We're posifrickintive! Another posifrickintivity thread for pregnancy after miscarriage

[CommanderShepard]

Last thread ended with a series of Really Good News, so let's hope this one keeps up the trend!

Welcome flumpy!

I have just hurled spectacularly with DD (2.7 years) patting my back and saying "it ok mummy, I look after you and take you to doctors". Bless. She's got a real thing for doctors at the moment and was fascinated by a blood test I had with her in tow - maybe it's in her genes as mum is a nurse who does blood clinics

Seeing an NCT friend today who was lovely and helped with DD when I was miscarrying. Think I will tell her.

Just marking my spot!

So sorry to hear your news mama. Really hope to see you back here again soon.

Time ticking by quickly, am 35+1 today. Beginning to pluck up the courage and am buying baby stuff. I can't believe people are buying Christmas outfits so early. Bonkers! After being in hospital all over Chrimbo with pneumonia, the doctors confirmed yday that there's no need to take Baba out at 36 weeks. Needless to say I couldn't be more relieved! Even though I'm very excited about meeting Bean, I want him/her to stay cooking for a while longer!

Good luck to you all with scans coming up!

God I feel so anxious today. I've been sick 3 times and had a tiny bit of darker cream discharge I possibly imagined. Told NCT friend who was totally lovely and supportive so I cried DD has gone for her nap so I'm resting but my mind is in knots. It's just so early that no one can set my mind at ease.

I have an anxiety disorder that I normally manage well but pregnancy brings out the worst in me.

Glad your friend was supportive commander. Sickness is a good sign. Do you have a therapist or supportive GP who knows about your anxiety and could keep an extra eye on you. It's no denying it's an anxious time but you don't want it tipping into something worse.

That's great news blank. Are you fully recovered yourself now?

I have decided to cut my AN thread some slack from now on. We're all over 20 weeks and I am starting to feel excited at last! I am not sure you can really protect yourself from disappointment anyway so maybe a bit of positive thinking is not such a bad thing.

I hope I might be able to relax more when I get to 20 weeks but it seems unlikely at the moment. Still, 5 weeks today. Less than 4 weeks until booking in appointment. Less than 10 weeks until scan. It seems like forever, but I suppose it isn't really. Just worried that people are going to start guessing before March! Maybe I can persuade my midwife to get me an earlier scan?

I am thank you. I'm just delighted that Bean got to stay in situ for the time that I was ill.

Longest I think at 20 weeks you have every reason to start burying those fears and start getting excited!

It's hard that we all started this journey in the way we did as when we get pregnant again, our excitement is replaced with anxiety. Wait till we feel those newborn cuddles..! This thread is amazing as people who have not gone through such heartaches, can't understand what it's like. It also helps us be more sane in RL when we can vent and seek hand squeezes from this thread!

The midwife called with my Harmony results. 'The best possible result' she said! Looks like bean is going to be ok

Yeay smallbear!

Saddened to read you post mama Hoping it is not as you fear. If it is another mc on a practical front, make sure you get it registered with the doctor. I hope it doesn't get this far, but they will do tests after 3 mcs so it us important to make sure gp knows.

Take care of yourself x

Good newd smallbear

I have allowed myself to buy a moses basket at 33+4 blank and i have washed some newborn sizrd clothes. Realised i have nowhere to store them until we buy some nursery furniture so that'll do for now

Great news Smallbear!!

Hollyben, this is where reality kicks in and the work load doubles!! Something lovely about seeing those tiny vests on the clothes horse!

So, told the head today. He looked relieved when I said due date of September! Glad he's pre-warned now in case I need time off at short notice like I did with the MMC.

Hi all, haven't read back properly yet.
Glad your head was ok doctordonna.

I'm so glad it's the weekend! 4+5 today. Time goes sooo slowly.
Saying that though it has been a week since I found out :)

It's lovely to hear those of you further along giving us who are still in early days hope and positivity!

I need to stay away from Google and stats.

I made the mistake of only doing 1 hpt last time and so I didn't know the levels were dropping so I may do one a week or something for now. What have others done with regards to that?

Other than on hear I plan to attempt to pretend I'm not pregnant until I get to a safe point probably at 20 weeks.

When pregnant with Dd I didn't speak about it until I was 16 weeks although people knew. It's like a barrier to stop myself becoming too attached. It doesn't work.

I'm also very sorry to hear mamas sad news x

Hurrah small bear and welcome flumpy. Still in coldsville over here - they aren't kidding when they say the immune system gives up the ghost once you're pregnant are they!? I can barely move from the sofa, and was hoping to tell my boss about the pregnancy this week along with a speech about how this won't impact on my work and I'm still completely dedicated etc.

Fantastic news small

I did a few tests flump but once I'd passed 2 days after my period was due, I stepped away. I know some ladies continue to test but it'd send me round the twist. It's not easy, particularly after mc, but try to stay positive and believe good stuff is happening, not bad. It's crass but I have got to 13+3 on the sole thought of "I'm not bleeding, must be ok"

Agree with broody. I think I said this yesterday but after I did a couple of tests over consecutive days I gave the bag to DH to hide. As he reminded me "has your AF come? No? Then you're still pregnant! Chill!"

Really feel for all of you who are in weeks 3-8ish. It's such a crap time, being worried, passing the time you MC'd in the last pregnancy etc etc etc. It drags. But by far the greatest likelihood is that you'll get through it fine. I had 2 mcs before this pregnancy and I kept saying to myself "there's a reason the NHS don't do testing until 3, most people don't have 3" over and over again.

I also consciously made the choice to try to enjoy the pregnancy. I didn't always succeed (I came on here to freak out quite a lot!) but I bought a couple of little t shirts, told some friends etc etc. Nothing on the planet could have made me ready to MC, and trying to trick my brain into being ok with the idea of it happening again was just making me stressed all the time. I've bought things with every pregnancy, my philosophy is that the ones bought for the MC'd babies are "gifts" to my eventual healthy baby from its older siblings who never made it. I boxed everything up between pregnancies, and got it out again when I got preg again. Just my way of dealing.

Stay strong ladies, you'll get there! (apologies for the novel of a post!)

I can't tell you how much your words have comforted me, charlie. Thank you so much. You too, broody - you're right, there's no blood so far and Today I am Pregnant.

I'm another in the 'no more testing' camp. I took two with this one, about 40 hours apart, but none after that. With the miscarriage I took two as well, about 24 hours apart, but I don't think more testing would have helped me at all (I think I was losing the pregnancy before I got a BFP) and would have just caused more worry. And DH would have flipped his lid.

When I cried at my friend and said 'OMG the stories on the internet!' she pointed out that there are plenty more people who have normal, healthy pregnancies and don't post. Fair point.

Interesting: I get weepy and upset and convinced something is wrong at about the same time every day, judging by posts here and texts to DH.

Commander - what's the context at the time you get anxious and weepy? What are you doing, where are you, who are you with etc? Maybe if you explore it a little you can break whatever cycle is making you anxious?

I've had problems with anxiety in the past and have had CBT. I'm finding using the techniques I learnt from it really helpful? What do you know works for you when you're anxious?

And what doesn't work when you're anxious for that matter?

Sorry, there was another bit to that last post that bizarrely got deleted. It's not supposed to sound so blunt!

Just in from PT. Because it's my first training session since breaking my foot, it was relatively easy and also pregnancy friendly so didn't need to tell my PT yet. Got a week off now before my next one!