Hyperemesis Support

[LucindaE]

I hope everyone suffering from the Horrors of Hyperemesis will find this thread useful as a source of support and information.

There's no TMI on here - can't be by definition - and nobody should feel ashamed of moaning as much as they feel the need to.

MOH's wonderful website is full of useful information on this illness:
sites.google.com/site/pregnancysicknesssos/
Another invaluable website is:
www.pregnancysicknesssupport.org.uk/
If you need help in obtaining medication, this phone number is
brilliant:
024 7638 2020

Lastly, the NICE guidelines on treatment are useful:
cks.nice.org.uk/nauseavomiting-in-pregnancy#!prescribinginfosub

I would like to thank Everyone who has given such invaluable support and advice on this and on previous threads.

Remember when you are at your worst, 'This Too Shall Pass'. It really will.
So many women on this thread have thought they couldn't get through this, but they did.

flowery sounds grim . I think all people with no understanding of HG (like your MIL) should be banned from talking about it, it's so cruel, when you haven't even got the strength to hit them be witty back.

The 'are you feeling better' is soooo annoying. I know people mean well but seriously just leave me alone!!

Then there is the 'well I'm sure you'll feel better soon' (I doubt it given how long it's been going on) and the 'it'll be worth it in the end' (hard to believe currently) and 'you'll forget all about it as soon as you have the baby' (I very much doubt that this will just magically disappear from my memory!).

Totally agree with the rant!

Flowery I can completely sympathise re: tactless MIL. I've had many moans on here about mine. Last week she came round moaning how hot it was outside, I mentioned I'd had to coop myself up with the windows shut on such a hot day as the 2 workman outside our house were smoking and I couldn't bear the smell. MIL's response...........she laughed.
My DD2 has her first full afternoon at big school tomorrow afternoon. There is also a meeting for parents which I'm still debating whether or not I'm going to. On Wednesday evening there is a meeting for parents at the secondary school where DS will be starting in September, trying to think of a way to get out of that too. I know I'm a bad mummy but DD2 is the 3rd child I've had to start at that primary school and DS will be my 2nd child to start secondary school.....do I really need to keep going to these meetings???

Lucinda hope you are feeling better?

Kali Glad you are out of hospital, fingers crossed they will continue the right course of treatment for you.

Elizabethsmum What awful news, it hits home that it can happen to anyone. Lets hope with medical advancements they can prolong her life for as long as possible.

Sorry for everyone I have missed, hope you are all ok?

I've had a rough weekend, not been feeling great at all, slept pretty much all day on Saturday. MIL & particularly FIL are really pissing me off at the moment. DH is irritating me too so probably hormones just making things feel 10 times worse.

Oh dear, Mampam Okla Flowery and Everyone about tactless MIL comments, meetings, duties, socialblity and doing too much. I do think people with this push themselves too far. Of course, the cross questioning is because people find it hard to credit how bad it is, that it won't totally disappear at 14 weeks (unless you are very lucky),etc.
To be honest, I never know myself if I should ask how people are feeling - the answer might well be 'How do you - well think?!' .
I just hope the ice lollies are soothing people...
xx

Thanks all for the support! I went in this morning at 8.20am to talk to the headteacher before school about the e-mail where I confirmed with the headteacher that I couldn't do lunch duties when I worked in the morning as 8.30-1.30 was too long. He said fine and I suggested switching my Wednesday morning to Wednesday afternoon so I could do a duty then - and work 12.30-3.30.

He said fine, but stressed that at some point I had to increase my hours. I said I agreed in principle but at the moment I simply couldn't tolerate it and I felt, unfortunately, that an increase might lead to me being signed off again, and I thought some hours were better than none. So he agreed.

He then came to see me at 12 and told me I didn't look good, and that I might be taking on too much - and I told him I was leaving at 12.25, as he knew. We had another meeting when I pointed out how clear it was that I couldn't do the duties and he agreed, was very supportive, and told me to look after myself. We agreed we would look at it again after Wednesday afternoon (when I have PPA anyway so no actual teaching) and if I needed to go back to the doctor I would.

So I was pleased that he finally got it, and exhausted but pleased.

