Another shiny and new posifrickintivity thread for pregnancy after miscarriage

[PurplePest]

The new thread for mummy-to-be madness, mushiness and mayhem!

Hope things are ok with you today tori

Still having a sucky time thought I might be getting some where with my gp but instead I am sat with no pain relief waiting for a call from the gp wondering if it's worth taking my chances back at A&E trying to get seen by a urologist but what worries me there is the thought of ending up back on the ward I was on before :( at this point my sense of reason is disappearing fast with pain and being so tired :( I never had this problem getting treatment when I was pregnant with DS can't believe the difference between hospitals :(

tory sorry to hear you're going through this. try to concentrate on the positive side of the 50%. I know how hard it is, but SCHs are the commonest cause of bleeding NOT resulting in miscarriage. I had a large SCH diagnosed at about 6w, any grew slowly, and my dates were put back and back, and I was certain of another MC, but here I am at 28 weeks (still knicker-checking and scared to tell anyone despite the obvious bump, but hey ho...). At the time, there were many lovely ladies on here telling me similar stories. Everything crossed for you x

baby so sorry you're still feeling rough, hoping you get some relief soon x

stopeating scan sounds positive, hope all continues well x

sorry for the coming whinge, which sounds particularly feeble given everyone else's woes. I had a phone call from the police this morning. The driver who ran me over a couple of weeks ago has finally responded to letters. Unfortunately his response was, 'I can't remember' and that is where they are leaving things. The officer I spoke to said he had no reason to disbelieve him, which has made me feel that he has some reason to disbelieve me, despite witnesses and hospital reports or my threatened premature labour and broken foot. The camera happen to be pointed up the other road at the time (it alternates views, apparently), so I guess this is where it ends. I don't know why this has upset me so much, but I have spent most of the day in tears as I feel as though they think I have done something wrong, and have got myself so worked up that the baby is really agitated too now. On top of everything else, I have noticed a pinkish discharge. Not enough to send me to antenatal, but enough to panic me even more...
DH telling me to calm down, as that is likely the cause, but much easier said than done.
Sorry for big rant and vent, but trying not to stamp around the house taking it out on everyone else here :(

cuppa that is terrible! I can't believe that's it, case closed, just move on.. that's so thoroughly wrong!

Being told to calm down is so frustrating. I had the same from DP last night, mid snot filled, hyperventilating, full body shakes panic attack. Being told it's not good for me (read the imminently developing baby) did nothing to make me feel better about the whole scan fear situation, strangely!

You rant all you need, all round!

baby I hope you're wherever is most comfortable this evening.

cuppa that's dreadful :(
tori my friend had huge bleeds and was told her DS's hb was slow and he is now a happy healthy 15 month old :) keeping everything crossed for you
stopeating I am at home no way I can go back to hospital as there is no one to look after DS tomorrow did manage to get some strong pain relief after speaking to labour ward and promising it's only for tonight and that I won't take it again with out talking to them 1st so I am dosed up on tramadol hoping that something works out tomorrow but not holding my breathe :(

baby hope you got a night of relief! and a longer term solution soon x

tori the bleed I had when I went in at 6w soaked to my knees on my jeans in a matter of seconds, they scanned me they next day. SCH then was 2.5x the size of the sac. They recommended total bed rest for 3 weeks. It was reduced at the next scan and gone by 14 weeks. I'm so sorry you're going through this, it's horrible, vile and scary. Huge hugs, and fx for you x

I know getting upset doesn't help, but I'm trying not to. I think I've just had enough of nothing going right. Totally exhausted with it all. Just an apology would have been nice...
Then again so would baby being fine (think the consensus is that he is now :) ), a painless foot, and him paying for my bike to be fixed, but hey ho...

Off to meet another doula as the fight for minimal intervention VBAC continues. Wishing everyone a happy, sticky day x

cuppa yes I finally got some rest last night and I got to speak to my midwife this morning who has gotten me an appointment to see my consultant on Friday and has told them I need strong pain relief and treatment for my kidney :) hopefully things will be sorted soon she was very angry at the way I have been messed around so far and will be sorting for
Me to be seen on a different ward if I need to go in again so fingers crossed things will be sorted soon :)

Sorry for being quiet for ages, just life getting in the way I mn time!

