Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Very Scared!

368 replies

Arkkorox · 26/10/2014 18:35

After being up half the night reading the forum ive finaly plucked up the courage to ask you guys for some advice. Bear with me its a long one but I really need to speak to people who know.

Im pregnant and going for my first scan tomorrow - at an abortion clinic. Now this was a bit of a knee jerk panic reaction however I have a feeling that Im going to be over 24 weeks. My last bleed was in april and just for 2 days but heavy. Since then ive had no more bleeding but because of being on the large side its not odd for my periods to come and go as they please. I have had absolutley no symptoms at all, no sickness, no sore boobs, nothing. Untill 2 weeks ago when I felt incredibly bloated and then wednesday when i had a leaky nipple. Took a pregnancy test on thursday and it was positive. Went to the doctors on friday and have my scan tomorrow.

Im 25, been in a relationship with my brilliant boyfriend for 5 years. But we are terrified. Currently living appart to save up for a house depoisit but I changed jobs 2 months ago and he was made redundant a month ago. Hes with his parents and im living with my nan as she sometimes needs help in the night if she falls etc.

If im correct in counting from my bleed in april that would put me at about 27 weeks.... so possibly no going back now! Which Im not entirely dissapointed about and neither is my OH, hes been lovely and less panicky than me!

My biggest issue is telling my parents. My mum is going to totaly flip and I dont want to ruin our good relationship especialy this close to christmas. Please say someone else has been in my shoes? Im so scared its going to ruin everything!!!!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
ELA88 · 29/10/2014 12:19

Good luck meeting your mum, I'm sure now she's had a chance to get her head round the whole idea she won't be as mad. I think parents usually get mad because they worry and only want the best for us, but that isn't always the same as what we want or what will actually happen! My mums friend always says that we're only sent these challenges in life because we are strong enough to deal with them xxx

Arkkorox · 29/10/2014 12:24

The issue is with moving out is that my gran will have to go into a home and sell her house, while I'm here she's okay to stay in her own home.

I am going to go on the register purely because if something happens to my gran I will be buggered. I don't particularly want to move, I just need to sort my life out here!

OP posts:
Arkkorox · 29/10/2014 12:26

I think I'm just having a ' I cant do this' day. Honestly spent about 2 hours just staring out the window this morning.

OP posts:
curiousgeorgie · 29/10/2014 12:26

I'm not sure if I'd bother with a Moses basket, both my DD's were long (and chunky!) and only fit in them for about 8 weeks... We got a crib that fit in our room and both were in it for about 10 months. I sold mine second hand for £40 and there were loads on preloved, some for as low as £10.

curiousgeorgie · 29/10/2014 12:27

And good luck meeting your mum! Everything will be okay in the end... It's very hard not to fall in love with the idea of a grandchild Wink

confusedandemployed · 29/10/2014 13:29

Good luck with your mum Ark. You won't need room for a cot for a few months. Just a moses basket or, as a PP said, a crib might be a better idea in your situation.

Arkkorox · 29/10/2014 16:31

Well I'm shocked. She took me shopping!

OP posts:
maccie · 29/10/2014 16:42

Well thats positive then. Did you buy anything nice ?

NewEraNewMindset · 29/10/2014 16:43

GrinGrin

maccie · 29/10/2014 16:45

Maybe that's the plus side to finding out at 35 weeks, no one has time for doubts or blame. It's a case of getting on with things and organising as much as possible as quickly as you can. SmileSmileSmile

Hellohellohowareyou · 29/10/2014 16:50

Just got to the end of this thread, oh my word what a roller coaster! Massive congrats and I'm glad your mum seems to be getting used to the idea, did you buy some nice things today?

Arkkorox · 29/10/2014 17:09

Nappies etc and some baby grows, the cutest hats and a gorgeous little jumper!

OP posts:
maccie · 29/10/2014 17:29

How's your partner feeling about things now he's had a little time to adjust to the idea. I'm really happy for you that the people closest to you have shown themselves to be supportive of you and your little one.
I'm sure that between you all you will manage to have everything ready once the time comes.