I then drove the 22 miles home, and found on my return, an email from this lunchtime from the (bitch and bully of an) Assistant Head, berating me for not turning up to do my lunch duty and not letting her know. Who know letting the Headteacher know at 8.20am wasn't good enough! Sadly, I assumed they'd communicate...

That was just too much and I broke down on the sofa - and am tempted to get myself signed off. The only reason I'm going in on the Wednesday is to do a duty to help her out, and to write a risk assessment for a trip she's leading! Gah!

Sorry for the rant...

Henrietta I hope you emailed her back and told her you had spoken to the head. This kind of stuff at work is the last thing you need. Hopefully she will back off. Glad you had a productive meeting with the head though

At the moment I'm just too angry to reply. I need to calm down before I compose a response!

Henrietta ugh, what a vile person. And to get that reaction after working so hard under the most trying circumstances.... grrrr!! I'm not surprised you are furious. Maybe email her and copy your Head in on the message? At least you are professional, even though she clearly isn't!

henrietta that really is horrendous, I've worked in a variety of different schools and some schools sadly do have this bullying culture.

Fight fire with fire.

Reply CCing the head explaining what happened today. Then summarise the conversations you had today with your head about managing your return to work sensibly (so that it is writing). I would also stress at the end that you are still feeling very unwell and that it is well documented that stress and overdoing things in the recovery period can lead to a relapse in HG cases.

And then honestly, if things don't improve go sick til summer, it just isn't worth the stress it's causing you. Might be worth an informal chat with your union rep as well? Perhaps even CC them into the email if you want to really set the cat among the pigeons.

Basically you have to get to the point where the assist. head doesn't dare bully you for fear of the repucussions, making it more work for them if they piss you off because you can't be bullied into working yourself into the ground.

I know this is all very well for me to say from my relatively well vantage point, at my worst I would have just sobbed for three days unable to enact any of this so massive hugs and hand holding from me.

kalidasa I'm so glad you are home and I really hope things start to improve for you very, very soon.

living be gentle on yourself re: the exercise. People say it takes 9 months to put on the weight and at least that much again to slowly take it off again. But, I'm convinced it takes longer than that when you consider you are not only focusing on your own body and health, but taking care of your baby AND have the added issues of hg and mental health. With my anxiety attacks, I find it really hard to do any exercises that raise my heart-rate because I immediately begin to panic - not useful when trying to get fitter!!

Henrietta that sounds horrible. Totally not what you need when you're feeling so crap anyway. Some people are just inconsiderate and mean. Nothing to add to previous suggestions but sending lots of sympathy. If in doubt throwing up on her might help!

Henrietta I'm shocked at the insensitivity of this deputy head - I can't improve on the other suggestions, I so agree wtith those, do inform head, and do advise union of the harassment aspect. Hugs.

xx

My gag reflex is so screwed. It thinks building up to a sneeze and building up to puke are the same thing. Cue the sneezevom, my least favourite combo. Nine more weeks...

mrsgembles I thought that was just me!! I'm exactly the same!!! Whenever I feel a sneeze coming on, I squeeze my nose and do everything I possibly can to avoid sneezing!! It feels So awful when your body thinks sneezing/being sick is essentially the same thing!! Ugh!

I have the same sneeze / vomit (and cough / vomit) gag thing going on. Especially problematic just now as I am struggling with hayfever (for the first time in my life, I've never had hayfever before).

Henrietta that is just awful. The only think I can suggest, with my solicitor hat on, is to tackle it head on - ask for a meeting with the head & deputy together, explain to them in no uncertain terms how you are feeling (making it very clear for employment law purposes that it is pregnancy related, but more than simply just being pregnant) and the significant limitations that this imposes on your ability to work, and ask for agreement going forward as to how you are to inform the school should you be unable to carry out your assigned duties. Make a note of what is said, and maybe summarise it in an email to the head and deputy. That would at least put a very clear line in the sand, so that if it was crossed the next time you could go straight to your union.