Just had to pop on to say tori I also had an SCH, I basically bled from 6 - 15weeks and this varied from a bit of blood to massive bleeds that soaked my clothes and I passed several clots, the biggest being the size of my hand. I totally know how frightening it is but as cuppa said SCH does not always result in mc, very hard to believe at the time I know. So here I am at 24 weeks, still slightly disbelieving that any little bean could survive all that bleeding, but he's in there alright and giving me a good kicking to remind me. Thinking of you x

cuppa I am so sorry you're going through such a rubbish time, can't believe that respone from the police. Will you go back/complain? If you have witnesses etc it might be worth speaking to another officer, if you can face it of course, I'm sure you're just fed up of thinking about it all xx

Is 19 weeks to early for Braxton hicks?? Been getting loads the last hour or so dont remember them being this early with DS.

hi baby, I've seen people post saying they had them from about 20 weeks, so maybe not?

Cuppa, I'm so cross for you, not surprised at all you are feeling like you are. I think for me it is as much what COULD have happened as what did, not to mention the additional pain and worry and anxiety he has put you through - it is the total lack of acknowledgement that gets me - no closure for you at all. I wonder if he has any idea at all about the impact he has had. Agree with the others it might be worth another push, if you can face it - if not, just keep focused on the newborn baby snuggles that will be coming your way in the not too distant future.

tori, defo agree to get a few days off - sick or booked, you need to be focused on yourself and not putting yourself in any position to cause additional exhaustion/stress/worry, or any place where you don't feel as comfortable as possible.

Congrats on being team blue seasalt

Thanks amicable had a bit of a freak out didnt need more going on in top of this with my kidney

cuppa it's awful they can just drop it based on him saying he doesn't remember I'd be fuming if it was me

Cuppa,
My friend who was in a cycle accident had a similar experience with the police, however they changed the report when her solicitor (no win no fee) asked them to re examine it. I approached a specialist cycle solicitor (nwnf) called Slater Gordon after my recent accident-might be worth going down the personal injury route and getting someone else to deal with it if you don't want the driver to get away with it?

how are you feeling today baby and tori?

Advice please from those who have DC already - I have an anterior placenta so although feel kicks not as much as those without. My baby books say many people can see a foot or hand sticking out with a kick at this point, but the most I've had is a visible shake of the bump - and that is pretty rare. MW said as long as there is movement it doesn't matter how strong. Is this the case in your experience? And just wondering if I can expect them to get any stronger now - I'm coming up to 30 weeks. Been up a couple of times already to the hospital because not feeling anything, but starting to think that it is just a quiet baby + the placenta at the front. Thanks ladies!

Hi Moomin - I have the same, and have noticed a shake, same as you, but no limbs sticking out. I have noticed that I have a lot of times, where I can physically feel with my hand the movement, but not feel it inside. I have had several trips as well, and baby is always doing somersaults. To be honest, I can't feel much unless I am lay down, which is not a lot in the day!!! Hope you get an answer from a more reliable source!!

Went and met with the Diabetic Nurse, consultant and Anaesthetist yesterday and they all scared the crap out of me. I have a BMI of 48.5 which I know is disgusting. However in this pregnancy, I was weighed yesterday and have put on 1 kilo since my booking in weight, which means I have actually lost weight and am trying.

They told me that because of my weight, I may have problems in labour, and if I have to be put out, if the baby is in distress and they can't give me an epidural quick enough, then the chances of me not waking up are higher! Lovely! And now I have to decide if I want an epidural as soon as I am induced, or if I wait, and take the risk, providing of course they can give me an epidural, in what I assume they think, is my enormous flabby back!!

I know I need to know the risks, but right now I am terrified, and as Hubby was at his new job, I was all alone to hear this news!

I am supposed to be at work now, but am having to go in later, as I feel so awful. I can't work out if its the stress of it all, or just feeling like Crap! Feeling a little bit fed up, and when I talk to anyone other than hubby, my friends who have been pregnant, just tell me about their labour - which doesn't help!!! Anyway - Rant over!!! :) Happy Wednesday All!!

cuppa that is a shocking response from the police. Commit a crime, say you don't remember and off you go Appalling!

Glad you are getting some support from you mw baby. I hope the consultants help.

I am open mouthed at how you were spoken to liesal I understand they have to outline the risks etc (I watch more than my fair share of Casualty and Holby City) but there is a way of doing these things and that sounds inappropriate to me x

I had an anterior placenta with DD. I felt nothing until 23 weeks and never really had anything too big. Sometimes at work I'd see my pass move but there were very few times when DH could feel anything. I did see the outline of a limb once or twice but kate on.

amicable I had an anterior placenta and never saw any limbs, I also could also quite often see my bump shaking but not be able to feel it cos of the placenta. The movement did change between 30 and 40 (well 42 weeks for me) but I'm not sure if they really got stronger or jus changed a few times to be honest. But it all sounds normal to me!