You may also want to look over on the pregnancy boards soon as there will be lots of other people at your stage of pregnancy and there are lots of aspects to childbirth that you haven't considered your preferences on yet. It will probably leave you asking even more questions but I think having the full information means you can make informed decisions.

You also sound very relieved and positive about things now that you have told your parents and have there support.

MrsGrumps · 29/10/2014 18:07

Congrats, been following your thread for the last two days. Don't worry about hurting baby because you have no idea what to do, they are far more robust than they look lol

I am about as far from a natural mum that you could get but my kids have made it to their teens!

confusedandemployed · 29/10/2014 18:58

Ark I'm so happy that your Mum was OK that I'm having a little cry Blush

Now get on with looking forward to meeting your baby!!!

Arkkorox · 29/10/2014 19:53

Thank you guys.

Partner is okay, still coming to terms with it very much so at the moment but I'm just giving him some space and letting him bury his head for a little while. He will be fine once babies here he's just not coping with such a big change, as I expected him to really.

Most important people know now, just various aunties and uncles to go!
Aw sorry for making you cry confused!!!

I'm feeling much better about stuff now I've got my mums support

OP posts:
Arkkorox · 02/11/2014 19:25

Is it normal to go through phases of seriously considering adoption and crying your eyes out for a couple of hours? Im doubting that I can do this.

Then I feel better and I can happily look at slings and pack my hospital bag etc

Then I cant deal with anything baby related and just want to hide in a corner and pretend its all not happening again....

Argh.

OP posts:
Theselittlelightsofmine · 02/11/2014 19:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bondy83 · 02/11/2014 20:18

Totally normal feelings to be scared and think you can't do it. Only advice I can give is take each day as it comes try not to plan too far ahead just set yourself a goal to get to the end of the day,also trust your own instincts your Mum you know what's best for your baby. You'll find your mum and mil will be telling you what the baby likes/needs wants/dislikes just smile nod and agree and carry on doing what you think is right.
You really can do this don't think there's any mum to be ever that doesn't have a panic and wobble just before baby comes.
Hugs
X

maccie · 02/11/2014 20:40

Completely felt the same way and cried on my husbands shoulder that I just wasn't sure I would know what to do, what if I did something wrong, what if I just wasn't a very good mum , and that was at 8 months pregnant with a very much wanted, planned for baby.

Honestly everyone has their worries and doubts about what it was going to be like and when you combine that with late pregnancy hormones it's to be expected that you would feel this way. That's without the added stress/shock of finding out at such a late stage like you did.

Is everyone around you still being supportive ?

maccie · 02/11/2014 20:48

And yes definitley agree with what bondy said about following your own instincts. My mum advised me exactly those words about smile, nod, and carry on doing what feels right to you. That is the best price of advice I was ever given. Everyone and anyone will be commenting on what worked for them, or what you should've doing, but no-one has ever been a mum to your baby but you. You will learn together what works for you both and you will find your way through the first few weeks and you will wonder how you ever lived your life without this tiny little creature in it.

bumpiesonamission · 09/11/2014 21:36

How you doing op?

DiaryOfAWimpyMum · 13/11/2014 16:07

Hope your doing okay OP!

Arkkorox · 13/11/2014 20:01

Oops sorry guys forgot to check back in!

I am fat and feeling very very very pregnant all of a sudden after even last week having a few ' i dont even feel pregnant' moments! Had a midwife appointment yesterday and all is well. Baby is on my left hand side and wont move which is really uncomfy!!!

Last day at work tomorrow thank goodness, not sure I could make it up and down the stairs another day as well as the stress of the kids. Getting excited now, have chosen names and Id quite like it to arrive soon! Got a hospital appointment next friday at 39+4 so hoping that goes well, I really dont want to be too far over :(

Partners doing much better with everything, have been invited round to have tea and cake with his mum next week which was totaly out of the blue but very nice of her ( although slightly terrifying, will keep my exits in sight lol)

Is it normal when you roll over in bed to feel like you need the assistance of a small crane?

OP posts:
bumpiesonamission · 13/11/2014 20:10

Glad all is well.

Yy to the 'small crane', I used to make beep beep sounds like an HGV reversing dh used to call it my 36 point turn!

Swipe left for the next trending thread