Not much to report here. Still nauseous and a bit sick, but much better than a few weeks ago. Exhausted due to my non-sleeping children (5.30 wake up today!). Slightly p'd off with DH; don't want to really go down the DH bashing route as he is generally a gem and has been very good with all of this, but now that I'm a little bit better and managing to cope on a daily basis he is definitely keen to pick up with his life as well. He's out on a work night out tonight, then off to London tomorrow and Thursday for Wimbledon (he goes every year, so it's not like it's a once in a lifetime opportunity), so I have 3 bedtimes and 3 lots of night wakings to do on my own. I know that it doesn't sound much, and normally it wouldn't bother me - I'm used to him being away - but at the moment I'm just making it through the day, and I absolutely live for 6.30pm when he walks through the door! He will have some making up to do come the weekend....

mrsg sneezevom sounds horrific Do you manage to aim in the right direction?

Henrietta how are you feeling today re: your job?

AFM - Not doing too well today, physically and emotionally I'm feeling really lonely and isolated. I'm quite tired and have a stomping headache so probably the reason why I'm feeling quite down.

Oh dear, Mrsgeggles Starryand Some Sunny sounds a really nasty variant - I had a Cough Vomit set off by heartburn, but not that. Mampam Sorry you feel so down, hugs.
Not sure if I*m being annoying if I say, 'How is everyone doing? I don't want to be like certain MIL's...
xx

Coughvomming happens to me too. In fact, last time it happened was on the day I tried to return to work, in a colleague's classroom! The dept head came along and convinced me to go home again!

Hello ladies

This is my 2nd HG pregnancy and I lurked all of my last pregnancy but never felt up to posting.

Am currently 8 weeks and it's just ramped up a gear in the last couple of days. Feeling very miserable.

I'm also a teacher and have been signed off since week 7 I know from bitter experience last time there's no point in trying to go back too soon so I'll hopefully go back in September that's about when I felt better last time.

I'm so gutted to be missing the last few weeks of term as I teach year 6 and should be doing so many fab things with them to see them on their way. Luckily my hea and deputy are amazing. They really just want the best for me and the baby. Plus I think are secretly happy I waited until after sats!

The hardest bit this time is my little boy. He's just turned two and he knows something's wrong. I can barely play with him and its making me miserable. He's at the childminders most of the week so he has fun and I rest but even she says he's a bit emotional and clingy. Not like him at all. It
Just breaks my heart.

I just want the next 10 weeks to be over. This should have been such a great summer with my boy xx

Dragnoboobs Welcome. I'm glad the thread helped last time. Sorry things are so bad, I hope it peaks soon for you. Your LO will get over this sooner than you'd believe, if others' experiences are anything to go by- children are very resilient and he'll forget and have a sibling and ally. Everyone is very supportive on here. Lots of teachers, too(there usually are). What meds are you on? have yo kept out of hospital?
Mrsg That sounds awful! Any movement of the diaphram (sp) beyond shallow breathing seems to set it off. Talking can!

xx

had a shit consultants appointment today. Had a senior midwife there to advocate for me but it was still horrendous. Really missed DH being on the other side of the world. She just went on and on and on and I was sobbing uncontrollably. It was just awful.

Sorry know this isn't a HG issue, but just feel so awful. Had to come back to work afterwards and pull myself together for teaching year 9. Now I'm hiding in the office (everyone else has gone) and sobbing again, don't want to go home to an empty house.

Another sneezevom victim here plus a bit of pee! Sneezevompee?

Oh no Lottie that doesn't sound good. Why wouldn't they listen to you?

Thanks for the welcome Lucinda.

I'm on cyclizine have managed to stay out of hospital. Hope it stays that way cos I need to finish my reports!

I dont know okla I couldn't get a word in edgeways, she just went on and on about how a natural delivery would solve all my issues and enable me to lead a 'normal life' and how if I had a cesarean I'd be putting any future children at risk and didnt I want my child to have siblings in the future.

I didn't even tell her I wanted a fucking cesarean, I just wanted an intelligent discussion about the risks re. Benefits in my ( quite complicated case). I didn't get any questions answered because once I broke down I couldn't get any of the words out or compose a rational sentence. And she just wouldn't shut up.

No decisions were reached and I have to go back in 4 weeks.