Sorry to see there is a few of you having a hard time. cuppa I can't believe that treatment from the police! Hope your ok

That's right, I'm still lurking a little... I'm like a little mumsnet orphan having Nowere to post properly haha

leisal it sounds like they were quite harsh, I no they have to give you the worst case scenarios but it could be handled better! But atleast you no they will be keeping a very close eye on you and the baby so if anythin does go wrong theyl no straight away and act before it gets serious

leisal can't believe they were so harsh to you I hope you complain that's awful :(

Pain wise I am doing allot better thanks to my midwife sorting me out with good pain relief :) now obsessing about babies movement though because of the strong pain relief i'm worried it will hurt the baby even though I am assured the worst it will do is make baby sleepy. Being scanned to check all is well with baby on Friday as well as seeing the consultant so hopefully I'll be able to relax a bit after that

To add to the placenta/limbs thing... I don't remember even with a posterior last time actually seeing limbs per se. This time (anterior), I can see lumps sometimes, but I couldn't say what they were (sometimes if I am feeling it it might seem more like a hand or a knee, but that is based on feeling the shape from the outside). Sometimes whole bump shifts or jumps, other times just a poke, but not like the pictures of hands/feet sticking out you sometimes see.
cuppa, are you a member of CTC or LCC or similar? You have some insurance/legal cover via this route if so; they may be able to pursue this on your behalf.
alb, hope all is well with you and lo, and that you're settling in nicely together.

afm, all quiet here, just sick and tired of how reliant my coworkers/supervisees are on me... am really worried about how they will cope when I am not here to wipe their metaphoricals... and what mess I will come back to, as one of my main roles can't/won't be covered by my Mat cover person. Is a nightmare. Spent 2h yesterday and at least an hour retraining the same person again (and been interrupted twice whilst writing this to check things, but fair enough, I am at work!). Gah, I don't need this. For those of you who have made it to/past this gestation before (I had DD at about this stage), is it normal to feel a dragging sensation on standing/walking? Bump just feels really heavy, in front vs. down below, but it is worrying me.

Thanks all for the info - really helpful and has calmed me right down. Liesal I am so impressed with how little you've put on - that is quite something, focus on that rather than beating yourself up. I'm massively regretting my lack of fitness at the moment as well as the amount of weight I've put on during pregnancy - think how much we will lose running around afterwards though!!!!! It sounds like they gave you a lot of info to take in all at once (and not in the most sympathetic manner!) so not surprised you need a little time out to get your head around things and start to think about your choices. Give yourself some time and be kind! xx

Thank you all for your kind words! I was upset and I know she was only doing her job, but she couldn't even tell me why I would have more problems - I suppose I should be grateful that they are keeping an eye on me.
Its all getting very real and very scary, and then to top things off, I watched an x factor audition video on you tube where the guys wife had died in labour. and was a mess for about an hour! Love the hormones!! :)

liesal that's a horrible way to speak to you, especially as it is impossible to be overweight in todays society without being aware of associated risks; to have things rubbed in in such a cruel manner is just lain unnecessary. Really angry on your behalf!

moomin my placenta is posterior, and i see arms, legs, feet, hands and the head, so maybe that is the difference. Although consultant would have it that it's because i haven't gained enough weight (can't win feeling...) was the same last time too. Personally, I thought it looked revolting then, and am ignoring it now. I was told that any movement counts, and that we are all different. x

wondered what anyone's opinions are on declining consultant care? I know it sounds crazy, but I am fighting for my VBAC, and am really freaked out by consultant led unit and monitoring after last time. When I told consultant that I had been happy at home, but like maybe MLU as a compromise (it's one floor down!), she told me and wrote in my notes that I need psych evaluation! Am furious, and now neuro have said that baby is OK, am considering not going back - hate confrontation at the best of times!
TIA for you opinions

stressful time at home too, as I try to get rid of self-invited houseguests (been here a week and counting, grrr). wish me luck! xx

a week?!??! Go for it cuppa, they need to leave!!!!!!!

cuppa after a week I'd be throwing them out of the door lol

Getting ready to go through writing my complaint about the weekend dh's cousin oddly a nurse at the hospital I was in is going to help me

best of luck with that baby, get mad!