had a frustrating experience at the scan CityMole - I had similar with DD at the 20 week scan and had to return a couple of weeks later. I think if they're not co-operating on a particular day, there's not much you can do a bit like toddlers really

Congrats on your news citymole! I loved the image of the creepy headstand.

Welcome hebs and big congrats! I'm 42 and 16wks with my first!

Hope everyone is doing well

I had the dating scan today and DP came along as it was his first chance to actually be at a scan this time around. 2yo DD came too as nowhere to leave her and figured she could just sit quietly in the corner with my iphone and she wouldn't even notice what was happening.

When we went in, she played the the phone for about 10 seconds then wanted to sit with me and stroke my face while I lay there. When I lifted up my top she said 'ooh what a big tummy!' but was otherwise fairly uninterested in what was happening and we thought she hadn't really taken in anything.

Until this evening... DP did bedtime and when it was time for her to get into bed, she lay there and produced a random piece of plastic (the lid from her drinks bottle) and asked DP to examine her tummy with it. She was only happy once she'd had about 4 'dating scans'

I fear there will be quite a lot of role play tomorrow at nursery - think it best I warn them...

Hello ladies, I survived holiday followed closely by Halloween hen do. Both were lovely but I'm still exhausted!
Great news re scans Brooke & Eagle.
Welcome Hebs
Any news yet Moon? How are you doing?
I had flu & whooping cough jabs today. No soreness or anything so I hope I've avoided all side effects.
I'm 30 weeks today. Starting to feel that the end is in sight! I bought a crib mattress & a coming home baby outfit yesterday. Very exciting. Hard to find a neutral baby gro though - I couldn't even find plain white!!
How are dd's scans going Eagle? So funny. I love hearing how siblings react to anything baby.
How are you Cloud?
So baby is transverse at the moment, still plenty of time for it to move but is it worth bouncing on a birthing ball? (I assume it's still in the loft somewhere.....)
Waves to everyone, sorry not to name check all - I'm on my phone so hard to go back too far.

Good to hear from you grizzer Neutral baby clothes are like gold dust, it is so frustrating. I found Polarn O Pyret the best for that, however, their clothes are prized like gold dust....
I got my birthing ball out a few weeks ago, simply because I am now struggling to get comfortable on the sofa! Def worth starting to bounce, hope it'll change position.

Welcome hebs! I'm 43 as well, currently 31+4.

Eagle at your DD! Did she say something in nursery?!

We had a nice weekend in Somerset, visiting DH's cousin who has a gorgeous house there. DS had such fun with his little cousin, made me go all soppy.
As for me, I am back in constipation hell. Had my worst episode ever yesterday, and I still feel beaten up from the inside. Won't go into too much detail, but things got well and truly stuck yesterday, and I spent an hour (!) on the loo, trying to get it out The pain was awful, at one point I thought I'm either going to throw up and/or pass out. DH is away on business until Thursday, great timing. Poor DS had to feed the cats and then get himself some dinner, while I sat on the loo and literally could not move. And to add insult to injury, I nearly blocked the toilet
I have made a doctor's appointment for Thursday, I have now tried all the natural remedies, it's time for something with a bit more clout! Hoping the GP will agree, I just cannot cope with this anymore.

Hi guys! Glad the holidayers have survived!

cloudjumper, I hear you, sister. I've felt awful all day with constipation -stomach ache and nausea- and spent over an hour on the loo crying earlier (situation now resolved, but BLOODY HELL, for the love of all that is holy, is this meant to be practise for labour because it sure feels like it.) Lactulose seems to have stopped working. Sob.

Told my team at work yesterday about my pregnancy, and they were more supportive and less like "what, you are joking" than I had feared, so let's see if tHat continues now that I plan to scale back on the late nights in the office a bit, here's hoping.

Got (another) dating scan booked for Friday 13th, same day as consultant appointment. It's so annoying that I'm nearly 14 weeks now, and I'm going to be over 15 before I have a proper EDD! Silly headstanding baby. It just looked like a dancing blurry sausage on the screen last week.

Hope everyone else is getting on ok, and those waiting for results or scans are managing to get through x

On neutral baby clothes, I saw some Ivory and silver, and Ivory and gold sets of baby grows/ bibs/ hat etc in Toys r us at the weekend. They were really sweet.

Grizzer glad your holiday and hen do went ok.

Cloudjumper really sympathise re the constipation hell. I had similar a couple of weeks ago and did actually block the toilet It was bloody agony and spent ages at that awful point where you get so far then it gets stuck so you kind of have to carry on. Satsumas seem to be doing the trick for now but recall a friend recently saying suppositories are good! Sorry you've suffered too Citymole

Re neutral baby clothes, there's a 2nd hand Po.P group on FB which I've bought from a few times. I'm also in love with the Smafolk newborn sets which include a tie-on bonnet! I don't spend ALL my time buying Scandinavian clothes for DD but know a few places to get bargains...

No medical re-enactments at nursery thank goodness but we had 3 dating scans last night (we had to take turns and rotate the doctor/patient roles) then this eve I was scanned with a yellow triangular stickle brick

Hello all! Back from three days of sunshine in Barcelona (and one rainy one), and four days of blissful denial about results week!

Today is day nine, so theoretically we could hear today, though could be as late as Monday. Strange to think that somewhere out there someone already knows... I am fairly calm - I am saving all the upset for if I need it... I will no doubt have an emotional melt down of some kind whatever the news!

Was up at three am with son who has a bad stomach bug, and now currently sat in the Drs drinking some revolting glucose drink for my g tolerance test... Back to reality...

Really good to get back and see all your posts, am on phone, so hard to read through them, but hope you are all well :)

Debenhams seemed to have only white baby clothes when I looked there and mothers had some bright ones, that weren't necessarily gendered. It's really hard to find good stuff though!

Re constipation, good it's awful isn't it?? The lactulose doesn't shift anything (sorry) bit I have had some luck with sennacot. Still have the best luck with eating lots of fruit and veg and less carbs, two lots of psyllium a day plus,the fresh lime juice in warm water x 2 a day.... BUT its a really big ask to be that organised and be able to stomach stuff like this. I am better able to now, but have to get back into the habit.

Anyway, love to you all :)

eagle that is so adorable - a yellow stickle brick!

Hi moon good to see you back. Glad you had a good time. We are all here for you, lots of love

Hi all, congratulations to u all. I'm 40. After five heart breaking losses over last six years, I can now make a whispering announcement on this group that I am pregnant again (just 4 wks). I had some spotting on wiping which I am hoping its implantation bleed, although 4 days is a bit long for that. I'm on aspirin and progesterone pessaries. Today I am feeling burning sensation in the vagina. It feels hot. Urine is normal no smell or stinging. Could you please advise what it might be and if I could do anything to stop it from becoming a problem. Could it be fungal? I just had a cold local wash and it felt better but again feeling the same :(

27 weeks today, officially in 3rd trimester. Another landmark passed! (Sorry for self indulgent post, but this had dropped off threads I'm on, took me a while to find it, so place marking)